


Anime Nerd: Confessions of a Weaboo

by CloudFlower



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Anime References, AnimeNerd!Eren, Eren Can Cook, Eventual Smut, Fashion Mikasa, Fluff, Grisha Jaeger is....somewhere, Humor, It's sad because Eren isn't actually clumsy, Levi can play piano, M/M, POV First Person, Parody, Rude!Levi, but what good is fluff and smut if they don't hate each other first right?, eren has clumsy moments, ereri, excessive use of the fuck word, fanfiction parody, riren - Freeform, stupid chapter titles that I hope will make you smile, there will also be fluff!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-05
Updated: 2015-10-31
Packaged: 2018-04-07 17:03:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 79,524
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4271085
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CloudFlower/pseuds/CloudFlower
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eren is a complete anime nerd. Not a weeabo. That's different. Eren does still have some remnants of a life and has better things to do then spend all day sitting in his room watching anime and reading fan-fiction...usually.<br/>So what if Eren has a passion for making anime references? And if he wears some pretty unconventional T-shirts on his days off, that's his business and his alone.</p><p>So why does it piss him off so much when a certain guy won't stop calling him a loser?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. But Then Everything Changed When...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "But then everything changed when the fire nation attacked" -Avatar
> 
> Eren is enjoying a nice calm summer day. Until ice cream and a guy who resembles Feitan are added into the mix.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so this was my first crack at trying to write fan fiction. It's kinda cool (if a little embarrassing) to be able to look back on this and see the difference between my first attempt -this- and the most recent shenanigans I've written.  
> This fic is a light-hearted parody with humor and lots of anime references, but no spoilers. If that kinda thing interests you -have at it. If that's not your thing, that's fine too.
> 
>  
> 
> Enjoy!

 

 The day started like any other might have.

 

Mikasa was bustling around the room trying to find something, while I lazily sat on my bed, propped up by pillows and the headboard. I was reading the newest chapter of my current favorite fanfic, but, knowing that it wouldn’t be updated again anytime soon, I happily welcomed a distraction. This way it would take me longer to finish and I would be able to put off the inevitable wait. Hopefully for another few hours. I had been avoiding it for the past two days, but I didn’t have any classes today and couldn’t force myself to wait any longer.  

Stupid writers and their hiatuses. Why do they have to have lives? Why couldn’t they just write beautiful fanfics that featured my OTP and made my heart go doki doki all day every day?

But the world's not perfect. And that's what makes it so damn beautiful([x](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/67/e8/10/67e8109d916e88c32671a387b1f9e315.jpg)).

I chuckled at my thoughts and mentally patted myself on the back for my wittiness.

I allowed my eyes to drift from the obnoxiously bright screen to my sister’s face in order to laugh at her expression. It wasn’t every day I got to see my sister's face sporting a mixture of concentration, annoyance, and downright frustration. It only happened when she was on her knees digging through my dresser for something to wear because either she didn’t feel like wearing anything in her closet, or  I just happened to own the only cardigan that would fabulously match with her outfit.

It wasn’t out of the ordinary for her to run into my room and steal some random article of clothing.

Don’t even get me started on accessories either. Bags, shades, scarves, hats, ties, I swear once she even stole a stick of deodorant from my stash because hers ran out. (Although that evening she had claimed that smelling like me was absolutely too weird, and promised that she would never take my deodorant again.) 

It sucked that some of the shit I bought for myself ended up looking better on her- for her it was just perks of having a brother that sometimes cared what he looked like.

Either way, I never really minded if she took something that belonged to me, as long as it made its way back to my room eventually after she did her laundry, which knowing Mikasa, it would. She always asked before borrowing things and gave them back when she was done, which meant that I would say yes whenever she asked to borrow something again. And thus a beautiful circle full of trust and happiness was established. Not that I would ever say no after Mikasa had already dug around all the crap to find my real clothes.

Right now my T-shirts were pretty much everywhere. Most were on the floor and various states of dirty, therefore finding something both clean and void of any weird design was a serious investment of time and effort. 

I mean hey, I like all of my T-shirts but for some reason Mikasa has never appreciated my taste in that area. I don’t usually wear them in public, just around the house. She can call me a loser all she wants, but my T’s can say whatever I damn well please. And 9/10 times it’s something extremely nerdy and related to anime.

The 1/10 were the shirts that didn’t have any words. They were still nerdy, but not _as_ embarrassing…usually. 

Pulling out a black T-shirt from the bottom of the drawer she was currently digging through and unfolding it, she read it and then glanced sideways at me, raising an eyebrow.

“Really?” she asked as she turned the article so I could see what she was talking about.

_Kneel Before Your Senpai_  was written in large bold letters, covering the entire front of the [shirt](http://www.redbubble.com/people/poofette/works/12957463-kneel-before-your-senpai-white?grid_pos=1&p=t-shirt).

I couldn’t help but crack a smile. “What?” I asked defensively.

“Oh nothing, nothing at all.” Mikasa dramatically rolled her eyes and continued her quest. “ I wouldn’t dream of walking out of this house in one of your T-shirts anyway. No matter how 'comfy' they might be, it’s not worth the embarrassment.”

“Hey! Some of those shirts are definitely socially acceptable and cool.”

She momentarily stopped her search in favor of turning towards me wearing her 'Yeah, uh huh. Sure.' expression. 

“Yep definitely. Like the one you’re wearing right now."

I couldn’t remember for the life of me what I was wearing without glancing down at myself. I was wearing a perfect T for a day like today. 

“Laziness I choose [you!](http://ih1.redbubble.net/image.13800550.2050/fig,white,mens,ffffff.u2.jpg)” I yelled dramatically as she rolled her eyes once again and made that sound of exasperation that only an older sister can. “C’mon Mikasa, it’s beautiful. It’s the most truthful shirt I could have worn on a day where the furthest I’ve moved my ass is to the fridge and back.”

At this she chuckled and resigned her judgmental stare in favor of returning to her mission. 

It wasn't long before she let out a sound that could only be described as triumph. _And cardigan it was!_ I thought as she pulled out the light beige sweater and rose gracefully to her feet. 

“Don’t you have a cardigan of your own that looks exactly like that?”

She shook her head adamantly. “No, mine is darker and this one has a lower cut. Plus, it goes nicely with the shoes I want to wear.”

I couldn't do anything but sigh and shake my head. “Whatever Mika, have fun. Are you hanging out with Annie afterward?”

She nodded with a smile and left the room, gently shutting the door on her way out.

I finished the chapter within the next fifteen minutes. So much for putting off the inevitable. 

~

It was barely past noon and I was bored senseless. I didn’t want to do anything that would lead to a serious time investment, like starting up a new anime, but at the same time, I was overcome by the need to just do SOMETHING. 

Jumping out of bed, I went to go check to see if Mikasa had taken the car, or if Annie had come by and picked her up. It made all the difference. 

It would be nice not to be limited on where I could go. 

But alas the world was a cruel place and the car keys were in fact gone. My life. Walking it was. 

See this day had started out as normal—me lounging in bed, with my best friend Mr. Computer—but quickly took a turn towards the absurd when I realized the car was gone. For some reason, my desire to get out of the two-bedroom apartment didn’t die down when I realized walking would be my only option. On a normal day off I would’ve went straight back to bed at the thought of exerting any effort. But I didn’t. Instead, I tugged off my Snorlax Tee and grabbed a black Fullmetal Alchemist [shirt](http://ih0.redbubble.net/image.94471018.6965/ra,unisex_tshirt,x3104,black,front-c,650,630,900,975-bg,f8f8f8.jpg) that was at the top of the pile. It just had a transmutation circle on it. No words or anything too weird that would inspire people to send their judgmental glances my way. See I could be socially conscious. 1 point for Eren. 

I decided to make my way towards a local ice cream parlor that was next to a nice park with a huge pond. It was a great place to go to just sit in the grass and be outside. And today was a perfect day for ice cream and cloud watching. 

I arrived without incident and entered the back of the line. The place was always swarmed with little kids pulling their parents towards the window and jumping around excitedly. The scene always made me smile a little bit. Seeing all the small kids around and taken its toll and I couldn't resist from ordering a chocolate-vanilla twist with rainbow sprinkles. It was that kind of day. I could feel the little kids stare at my ice cream wide-eyed and then look at their parents, mouth agape, before yelling out, “Mommy I want That!”

Whoops.

The place would be out of rainbow sprinkles by the end of the day.

I walked towards a vacant bench near the pond. It seemed like a nice quiet place to just sit and eat, all the while pondering the mysteries of life. And anime. But mostly just to stuff my face with heaven on a wafer cone in peace.

Unfortunately, I was so wrapped up in my ice cream and making sure that nothing dripped onto my fingers that I failed to avoid a man that had his back turned to me. I crashed straight into him with a yelp. Tripping over my own feet, I fell backward and landed oh-so-gracefully on my ass. The man turned his head to send a rather angry glare at whoever had dared to just run into him and _dear God did I just get Ice Cream on the back of his shirt?_ Fuck Fuck _Fuuuuuck_! 

Sure enough, the back of his black shirt was now decorated with a mess of white ice cream and rainbow sprinkles.

His gray eyes narrowed as he looked from my shirt, to my face, and finally to the cone in my hand. I contemplated hiding it behind my back and praying that he had short-term memory loss. Or really any disease that would cause him to forget the past five seconds.

Unfortunately, he still remembered and by the more venomous glare he was giving me now, he could feel what I had just done to the back of his shirt.

 “I am so sorry!” I scrambled up to my feet, but had the urge to sink back down to the ground and yell _Please forgive me!!!_ Basically, anything for him to spare my life.  

“Tch. Can you at least go get me a fucking napkin? Actually never mind your hands are probably fucking dirty.”

I was kinda stunned. He was just as rude as he looked, but he had a really nice voice. For some reason his short stature had made me expect something...I don’t even know, just not that.  

“Fuck I’m really sorry.” I scanned the surroundings looking for anything to make this better.  

A short ways off was a family of four enjoying themselves. Obviously the parents were pretty smart and knew how to hand two small kids because they brought an entire mountain of napkins and wipes with them. Glancing at the man in front of me I threw a quick “wait here” and jogged towards the family, throwing the rest of my ice cream into a trash bin. 

“Excuse me, I’m sorry to bother you, but would you be able to spare some wipes and napkins?” I pleaded. The mother seemed really sweet and told me to take whatever I needed. Grabbing a handful of wipes and a few napkins I made my way back hastily to the angry short guy still glaring at me.

“Would you mind turning around so I can get the ice cream off?” I said calmly. Amazingly he did so without a remark. Once I had done all that I could to clean him up, I started apologizing once more, but was cut off by a wave of his hand. 

“Whatever brat. I don’t need your fucking apology. Just watch where the fuck you’re going.” With that he stormed off towards the parking lot.

 

 I felt like I had just pissed off the devil.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well Eren did manage to piss off Levi in the first chapter so his future is looking a little bleak, but hey as far as first impressions go, Eren certainly made a lasting one ;)  
> I hope all of the links worked. If they didn't work let me know.
> 
> I added in a little FullMetal Alchemist to get things kicked off ;)  
> [ tumblr](http://http://cloudflowerkami.tumblr.com/)


	2. Feitan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Piece of Crap...Know Your Place!!" -Feitan  
> Eren has some down time with Armin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now starts the anime references.  
> Links to pictures of characters will be attached...and will hopefully work  
> yay! v(=∩_∩=)ﾌ 
> 
> (x) -Most of the time these will bring you to MyAnimeList but sometimes they're pictures or songs..  
> (v) -means it's a link to a video.  
> There might be a (g) or (p) for gif or picture too ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯  
> (***)-This weird looking thing means CLICK ON ME! I dont use those a lot.  
> Phantom Troupe: A group of murderous thieves who don't let anything stand in their way. They are all very powerful.  
> Feitan: A member of the Phantom Troupe. He is the group's interrogator and excels in the art of torture.

“Armin I’m telling you, he looked just like [Feitan](http://vignette4.wikia.nocookie.net/hunterxhunter/images/4/43/FeitanGR.png/revision/latest?cb=20120729221434) from [Hunter X Hunter](http://myanimelist.net/anime/11061/Hunter_x_Hunter_\(2011\)). He was wearing all black and everything. But it wasn’t even just what he was wearing! He had the stature too! Okay maybe he’s a little taller than Feitan, but he was still short! And the eyes, Amrin! His EYES! He could’ve totally passed as a cold-blooded murderer!”

Armin leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms. 

“You’re telling me that you went to the park and dumped ice cream on Feitan’s doppelgänger? How did you live through that?” he asked bringing his coffee to his lips to take a sip.

We were meeting inside our favorite café. It was Saturday and we both had things to talk about. The place was great. It was nice and cozy and once you ordered yourself a cup of coffee, no one cared if you stuck around for hours. It was a nice atmosphere for just relaxing and talking.

“To be honest I thought I was gonna die, but I got some wipes and napkins and cleaned up his shirt and then he just stalked off.”

“I’m actually kind of surprised you didn’t ask for this guy’s autograph in case it really was Feitan. It would be even funnier if that was his given name, or if his name was something close,” Armin paused giving me a killer look, “like Satan.” He couldn’t hold in his laughter any longer.

I shook my head “Armin that’s way too scary to be funny”

“So what was his name?”

“I don’t know. I never got it, I didn’t really want to ask either.”

Armin accepted this with a nod and went back to drinking his coffee.

"He was super rude too. But I mean I did kind of expect that, after all I dumped rainbow sprinkled ice cream on him. What I didn't expect was his voice. Feitan definitely has a higher voice and it's still really scary so that's what I thought would come out and then it was all low and sexy. Don't get me wrong it was still scary and he was super pissed, but...." I shrugged thinking back to that velvety voice.

He nodded, "You know I think you should have expected Satan to have a low voice." He nodded to himself and fell quiet.

I followed suit and we settled into a comfortable silence. I decided that it would be a good time to switch the conversation over to Armin. He always had interesting stories about new things that he had been researching. Armin was my best friend and a complete genius. I had complete confidence that his big brain would do amazing things in the future.

“So Armin, how’s-“ 

Before I could finish, my attention was drawn to the door as I heard the bell signaling a customer’s entrance and I stopped cold.

“Armin,” I whispered, too scared to talk normally, “don’t turn around too suddenly, but look behind you.”

Armin’s eyes widened, but he did as I instructed in a perfectly casual manner. I could tell that he was able to quickly pinpoint who I meant.

“God twice in one week, what’s with my luck?” I muttered under my breath.

Armin slowly turned his head back towards me. Despite the air of calm around him, his expression showed how surprised he was. He leaned forward before saying in a hushed voice, “omg you are so right.”

“Right?!!!”

He made a cut motion with his hand to signal me not to be too loud. He propped his elbow on the table and rested his chin on his hand.

“He’s totally scary. Although I will say that the hair is different. This guy’s hair is much nicer. The undercut looks quite good; Feitan had more of the wild, mussed look. Well, I hope to God he doesn’t hold a grudge, because if he takes after Feitan, he’s a master of torture and you’re a dead man. In the most painful way possible. Even Feitan felt bad for his victims. Although I think you’re safe for now because he would have killed you yesterday, but that might just have been him letting you go so that he could track you and wait until you completely relaxed and thought you had gotten away, but that would all be a lie and just as you have the best day of your life he’ll make his move and violently kill you. The tracking in and of itself is a good way to set up for psychological torture. I mean there are so many different ways to torture someone. He might just make you go insane first.”

I blinked at him, “I think you might beat him to it...I swear Armin if you ever decided to become an evil bad guy, you’d be the scariest of them all" I shook my head sadly, considering the consequences of such an idea. "You're too fucking intelligent. And cute. People wouldn’t suspect you. The cops would never know. My death would go unnoticed and unavenged.”

He held his arms up in surrender. "Don't look at me. Satan's the one who's got it out for you."

Armin laughed softly before going back to thinking. He was completely off in his own world imagining the most traumatic ways that my death could be brought down on me.

“Armin…it’s like you’re okay with me dying.” 

“Well as soon as I looked at that guy’s face… I mean you know what they say 'If looks could kill’…"

“I’d be dead three times over.” I finished. “Although that’s his natural face. You should have seen him after he realized that I got ice cream on his shirt. It was enough to make a grown man pee himself.” That trail of thought was actually a little reassuring. “You know Armin, that being said, I think I’m rather proud of myself for not wetting my pants on the spot. I’m amazing.” Now it was my turn to stare off into space deep in thought. I happily sat there reliving my life accomplishments. It’s the little things you have to appreciate. Though I did have to wonder if I pissed off the devil, would he send me to hell or ban me from hell because he wouldn’t want to look at my face? 

“So,” Armin started, cutting off my train of thought, “since he looks like the brother of Feitan, but also resembles the devil, I think Satan is a rather fitting name. At this point I’m almost glad that you don’t know his real name. It would kind of ruin it.” He smirked at me, obviously very happy with this turn of events. 

I hid behind my coffee cup the entire time that Satan was in the café. Luckily he seemed to just be grabbing something to go and didn’t stick around too long. 

I couldn’t help the long exhale that came when he finally walked out the door. I hadn’t realized that I had been holding my breath. 

Armin spared a sidelong glance at me. “Well I would say that I don’t think you’ll see him again, but I’d be lying especially given the fact that he just showed up here. He didn’t look at the menu at all and the way he walked in here seemed like this was far from his first time. Considering how much we like to meet up here, I’m actually surprised that we haven’t run into him before. He’s obviously a regular.”

“Damn it. I really liked this café too.” 

You know what, screw it. I’ve been going here for years and no one makes a nice mocha like these guys. 

“You know what, Satan can go fuck himself, I was here first.”

“I had a feeling you would say that. You’ve always been stubborn."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chapters will start getting longer, but Since I wrote the first and second chapters at the same time, they're both relatively short.
> 
> Hunter X Hunter


	3. Going Beyond The Impossible!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Go beyond the impossible" -Gurren Lagann
> 
> It's only a matter of time before Eren and Levi bump into each other again. This chapter will also include more lovely chats with Armin because I love him and Eren would be completely lost without him. The second part of the chapter includes a lot of 'about' Armin, Eren, and Mikasa.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooooo no T-shirts this chapter but they will be making a reappearance soon. All of the character references are linked to a picture (Carefully selected from the wide database of google by yours truly) if you don't know who they are.  
> I included about 7 different anime in this chapter that are all listed at the bottom in the end notes. This chapter is pretty long too so enjoy. ↁ‿ↁ 
> 
> Warning:  
> The Link for Death note is actually/might be a (tiny) bit of a spoiler for anyone who hasn't watched death note because there are a few extra lines in the clip. If you haven't watched it (yet?) feel free to not click on it....yeah

I had to admit, I was a little surprised. I had come across Satan twice in one week and was certain that by mid-September I would be dead for sure, but here I was, still alive and September was nearly done. It had been almost a month since my incredibly horrible encounter with that scary guy, and I had honestly completely stopped thinking about him altogether. When I had made my declaration of war against Satan in front of Armin, I was expecting some big test to happen that would be an assessment of my resolve. Not right after I said the words, though. Like if the guy had popped up right behind me as soon as I finished saying that I was ready for him, I probably would’ve freaked the fuck out and fallen off my chair. 

Yet it had been relatively peaceful. I had struck some serious luck. Classes were going well, Mikasa was happy too, I hadn’t heard from Grisha since the beginning of summer, but apparently he was alive. The old man was off somewhere in Europe doing research with all these big name science dudes. 

Basically life was good. So I figured Satan had either taken a vacation or wasn’t interested in killing me. I wasn’t complaining. 

Most importantly the café was still my safe haven. 

That’s right  _Mine_.

And that’s exactly why, once again, Armin and I were headed there. It was Saturday, which meant I would be doing absolutely nothing, and that I would be spending at least two hours of that nothingness talking to my best friend. Texting wasn’t good enough; I deserved quality time with his adorable face, and I refused to Skype someone who lived ten minutes away. That would be absolutely ridiculous. I had offered Armin a ride too, since Mikasa didn’t need the car today.

For some reason pulling into the parking lot of Café Rose and only seeing a few cars always made me happy. I loved when there were only a few people inside, not empty, but far from full. Walking in, I saw two familiar faces behind the counter. Another plus. 

“Yo Jaeger. Hey Armin.”

Jean and Marco had been working here for a while and they were both pretty cool. Sure Jean started out as a total asshole, but we’d sorted out our differences, or rather our similarities…To be honest our relationship was a little like [Rin and Bon](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/18/8e/23/188e236c4be51b8fba7d1c920f6dc11a.jpg) from [Blue Exorcist](http://myanimelist.net/anime/9919/Ao_no_Exorcist), where we totally hated each other in the beginning and then ended up becoming pretty close friends. All the petty dares included of course. 

And let’s be honest, in our relationship Jean is Bon. I totally call dibs on Rin Okumura. Why? Because he’s like the coolest guy ever! Even after he finds out that he’s a demon, he swears to use his powers to kill all the other demons and save humanity. He’s my kinda guy.

Marco is on a totally different level. Marco is more like a modern day [Rock Lee](http://dl3.glitter-graphics.net/pub/386/386173i2nx0ig065.jpg) with freckles. I mean Marco's adorable and honest, but he always sticks up for his friends. His parents made him take up Karate at a young age because he seemed timid and they wanted him to have some self-confidence. In basic terms, the kid was a second-degree black belt and could hand you your ass on a silver platter if he wanted to. But he would never do that unless it was well deserved. Marco was calm and always level headed. He really is an exceptional human being. Plus he compliments Jean nicely. He helps calm him down and keep him out of fights.

(There was a time when Marco broke his arm and leg at the same time. He was told that he probably would never be able to do martial arts again or any sports because of his leg, but Marco had a stubborn streak to him and when he had his mind set on recovery no one could stop him. And here he was: strong and capable, yet honest and kind.)

They haven’t officially hooked up yet, but it’s only a matter of time. If Jean isn’t head over heals for Marco, then I'm Pikachu.

Armin and I ordered and took our seats at the usual table while Jean started making our drinks. There was a comfortable hum of conversation around us that only made the café feel more  inviting.

Jean called my name and gestured to the beverages on the counter. I offered to get both our drinks and went to the counter. What I didn’t realize was that Armin had been a little shit and ordered a rather large pastry. Gee thanks for telling me, Armin. Now I have to make two trips. He takes advantage of my kindness I swear. I put Armin’s things in front of him with a small bow and he offered a sweet “Thank you” innocently. Curse him and his adorableness; it’s not fair. However, my mind immediately brightened by an epiphany. 

Jean and Marco were working today. That meant Armin and I got free refills! Perks of being me. Life is wonderful.

Smiling, I made my way back to the table once more, holding my own beverage. 

I must have looked so positively beautiful that the ground wanted to get a closer look at my dazzling smile, because all of the sudden it was rushing towards my face. 

And God hates me. All the Gods ever, hate me. Any God that any person has ever come up with was created with ‘hates Eren Jaeger’ at the bottom of their description. Every single one of them. All the beautifulness of life was wiped away in an instant, because as I looked up to try and gather my bearings, after a rather shameful display of clumsiness, I was met with steel grey eyes. Angry steel grey eyes. The eyes that haunted my nightmares because no dream was scary enough. 

My mind was jolted out of terror by the sound of Armin calling my name with a mixture of slight concern and ample amusement. It was a sound that I recognized, which helped. I got off my knees quickly and tried to hide my embarrassment. I was starting to sweat, my cheeks were definitely red, and my hands felt clammy. I brushed my hands on my pants in an attempt to get the sweat off…I wiped both my hands….which were both free….sooo not holding anything…

The gears in my head were slowing turning and I knew something was horribly,  _horribly_ wrong. I figured it out and soon wish I hadn’t. Any mortification I had quickly turned to absolute terror. I had seen a pair of angry grey eyes and my drink was no longer in my hand…which meant….

I gulped and fought the growing urge I had to flee. Not that fleeing would be a bad idea; I just was never one to run away. So I looked death in the face. And boy, was he pissed.

So God hates me. Satan hates me too. If Satan didn’t hate me before, he definitely did now.

There was a very large stain of what I assumed was a rather piping hot café mocha, on what sure looked like very expensive pants, which were on the legs of someone who was definitely Satan. 

I don’t know how long I was standing there staring at him with the same horrified expression, but it felt like time had stopped the moment I tripped over my own two feet.

Why was it that normally I’m a perfectly average person with basic coordination skills, then all of the sudden, I’m clumsier than the male protagonist of any Harem Ecchi Anime ever. But because I’m Eren fucking Jaeger, instead of landing in the lap of some hot babe, (or on her breasts [as it usually goes](http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--Bz3LIaAK--/c_fit,fl_progressive,q_80,w_636/18n5qthp09pwzjpg.jpg), but hey I’m gay, can I get the lap of a hunk? No!) I fall into Satan!

“You. You fucking shit-stain of a brat. What the fuck is your Goddamn problem?” 

The voice itself wasn’t that loud, but for some reason it scared me even more shitless than if he had yelled at me. 

“Answer the fucking question, you dumbass. How can one person be so fucking clumsy and absolutely clueless about their own fucking surroundings?”

I couldn’t move. I definitely couldn’t speak either. My mouth was completely dry and my legs felt like they would give out. 

I was pulled out from my trance by a burst of laughter coming behind me, and someone yelling “Yo Jaeger, you okay over there? That looked like a pretty nasty trip; I’d rate it an eight point five outta 10. A ten out of ten would be you tripping into a garbage can.” In a normal situation, I would’ve turned to Jean and told him to shut the fuck up and attached some rude name like “fucking Horse Face” at the end, but trust me this wasn’t a laughing matter.

Marco, on the other hand, rushed over to help me. He was such a saint; and I swear, to my eyes, he was practically glowing.

 He took one look at my face and realized something was off. Anyone would be embarrassed about tripping and spilling their drink everywhere, but petrified? No. Looking at the man in front of me, Marco quickly deduced what had happened and immediately addressed (Satan) the costumer I had just spilled my drink all over. 

The words Marco said to him drifted through my head without me hearing them. Honestly I was too busy praying for Marco to find the golden words to make everything better than to bother actually listening to what he said. In the end it wasn’t Marco who calmed him down, but a man who came up behind Satan- who had risen out of his seat at some point- and put his hand on his shoulder. My brain decided to zoom back to the present and listen to the words coming from the new person. I was in time to catch, “We know it was an accident and he was just angered because the coffee was hot. It wasn’t the boy’s fault and he sure looks to me like he’s very sorry.”

Marco was nodding, “Yes and if Eren could go back in time I’m sure he would’ve been much more careful!”

That little comment had Satan clenching his teeth and saying, “If this brat could go back in time, I hope there would be _multiple_ things that he would be more careful to avoid.” 

The venomous remark came crashing down on me like a brick wall. First the ice cream, now the coffee. I had really struck gold with this guy.

Despite all the anger I could still feel emanating off of Satan’s body, it seemed that he had calmed down a lot from his initial reaction to what I had done. Whatever ‘new guy’ had said worked well to dissipate Satan’s rage. If Marco was a saint, this guy was an angel with a silver tongue.

As I came fully back to reality, I finally looked at angel man’s face. And the very first thought that came to mind was, _Dear Lord, Feitan brought[ Phinks](https://40.media.tumblr.com/be94544b49f2e3b3c4897f34f2012cfa/tumblr_nqa5744wgN1unslg2o1_500.png)!_ But apparently this Phinks was a good guy, so whatever! I didn’t care anymore. Thank you Phinks; I never really liked you, but right now you’re my hero! 

While I was analyzing Phinks’ face, Armin materialized by my side. Armin was as quick with his words as ever upon entering the scene.

“I’m really sorry sir, it’s actually my fault that Eren was in such a hurry to get back to the table, which is why he tripped. If I had gone to help him get the orders, Eren wouldn’t have had to make two trips in the first place, and wouldn’t have let down his guard while holding something hot.”

Phinks and Feitan both turned their attention towards Armin. Between his words and his adorable face, I could see that I was pretty much forgotten. Phinks especially looked quite pleasantly taken aback by the blonde. My best friend had somehow managed to combine the innocence and charm of [Honey-senpai](http://fe867b.medialib.glogster.com/media/91/91c8d42179f4e3c05707e16d8c5390f81bfc76c8365f93524cf3140f8082636e/4-jpg.jpg) ([x](http://myanimelist.net/anime/853/Ouran_Koukou_Host_Club)) with the grace [Queen Serenity](http://orig03.deviantart.net/5d8d/f/2007/344/8/a/queen_serenity_by_thebitterlegion.png) ([x](http://myanimelist.net/anime/530/Bishoujo_Senshi_Sailor_Moon)) to create an all-powerful spell of enchantment. He had made many a poor human fall slave to him by using his mastery of this technique. 

It was scary. Not like _Satan scary_ , but like a ‘dude that’s not normal’ kind of scary.

Weird or not, I was still grateful to Armin for using his ultimate move in order to help me. All of my friends really. Even Jean—who was still laughing his ass off behind the counter—would’ve been the first to join my side had a physical fight broken out. He was never too good with the verbal stuff anyway.

Jean soon remembered that he was actually being paid to do shit, and grabbed a mop to clean up the mess I had made on the floor. Unfortunately, there wasn’t much that could be done to help Satan’s pants. If it wasn’t for Phinks holding onto Satan’s arm, I’m sure the guy would’ve slugged me one. Hard. 

Phinks shot one last look towards me, “I assume that you are repentant for your actions?”

“Sir I am so incredibly sorry, I don’t know what’s wrong with me. If there’s anything I can do…” I let my voice trail off as Phinks waved his hand. It was obvious what Satan wanted me to do. Right now his eyes were basically screaming ‘ _Die a painful death so horrible that even your greatest enemies will pity you. But I won’t, because I’m not your enemy, I’m your worst nightmare!’_

Phinks smiled, seemingly satisfied with my answer, and shook his head. He grabbed Satan and walked straight out of Café Rose without a backwards glance.

He was kind of admirable.

So much for life being nice and calm. This was what I deserved, though, for prematurely congratulating myself on having gotten grey-eyed Satan out of my life. I had jinxed myself and I had jinxed myself hard. Not only had I gotten Satan back in my life today, he was more pissed than ever. Now I just hoped that we would never ever ever be alone in a room together, because he would definitely take the opportunity to kill me. I slumped down into the café chair across from Armin—who had already returned to his seat—and knocked on the wooden table in front of us.

“What was that for?”

“Knock on wood,” was all I could manage. I felt completely exhausted. I decided that looking being frightened took up way too much emotional energy.

“Wow. If you can think of a future situation that would be worse than what just happened, then maybe you should knock on wood a few more times. And by the way,” he continued, giving me a look as he considered my current state, “I call driving home.”

“But we took my car, how will you get home?”

“I’ll just crash at yours silly. It’s not that unusual anyway.”

“Can’t argue with that.”

“Wanna get out of here?”

“Very much, yes.”

And with that, we left the café and headed back to my apartment, where I decided I would stay forever. I could become an Otaku. A true Otaku. Like someone that never leaves their room, and survives on potato chips alone. Although, it has become increasingly difficult for me to eat potato chips—it had become a habit after watching [Death Note](http://myanimelist.net/anime/1535/Death_Note) that I would dramatically hold up a chip and declare, [“I’ll take a potato chip...and eat it!!!!”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KC6T3_O2iWc)

This would of course lead to maniacal laughter and my sister telling me that I was an idiot.

Yeah…so… potato chips were a no go...

But real Otakus don’t need chips! Real Otakus eat ramen and pocky sticks. And rice balls. I could do that…But then I would get fat. UGH Damn it! 

~

Mikasa hadn’t been the least bit surprised to come home and find Armin and I passed out on the couch together. She had covered the two of us with a blanket and shut off the TV, before going to bed herself. 

And that’s exactly how I woke up in the morning. Snuggled with Armin on the couch under a big fuzzy blanket. It was always a struggle to detach from Armin in the morning because of his habit of latching onto whatever was next to him as he slept. For a scrawny blonde kid, he really held on tight too. It took way too much energy to pry his arms off and walk to the kitchen for coffee.

After the events that happened yesterday, I just wanted to sit at home and do nothing, but the world was still a cruel place.

“Morning Mika,” I mumbled at the sight of my sister sitting at the kitchen table drinking her morning dose of caffeine and reading the paper.

“Morning Eren,” she replied barely shifting her eyes off the paper. “Do you have class today?” 

“Yeah, but not ‘til noon, and it’s still pretty early,” I said as I poured myself my own cup of coffee.

“Well you should probably get Armin up and ask if he has any.”

“Oh shit. You’re right.”

“Mmmhmm."

I hauled ass to the couch and set the mug down before vigorously shaking Armin to wake him up. The only word I said to him once he opened his baby blue eyes was “class.” 

He shot up like a rocket and started scrambling around getting his things together, muttering curse words.

 And there it was. He transformed into the stereotypical Shojo anime girl who was completely late for school. He grabbed a [piece of toast](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rnQBF2CIygg) and everything. (Which, in my opinion, must have been on purpose because no one actually does that.)

It was always humorous to hear Armin swear. Mostly because what he considered curse words usually turned out to be ‘You offspring of a smelly cow’ and said in a foreign language. He knew like seven fluently after all. I was losing track. Though why he felt the need to speak all those different languages would always baffle me. Sure it was cool, but sometimes I wondered if his brain just ever ran out of storage room.

Armin attended Maria University, known for its biological sciences, while Mikasa and I attended the Sina Institute of Art and Design in the opposite direction. It wasn’t far from the apartment, so we were lucky. Since Annie had a car, she would drive Mikasa to school sometimes. They had met at college and quickly became friends. The number of classes they shared also helped speed up the process.

The only big difference between the two girls was that Mikasa had gotten a full ride, due to her involvement and talent in sports as well as her overall academic achievements. She had inherited the best parts of both my parents even though she wasn’t blood related. Art came from my mother’s side. In my mind, having this gift from my mother was better than anything else I could have asked for, and I managed to land myself at a good school doing something that I liked. Even Armin, who was commuting from home, had gotten everything he wanted. His mad genius skills had gotten him crazy scholarships too. Even though he didn’t get a full ride, he was paying pretty much nothing for college. His plans were to go on to medical school and become a neurologist. Armin had always been fascinated by the human brain. 

As for me, I liked art a lot more than science. I hadn’t gotten any kind of scholarship, but it wasn’t a problem. Even though my dad wasn’t around and spent all his time working, he also paid for all of my schooling and anything that we needed. To be honest, we were all pretty content with how things were. 

Mikasa worked at a department store that she really loved.  Her primary focus in school was fashion design and she figured that working in a clothing store could only help her. She also had an internship at a high-end fashion magazine owned by some big shot named Darius Zackly. The guy was pretty much a walking legend that was made of money, but I didn’t really care all too much. I just hoped that Mikasa didn’t run into any problems. 

She had been hired as the Editorial Assistant Intern and her superior was a woman named Nifa an editor. Mikasa had met the editor-in-chief a few times too, whose name was Hanji Zoë. After their first few meetings, Mikasa had declared that she liked her. From the descriptions Mikasa gave me, the woman seemed pretty eccentric, but I guess it’s always good to be excited about your job.

Since Mikasa was working today too, I would be left to fend for myself as far as dinner went. I made a mental note to go grocery shopping later.

The rest of the day went by pretty fast, and I was rather proud of the dinner I had cooked up. I made enough for Mikasa naturally, but she wouldn’t be home anytime soon so I decided to stick her plate in the refrigerator and let her warm it up. The way she always praised my cooking made me really happy. Not that I would ever admit it though. It was nice to know that I could do something to help her out after all she always does for me to save my ass. She's also a great ass-kicker when it comes to getting me motivated to actually do my work. 

After spending a few hours wasting time on my laptop, I decided to call Armin to just talk because what else was there to do? I also decided that I should call him out for that piece of toast this morning. Because seriously, no one does that! 

Somehow this was taken as an insult and Armin hit right where it hurts.

“Well Eren, No one is clumsy enough to spill rainbow-sprinkled ice cream and a cafè mocha on the same guy! I mean, he wanted to kill you originally after the Ice cream incident, which speaks volumes about how he must feel after the mocha.”

“Gee thanks for bringing that up again Armin. You’re the best. Like if I had to pick my favorite mean person, you’ve officially got [Kyoya](http://orig07.deviantart.net/551c/f/2015/098/f/1/death_note__kyoya_ootori_x_male_reader__by_xxdarknymphxx-d8ozhco.jpg) beat.” 

“Hmph. Though speaking of yesterday….” He trailed off leaving me to groan.

“Are we really going to talk about yesterday?”

“Not about yesterday, no. But about someone involved in yesterday.”

“Well it’s not Satan, ‘cause you wouldn’t have this kind of a lead-in if it was so….wait I got it! Angel-man!”

"Dear God Eren, Angel-man?!" His voice was practically dripping with judgement, and it was totally unfair. That guy had saved me from Satan, which made him an angel. It was perfectly logical.

"For the record, my first impression of the man, that I assume you want to talk about, was that he was an angel. If you would like to know my second impression, I'll tell you, but only if you want me to."

"Go for it. Lemme hear it."

I smirked, "Phinks." 

"Wait what?" Obviously my answer wasn't something he was expecting.

"My second reaction was 'OMG Feitan brought Phinks' because that was what it looked like to me." Armin burst out laughing. 

"Eren, he doesn't look anything like Phinks!"

"He's blonde and big, it counts. But I think it might have been the suit"

"That doesn't count at all!!! He looked like Captain America if anything."

"Hmmmm, way to be, Armin. Normal humans aren't good enough, you have to go for super heroes." I could virtually hear Armin's blush through the phone as he stuttered to come up with some kind of excuse.

Armin, adorable, evil, genius Armin was blushing and grasping for words. It was almost too much to bear.

"Damn Armin, I haven't heard you like this since your first crush in high school. I'm gonna die if you keep this up."

"Eren!"

"Nope I'm pretty content, ‘cause it's been you teasing me for a while now. Well the tables have turned my friend." Calling Armin really had been a good move. I almost saw yesterday as a good thing if Armin was gonna be like this. Almost. That was the best I could get it. 

"Hey it's not my fault, that man was super hot!"

"Okay Armin. Too bad you didn't get his name. Sorry man."

I was met by silence on the other end of the line.

"Holy shit! You got his name and number? How the hell did you pull that off???"

"I didn't say anything about his number." Armin mumbled. He was all embarrassed over the attention, but at the same time he was really happy.

"Yeah you didn't say anything about his number, but you totally got it, didn't you?" Now I was getting excited too. Not carried away, just excited. 

The reply was faint and I almost felt like I might have gotten too excited and scared Armin. "He slipped me his business card." He murmured.

"Ooooohhh" I cooed over the phone. "So...does he have a nice name? If it's something stupid, I'm going to laugh my ass off. I'll console you afterwards of course, but I'll have to get the laughs out of the way."

“His name is Erwin Smith.”

“Erwin….Ehh that’s not too bad. I mean Smith is a pretty normal last name, and I don't know any anime characters named Erwin, so I can’t really make any good insults. Can you picture yourself moaning ‘Erwin’ during sex?”

“EREN!!!” Armin screamed. It really hurt my ear, but the reaction was wonderful, so I regretted nothing other than the fact that I couldn’t see his face.

“Hey Armin, I’m just saying.”

“You’re such a perv!”

“I prefer the term Hentai, but thank you.”

“Loser. Anyway the point is, I googled him.” This kinda piqued my interest. Armin had used the almighty Google on someone, and from Armin’s tone of voice, it had obviously delivered some pretty interesting results. 

“Alrighty Armin, let’s hear it. Shoot.”

In a professional manner, Armin quoted the page he was looking at to me: “'Erwin Smith is the Managing Director of Recon Corps Fashion Magazine. He is 27 years old, and has been the Managing Director for two years. His incredible act of achieving this position at such a young age can be accredited to his exceptional business skills, which are widely known. Smith has been a key element to the success of Recon Corps, along with…' and then the article just goes off and lists a few other people who are the current Art Director, Editor-in-Chief, Copy Chief, top models and designers.”

I whistled into the phone. “This guy sounds like a real hot shot.” 

“Didn’t you say that Mikasa works at Recon Corps?”

“Yeah she’s got an internship there. She’s met the Editor-in-Chief a few times too; her name is Hanji Zoë, if I remember correctly.”

“Uh huh, thought so. This article has some stuff about Hanji too. Apparently she’s pretty young as well, and super good at what she does. It mentions Zackly at the bottom, ‘cause he’s the one that owns the magazine, but I don’t recognize any of the other names on here."

“I probably wouldn’t either. Hold on a minute, I’m gonna look up this guy’s salary.” Luckily my computer was still in front of me, so I got it out of sleep mode and pulled up a Google page. As soon as I started typing Erwin, Erwin Smith popped right up. Typing in ‘salary,’ I clicked on the first thing that came up.

"Oh fuck….” I breathed.

"Yeah...."  We sat in silence for a little bit. But of course, I was the first one to break it.

"DAAAAAMN Armin!!! Fuck the super heroes, you landed yourself a millionaire! How did you do that? No, forget that, I know exactly how you did it—with your Armin-prism-power thing."

"Eren...did you just reference..Sailormoon?"

"Of course not. You completely misheard me. So have you called him? Was there a little message on the back of card saying 'hi cutie I wanna meet you for coffee, call me,' because that would be hilarious.” I was shooting words out like rapid fire at this point. 

"No. And Eren, stop making him sound like a sugar daddy."

"But Armin, it's Erwin fucking Smith!" I was borderline giddy.

"You know Eren, there is one important detail about all of this that you seem to be forgetting." 

"Oh? And what's that? If it's some bull shit about how you can't date him cuz he's too good for you, I'll kick your ass and get Mikasa to join me for good measure."

"One, No. And two, pretty please no. Not that I think Mikasa would be able to bring herself kick me. Anyway, that's all besides the point." He seemed really serious, so I let my giddy mood slip and returned to calm. "Eren, Erwin freaking Smith was sitting at the same table as the guy that you’ve _stabbed_ with a chocolate vanilla twist and _doused_ with steaming mocha!”

Have I ever mentioned that Armin really had a way with words?

The world suddenly came crashing down on me as I realized the full effect of what Armin always saying. 

Satan might have the power (money) to literally end me. I hoped to God that the only thing he knew about me was my face.

I mean at least he didn’t know my name. Or….

“Hey umm Armin….He doesn’t know my name right?”

Silence.

“Armin?” My voice was pleading. 

“Well…” his voice was timid. “He definitely knows your first name. Unless he’s either deaf, or completely ignored everything both Marco and I said. I mean, I know I used your name when I referred to you. Not your full name, so I’m sure you’re fine. After all, there’s got to be a bunch of other people named Aaron around here.”

“But if he looked hard enough, knowing my face would allow him to narrow it down…"

“Mmmm yeah, but look on the bright side, maybe he was too busy thinking up ways to kill you than actually listening to either me or Marco. Which means he doesn’t know your name. He also doesn’t know where you live”, Armin rambled, “because they left the café before us, so they didn’t follow us home. Even though it’s possible that it was a ploy to get us to drop our guard and go straight home, I don’t think you have to worry about that, because Satan doesn’t seem like the type of person to sit in wet pants for extended periods of time, even if said wet pants do smell like mocha.”

“Lucky me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> References:  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XcheS787jcI
> 
> Blue exorcist (Rin Okumura and Sugoro "Bon" Ryuuji)  
> Naruto (Rock Lee)  
> Hunter X Hunter (Phinks: another Phantom Troupe member)  
> Ouran Highschool host club (Honey-senpai and Kyoya Ootori)  
> Sailor Moon [Queen Serenity (and moon prism power)]  
> Death Note (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KC6T3_O2iWc )  
> ....I swear I don't do that with my potato chips....ever.....⊙﹏⊙
> 
> I went back in and added that link to the piece of toast AMV because I had to. i love Bakaoppai and it was definitely necessary.  
> once again tell me if any of the links don't work.


	4. Promises

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Promises shouldn't be made lightly." -Gintoki 
> 
> Eren has been absolutely swamped with school work and his stress levels have been at max. After he hands in his work Mikasa decides that it warrants a small celebration. She invites him out for drinks and to meet her two friends that work with her in the department store.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to start out by apologizing for how consistently terrible the chapter summaries have been. It just kinda happens ┐(-｡ｰ;)┌ 
> 
> Also thank you to my beta who laughs at all my jokes and fixes the random shit I do because I'm insane.  
> （｡≧◇≦）ﾉ so it's also her fault if you don't find this humorous
> 
> Reference index at the bottom. (last chapter was in order of appearance and it seems that's what I'm going with)  
> Also instead of me taking up all this space at the bottom telling you what each anime is about, I inserted links to myanimelist.net which gives a little blob, the cover picture, and a list of main characters ヾ(o✪‿✪o)ｼ  
> I'm going to go back and fix the first couple chapters and update some of my notes.

Instant coffee. 57mg of caffeine per 8 fl. oz.

Brewed Coffee 163mg of caffeine per 8 fl. oz.

I hadn’t slept in two days and this magical drink was the only thing sustaining me. Brewed coffee is my shit. And Mikasa is the most amazing sister in the world. Bless her soul, I’d die without her. Knowing how much work I had, she’d been refilling my rather large mug of coffee and giving me water to keep me from collapsing from dehydration before the sleep depravation got to me. Sure, all the coffee had been making me pee like that fucking fountain in Ouran High School Host Club([v](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yDwtpFGkUGQ)), but I was still awake and that meant that I was doing something right. My body was on the verge of collapsing—which was a little sad because I’d gone a lot more than two days without sleep before—but I was almost done. I’d finally reached a good point to stop; I’d have to put on the finishing touches tomorrow, but for now I could sleep.

I was in the process of starting the 8th week of school. Now usually that doesn’t mean much to me, but this year it meant that the deadline to submit my proposal for my final project was fast approaching. This project would be 75% of my grade and would take fucking forever to complete. During the past few weeks I had completed character model sheets, all of my character rotations, my expression model sheet, and an entire damn storyboard. The worst part was that all of this damn work was only for my 2D animation III Class. So I’d been juggling this crap with all of my other work. All the stress was really starting to build up.

But we were so close to being done.

~

Twenty-four hours later I collapsed onto my bed. It was probably around noon.

 Done. We were completely done. Finally. 

I had submitted my part yesterday, but we had to do some final touch-ups to make sure that everything was perfect, and since there were other animators in the group I had to collaborate with them. I had also finally finished a piece to submit to another class I was taking to fulfill my “Life Drawing” requirement. 

Everything was finally handed in.

Sleep.

Right now…sleep.

~ 

I awoke to my pillow vibrating. 

I groaned and fumbled around to get whatever accursed thing was buzzing out from beneath my head. Blinking at my phone, it took my eyes a few seconds to adjust to the light. 

I had a few new text messages from Mikasa and one from Armin. I read Mikasa’s first because I had a feeling I already knew what Armin’s would say.

[Mikasa]: Hey I left water on your desk before I left for my shift.

[Mikasa]: Text me when you wake up.

And the most recent:

[Mikasa]: Hey Eren, if ur up Ik u could use a relxr. After closing up the store we’re gonna head out for drinks. Ik u finally finished ur work so u should join us to unwind. Isabel and Farlan also wanna meet u if ur up to it. We’re goin to the usual place. Store closes at the usual time which means u got two hours. Send me a text if ur comin so Ik to come get u. 

And that actually sounded pretty nice. 

[Eren]: I’m up Mika. I’ll come. I feel pretty well rested. 

It was 9 o’clock, which meant that I had slept pretty much the entire day. Not that I was surprised. Hopefully I didn’t look like one of the [zombies](https://keikakudoori.files.wordpress.com/2010/07/hotd-6.jpg) from High School of the Dead anymore. After a nice long shower I’d be good to go. I did actually need the three hours though. There was no way I was leaving the house with my room looking like this. I had some serious cleaning up to do and it smelled like shit.

I got to work right away. I wasn’t anywhere close to a neat freak, but I had my moments where I would transform into [Ryuugi](http://s12.photobucket.com/user/val1751/media/Toradora/toradora45.jpg.html) from [Toradora](http://myanimelist.net/anime/4224/Toradora!) and go all dirt-killer mode. 

When I was satisfied with the state of my room, I headed for the shower. 

It would be a little difficult to choose what to wear though. Normally, since we were going to the usual bar, I would just throw on a T-shirt and head out. But Mikasa was bringing some of her friends. They were definitely closer than mere coworkers; I could tell that she definitely liked Isabel and Farlan from how she talked about them. It wasn’t strange for her to hang out with them either, but I had never met them before and I didn’t want to give a bad impression. Or, you know, seem like a total loser. Who knows, maybe Farlan was super hot? (Not that Isabel might be not be hot it’s just…you know…)

I put on a T-shirt anyway. It wasn’t my Otaku [shirt](http://ih1.redbubble.net/image.29799065.8928/figtn,220x294,royal_blue,mens,ffffff.u1.jpg), so I figured it would be fine. Honestly, the bar wouldn’t exactly be brightly lit, and we were meeting up at 11pm, so did it make any sense for me to spend a lot of time deciding what to wear? No. No it did not. 

I put on my favorite skinny jeans and a light jacket.  Even if I left the jacket open, I doubted that anyone would know that I was wearing a Naruto [T](http://ih0.redbubble.net/image.35220342.4006/figtn,220x294,black,vneck,ffffff.u4.jpg) underneath. 

I grabbed my keys and phone then sat down on the couch to wait for Mikasa to arrive. I had purposely saved Armin’s text until now.

I couldn’t help but grin as I read it. I had been totally right on my guess earlier.

One Erwin Mc-hottie had invited Armin to spend his birthday with him last week. They had already met up once before that, but birthdays were special. Armin had been super nervous because he still didn’t know Erwin all that well so he had no idea what he could get him for his birthday. He had asked me for help, but promptly regretted it after all the suggestive comments I made. I think he ended up going with a small gourmet chocolate sampler. It was classy, but not too expensive. Dating a rich guy was tough.

Armin’s text included some highlights from their date as well as assurance that Erwin really liked his gift.

He had waited ‘til now to text me about something that happened a week ago because he knew that I was only leaving my room to go to class and the library. He didn't want to give me any kind of distraction while I was focused on school. 

I love my best friend. It almost hurt how considerate Armin could be.

I sent Armin a very long reply, including how happy I was that he had enjoyed himself. I ended with “Congratulations on your [Junjou Romantica](http://images4.fanpop.com/image/photos/15400000/Usagi-and-Misaki-funkyrach01-15439979-500-281.jpg)” ([x](http://myanimelist.net/anime/3092/Junjou_Romantica)) and added wedding bells to complete the remark.

I was still smiling when Mikasa arrived.

When we got to the bar, Mikasa led me to a table where a redheaded girl and a guy were already sitting. They immediately perked up when they noticed Mikasa, and she introduced me as we reached the table.

“This is my younger brother Eren. Eren this is Isabel and Farlan.”

As their names were said, each smiled warmly at me. 

It turned out that Isabel was a rather animated person. Like super, super animated. Like addicted to caffeine, bouncing off the walls, animated. I wasn’t even fully seated before she started off with questions. I didn’t really mind and I kind of liked her. She was very enthusiastic and a little random, but not in an annoying way. 

Mikasa looked as though she was really enjoying herself and when she laughed it was because she genuinely found the conversation funny, which definitely wasn’t something that happened very often. The way that Isabel spoke when she was telling a story was pretty captivating. She would use her entire body to explain things, waving her arms in the air to demonstrate her points. Farlan dodged her eccentric arm movements with practiced ease—(and I made a mental note to myself to beware her flinging hands in the event that I ever found myself seated next to her)—and occasionally inserted little jabs at Isabel in the conversation, that only served to heighten the friendly atmosphere. 

 I found myself relaxing before I knew it. Farlan and Isabel didn’t treat me like an outsider at all. It was nice. 

I took the opportunity to study them. Farlan seemed like a pretty cool guy. He was laid-back and calm, but also funny. He seemed like the kind of guy who was level head and focused when he was at work.

His hair was baffling though. It was a strange pale brown color. I think I would call it an ashy brown, but it almost looked grey. Paired with his grey eyes he was pretty attractive. He dressed simply, in a loose T-shirt and jeans. Not incredibly hot, but definitely attractive.

Isabel was almost the opposite; completely energetic and headstrong. She seemed stubborn, but didn’t get upset when Farlan or Mikasa teased her about the stupid things that she did or the shitty situations that she managed to get herself into. 

She complemented the ashy color of Farlan’s hair with a beautiful, eccentric red. I laughed at my brain that loved colors so much; just analyzing their hair could keep me occupied for hours. I was really starting to wish that the lighting in the room was better so I could see the colors more clearly, but I’d have to wait. As Isabel turned towards me, I was able to see that her eyes were a bright green color. And honestly, I was a little surprised that she didn’t have any freckles.

Isabel was wearing a faux leather jacket that had the sleeves of a [grey hoodie](https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/41E%2Bwv3HQSL.jpg).  She was wearing a black [shirt](http://ih0.redbubble.net/image.68794645.5314/fig,black,tank,ffffff.u1.jpg) underneath with a green dragon on it. Something about the dragon looked familiar, but either due to the bad lighting, or my brain being stupid, I couldn’t recall it.   

I was quiet for a few minutes thinking. It came to me suddenly and I blurted, “Shenron!” without thinking. 

Me and my stupid brain.

Everyone at the table immediately turned their attention to me, as I started to blush furiously. I had absolutely no idea what the conversation had been about, but I could bet a billion dollars that it had nothing even vaguely to do with Shenron, or anything that could be compared to him. 

Mikasa burst out laughing as she tried to say, “You’ll have to go with it. He does that all the time.”

“Yeah sorry,” I managed to find my voice and explain myself. “It’s just that I was trying to think of what was on your shirt and I couldn’t tell what it was, but then it kinda hit me. Sorry, my filter is total shit.”

Isabel’s face dawned in realization as she glanced down at her shirt. “I totally forgot I was even wearing this! Wait, you know Shenron? So you’ve watched [Dragon Ball](http://myanimelist.net/anime/813/Dragon_Ball_Z)?!!!” She was practically jumping up and down in her chair.

“Oh no, now you’ve gotten her excited. You’ll be lucky if you can get away now,” Farlan said shaking his head.

I smiled and nodded to Isabel, “Yeah I did a few years back. I didn't watch all the movies because there are just so many, but the anime was pretty good. I used to watch it as a kid so I figured I should just finish it.”

“Oh my God, wait. So what else have you watched?”

At that, Mikasa snorted. “Everything!” She said with an exasperated sigh.

“Wait Eren, is that a Naruto shirt?”

“I’m a little surprised you recognized it.”

“Of course I did. That’s the symbol that appears on Naruto’s stomach.”

I nodded again

Isabel squealed.

“So does everything mean just the mainstream stuff like [Bleach](http://myanimelist.net/anime/269/Bleach) and [Narruto](http://myanimelist.net/anime/20/Naruto), or have you watched like..." She waved her hand flippantly as she tried to think of an anime that was more obscure. "I don't know [No. 6](http://myanimelist.net/anime/10161/No.6)?”

“Oh yeah I watched that only a few weeks ago. It was pretty short, so I ended up reading the manga too. [Shion and Nezumi](http://www.quizz.biz/uploads/quizz/322427/16_6ik7B.jpg) are such an adorable ship. Like unbelievably adorable.”

“Duh, of course! Oh my God, I’m so glad someone else agrees with me! Wow. I didn't think you would know that one. It's based of a Shounen Ai manga after all and not a lot of guys really ship M/M stuff.”

“Well, I am gay so it make sense for me to ship guys together. Especially when they’re so obviously meant for each other.”

Isabel gave me a nod of agreement.

“To be honest, Shion and Nezumi reminded me of [Yashiro and Kuroh](http://41.media.tumblr.com/975e179a6407d313311d1fdeb3905a33/tumblr_inline_noub40txBj1rog1ou_500.jpg) from [K-project](http://myanimelist.net/anime/14467/K) because they look so similar and I watched K-project first. Yashiro and Kuroh where pretty much begging to be shipped!” 

“They totally were!!! And [Allen Walker and Yuu Kanda](http://www.zerochan.net/118883) ([x](http://myanimelist.net/anime/1482/D.Gray-man)) had the same look as the other two couples. The white fluffy hair paired with long black hair.” ([p](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/3c/39/61/3c3961425bf5bb5ea2f92f1dae77e429.jpg))

We kept talking about anime for a while. She had just recently watched [Btooom!](http://myanimelist.net/anime/14345/Btooom!) and really liked it. We somehow started talking about [Full Metal Panic](http://myanimelist.net/anime/71/Full_Metal_Panic!) from there, which morphed into [Fullmetal Alchemist](http://myanimelist.net/anime/121/Fullmetal_Alchemist) of course. I told her that [Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood](http://myanimelist.net/anime/5114/Fullmetal_Alchemist:_Brotherhood) was one of my favorite anime of all time.

We both got completely carried away. Mikasa and Farlan didn’t seem to mind too much, I knew that Mikasa was used to me going off on tangents and from the looks of it, Farlan was pretty used to Isabel getting really excited about anime too. 

When we decided to call it a day Isabel and I exchanged numbers. 

“Sorry about getting so carried away.” I said to Farlan.

He shook his head, “Don’t bother apologizing Eren, Isabel had a really great time. To be honest she doesn’t hang out with too many people, I’m glad that you two got along.”

Farlan and Isabel’s relationship reminded me vaguely of my own relationship with Mikasa. 

“By the way, we were meaning to tell you guys,” Farlan addressed both Mikasa and I. “We’re planning on doing movie night on Friday. If that doesn’t work for you guys we can push it to Saturday though.”

Mikasa glanced my way. “What do you have on Friday?”

“I have Figure drawing and then a few classes later in the day. I don’t want to be the douche that fucks up all the plans though.” 

“No man, it’s totally fine! So Saturday works better for both of you?” 

We both nodded. 

“And Mikasa, you already know where our house is, so we’re all set.”

Isabel had been staring off in to space. She seemed to be deep in thought over something. She turned to me “You said figure drawing right? So are you an arts major?”

“Yeah, I’m majoring in 3D animation, but I have to fulfill my Life Drawing requirement so I’m doing Figure Drawing II this year. I’ve already done Figure drawing 1.”

I don’t know why, but Isabel was looking incredibly excited again. Mikasa and Farlan seemed pretty confused too.

“This is perfect!” She yelled loud enough to startle all three of us. “I need to text you about something later. Or better yet, can you do coffee tomorrow?”

I nodded, still a little confused.

“This is so great, I can’t believe my luck! I’ll text you later with a time and place. See you tomorrow Eren! Let’s go Farlan.”

With a shrug and an apologetic look thrown my way, Farlan followed Isabel out. Mikasa and I left shortly thereafter.

Isabel was true to her word and sent me a text with the time and place that she wanted to meet up. I dressed like I normally do, so no T’s today. It felt nice to dress down once in a while, but I really did prefer my button-ups with kakis or nicer jeans. Plus, since the weather was starting to get a little chillier, I could bust out some of my scarves and favorite sweaters, provided that Mikasa didn’t get to them first. I had some pretty nice jackets too, and I freaking love my vests. Those things are, excuse my French, some classy-ass motherfuckers. 

I met up with Isabel at a family restaurant. It was one of those small ones where you went up and ordered and then sat down. She was wearing the same jacket as yesterday with a [Darker than Black](http://myanimelist.net/anime/2025/Darker_than_Black:_Kuro_no_Keiyakusha) [T-shirt](http://www.redbubble.com/people/art-broken/works/7803048-howling-in-the-shadows?p=t-shirt&style=tank&body_color=black&print_location=front). As soon as we were both seated with our food Isabel got straight to the point. 

“So every year we all go to this annual Halloween party thing. As you’re probably aware, Halloween is in 16 days. I got this crazy awesome idea for a costume but the problem is that I’m seriously running out of time and I’m completely lacking in artistic talent.”

“Yeah, that is kinda pushing it. Actually, Halloween is in 16 days, so you have to have the costume done in 15 days and today counts as one.”

“Will you help me?” She clasped her hands together.

“Well, you have to show me or at least describe in extreme detail what you want, and I would need a sketchpad.”

“No problem.” She said as she reached for a bag and pulled out her phone. “I figured you would need a picture anyway so I already have it pulled up.”

She turned her phone so I could see. It was a picture of a beheaded bride in a bloody wedding dress holding her head in her arms.

“Ummm….so the top part is fake?”

“Yeah, and I’m pretty short so I think I can pull it off without the dress looking like it’s too tall and I won’t have to kneel down or anything. There are some instructions online that we can go off of.”

“Do you have a dress?”

“A friend of mine used a wedding dress as part of her costume a few years back, she said that it was a little torn, but that’s absolutely fine. Plus I already told her what I wanted it for and she’s fine with me ruining it. We just have to adjust it to my size. I’m picking it up on Sunday. So? Will you help me?”

I sighed. Could I pull it off in 15 days, yeah probably, but it would be tough and I would have to go over to her house almost every day to work on it. 

“Yeah I’d be glad to help you out.”

“REALLY?” she jumped up and hugged me, which was a little awkward with the table between us.

“Why are you so surprised? I’m a little hurt.”

“No, it’s just, I thought you would consider it a lost-cause because you don’t have enough time.”

“Don’t worry, I make my own costumes every year so I’m pretty good at it.”

“Wow all of them?”

“Well to be honest I usually do anime characters and it’s not like you can buy those costumes just anywhere. And sometimes it’s just easier to make things yourself so that they fit you properly.”

“You’re incredible!” She was staring at me wide-eyed like she had never seen a creature quite like an Eren Jaeger before.

“So when can we start?” I asked. When you’re pressed for time, the sooner the better.

“Uhhh I mean I’m not doing anything today….”

“Great! Let’s go.”

~

The drive to her house was pretty short. She drove ahead of me while I followed in my car.

She pulled up to a family home. I was a little shocked at how nice it was. I figured from the way they acted that she lived with Farlan, but I didn’t think they would be able to afford this kind of house even together.

When we got inside I didn’t have any time to admire the various things around the house as Isabel lead me through. I did notice that all the rooms I saw were incredibly clean though.

“Is it just you and Farlan here?”

“No, we live with our older brother too. He covers most of the expenses, you’ll meet him on Saturday for movie night!”

“I don’t want to be rude when I ask this, but I’m guessing that he isn’t blood related?” 

“No, none of us are. But I’ve always seen Farlan and Levi as my brothers.”

So his name was Levi. I scanned my brain looking for a Levi. The name seemed vaguely familiar, but I couldn’t place it, so I shrugged it off. At least it wasn’t Tom or something generic, then I would have to think of every single Tom that I knew and pray that it wasn’t that one dude I fucking hate. 

We stopped in a back room that had a whole bunch of supplies in it: materials, needles, thread, you name it. I let out a long whistle.

“Yeah I know, this is mostly because of Levi, he makes all his own costumes too and he’s really into fashion.” Isabel supplied. "Though he's been wearing the same fucking costume for the past three years." She grumbled under her breath.

“So… I hate to be the guy who asks obvious questions, but why didn’t you just ask him to help you?”

“Well lately he’s been super swamped with work and he seemed really stressed out. Honestly he’s been coming home completely exhausted. That was one of the reasons why Farlan and I wanted to have a movie night. He deserves some time to unwind.”

“Yeah I know the feeling, that’s why I went out to drink with you guys actually. Seems like it's been a shitty month all around.”

She nodded, “There is one other thing though.” She paused and shifted nervously on her feet. “I actually kind of wanted to surprise them. Farlan knows that it has something to do with a bride because I asked him to go dressed as a groom, but I haven’t showed him the design. I don’t even know, I just thought it would be cooler if they didn’t know about it ahead of time. If I can get at least one of them to shit their pants, I’ll be _ecstatic_. Most likely Farlan. That would be hilarious.” 

I couldn’t help laughing at Farlan’s expense. “Yeah, that’ll definitely be a lot easier to do if no one knows about it ahead of time. Although, is it okay if I ask Mikasa to come with me on the day of Halloween to help you put everything together? She’s absolutely phenomenal with makeup.” 

“Yeah that would be great!”

“Awesome. Do you have a sketchpad or really just a blank sheet of paper? I’d like to sketch out where we’re gonna cut the dress and how we want the arms. We should also make a list of accessories that we want. I have two friends that work at a thrift shop so we can get some used items if you don’t have any. Do you have a picture of the dress that I can work with?”

We worked together for an hour and a half. Even though we didn’t have the actual dress with us we got a lot of planning done so that as soon as we did have it we could get straight to work. I didn’t want to purchase all the accessories just yet. I wasn’t sure how reliable the pictures we had were, so I wanted to see the dress with Isabel and then make the final decision on the veil and bling.

  

After about another hour, Isabel and I were both pretty tired and happy to stop for the day. I promised to go shopping with her on Sunday as soon as we picked up the dress. Tomorrow was Friday and I had classes for the majority of the day. The day after that would be movie night. I sighed, I really had my weekend packed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ANIME  
> Ouran High School Host Club  
> High school of the dead  
> Toradora  
> Junjou Romantica (The english translation is "Pure Romance")  
> Dargon Ball (Shenron)  
> Naruto  
> Bleach  
> No. 6  
> K-project  
> D-gray man  
> Btooom!  
> Full Metal Panic  
> Fullmetal Alchemist (Brotherhood)  
> Darker Than Black
> 
> (I don't think the Ouran clip is a spoiler at all cuz...thats the first episode...surprise! that scene happens!)


	5. But It Was Me, Satan!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "But it was me Dio!" -Dio (Jojo's Bizarre Adventure)
> 
> Eren makes his way over to Farlan and Isabel's house. He's kind of looking forward to meeting Isabel's older brother too. (/*O*\\)
> 
> You Thought You were going to meet Isabel's cool older brother, BUT IT WAS ME, SATAN!  
> (Im sorry I really crack myself up)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So we all saw this coming right? I've actually been working up to this chapter so I'm pretty happy right now. I'm actually getting really excited to write the future chapters too especially because we're going to have a lot more Levi-Eren interaction and the whole "Eventual Levi/Eren" is going to become a lot more plausible. (❛ัॢᵕ❛ั ॢ)✩*ೃ.⋆ (*insert black star voice) YAHOO!!!  
> I may not have admitted this yet but...I definitely watch too much anime. Though truth be told I think Eren watches more than me....probably...(･･*)｡｡oＯ 
> 
> Thank you to my Beta, whom I love, even though she was feeling particularly lazy this week ;P

Mikasa is one of those people who insists on bringing some kind of dessert to people's houses when they invited you over. Now I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with that, but when you decide to bring a 'not so mini' dessert platter and a chocolate cake you’re pushing it a little. Did I mention that I had to carry everything? I swear my mouth offered to without my brain’s consent.

When I entered the house I was almost immediately attacked. A short girl with red hair was all I saw before I was spinning around on my feet trying to keep my balance and not drop anything. 

“Oh my god these look _Amazing_!”

“Isabel! Don’t eat those now! We’ll have dessert time later.” Farlan yelled from deeper inside the house.

Mikasa and I followed Isabel – who was fluttering around me trying to maintain a good view of the sweets that would soon fall victim to her appetite- into the family room where Farlan was already lounging on the large couch. Mikasa moved to join him as I carried the food to the kitchen with Isabel leading the way. She was looking chipper, as usual, sporting a [My Neighbor Totoro](http://myanimelist.net/anime/523/Tonari_no_Totoro) [T-shirt](http://ih1.redbubble.net/image.24886019.6503/ra,relaxed_fit,x3104,navy,front-c,600,650,900,850-bg,f8f8f8.1u2.jpg) that fit loosely and her usual smile. 

"Right in there." She pointed to an open doorway that I remembered from the last time I was here.

 Upon entering the kitchen, I noticed that someone else was already in the room. He wore a snug black V-neck and black skinny jeans. His black hair was styled in an undercut. He stood facing the microwave, heating up what I guessed was popcorn. His all black appearance contrasted with the all white kitchen. Everything was immaculately clean, from the marble counter tops to the white floor. It was so white and clean it reminded me of [14th's room](http://www.gaiaonline.com/guilds/viewtopic.php?t=19680517).

I assumed this was Isabel's older brother that she had mentioned. Not gonna lie, the guy was pretty hot. From the back at least. He definitely worked out.

"When you're done staring at me, feel free to put the desserts on the island."

His voice jarred me and I almost dropped the cake that was in my right hand. I quickly put it on the island as he had said before something else could surprise me into actually dropping one of the desserts.

His voice was hot too. Fuck.

Although something about it seemed....

I couldn't place it. 

He knew I had been staring at him, which was a little embarrassing. I was contemplating what to do next when he turned around to actually face me.

It's a good thing I put the desserts down.

"Oh _Fuck_ me” with a fucking purple dildo because my life is a disaster. 

“Well, I’ll be damned.” 

It was _him._ I had just been eyeballing Satan. I was in the same house as Satan. I had become friends with Satan’s younger….. _!_

No No No No No No NO! 

He couldn’t be Levi. That was fucking impossible. It was impossible for one person to be so incredibly unfortunate. No fuck that, that wouldn’t be misfortune, it would be downright Hell. What did I ever do to deserve this?

“Wait, what’s your name?” Don’t say Levi. Don’t say Levi. Please, I am begging you, pick any other name, just don’t say Levi.

“What, so you can masturbate to me?” 

Well fuck. Of all the people to catch me checking them out. Of all the people for me to be fucking _checking out_. WHAT WAS WRONG WITH ME?

“No, so I can write it in my Death Note!”

“Your What?”

“Nevermind. Just answer the question!”

“Not in your fucking life.”

“This is such a fucking mess. Fuck it. Why the hell are you even here?” PLeeeeeaaaassssseeeee don’t.

“Because I fucking live here, you dumbass constipated little shit. Now, why don’t you tell me why the fuck you’re in _my_ fucking house?”

SHIT! 

“Why the fuck did you have to turn out to be Levi?” Please call me a dipshit and say that isn’t your name.

This seemed to take him by surprise because he quickly became even more pissed. He walked towards me and grabbed the front of my shirt.

“How the Fuck do you know my name?” He was glaring directly into my face.

Isabel chose this exact moment to enter the kitchen  “Levi what’s going on? I thought I heard...” she trailed off and looked at Levi and me. He released my shirt and stepped away.

Dammit! So this dude was definitely Levi. Fucking Fantastic.

Why?

“Isabel it appears that I already know your older brother,” I said through gritted teeth, still staring back at Levi.

“Oh really that’s gr-“ she cut herself off. “or not so great apparently.” She finished in a soft voice.

 There were a few seconds of silence until her eyes widened and her face paled. She glanced quickly between Levi and me once more before she burst out, “NO! No No NO! Eren You promised!”

Yes. Yes, I did.

I promised I would help her with her costume.

I’d never gone back on a promise before. But both Isabel and I knew that had I been aware this man was her older brother, I would have never agreed to help her. This was a fucking disaster. How the hell do I let myself get caught up in this kind of shit?

“Eren?” Her voice was pleading. It was Levi’s turn to stare at the two people in front of him. His eyes moved from my face to Isabel’s pleading one and back. Eyes boring into mine.

I sighed and turned to face her, “Don’t worry I’ll keep my promise.”

She exhaled and dropped her head into her hands before muttering, “Thank God.”

“But,” I continued. And her head shot back up. I turned my gaze toward Levi, “This is uhh definitely going to complicate things.”

She nodded. She seemed to understand that I would help her and that it would be in her best interest to keep Levi and me away from each other.

“Okay.”

“Complicate what exactly?” Levi asked with his arms crossed. His eyes dared me to say something wrong.

Oh, this was going to be fun.

To be honest, I was a little curious about how he would react if I said something ridiculous—like, “Isabel and I are going out!”

There would probably be an explosion that could put [anything](http://giphy.com/gifs/nichijou-kbx1xOkv0xbnG) in [Nichijou](http://myanimelist.net/anime/10165/Nichijou) to shame. 

I was a little tempted to try, but I’m surprisingly not as reckless as your typical male protagonist in an anime.

“I don’t know why she would use a fucking loser like you for anything.”

Nope, I’m pretty reckless.

“And how the hell am I a loser, douche bag?”

His eyes narrowed 

“Now guys!” Isabel yelled coming in between us. “Obviously there are a lot of umm _differences_ between you two, but this shouldn’t be settled in the kitchen. Wouldn’t want any blood on the white floors now would we.” She let out a nervous chuckle.

Levi muttered something about having to wash the floor anyway now.

He looked a little conflicted. He really wanted to punch me in the face, but he didn’t want to upset Isabel either.  Well, that was good. That meant that as long as I was with Isabel, I should be relatively safe. 

He decided to solve this problem by removing Isabel from the room. 

“Isabel, would you mind bringing this to the table?” He said as he opened the microwave and took out the large bowl of popcorn that none of us noticed had finished. "Farlan’s going to start complaining pretty soon and I don’t exactly trust _Eren_ with _carrying food.”_ The last part was accompanied by a saccharine smile thrown my way. It sent shivers down my spine.

Oh no you don’t! I need her in order to stay alive!

“Hey Isabel, Mikasa always drinks water with her popcorn! If you could grab her a glass, because I don’t know where you keep them, I’ll bring the popcorn into the family room.”

“Oh yeah sure, no problem!” Isabel moved to hand the bowl of popcorn over to me. It was suddenly snatched away by someone with superhuman speed. 

“I’ll take the bowl in.” Levi snapped. 

That man moved like [Yoruichi Shihouin](http://files.bleachconnection.webnode.com.br/200000045-0803e08fb6/yoruichi-shihouin-do-bleach-1.jpg) with her [flash steps](https://media4.giphy.com/media/er19IJVpV3Qxq/200.gif). He marched out of the room without another word.

Isabel looked at me. “Umm, I’m gonna take a wild guess and say that you two don’t like each other very much.”

“Haha yeah something like that. Though he doesn’t really seem like the type to like people anyway.”

“But this seems kinda different. Eren, he _hates you!”_

“Gee thanks Isabel. I’m so glad we established that. I’d say the hate levels in our relationship increase exponentially every time we have the misfortune of bumping into each other. I’d almost say we’re getting close to '[Izaya and Shizuo](http://cdn3.cdnme.se/cdn/7-2/2398867/images/2011/30178-3boys-durarara-fighting-gif-heiwajima_shizuo-orihara_izaya-shinra_136936531.gif)'. Although I’m the one who technically started all of this so I guess I’m Izaya. Damn it. I’m the asshole. Though, can I just say that Izaya is voiced by one of my favorite voice actors? His voice is hot! That whole [Mephisto](http://tinypic.com/view.php?pic=10hlf8h&s=5#.VbfG9Lrfjdk) thing is a little weird, but that just makes him cooler because he can do different-"

“EREN!”

“Sorry.”

“It’s fine I was just gonna say- wait Izaya and Mephisto are the same dude?”

“Yeah isn’t that crazy? [Hiroshi Kamiya](http://www.behindthevoiceactors.com/Hiroshi-Kamiya/) voices both of them.”

“So you watch subs?”

“Oh yeah totally. I usually hate dubbed versions. Except for [Vic Mignogna](http://www.behindthevoiceactors.com/Vic-Mignogna/). He’s fucking hilarious. I watched FMAB and OHHC in English for him.”

“Oh wait he plays Edward Elric right?”

“Tamaki too.”

“Oh wow, that’s really funn- Eren! Focus! Stop getting off topic!”

“Hey, you went along with it!”

“That’s completely irrelevant. We’re talking about how much Levi hates you right now.”

“Oh yes, I remember now, how could I ever forget?” I couldn’t help rolling my eyes.

Isabel’s expression returned to serious. It would be futile to attempt to distract her again. Right now we were going to talk about Levi whether I wanted to or not. Which if you asked me, I didn’t.  I really didn’t like him and I didn’t give a shit how he felt about me. Some nice mutual hatred can be great for the soul. The first few times the guy terrified me, but soon that fear just turned into anger. Who the fuck is so rude after someone has an accident? They’re called accidents for a reason, it’s not like I randomly saw him in the park and decide to target him for my own sadistic pleasure.

“I’m saying he hates people in general, but he _really_ hatesyou. I don’t know what you did Eren, but whatever it is, allow me to say, you fucked up real bad.”

I sighed. “I’ve been having a rough summer. Or well…end of summer. And I feel like I just sold my soul to [Kyubey](https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQECVPgip78Q_sXM1WyUPBK7kXMsuC7BCc5cFYLXqe0roSufV_hDw) ([x](http://myanimelist.net/anime/9756/Mahou_Shoujo_Madoka%E2%98%85Magica)). Which is what you get when you don’t pay attention."

Isabel eyed me and gestured for me to continue.

I quickly summarized the events that had led to Levi’s hatred of my face. Or you know, existence.

“Yep, you’re fucked.”

I had nothing to say to that. Honestly, I knew I was fucked from the second I saw his eyes. Back in August when I was knocked flat on my ass.

“So should I be expecting Levi to jump me at some point tonight? At least I could have some kind of a warning.”

At this she scoffed.

“Listen Eren, I like ya, so I’m gonna tell you straight. One: Levi isn’t the type to jump someone. If you piss him off he’ll deck you in the face, yeah, but that’s not gonna count towards revenge. He’s the type of guy who holds grudges. Two: Even if he wanted to jump you, it wouldn’t matter how many warnings you got. He’d kick your ass.”

“…..but he seems so….I mean I can tell he works out, but he’s kinda short.”

“[Edward Elric](http://orig06.deviantart.net/95a1/f/2011/269/0/1/ed_elric_is_not_short_by_loveedelric-d4aztcc.jpg) is short. Would you ever mess with him?”

“There’s no alchemy in this world.”

“Ed can fight without it too, dumbass.”

“Point taken. You’re right Ed could probably destroy me. But he trains every day! He has an unfair advantage against me.”

She gave me a pointed look. “Exactly Eren, _you don’t train every day and you’d be crushed.”_

“Hey just because I’m not training to kill homunculi doesn’t mean I don't work out! I’ve got abs!”

Isabel held up her arms in surrender. “No need to get so defensive. Jeez. I’m sure you’ve got abs, but trust me Eren, if you think you can take Levi just because he’s short you’ve got another thing coming. I don’t care how much you work out.”

With that, she walked out of the kitchen. I followed her because they were probably starting the movie by now anyway. Isabel plopped down next to Mikasa. Farlan had apparently decided to sit like a normal person and was taking considerably less room than when Mikasa and I first walked in. The four of us stayed on the couch while Levi sat in a recliner. 

It turns out that Isabel is a fan of horror movies.

A rather big fan. She had a whole bunch of them pulled up on Netflix and even more piled next to the TV. She had already decided on the ones she wanted to watch tonight. Horror wasn’t my favorite genre of film, but a good scare every now and then was fine. It’s just I feel like I’ve been having a little too many scares recently in my life.

I contemplated just sleeping through the films, but I was snuggled up next to Isabel on the couch and I’m pretty sure she’d notice I was asleep if I wasn’t careful. I’d have to wait and see how into the movies she got.

Life was still kicking me in the ass because it turned out that Isabel hadn’t been too impressed with any of the films we had watched so far. Isabel soon gave up watching new movies and settled for 'most highly recommended’. 

She let out a blood-curdling scream at one point that shook up all of us, but the fit of laughter that shortly followed from seeing our reactions ruined the mood. It wouldn’t surprise me if living with Levi had made her immune. Not only was Levi more terrifying than any clown I had ever laid eyes on, he was also apparently able to kick someone’s ass no problem. Paired together, these two facts meant that Isabel was unable to fear anyone who the average person considered scary and, even if she ever did come across someone she found to be frightening, she had full faith that her older brother could take him. Yep definitely immune.

I allowed myself to be lost in thought. This movie was only halfway through, but it felt slow. I was hoping it would pick up soon. I was brought back to reality by a sudden chill that ran down my spine. I glanced at the screen expecting some horrifying scene only to be met with an inconsequential dialogue scene. Was it the music? They were talking about different ways that people could die and I guess that could be unsettling or gross, but not bone chilling. Man, I hadn’t even been listening so why the fuck do I feel so freaked out right now? I found my answer when I peered around Isabel. I was being stared at. By something much scarier than the weird psychotic murderer in the movie. Dear Isabel, if you really want to see a good horror movie, feel free to just watch my life story. 

I found myself locking eyes with him and I couldn’t bring myself to look away. I don’t know what movie it was that we were watching, but as the characters reflected on the deaths of others I couldn’t help but feel a sudden urge to turn the movie off. _Stop giving him ideas!_

I didn’t dare touch anything either. All night I hadn’t touched the popcorn or water. The jab about not trusting me with food had definitely been effective. I knew that if I spilled anything tonight, I wouldn’t be leaving the house alive. Maybe I was feeling all dramatic from watching _four_ horror films in one sitting, but I felt like this was life and death. Something in those steel eyes was telling me, “If even one kernel hits the carpeted floor, you will never again see the light of the sun.”

It was pissing me off.

Honestly, I was so done with being scared. So done.

Between the fucking screams and the gore happening on screen and the way I had been all tense since fucking August, I was done with this shit.

Fuck you.

You weird fucking weirdo. You’re always in the wrong fucking place at the wrong fucking time. Fuck your silver eyes and your fucking voice that isn’t bad to listen to and fuck the way you look hot from behin- Just Fuck you.

I met his eyes with new determination.

He noticed. His eyes narrowed like he was expecting me to do something. And he was damn right. I reached over Isabel and grabbed the popcorn bowl off Mikasa’s lap. I took the biggest handful I could manage and shoved it in my mouth. I finished it off by grabbing my untouched glass of water on the table in front of me. I chugged the entire thing before placing the glass back on the table. I felt Isabel shift as she turned to raise her eyebrows at me. I shrugged and she simply shook her head taking the popcorn bowl from me to grab a handful of her own.

“I’m going to go refill my water,” I whispered to Isabel. Out of habit, I checked Mikasa’s glass as well. Empty. I grabbed hers along with mine and headed for the kitchen. Hah! Now you can watch me carry in two cups of water filled to the brim. The way his eyes followed me as I maneuvered back into the family room was precious. I could tell he was restraining himself from jumping up and taking them out of my hands. Just to drive him a little closer to the edge I faked tripping. I allowed myself to stumble a little on my feet and give out a small startled noise. Isabel and Mikasa didn’t even notice, Levi, on the other hand, flinched so hard the recliner rocked backward. It was beautiful. He saw me smirking and fixed me with his worst glare yet. I shrugged at him nonchalantly and took my seat.

After drinking and refilling the plastic cup Isabel had given me, it was no surprise that I had to pee super bad by the time the credits rolled on-screen. I hadn't spilled anything either. As everyone got up to stretch, I darted off to the bathroom as fast as I could.

Upon exiting the bathroom, I noticed a dark shadow slumped against the wall in front of me.

“I really hope you’re standing there because you’ve got to piss and not because you’re a creep that follows people to the bathroom.”

“You don’t qualify as a person, you piece of shit.”

“So you neither confirm nor deny that you follow people to the bathroom?” I raised an eyebrow and crossed my arms.

He paused and gave me his _You really do piss me off_ face…It’s actually quite close to his normal face…

“I have to applaud your courtesy, most zombies don’t bother waiting for people to leave the bathroom, they just charge right in.”

He scoffed, “Fuck courtesy, I owe you a black eye for what you did to my pants. Not like you would understand the fucking worth of my clothing with the ugly ass T-shirts you wear all the time.”

“Hey! That was only twice! And just because I have lame T-shirts doesn’t give you the right to criticize what I wear on my days off.” 

“So you confirm that you wear lame shirts?” He said mockingly imitating my earlier pose.

Curse my mouth.

“Screw you. The ones that you’ve seen are all perfectly socially acceptable, you can’t even tell that they’re anime related.” Have I ever mentioned that my filter is shit?

He raised his eyebrows. “Wow. So you are a loser. I should have known.”

“That’s awfully judgmental. Doesn’t Isabel watch anime too?” 

“That’s different. I like her much better than you and she’s prettier too.”

“I am sensing a very strong amount of bias going on here.”

“I’m surprised that you’re able to sense anything at all, given your lack of a brain. Can you sense the punch in the face I'm dying to give you?”

Despite the situation, I couldn’t help but start laughing. 

“Anything to share brat?”

“No, it’s just I somehow expected some cheesy-ass line the super evil villain would say like ‘you should be sensing your eminent death’ and then the main character kicks the evil guy’s butt in an epic battle.”

He stared at me blankly. “You’re definitely much _much_ worse than Isabel. Even pretty faces aside."

“Ouch. You cut me deep.” I mocked, rolling my eyes and clutching my heart. I was getting pretty good at irking him without completely setting off his fuse. 

“Hey, guys I’m putting in the next one!” Isabel yelled from the living room.

I let out a sigh but stopped short when I realized that Levi was still watching my face. He scoffed. “Not a huge fan of horror movies?”

“Not like you would understand. I’m sure you love them.”

He raised his eyebrows at me, “Actually, I rather hate unnecessary deaths. It’s discomforting to watch, but most horror movies are so blatantly unreal that they bore me.”

I blinked at him a few times. I think I might have muttered an “Umm okay.” 

I stared at him for another few seconds before he fixed me with a glare.

“What’s with that face? What the hell did I do now?!” I couldn’t help, but be exasperated.

“You’re still standing there like a gaping fish and you’re blocking the fucking bathroom, brat. If you’re constipated do it on the toilet, not in the doorway, shithead.”

“….but I’m not constipated….Wait you were out here because you were actually waiting for the bathroom?”

“You have turd for brains.”  That was the last thing he said before he shoved me out of the way and went into the bathroom. The entire exchange had left me baffled.

With nothing else to do, I walked back to the family room and plopped back down on the couch. I caught Mikasa’s eye and mouthed _Last One_ before making myself comfortable. It was getting late and I wanted to go home. 

Levi didn’t come out of the bathroom until halfway through the movie. I really wanted to ask him if he had fallen into the toilet or something, but I didn’t get the chance.

And as to why he smelled like Lysol, that was beyond me.

We left as soon as the movie finished. It was super late and we were all falling asleep anyway. Any longer, and Mikasa would’ve had to carry me…which is sad….because she can… Anyway! Nothing much really happened after Levi used the bathroom. He didn’t even spare me a glance during the remainder of the movie, which was fine with me. It wasn’t until I was making my way out the door that he made his move, pressing up close to the back of my ear. “You and I aren’t done brat, I still want to know what the fuck you’re doing with Isabel. Expect to see more of me.”

“Bring it Satan.” was all I said before walking out the door. I do stupid things when I’m tired. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My Neighbor Totoro  
> D gray man  
> Death note  
> Nichijou  
> Bleach  
> Durarara!  
> Blue exorcist  
> Mahou Shoujo Madoka Magica  
> FullMetal Alchemist Brotherhood  
> Ouran High School Host Club
> 
> (any anime that has been mentioned in previous chapters won't have the myanimelist link, cuz I'm assuming people already saw it. ヾ(＠⌒ー⌒＠)ノ )
> 
>  
> 
> This chapter is actually the thing that started this entire fanfic. The scene with Eren immediately responding "NO! So I can write it in my Death Note!" was our very first joke. From there it was like 'Dude what would happen if we made Eren a total Weaboo?!" We actually aborted the idea of weaboo or Otaku and settled for Anime Nerd. This is because both Weaboo and Otaku have pretty negative connotations, plus I wanted Eren to actually have a life. So this means he would just be slightly more obsessed than your average Anime Fan, but not to the point of being like Wapanese. 
> 
> A lot of things didn't go the way it was originally planned, but thats what I expected from day one so I'm pretty content with the way things are goin.


	6. I Don't Know How to Deal With This

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I don't know how to deal with this." -Soul Eater (Crona)
> 
> Isabel and Eren get the dress, do some shopping and get to work. And talk about anime of course.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter summary- short, sweet, and to the point.
> 
> So I started watching some horror anime after writing this. I thought Mononoke was pretty good. The art was weird, but I liked it. It really grew on me and I enjoyed the style maybe just because it was different. It was actually pretty hard to find a site to watch the show on though cuz everything kept transferring me to Princess Mononoke. Which...yeah isn't the same thing. I also watched Ghost Hunt. Just in one of those moods. Last time this happened I had just finished Blue exorcist and I was bored, but in the mood for something a little creepier, maybe physiological so what did I do? I watched Tokyo Ghoul. I actually stayed up all night and watched Tokyo Ghoul. No regrets.

“You’re seriously reading one of those?”

My sister looked up from her magazine.

“Why not?” Some of the dresses aren’t half bad. With some slight alterations, they could look really good. It’s interesting to look at the different venue options too. I could see myself in some of these, not too fancy, but still really nice.

“Mikasa, you’re not even engaged! And we don’t live in Las Vegas!!!”

She huffed and then proceeded to ignore me by way of returning to her ‘Las Vegas Bride’ magazine.

For the past week, we had been getting tons of magazines. All different kinds. And the kicker is we didn’t order any of them. Not a single one! It had started off with just one or two random magazines about housekeeping and we figured it was just some weird fluke of the universe. But then more magazines kept coming. A lot more. And they all had a nice little sticker with my name and address on them. It wasn’t even like I was getting some sports magazine that was really cool; it was ridiculous stuff! Lucky me. Our kitchen counter was littered with shit like: American Baby, Bridal Guide, Ladies’ home Journal, PRO: Portable Restroom Operator, Teddy Bear Times, Working Mother, Boating Life, I Love Cats, How to Prepare for Labor, AND SO MANY MORE!

There were literally magazines about GIVING BIRTH! News Flash, I don’t have a _vagina_! I’m a guy! And I’m gay! I’m not a ‘working mother’ and I don’t even own a freaking boat!

Mikasa didn’t seem to mind and I think she secretly enjoyed reading Ladies Home Journal, but we were going to get buried if this kept up. More kept coming every day and they were always something different.

 Neither of us had any fucking clue what was going on, but I needed to find a way to cancel these subscriptions. I had nothing in any of my email inboxes regarding magazine subscriptions so I would have to sit down and unsubscribe each magazine one by one, either by phone or by finding a way on their website. Either way, this was going to take fucking forever and I really didn’t want to have to deal with this. School was bad enough.

I sighed. “Mika, I’m heading out. I’ll probably be out for a while, but I have my phone and—dear Lord what is this?” I asked picking up a magazine titled “Funeral Service Times” and turning it towards her. She shrugged her shoulders and reached out to take it from me.

“Wow. I didn’t see this one. I wonder if they have coupons for this kind of thing…?” My face must have been absolutely stupefied because she quickly dismissed her own question.

“And who exactly are you planning on burying?”

“You never know.” She murmured distractedly.

I was out the door with one last wave of my hand.

Annie would be working the morning shift at the shop, which meant I was stuck driving to Isabel’s house to pick her up so we could grab the wedding dress and go shopping at 8 o’clock on a Sunday morning.

Isabel had been waiting for me to arrive and promptly ran out the door as soon as I pulled into her driveway.

“Alright, lead the way,” I said as she climbed into shotgun.

“Hai, Taichou!” she saluted.

She immediately reached for her audio jack and plugged in her iPod to the stereo system.

I was about to ask her what she was going to play when I heard a very familiar opening.

"Oh my God, you're amazing!"

She flashed me a huge grin and I turned up the volume. It was Again by Yui. This was my kinda shit.

When the song ended I peered over at her and asked, "what else you got on there?"

"You'll see,” she said in a singsong voice.

By the time we got to our destination, we had listened to Resonance, Pray, Go!!!, Ignite, Goya no Machiawase, Uragiri No Yuuyake, USO, Core Pride, and one I can never remember the name of, but it was the opening from Psycho Pass (it has some 'k's and 'n's) ....and Sakura Kiss...in English and Japanese… 

([x](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=upeC0p5Te4w&list=PLCyUbTo4zZ9oLG1LWbhYYhYnUnsxuJuJz)) 

We were actually a little late. The reason was _not_ because I was distracted and missed a few turns. Please. I don’t even know the words to the songs Isabel was playing. And I most definitely was not singing at the top of my lungs with all the windows down. Nope nope nope.

Isabel and I got out of the car and went to the front door.

I was met with a pleasant surprise when the door flew open.

“Oh, hi Eren, what are you doing here?”

“I’m actually here with Isabel," I gestured over my shoulder with my thumb towards Isabel, who was standing behind me. "It’s nice to see you, Christa. I didn’t know you and Isabel were friends, small world.”

A tall girl with dark hair and freckles appeared in the doorway next to Christa, “Actually Isabel is here for me.”

“Ymir, right?” If Christa was here and this wasn't her house, then this was probably the Ymir I'd heard about.

“Yep. You guys can come on in."

I knew Christa as a friend of a friend. She was often at Jean’s parties or Sasha’s potlucks. I heard that she had recently gotten a girlfriend and the name Ymir was thrown around a few times, but I had never actually met the girl. But apparently, Ymir was friends with Isabel. It really was a small world.

Ymir already had the dress pulled out. She hadn’t packed it up because she knew that Isabel and I wanted to see it.

Ymir was tall. And so was the dress. As far as height went, we wouldn’t have any problems making Isabel look headless. Just watching Isabel and Ymir stand side by side was amusing. Considering that Isabel was shorter than I was and Ymir was taller, it looked pretty awkward. Isabel’s loud personality more than made up for it, though.

The dress was already a little torn up, but that was just the way we wanted it. No headless bride would be prancing around in a flawless pearly white gown.

"You don't care if it's torn a little more, right Isabel?"

She shook her head.

I knelt down and tore off a piece that was hanging off the train and tucked it into my pocket.

"Time for shopping!" Isabel made a few whooping noises and jumped back into shotgun.

And our karaoke session recommenced.

When we got to the store that Annie worked at, Isabel took her time looking around.

"Hey Eren, I got your text." Annie greeted as she walked up to us.

"Great, this is the dress we're working with." I gave her my phone to view pictures of the full gown and then showed her the piece I cut off so that she could get a feel for the dress.

We discussed some of the ideas we had and I showed her my sketchbook where I had jotted down all of my thoughts and made some sketches. She listened to everything I said and added some advice of her own. As someone who was not only in the same profession as Mikasa, but was also dating (I don’t care what Mika said, they were definitely dating) her, I definitely trusted Annie's opinions.

We spent the longest time looking at different veils. I was actually a little surprised that they even carried them, but this was a second-hand store that specialized in accessories, so why the hell not?

We didn't head to Isabel's house until noon.

Isabel grabbed all the bags and I carried in the dress draped over my arms. It was definitely a beautiful dress even though it was already a little ruined. It was styled in an old fashioned way but still had a rather long train. The sleeves were pretty long too, which was great. It would be a lot easier to fake the arms when there were sleeves to cover them up. I was also super proud of the short boss-ass hand gloves that we bought, which would enhance the elegance of the dress.

Busy admiring the gown as I walked through the house, I let myself go on autopilot since I was already pretty familiar getting to the back room where Isabel and I would be working.

I didn't look up until I passed the doorway leading to the kitchen. And who should be sitting there, sipping coffee and reading, but my favorite person in the whole wide world.

He looked at me and nearly dropped his coffee mug.

We held each other’s gaze, but he was the first to break it, choosing to look at what it was I was holding instead of my face.

"Isabel dear," he called out in a sickly sweet voice.

"Yep?" She asked appearing in front of me and popping her head into the kitchen doorway.

"Any special reason why _Eren_ is _carrying a wedding dress_?"

"Nope," she grabbed me and pulled me past the doorway. I had just enough time to see his reaction as Isabel pulled me away. It was fucking priceless.

 As soon as we got into the back room, I had to shut the door before I collapsed on the floor laughing.

"Oh my God, that was perfect! Did you see the look on his face? Especially after you said ‘no’. That was fucking fantastic!"

When I regained my composure, we got to work. We decided to leave the door shut and locked so that Levi couldn't pay us a surprise visit. Isabel doubted that he would anyway, but just to be safe.

This week would be all about making the fake top and arms of the dress and making adjustments so that the dress fit Isabel the way it should.

It was a lot to handle, but working with Isabel was pretty fun. Not to mention if I could get more of those faces out of Levi, I would consider all my hard work paid back in full.

I was actually looking forward to coming back tomorrow evening.

Even though Levi would be there.

 On my way out of the house, I carefully peered around the corners and made my footsteps as soft and swift as possible. Pfft, I could totally be a badass ninja from the leaf village.

~

"I'm not kidding. To be honest I don't even like cats.  Why the hell would I want a magazine all about _loving_  them?"

Isabel shrugged her shoulders in response and let out a laugh with a shake of her head. Today's [shirt](http://ih1.redbubble.net/image.55163196.4494/ra,fitted_scoop,x3104,navy,front-c,600,650,900,850-bg,f8f8f8.4u9.jpg) of choice was [Spirited Away](http://myanimelist.net/anime/199/Sen_to_Chihiro_no_Kamikakushi).

"You know, the only cat I've ever remotely liked is Blue exorcist's [Kuro](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/b1/0c/24/b10c24420b04c82e8ffcce11cea202c1.jpg). And he's not even a cat, he just looks like one."

  

"Okay, so anime cats okay?"

"Yeah, I guess. They're usually pretty cute. Like I think [Chi](https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS3-fxx07rFeLvnZja2-1NcOmV-cWVE9bC2iThBciLMiodzqq00) is adorable, but real cats don't exactly look like that." ([x](http://myanimelist.net/anime/3841/Chis_Sweet_Home))

"What about [Happy](http://vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/fairytail/images/7/76/Happy_Anime_S2.png/revision/latest?cb=20101012010956)? He's animated and cat-like too. I think he's pretty cute."

"Okay for the record that's a stupid ass name. He's funny, I'll give him that, but seriously, his name." I shook my head sadly.

"You know it's not as bad as [Hummy](https://www.google.com/search?q=hummy&biw=1280&bih=738&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0CAYQ_AUoAWoVChMIhPmp0t-9yAIVSe9jCh3uhQnn#imgrc=TZo6e90BzB5n_M%3A). That's the name of the cat thing in [Suite Pretty Cure](http://myanimelist.net/anime/9893/Suite_Precure%E2%99%AA)."

I gave her a blank look.

She groaned and pulled out her phone to show me a picture. "See. Hummy."

"God! That's terrifying! It's like they took Kyuubey's face and tried to make it look cutsey. That's one of the creepiest cats I've ever seen! Like creepier than a real-life cat."

“You get creeped out by cats?”

“On occasion yes. Real cats are more terrifying than anime ones, but I make an exception for weird demon cat-things that want me to make contracts with them.” I finished the statement with a shiver. “Though speaking of creepy,” I gave her a pointed look, “ever heard of Fashion Doll magazine?”

She shook her head.

“That shit is creepy as fuck.”

She turned from what she was working on to raise her eyebrows at me.

“I want you to picture the level of creepy you felt watching [Hell Girl](http://myanimelist.net/anime/228/Jigoku_Shoujo). They’re literally dolls but the way they pose… and their eyes! The eyes! Plus it’s October so they sent out their Halloween edition.”  I shook my head.

“Damn. That shit’s creepy. Ever since I watched the doll part of [Ghost Hunt](http://myanimelist.net/anime/1571/Ghost_Hunt), they’ve totally freaked me out.”

“Wait, you actually do feel fear?”

“What?! Yes I feel fear, you dumbass!”

“But when we were watching those horror movies on Friday, you didn’t even bat an eye!”

“Cuz those weren’t scary!”

“But Ghost Hunt is?”

“Yeah! When I watched it, I nearly shat myself. There are tons of other freaky anime too! Like [Another](http://myanimelist.net/anime/11111/Another) had those creepy ass dolls too! Ehhhhh.”She shivered. 

“Shat?”

“Nevermind! It doesn’t matter! The point is, I agree that dolls are creepy as fuck and if you ever bring one or that magazine into my house, I’ll kill you.”

I blinked at her. The fearless Isabel was terrified of dolls. It was…wow.

She glanced over at me and scowled

“You thought they were scary too.”

“No, I totally agree with you. I think they’re terrifying, that’s why that magazine freaked me the fuck out. I just didn’t expect you to agree.”

She sighed, “Just keep worki-"

She was interrupted by the sound of her cellphone going off next to her.  The phone call was quick and she hung up after a few short replies.

“Eren, Farlan’s stranded; I have to go pick him up. I know you only got here like fifteen minutes ago, I mean you can keep working I’ll be back in no more than 20 minutes, but if you don’t feel comfortable by yourself I understand.”

“Actually it’s fine. If you’re back in 20 minutes I can just keep at it, I was going to stay for at least another hour anyway. But, I mean, are you really ok with me being alone in your house?”

“It’s fine, I trust you.”

“…Weren’t we just talking about creepy anime?”

“Yep, but you’re not a doll!” She said with a bright smile and turned on her heel to rush out of the room.

I noticed it 15 or so minutes after Isabel left.

Something smelled…off.

As I left the back room, the scent got worse. Something somewhere was definitely burning and dear God I did not want to be responsible for a fire. I headed for the kitchen and found dinner. If one could really call that charred mess dinner.

I whipped out my phone and called Isabel. Farlan picked up.

“Hello?”

“Yeah, hi Farlan."

“Gimme a sec, I’ll put you on speaker for Isabel. Alright, you’re on.”

“Hey Izzy, so ummm about dinner…."

“FUCK!”

There was a long string of curse words on the other end of the line and I sincerely hoped that Isabel hadn’t crashed the car.

“How bad?”

“Uhhh pretty bad…”

“Fuck! This fucking sucks. We’re stuck in traffic too. There was an accident and we have no idea when we’re going to get moving. There are fucking cops everywhere, but it doesn’t look like anyone is doing shit.”

“How far out are you guys?”

“Theoretically 10 minutes, but with this traffic it’s gonna take us an hour.” She moaned and I felt pretty horrible. “Plus now there’s no dinner.” She paused for a few seconds before the swearing started up anew.

“Levi’s got the fucking convention tonight with Erwin and I was going to have dinner ready for him because otherwise he won’t eat anything! Those fuckturds don’t have anything at the meeting and it’s going to take hours and I know he hasn’t fucking eaten all day because Hanji took today off and that dumb fucking asshat never leaves his work for food unless Hanji drags him by his fucking balls!”

I was a little too stunned to say anything. I could hear Farlan laughing, though. “Sorry bout that Eren, Levi eating is a touchy subject for Isabel.”

With a low whistle I replied, “I can tell.”

“Stop fucking laughing Farlan; it’s pissing me off more. Ugh sorry. I’m just really high-strung right now, and the deadline is coming up, Eren, and now Levi’s going to be home in like 20 minutes and the only thing waiting for him is a disaster to clean up. I was really planning on getting home before him and if we weren’t stuck in fucking traffic then I would have been home in time and the food wouldn't have burned. I can't believe I fucking forgot to turn the damn stove down so it would cook slower. Fuck…Listen Eren, this is going to take forever. Mikasa’s probably waiting for you at home right? You can head out since I obviously won’t be back anytime soon.”

I honestly felt too horrible to just leave things as they were without doing anything. I wasn’t the type of person who could just walk out of the house knowing how stressed out Isabel was right now.

“Hey Isabel, do you mind if I use your kitchen?”

“Of course not," she responded without thinking. “Wait what? What are you going to do with the kitchen?”

“Dinner’s on me.”

“Eren, can you even cook? Never mind, it doesn’t matter; I couldn’t ask you to do that. We'll just order pizza.”

I heard a loud groan from Farlan at the mention of pizza, coupled with something like, "Again? Levi's not gonna like that."

“You’re not asking me, I’m offering. Completely different. And as for your earlier comment: One, rude! And two, yes, yes I can cook. Who the hell do you think packs Mikasa’s lunch and makes her dinner? If it were up to her all she would drink is protein shakes and coffee. Sometimes she spends too much time worrying about me and doesn’t even eat herself, it’s ridiculous!”

I didn’t realize I had been rambling until after I stopped. And now I just felt kind of awkward.

“Umm wow. If you’re the one who makes those lunches Mikasa always brings, I would be honored to have you use our kitchen, but are you sure it’s okay? It feels like I’m using you.”

“Well, I’m using your ingredients and I’ll make enough to take some home for dinner and we’ll call it even. Fair?”

“Fair!” Farlan yelled before Isabel had a chance to respond.

“Farlan!”

“What? That’s fair! And if you ruin my chance to get good food like this, my stomach will rebel against me and I shall perish. I'm so not in the mood for pizza tonight. And you know how much Levi hates pizza. He won't eat if we get pizza.”

This guy really was a demon. Who didn’t like pizza?

Isabel huffed but finally agreed.

“This is a pretty stupid question, but you guys don’t have any food in your fridge that you don’t like, right?”

“That is correct sir, anything you find is fair game. And I went grocery shopping yesterday so there should be a lot to choose from,” Farlan had taken the phone off speaker and was now eagerly talking to me directly. “Good luck and thank you.”

Uss! Let’s do this!

I started by throwing out the ruined food and cleaning everything up. With a fresh pallet, I made my way over to the fridge. And that thing was stocked. Damn.

I was actually starting to get a bit excited; this would be fun.

My brain decided that something faster would probably be ideal since dinner was already supposed to be good to go. And that thing about Levi coming home soon…what a buzz kill.

…But what a great opportunity.

At that moment, I swore something to myself; I was going to make something so delicious, tomorrow Satan would get withdrawal symptoms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I didn't want to connect each individual song to a link because....why would I do that? There's a lot of them. I decided to instead insert a link to a playlist. So one link, all the songs. Good stuff. Theres also a lot of other songs there too, I'll probably reference those later and insert the link again. (I'll list the anime that the openings are from anyway cuz it'll only take like two seconds and I like to keep track of them.)
> 
> FMA  
> Soul Eater  
> Gintama  
> Naruto  
> Ignite  
> Noragami  
> Durarara!!  
> Blue Exorcist  
> Psycho Pass  
> OHSHC (I always write OHHC but High School is two different words....)  
> Spirited Away  
> Chi's Sweet Home  
> Suite Pretty Cure  
> Hell Girl  
> Ghost Hunt  
> Another


	7. That Man Never Smiles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "That Chef Never Smiles"- Food Wars (episode 3 title)
> 
> Eren works his butt off and tries his best to make a killer dish. Cooking for Levi (and Family) turns out to be an interesting experience and it's quite possible that Levi and Eren are getting along better [(❛ัॢᵕ❛ั ॢ)✩*ೃ]. Recent events will also have some light shed on them. (･･*)｡｡oＯ( Aren't I vague?)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello once again. So this is actually going to start out Levi POV, if that makes some of you annoyed.....Sorry man, but I did it for your sake. I mean I already know what's going on. Editor and Creative Director are the ones who actually pushed me to switch POV because originally I was just going to stick with Eren through to the end, but if I did that....we wouldn't get nearly enough Hanji going. And that would be a tragedy. A crime against the very gods of humor. (Can you tell it's late and I don't exactly know what I'm saying anymore?)  
> Plus you know why would I write about Eren cooking when I could write about Levi experiencing a Foodgasm? Just kidding. No foodgasms. Although speaking of those, Food Wars. This chapter has a lot of that. It's a newer anime, but surprisingly popular so I threw it in here (there?...IT). If you've never heard of it, Hey Whatever! Now you have! 
> 
> Because this is all anime related so as some of you may have suspected Eren pulls a dish from an anime. That anime being Food Wars. Lots of Food Wars. But only the beginning of the show. Yay!
> 
> As always please enjoy!

**Levi POV**

Late.

I fucking hated being late.

And because some dickheads didn’t know how to fucking drive, I had even less time to spend at home and dinner was probably cold. If there even was any dinner at all.

Knowing Isabel she may have very well forgotten both dinner and her threat… which on second thought wouldn't be too bad.

After finding out that Hanji wasn’t working today, Isabel had freaked out and threatened something along the lines of, “If you don’t eat dinner as soon as you get home, I’m going to fucking tie you to an electric chair and shock you until your mouth hangs limply open so I can pour dinner down your helpless fucking esophagus.”

Tch, what a violent kid. Wasn’t sure how electrocuting the shit out of me because I wasn’t eating was supposed to make things better, but I figured I should probably avoid that.

I had called Isabel earlier to tell her I wouldn't be home for another fucking half hour at least. It normally only took twenty minutes to get home. The twenty back to work that I would have to do later this evening was not something I was looking forward to. God, I was so fucking pissed. I almost felt pity for anyone dumb enough to try to talk to me tonight. If I was this pissed off now, I couldn’t even imagine the foul fucking mood I would be in after tonight’s meeting.

There was another car in the driveway, but somehow my brain automatically dismissed it, thinking simply that it was the car Isabel and Farlan shared. The model wasn't the same and the color was off, but my tired eyes didn't register it until long after I had pushed open the front door.

The smell of food overwhelmed me as I stepped through the threshold.

I could hear someone cooking in the kitchen.

"Isabel?" I called out as I reached the doorway.

The scene I found in the kitchen was definitely the last one I expected.

It wasn't Isabel cooking. And it certainly wasn't Farlan. But it was definitely a guy.

As he noticed my presence, all the pieces clicked into place.

That car. I had seen that car before. Several times actually. Speeding off down the street just as I pulled in, or pulling in just as I left. Always avoiding me.

The little fucker.

What the fuck was **_Eren_** doing **_Alone_** in **_my_** fucking house?

If the food didn't smell so good I would’ve dragged the bastard out of my house by his shithole and castrated him. (There would be absolutely no blood in my white kitchen.)

“Hey Levi. It’s almost ready. If you could uh set the table, that’d be great. Isabel and Farlan will be home soon too hopefully.”

Shocking. Absolutely shocking.

This Goddamn little brat. I was gonna ram my foot up his ass so hard, he’d never be able to shit again.

I held up my fingers as I spoke.

“One: Don’t you “ _Hey Levi”_ me, you little shit. Two: You’re lucky I haven’t shoved a frying pan up your ass yet and rearranged your innards with it. Thr- This isn’t cooking wine you dipshit!” I reached for the bottle of wine he had set on the counter and turned it around.

It was…Burgundy. I looked at him.

“Are you…Are you making Bœuf Bourguignon?”

He nodded.

I didn’t know how to react. It had been years since I had Bœuf Bourguignon… Not since the last time I was in France, in fact. No one around here could really make it. It always tasted like shit and then just made me wish I was there.

“Isabel said I had permission to use anything I could find. I do have to say, though, your wine fridge is loaded. It took me a while to find the Burgundy.”

“You could have used the Beaujolais or the Côte du Rhône too, you know.”

“Yeah I know, but I usually use Burgundy and I figured this wouldn’t be the ideal time to start experimenting with different wines to see which wine it is that I like best.”

I nodded absentmindedly, still trying to wrap my head around the fact that the piece of shit I definitely trusted _least_ with food was in my fucking house _cooking_. And he wasn’t cooking just anything. He was cooking a traditional French dish. One I hadn’t had in years.

And I wasn’t stopping him.

Because I didn’t want to.

And that was scary.

The brat turned to me and smiled.

“It’s almost done, it would be great if you could set the table.” He repeated.

“Tch you don’t have to fucking repeat yourself brat.”

“I’ll take the bowls up here on the counter so I can make the dishes.”

I actually set the table. What the fuck was I doing? If this dish didn’t turn out well, I might just lose it. He was getting my hopes up and I didn’t like it. I really shouldn’t be expecting anything.

“Why did you decide to make Bœuf Bourguignon anyway?”

“Well to be honest I made the pasta first. I thought I would just make something simple and fast because Isabel said you would be home in twenty minutes, but then she called again and said it would be at least an hour. If all of you guys were going to take an hour, I figured I might as well make something that would take longer and use the pasta as a side to go with it. Isabel was actually going to make stew tomorrow so the beef was already set to be cooked. Once I checked your wine fridge, it was all just a little too tempting.”

I nodded. It made sense. His back was turned to me, though, so he couldn’t exactly see my response.

He must be one of those people that don’t like awkward silences because the brat just kept going.

“I thought it was a good dish to make today, too, because you still have work tomorrow and shit. This way you can just take some leftovers with you. It’s one of those rare gems that only gains flavor when you reheat it, so it’s really good on the second day. I looked up the recipe online and some dude said it’s great with a bottle of Côte de Nuit Villages Pommard. I’ve never had it, but hey, who the fuck knows?”

“Côte de Nuit.”

“Sorry?”

“It’s pronounced Côte de Nuit.”

“Isn’t that what I said?”

I couldn’t help, but smirk. “No, you said ‘Coat Dee Nweet’”

“My bad. I’m German so excuse me if I don’t speak French,” he muttered in response.

His head whipped around to face me, “Wait? So you speak French?”

“I am French, dipshit. So are Isabel and Farlan actually. Even though none of us are directly related and we all come from different regions, we were all born in France. I’m surprised you never asked Isabel about her accent. It’s faded a lot over the years, but it’s definitely still there.”

I finished setting the table and sat down at the counter.

 “I never asked, but I did notice it. I just didn’t want to put her on the spot. Some people get embarrassed when you talk about their accent. I know when I was a kid, I used to get embarrassed all the time when people asked me about my German accent. It’s pretty subdued now. My parents were from Germany and even though they spoke fluent English, when we were at home they would only talk to me in German, so by the time I started middle school I was fluent in German and English…”

He glanced up at me, “Sorry I didn’t mean to ramble, it just kind of happens.”

I waved a hand, “It’s fine. Some conversation is nice once in a while; I don’t mind talking as long as the conversation isn’t boring as hell. And I am a little intrigued to find out where you learned to cook.”

He opened his mouth to respond, but the loud crash of the front door slamming interrupted him.

Isabel ran into the room.

“Oh thank goodness you’re still alive!”

Eren and I both kind of stared at her. I was a little unsure of what she was talking about.

“Thanks for the concern Isabel, but yeah I managed to stay alive. And you guys are back just in time,” Eren said with a shit-eating grin. He grabbed two dishes and set them on the table and then placed one in front of me with an eating utensil.

“Sir, would you do me the honor of being my taste tester?”

I huffed and grabbed the spoon.

“If you’re trying to poison me, your efforts are futile, brat. I’m immune to poison.”

He let out a laugh at that.

“Somehow, I’m not surprised.”

I would have added another snarky comment, but honestly, the food in front of me was just begging to be eaten. And for the first time in weeks, I found myself genuinely hungry. I skipped meals all the time, much to Isabel’s dismay, but mostly just because it felt like a waste of time. If I knew I could go without eating why bother when I could keep working?

I put the food in my mouth. And _fuck_.

It was absolutely delicious.

“Holy Shit!” Isabel scream whispered. Like she was afraid to startle a wild animal. “Eren, you did it!”

“Shhhhhhh!” Eren yelled at Isabel.

What the hell were they doing?

“Is it good?” They were all staring at me eagerly awaiting my answer.

I could tell them to fuck off and lie about how good the food was by saying it tasted fucking horrible, but as I contemplated my options, my mouth moved on its own.

“It’s not bad...”

Even Farlan gasped in surprise. “Damn,” he murmured.

And then it was excitement.

“Eren! Nice! You nailed it! Hell, gimme some!” Farlan ran to the table and took a mouth full of the dish. “This is fucking delicious! You are a God!”

“I wanna try too!” Isabel rushed to her seat, took a bite, and practically moaned. “Oh my god, it’s so good. And I can’t believe it really worked.”

Eren nodded in response.

“You must have done a lot of good in the city to get that miracle out of the grump.” ([x](http://myanimelist.net/anime/2167/Clannad))

I raised my eyebrows at them. “So Eren, where exactly did you learn to make Bœuf Bourguignon so well?”

He blushed, “Well umm I’ve been cooking for a while. It was just kind of necessary…umm… and as for the dish, I saw it on a um…TV show and it looked really good and I wanted to try to get more experience in French dishes.” ([x](http://myanimelist.net/anime/28171/Shokugeki_no_Souma))

“A TV show? Like Hell’s kitchen or something?”

“Yeah! Like Hell’s Kitchen!’ He responded quickly. I stared at him.

“It’s an anime isn’t it?” Eren immediately tried to cover it up and he might have succeeded, if not for Isabel. I know her much too well and her face told me everything. I scoffed and rolled my eyes.

“I regret nothing,” Eren stated, dramatically crossing his arms and turning his head away in a huff.

“Whatever brat,” I said picking up my plate and joined Farlan and Isabel at the table.

“You know, Eren, you really are very talented at cooking,” Farlan stated.

“Thanks. I’m actually working in a restaurant right now. I’m an art student and I know that it’s pretty difficult to make a living off of art alone, but I’ve always enjoyed the culinary arts too, so I have something to fall back on.”

Farlan was nodding along, “Makes sense.”

Eren still hadn’t grabbed his plate yet and I was starting to get a little impatient.

Farlan and Isabel would already be finished their first plateful if they weren’t still staring at Eren in awe.

“Well, are you going to hurry up and get your dish and sit down at the fucking table like a normal human being?”

I seemed to have startled him.

“Actually, I’m gonna take off right about now. I achieved what I set out for anyway.” The shit-eating grin was back.

“Making us all dinner?”

His grin grew even larger. What an annoying brat.

“Not quite. This dish was especially made for ‘[the _man_ who doesn’t smile.](http://ib3.huluim.com/video/60561030?size=220x124)’”

Isabel burst out laughing, “I knew it! I freaking knew it as soon as I walked in!”

Farlan seemed to understand what was going on too or sincerely didn’t care.

“So what exactly was your goal?” I crossed my arms at him.

“Levi,” Isabel sighed exasperated, “you _smiled!”_

I smiled? When the fuck did I smile? I never smile. _OOhhhhh_. Very funny, Jaeger, the dish was made for ‘the man who doesn’t smile’. What an asshat. Well, that doesn’t change the fact that I didn’t smile…

“When the hell did I smile?”

This time it was Farlan who answered. “As soon as you bit into the dish you smiled, Levi. We all saw it. You even admitted that it was good… You can’t deny this one, big guy.”

Goddamn it.

I sighed. “Well, do you guys remember the last time we had Bœuf Bourguignon?”

Isabel and Farlan both thought about it and suddenly the meal felt a lot more nostalgic.

“It really has been a while,” Farlan concluded.

Eren seemed to sense the change in the air too. He had already gotten a container and filled it with some food to take home.

“Hey guys, I’m going to head home now. See ya!”

Isabel chirped a “get home safely” as did Farlan.

~~~~~~~

It really was better the second day.

I was in the process of savoring the leftover Bœuf Bourguignon that I had brought with me to work and reheated when Hanji burst in.

“I must be dead!”

“Well praises be, there really is a God.”

“Okay, you appear to be Levi, but what are you doing?”

“Tch, I’m eating my lunch, you blind dumbass.”

“That’s what I can’t get over!!! You never eat lunch of your own free will! I always have to blackmail you and pry you away from your desk!”

“Well shitty foureyes, today is an exception.” A big exception, actually. I had been looking forward to lunch pretty much all day. And it hadn’t let me down. The dish tasted fucking delicious. It was almost a problem…

“Well, either way, I guess I won’t complain as long as you’re eating.” She took a seat at the table, but still watched me warily as she took out her own lunch.

“So, any new developments with Eren?”

I nearly choked on my food.

“No.” I needed something that would distract her and stop her from finding out about the food. “I heard him complaining to Isabel about some of the magazines, though. That was pretty amusing.”

“Oh, you have no idea!” Her eyes were gleaming. “I took some online surveys which gave me even more participation points and the stuff I got access to could give you a week’s worth of wet dreams! And if my calculations are accurate, he should be getting the really interesting magazines starting tomorrow.”

I rolled my eyes at her and didn’t bother responding.

This whole thing had pretty much been her idea anyway. Upon hearing what happened to my favorite pair of pants, Hanji had excitedly jumped up and yelled “I shall avenge your pants! The sword of retribution will soon slay the perpetrator, and by my very hands, I shall make him pay for what he has done!”

She truly was a terrifying woman.

But I had complied. Giving her Eren’s full name, she was quickly able to find other personal information on a certain Eren Jaeger. Including a home address. She had wanted to start off with some porny magazines right off the bat, but I encouraged her to ease into it. The Home Cleaning magazines had been on my recommendation too. The brat could probably use some advice for his living standards.

Most of the subscriptions we got were free. Others could be accessed for free just by taking some surveys and whatnot.

When the magazines asked for a valid email address, we ended up inserting Erwin’s. Two birds with one stone. Filling up Erwin’s personal email inbox with shit about magazine subscriptions could be counted towards revenge for all the shit he’s been putting us through lately. Especially all these fucking meetings.

Really it was the least we could do.

~~~~

**Eren POV**

I couldn’t help but scream.

“Mika, what the fuck is this?”

 _This_ was a Magazine called Girls and Corpses.

It was literally a magazine about sexy girls in raunchy positions posing with dead things. Like the most disgusting skeleton, you’ve ever seen in your life. The magazine was downright disturbing!

And it wasn’t the only one.

All the mags we had gotten today were incredibly distressing.

Each of them was kinky in a disgusting way or full of fat, naked old men.

“That’s what came in the mail today.”

Mikasa responded nonchalantly. As if she wasn’t surrounded by the most abominable creations of mankind.

“We are getting rid of these RIGHT NOW!” I grabbed as many as I could and grabbed my laptop. I went on each individual website and unsubscribed to every single fucking magazine we had gotten for the day. Sure I had to plug in my full name and address on every single damn website, but I would do anything to make sure that I never saw another copy of _Mr. Sexy_  in my life.

It took hours. Some sites didn’t even give an option to unsubscribe, so I ended up doing it the old fashion way and calling them on the phone. It was a free subscription anyway, so no one gave me too much trouble. But a lot of them were definitely confused as to why I would sign up for a magazine and then cancel the subscription after receiving the first issue.

I was about ready to fucking kill someone by the end of it.

Instead, I made my way over to Isabel’s house.

I had already begun painting the dress so that the top looked like it was all bloody and gory… And I had been looking up a lot more severed heads than I would like to admit.

The paint took a relatively long time to dry on the dress too, and I had to be careful that it didn’t drip in a way that I didn’t want it to and end up looking fucking stupid, so we were taking it nice and slow. There wasn’t much Isabel could do at this point to help me either, other than hold things for me and make sure that the dress stayed on its mannequin.

It was turning into one hell of a day.

The next day wasn’t really any better.

The magazines had gotten even worse. There weren’t as many Lesbian ones, but still an ungodly number.

And I think Mikasa had managed to dig them out before I woke up. They were in a neat stack next to her laptop. I sighed. Today was probably the best day of her life. Free Lesbian pornos.

As for me, the gay pornos should have probably made me happy too, but honestly, I was just so sick of these fucking magazines. And huge macho guys really weren’t my type.

Not to mention that most of the magazines were about Viagra and shit.

I picked up one:

“Tired of having a small dick? WE CAN HELP”

I was starting to feel sexually harassed.

Every single one of these damn things were telling me they could help fix my penis.

I will have you know that there is absolutely nothing wrong with my dick! It’s a perfectly nice dick, thank you very much! I don’t need sildenafil to get hard, but gee thanks for asking. And no, trust me, I don’t want your fucking Viagra or your fucking Revatio! I’M FINE!

I even had fucking classes today too.

Instead of working, I ended up just crashing on the couch chair in the back room when I reached Isabel’s place.

“My day has been a fucking nightmare, Izzy. What the hell did I do to deserve this?”

“Well, I guess you used up all your good juju when you made Levi smile. That was your one miracle.”

Well fuck. I wasted my miracle.

I thought back to that moment when Levi put the beef in his mouth and smiled. It hadn’t been a smile with teeth or anything, but it was a nice smile.

 _When_ I decided to make him smile, I’m not really sure. At first, it was just kind of a little challenge to impress him or some shit. But I wanted solid proof, and the first thing I thought of was to make the ‘chef who doesn’t smile’ smile.

And I did. I had actually surprised myself by how happy I was that I had gotten Levi to smile. My initial reaction had been, _God I wonder how many other faces I can pull out of him?_

It was as fucking disturbing as some of those magazines.

Okay not that bad, but still pretty bad.

I was pulled out of my thoughts by Isabel expressing, “Ooooh I love this part!”

“What?”

“Shhh listen!”

Someone was playing the piano.

([x](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H2-1u8xvk54)) 

“You guys have a piano?”

“Yeah you’ve probably never seen it, though, cuz I’ve never taken you in that room before. C’mon, I’ll show you!”

She was up and out the door before I could even get off the chair. The room was on the opposite side of the living room, which made sense. I had passed the doorway dozens of times but had never gone in.

The room had two couches and an upright piano pushed against the wall.

Levi was sitting at the piano with his back turned towards us.

Isabel had already seated herself on one of the sofas and I followed suit.

 He was good...like really good. I didn’t recognize the song he was playing, but that didn’t really surprise me.

And it sounded hella nice.

I wished I could play piano. Or really any instrument; I’ve always loved music.

Especially after watching [La Corda D’oro](http://myanimelist.net/anime/1579/Kiniro_no_Corda:_Primo_Passo) and [Shigatsu wa Kimi no Uso](http://myanimelist.net/anime/23273/Shigatsu_wa_Kimi_no_Uso).

Of course, after watching those shows the only pieces I know on the piano are freaking Chopin.

From every single anime I’ve ever watched, whenever someone sits down at a piano, if it’s a girl she’s gonna play moonlight sonata. If it’s a guy, he’s gonna bust out some Chopin Nocturne.

Or you know, Ave Maria.

That one's pretty popular, I’ve heard it a few times in various anime.

The piece ended and Levi turned to survey his audience.

He pulled a face when he saw me.

“I’d say I didn’t know you were here, but I’d be lying. I started playing to drown out the sound of your God-awful voice. You have the volume level of a foghorn when you speak, you know that?”

And to think the last time we saw each other he smiled at me.

Not that our relationship ever made any improvements really, and it didn’t exactly matter because Halloween was in a few days anyway.

“And to think I was just about to compliment you. Already insulting me!” I humphed.

He snorted in response.

Isabel ignored the tension between us entirely.

“You’re not gonna stop after just that are you?!”

Levi’s attention was turned to her.

“Well, what else would you like to hear?”

Isabel looked at me expectantly.

“Oh no Izzy I don’t think he wants a request from me!”

“Oh c'mon, he was just playing Comptine d’Un Autre Été. He only plays that when he’s in a good mood.”

“Camp d’ what?”

“It’s a piece that Yann Tiersen wrote for the film Amelie, you uncultured swine,” Levi stated while glaring down at me like I was a lesser human being.

I was about to ask if Amelie was that famous French movie, but given the fact that the name of the song was most definitely French and the fact that Levi would think I was even more mentally challenged if I asked, I decided not to.

He hadn't rebutted Isabel’s claim that he was in a good mood –even though I sure as hell couldn’t tell the difference between his mood now and his normal mood- which meant I could still pick any song I wanted. So…

“Can you play Beethoven’s Moonlight Sonata?” ([x](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Tr0otuiQuU))

He raised his eyebrows at me. “Well props to you for knowing a Beethoven, I’m proud of you brat.” His voice was dripping with sarcasm.

“Hey! I know Chopin too!”

At this he smirked. “Your pronunciation skills are as horrifying as ever, but at least you were close. Or closer than ‘Coat Dee Nweet’”

I would’ve yelled something back at him but he was already turning around to face the piano again.

“You said you wanted Moonlight Sonata? Fine.”

He began to play again.

It was definitely Beethoven’s Moonlight Sonata. I was pretty surprised that he had actually obliged my request.

Isabel and I were both completely spellbound.

Staring at Levi’s long fingers as they moved across the piano was absolutely mesmerizing. The piece was beautiful. I ended up staring at Levi’s back too. He was swaying slightly and I was pretty impressed that he hadn’t made a single mistake and was playing the entire thing from memory.

We stayed like that until Levi played the low chord symbolizing the end. Except he didn’t pull his hands away from the ivory keys. He paused briefly and exhaled slowly. I was about to move, but then his fingers were pushing down the keys again, creating a torrent of sound. It was so fast. His fingers were a blur, but my eyes greedily followed them. I’m pretty sure my mouth was hanging open too. It was just absolutely breath taking. He grew louder and then returned to a suspenseful quiet with ease. The new song lasted even longer than the first, but I wasn’t complaining at all. Levi’s back muscles also shifted as he played and his hands always knew exactly where to go.  I sat gaping at him for the entirety of the performance. It was much more impressive than the Moonlight Sonata.

He struck the last three chords and majestically finished the piece.

Isabel immediately started clapping. “Hoooray!!!”

I’m pretty sure I was still gawking until he turned around and told me I looked like I needed to shit really badly.

“What was that?” I managed to ask after coming out of my stupefied state.

“What do you mean what was that? It was Moonlight Sonata, dumbass. You know the piece you asked me to play?”

“Well yeah I mean the first part was Moonlight Sonata, but what was the really fast part with the blududududDADUNs! I mean it was really impressive don’t get me wrong, but I just don’t…”

He was giving me the ‘you’re stupid’ face again. But then he let out a smile.

“To be honest, I wasn’t expecting you to know that movement anyways. Most people who claim they love the Moonlight Sonata don’t even realize that the piece has three movements. The first movement may be the most popular, but the third one has always been my favorite.”

“Three?”

“Yes, three.” He said with a roll of his eyes. “I skipped the second one. It’s too happy.” He shrugged his shoulders.

“All right brats, show's over,” he said getting to his feet and stretching out his arms and back.

That was its own show right there.

He looked pretty damn hot.

Okay, moving the fuck on.

Isabel and I got to our feet as well.

“Alright c'mon Eren! Back to work!” As she was dragging me out of the room she paused and quickly turned back to look at Levi.

“By the way big bro,” She started innocently. “You smiled again.”

And with that we were on our way. Leaving Levi behind muttering something about how brats were so fucking annoying.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Clannad: After Story  
> Shokugeki no Souma (Food Wars)  
> La Corda D’oro  
> Shigatsu wa Kimi no Uso.
> 
> Annnndddd food wars.  
> The dish is from the 3rd episode as is "the chef who doesn't smile." no it's not a spoiler. We're talking about the beginning of the show not the freaking all time cooking final championships. It's aaaalllll gooooood
> 
> I put the link in the actual chapter as Clannad, but the reference itself is more Clannad: After Story. Does it matter? Pssshhh not really no. I think Clannad After Story is more popular anyway.
> 
> Lots of general anime stuff.  
> Like how all the chicks love to play Moonlight Sonata and how anime makers LOVE Chopin. Chopin is the go-to. No Debussy or Lizt, just Chopin. All of the Chopin. Plus Ave Maria. Dear Lord the number of times I've heard Ave Maria is enough to make me bang my head on a wall. Im looking at you La Corda D'oro!!!


	8. There are times in a man’s life when he must STRIP!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "There are times in a man’s life when he must STRIP!" -Gray Fullbuster
> 
> It is finally Halloween. Which means that everyone is running around getting ready and there's makeup everywhere and everyones choking on hairspray (Sounds like a musical production). Isabel finally gets to show off her costume that she and Eren have been working on and hopefully she can pull a scare out of at least Farlan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again! Already on chapter 8 wahooo! So I'm actually posting a little earlier than I usually do which is a good thing. And I'm probably going to do absolutely nothing tomorrow except for set candles on fire and eat birthday cake. Because tomorrow is my birthday. ヾ(＠⌒▽⌒＠)ﾉ.
> 
> So Happy Birthday to anyone else celebrating their birthday in August. I got you an update as a present if you are! 
> 
> Also when you guys leave comments my heart goes doki doki and then explodes. I love it.

“Isabel! [SIT!](http://s209.photobucket.com/user/Kokoro519/media/SitBoy2.jpg.html)” I was running around like a crazy person. A crazy person holding a curling iron. ([x](http://myanimelist.net/anime/249/InuYasha))

Isabel would be heading off to the big Halloween party in an hour so Mikasa and I were bustling around getting her ready to go. Mika was handling her face while I took care of her hair. I was curling it [Yuina Wakura](https://www.animecharactersdatabase.com/character.php?id=25276) style: the little bun in the back and everything([x](http://myanimelist.net/anime/9289/Hanasaku_Iroha)). The hairstyle would look great with the dress; after all, it was elegant, simple, and matched the old-fashioned bride style.  And it would look even better once we messed it up a little and put some fake blood in it.

We brought over bags with everything we needed to get ready for our own party as well. We’d get Isabel ready and in return, we would use her hairspray, flat iron, and anything else that we could find.

The smell of hairspray in the air was suffocating. If someone came in here with a lighter we would all explode like a fucking firecracker.

“Don't move. Izzy I said DON’T MOVE! God, it’s like you’re trying to get me to burn your ear off or something. Now sit still!”

As Mikasa and I finished we both carefully looked her over. Her hair was matted with blood and her face was completely paled out and definitely looked dead.

“You look fucking fantastic! Mika, we’re amazing.”

Mikasa nodded in agreement. “Hell yes we are. You look perfect Isabel.”

“I want a mirror! I want a mirror!”

And the flutter queen was off again.

Watching her run around in the costume was absolutely hilarious. She really did look like a headless bride. And the blood looked super realistic, curtsey of yours truly. I may or may not have taken dozens of pictures with my camera. This was a masterpiece and the only thing I had to document it was a picture, which was pretty sad.

I wiped the sweat from my forehead. It was time for Mikasa and me to start getting ready too. Well Mikasa. I was already pretty much ready to go. We were going to head over to Jean’s later, but with the makeup Mikasa had planned for her costume, it would definitely take her a while to get ready.

She was really putting her skills to the test with this one.

Mikasa was dressing up as a Japanese [doll](https://www.google.com/search?q=japanese+doll&biw=1240&bih=601&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0CAYQ_AUoAWoVChMI5tCEsMqixwIVidGACh1SFAwH#imgrc=_riglneW6qPCGM%3A), but painting her face so that it looked like it was cracking. She had done a few test runs and it always looked super cool.

But it took a few hours.

I couldn’t wait to see everyone else’s costumes too. Farlan was already in his groom costume. We had decided to pale his face out and make it look like his throat was slit. This way he and Isabel matched a little better. But God, what a violent wedding.

Because of time constraints, I had gone simple this year.

Changing into my costume would take me less than 10 minutes… mostly because I was already wearing a lot of it. Levi had been so kind as to remind me of that fact when he opened the front door…

“What the fuck happened to your head?”

“Hi Levi, so good to see you too. You’re looking as well-rested and happy as ever.”

I walked past him and dragged Mikasa in behind me as she sputtered about being more respectful when entering someone else’s house.

Oh well.

For now I was just sitting at the kitchen counter waiting for Isabel to make her grand entrance.

“Tch. Jaeger, this better be the best fucking costume I’ve ever seen in my life to warrant the amount of time I’ve been forced to spend looking at your face.”

I sighed and rolled my eyes.

“And who the fuck lets you out of the house looking like that?”

“Are we really still talking about the hair?”

“No dipshit. The outfit’s even worse than the hair.”

So as far as my head went, my hair was actually dyed black at the moment. It would wash out eventually. And I was also wearing pants that were slightly tinted green. And had a chain on the side. Plus a T-shirt.

Between Mikasa, Isabel, and myself, no matter what shirt I was wearing, at the end of the day it would have stains on it from paint and makeup. So I had opted to wear a T-shirt that I didn’t completely care about. It just happened to say, “[Hug Me If you Hate Anime](http://ih1.redbubble.net/image.37282494.1844/fig,black,mens,ffffff.jpg).”

“Are you trying to get a hug out of me? Because that’s absolutely pathetic and borderline disturbing.”

I rolled my eyes at him.

“You’re welcome to try and hug me if you want. But I should warn you, there’s a reason why I wear this shit and it’s not to fraternize the enemy.”

He raised his eyebrows. “Oh, well then, care to enlighten me?” He was leaning on the opposite side of the counter staring at me.

“It’s more efficient to let your enemies come to you. Plus, people are very vulnerable in the midst of a hug.” I pointed out. He seemed mildly amused.

“But aren’t you betraying your own cause by pretending to be one of the enemy?”

“To defeat evil I will become an even greater evil!”

He looked at me like I was a complete idiot.

“I still think this is your absolutely desperate way to get chicks to hug you, shitty brat.”

“Hey, I have absolutely no need for chicks to hug me.”

He gave me a condescending look, “But aren’t people oh-so-vulnerable in the midst of a hug?”

“God! Don’t be an Ass! I told you I’m not looking for chicks. Now if you wanna play the game where we piss each other off, I can play all day, but that’s going to totally ruin Isabel's night and I have been working way too fucking hard for that to happen! Got it?!”

Sure I’ve got a temper, but I was really trying my best to hold it down because once I go over the edge, there’s no going back until someone pulls me off the bastard that pissed me off…or knocks me out. We’d discovered this the hard way a few times from my fights with Jean.

 “So, where’s Isabel?”

Good timing as always, Farlan.

“Admiring herself in the mirror at the moment, she’ll come out when she’s ready. Mikasa’s changing in there too…which is why I’m out here.”

Farlan nodded and, even though he didn’t say anything, he obviously felt the tension between Levi and me.

“So uhhh is this tea?” Farlan gestured to the pot on the stove.

Levi let out an exasperated sigh “Yes, it’s black tea.” With that, his anger and energy visibly dissipated. “Get me one too.”

Farlan grabbed two teacups and filled them up. It was as he was bringing the two cups to the counter that Isabel made her appearance.

All she said was “Farlan.” In a soft voice.

But it was perfect.

He looked up a little startled and _screamed_ , his cry magnified by the sound of shattering glass. It was a complete success. Sure, the part about shattering glass wasn’t part of the original plan, but it certainly made things a whole lot cooler.

I had also been able to see Levi’s expression as Isabel entered. Naturally, he had seen her before she said anything, but the look of astonishment on his face was amazing and he had definitely been shocked into silence.

Although that surprise didn’t last long and was quickly replaced by an emotion I was much more familiar. The anger was definitely back.

He formed his words with care, “Farlan, please tell me that it’s not black tea I feel on the back of my pants.”

“Ummm, it probably is.”

Levi nodded slowly. “And that isn’t my favorite teacup shattered on the floor by any chance, is it?”

“Yep it is. Though if it makes you feel any better mine is there too.”

With that confirmed, the anger fully emerged and his glare reached a deathly height. He directed it straight at…me? _What the fuck?_

“Wait, I didn’t do anything!” I defended with my hands up in a warding stance.

He continued glaring at me, “You were here and you definitely did that,” he pointed at Isabel. “Which caused this,” he gestured to the mess I could only imagine, behind him. “Which resulted in this!” He gestured to himself with one hand to show his current mood, and with his other hand pointed to the back of his pants, which he had brought out from behind the counter to show that it was splattered with tea.

“Umm, I still fail to see how this is my fault.”

“I feel like blaming you. Not to mention your horrible luck, so as far as I fucking care, it’s your damn fault.” He huffed at me. Well, this was new. Levi was acting immature. It was actually kind of entertaining.

“Umm Levi,” Farlan started, “You know this is actually my—”

Levi waved his hand dismissively. “Whatever the fuck. I might as well go fucking change into my costume now that I _have_ to get out of these fucking pants.” With that, he turned and was out of the kitchen in the blink of an eye.

“You know, he was surprisingly not mad.” Isabel pondered.

“Maybe it just hasn’t fully sunk in that his favorite teacup is smashed.” Farlan supplied.

“True, maybe we should wait and see until tomorrow morning.”

“Yeah I agree. And will you stop talking with your head turned sideways like that; it looks creepy as fuck and it’s super disturbing. You look like you have blood all over you. How the fuck did you make that shit look so real?”

With that Isabel smiled and nodded my way.

“Good job man. That’s super impressive. You’re quite a skilled guy.”

“Why thank you. I’m glad that some people appreciate my many talents.” At that, we all laughed.

We continued our friendly banter until Levi came back in the room fully dressed as a vampire.

“Da-aa-aammmmn.” Isabel catcalled in her own sing-songy way while Farlan groaned something like, “again Levi?”

“I haven't had time to make one ad there's no way in fuck I'm buying a costume from a store.”

“Well, next year we can have Eren make _you_ one!”

 “ _Fuck_ no!”

“But seriously can we at least switch it up a little?”

“Well Levi, I get that you’re already pretty pale, but Mikasa’s got her makeup bag here and we’ve been putting blood on everyone else, so if you’re willing I can do your makeup.” I offered.

“I know how to do my own makeup, brat.”

“Oh c’mon Levi, you can see how amazing Isabel looks. Just let him at it. He’s pretty fucking talented!”

With that kind of reassurance, Levi actually agreed. Sure it was a little begrudgingly, but hey, he was literally giving me permission to attack his face with almost sharp objects (that weren’t sharp at all, but in my mind, I could certainly pretend they were).

“Eren,” Isabel stopped me. “You know, not to be a buzz kill, but shouldn’t you worry about your own costume before you start doing Levi’s makeup?”

I ripped my shirt off to reveal the metal necklace, blue painted-on fairy tattoo, and strategically placed bandages beneath it. And, of course, my abs.[***](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PJ_QgB7bAnM)

“Oi, what the fuck?”

“There are times in a man’s life when he must STRIP! I just have to pop in the black eye contacts and mess up my hair a little more and I’m good to go.”

“But it’s such a shame to cover up your green eyes!” Was Isabel’s initial reaction. She came a little closer and then the second reaction hit. “Shit shit shit! That’s so fucking cool. Your costume is perfect.”

“And….his costume is?” Farlan was the one to ask.

“A half naked man wearing green paints.” Levi deadpanned

Isabel scowled at him.

“He’s [Gray](http://fairytail.wikia.com/wiki/Gray_Fullbuster) from [Fairy Tail](http://myanimelist.net/anime/22043/Fairy_Tail_\(2014\)), it’s one of those anime.” Mikasa answered him, making her appearance. It was starting to get a little more crowded in the kitchen, but it was nice.

Apparently, Levi agreed with me on the crowded part, but not so much the nice part.

“Okay, everybody out. If you want to have a group gathering do it in the family room.”

With that, we all started exiting.

“Hey, Levi,” I gestured towards the backroom as we left the kitchen. He sighed but still followed me.

“Holy shit. These chemicals could fucking kill someone.” He grumbled as we entered the room, the air still heavy.

“Just sit down, be quiet, and hold still,” I ordered as I got the makeup and tools I would need organized in a neat clump next to where Levi was sitting. He shot me a glare, but surprisingly didn’t bother with a retort.

“Now I used some of these brushes on Isabel. I know you like your cleanliness, but I figured that since you’re family you wouldn’t care as much.”

“I honestly don’t think you’ll give me a fucking choice anyway.”

“Nope.”

We stayed silent for a while—me holding Levi’s face as I applied eyeliner to him. He stood surprisingly still, which made me think that this was not the first time he’d worn it. Which come to think of it, didn’t really surprise me. Hell, I’ve worn eyeliner before. And not just on Halloween…(why do I admit these things?)

“You wouldn’t by any chance be willing to put a shirt on, brat?”

“Why? Does me shirtless make you feel uncomfortable?”

“Get your fucking head out of your ass kid.”

“Oh c’mon, I’ve worked hard to get these abs and fuck me if I can’t show them off once in a while. And plus, I don’t really wanna call you out on this, but you work in the fashion industry, I’d bet a couple hundred bucks that you see half naked guys like _ALL the time_!”

He made one of those 'Tch' noises but didn’t argue or correct me. I couldn’t help smirking a little.

“Wipe that fucking grin off your face, Jaeger.”

“You know my last name?”

“I’ve known since our little café incident. Your dumbass friend called you Jaeger. It was pretty fucking obvious.”

I laughed. “I wouldn’t call it our ‘little’ café incident. I mean give me a little more credit, you were fucking pissed out of your mind.”

“And you were terrified.”

“Yes, yes I was. But never again.” I paused. “‘Cause you’re actually not that scary.”

“Oh? Are you sure?”

“Yep pretty damn sure.” I laughed

“The bastards up at Recon Corps would love you.” He scoffed.

“Really? Why?”

He smirked. “All the interns and newbies we have are terrified of me.”

“Wow, that’s a little sad.”

“Actually, Mikasa may be an exception to that. That’s probably one of the reasons why Hanji likes her so much.”

“Are you referring to Ms. Hanji Zoë?”

“The one and only. Unless you know any other Hanji’s?” He sighed, “If you do, don’t you dare tell me. I don’t own enough alcohol to deal with just the one as it is.”

“Damn. I can personally say after looking through your wine fridge that you own _a lot_ of alcohol.”

“Yes I do. And now you know the reason why.” He laughed. “You should see the stash I have at the office.”

I made a face at him.

“Relax brat, I’m kidding.”

I laughed, “With your face, who knows? That’s why the interns are scared of you, remember? But I bet it’s great for kicking their asses into action.”

He smirked. “Oh you have no idea. I-”

He stopped himself abruptly and looked at the door. I stopped applying the makeup to his neck to see what it was that had caught his attention.

He motioned for me to be quiet and listen.

Sure enough, muffled voices could be heard.

“No, I swear they were talking. I heard smiling!”

“Isabel you can’t _hear_ smiling.”

“Be quiet Mikasa, you’re such a killjoy.”

“Yeah c’mon Mikasa, even you have to be a little curious what they’re talking about.”

“You realize I can just ask Eren later, right?”

“But don’t you want to know now? Besides he’s all alone in there with Levi, he might be in danger, shouldn’t you know what they’re saying _just in case?”_

“Eren can handle himself. I’ve kicked his ass enough times for him to know some moves. And he gets himself into plenty of fights. Sure, I have to yell at him afterward for his impulsiveness, but he can defend himself. Long enough to come get me if need be.”

        

“Wow, you really are a killjoy. Whatever.”

Unfortunately for Isabel and Farlan, Levi was done eavesdropping on _their_ conversation. We had been quietly staring at the door unmoving so that they wouldn’t realize we had heard them. Levi had stood up smoothly and made his way over to the door without making a sound. In one swift motion, he opened the door and two bodies came tumbling in with a yelp.

“Well, what do we have here?”

“Oh hi Levi! Tell ya what big bro, that make-up actually looks really good on you! Like I love sayin, you really are the Queen of winged eyeliner! And the blood looks reeaaaally creepy! You make a very sexy vampire, yes yes _very_ sexy in fact I think you will be the single most sexiest vampire at the party! You put both [Kaname](http://media.animevice.com/uploads/0/4/600-vampire_knight_01___208.jpg) and [Zero](http://vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/vampireknight/images/8/88/Zero21.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20100703111828) to absolute shame! Now I know you don’t know who those guys are, but they are very sexy vampires and I want you to know that I think you’re sexier.” She was enthusiastically nodding along as she babbled.([x](http://myanimelist.net/anime/3457/Vampire_Knight))

Levi watched her with an amused expression.

“If you’re done rolling around on the floor, feel free to get off your ass.”

“You know that actually hurt, but thanks for asking if I was okay. Gee, I’ll send you tumbling into a room with both your arms trapped at your sides by a wedding dress and see how you feel.”

“You know Isabel I don’t think you’re going to ever realize that dream.” Farlan said climbing to his feet and pulling Isabel up with him.

“Well, we’re all done in here anyway I guess. Unless you want some blood on your gloves too?”

“Nah I’m good. We need to head out soon anyway. I fucking hate being late.”

With that, he strode out of the room.

Okay whatever man, no problem.

“Sooo… what were you two talking about.” Great, now I was her new target.

“Nothing much. Shouldn’t you two get going?”

“Yes we should. And so should you. You sure you’re not going to be cold walking around half naked in October?” Farlan asked.

“Yeah, I’m good. Between my car and the party I’ll be outside for like 10 seconds tops.”

“Alright. Well enjoy yourself.” Farlan began pushing Isabel out of the room.

“You too,” I called.

Farlan briefly popped his head back in the room.

“By the way, just throwing this out there, we plan to kidnap you and force you to cook for us again sometime. But next time you can actually bring Mikasa with you so the two of you can stay and eat with us!”

“Well Thanksgiving is November 26,” I said, I was caught a little off guard.

“No way man! I can’t wait that long! If I lied and said my birthday is next week, would you do it?”

“Maybe. We’ll see. I have classes to go to I’ll have you know. And this thing called work. But I promise Mikasa and I will come over on Thanksgiving if you want us to.”

“Well duh, we want you!”

“FARLAN! I will send you to an early grave!” We both heard Levi yell.

“Okay, okay, I’m coming!” He yelled back.

He shot me one last look, “But seriously man, Dinner.” And then he was off.

“So Mika, you ready?”

She was sitting in the exact same place she had been when Levi and I left. I couldn’t help but laugh.

“Ever thought that you have too much faith in me?”

“Oh please, the only faith I have in you is your ability to start yelling when you get pissed off. It’s mostly faith in my ability to move quickly and save your ass.”

“Wow thanks. And I don’t know Mikasa, could you really have saved my ass dressed like that?”

She was completely in costume. The kimono looked great but definitely restricting.

“All I would need to beat someone up is my fan.” She said with a flick of her wrist. A blood red fan with gold designs appeared from nowhere and opened up in her hand. She began twirling and flipping it effortlessly.

“You’re terrifying.”

“How so?”

“I doubt a fan is the only thing you’re hiding in there. The poor bastard that tries to hit on you tonight is gonna regret it.”

She couldn’t hold back her grin.

“Someone replaced the sister I was supposed to have with a Japanese assassin.”

“I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anime:  
> Inuyasha  
> Hanasaku Iroha  
> Code Geass  
> Fairy Tail  
> Vampire Knight
> 
>  
> 
> um wow okay so theres only a few...  
> I think theres going to start being more general stuff. And for this chapter and the dinner one before it, it was really dedicated to one anime.  
> I actually figured it would be such a waste to have vampire Levi and not do a reference to Vampire Knight.


	9. Make Pasta Not War

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Make Pasta Not War - Hetalia
> 
> Armin and Eren spend some time hanging out because Eren has seriously missed being with his best friend. Levi also gets a little action in with his best friend Hanji. And of course Eren follows through with his promise to Farlan that he would cook for him and his family again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow so there's a couple POV switches which just kinda happened. They just did. (Also I think I'll have more time to write so expect another update soon!)
> 
> As always: Enjoy!

“No Armin, you can’t make this better.”

“Oh c’mon Eren—"

“I can’t believe you just ditched me!”

“Shhhh stop yelling. I did nothing wrong.”

“Yeah yeah and neither did [Homura](https://www.google.com/search?q=Homura&biw=1280&bih=611&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0CAYQ_AUoAWoVChMI7oTw6byxxwIVimk-Ch0PxgLs#imgrc=E0DRwuUh4aPHAM%3A). Bull.”

“Are we really going to have this talk right now?”

“Hells yeah we are, I’m mad at you. First you missed FMA Day and hey, you know what, I understand. It’s October 3rd and you have school and shit, that’s fine, I re-watched our favorite episodes by myself. But seriously man, skippin out on Halloween?”

Truth is, I wasn’t actually mad about Armin missing the Halloween party. The part that got me was the fact that he hadn’t bothered to tell me ahead of time.

Lately we had barely had time to really sit down and talk. It was always rushed phone calls or short text messages.

I had been really looking forward to seeing him.

And had received the bitch slap of disappointment right after I got to the party and saw the text saying he wasn’t coming.

“I ended up talking to Jean. Do you know how horrible that was?” I kept my voice down for his sake.

Armin laughed, “It couldn’t have been that bad.”

“Yes it was because it only lasted like an hour and then he and Marco ran off to go make out somewhere.”I huffed.

“Shouldn’t you be glad he ran off? Wait they actually hooked up?”

“Yeah like last week. Damn you really are out of the loop, it’s super unlike you." 

He blushed furiously. “I’ve just been busy with other things, ok?" 

I snickered. “Other _things._ ”

“Eren stop.” He hid his face under a pillow.

“So how is that _thing_ you keep thinking about? Is his eyebrow game still strong?” 

His voice was muffled by the pillow. “He’s good.”

“And what about you? Are you good?” 

The pillow bobbed up and down.

“You look happy Armin, well not _right now_ per se, but I want to hear it straight from your mouth. Mikasa and I both love you, so if Eyebrows ever needs some ass kicking you know who to call.”

“Yeah, I know to call Mikasa,” he stated emerging from behind his fluffy shield.

“Yeah, or you can call me and I’ll call Mikasa.”

We both laughed. My ass kicking skills weren’t lacking, but seriously, calling Mika just gets the job done faster and cleaner. And it still yields very satisfying results.

“I’m doing wonderfully, Eren, thanks for your concern.” He murmured closing his eyes and leaning back.

He re-opened one and glanced over at me.

“Are you really just going to call him Eyebrows?”

“Well I haven’t thought of anything else that really sticks yet. I mean with Levi, it was like DAMN Satan! But Angel-man doesn’t seem appropriate and he’s not like Phinks at all and I’m not calling him Captain. Like for Captain America. I’d rather call him Commander, if anything. He doesn’t look like a Captain.”

“Well, speaking of Levi, the reason why I say it’s weird for you to call him ‘Eyebrows’is because that’s what Levi calls him.”

“Wait, seriously?”

“Well, among other more colorful names.”

“Fuck. Now I really do have to think of something else. Ugh, I’ll Google it later. My brain isn’t working right now.”

Armin giggled. “That implies that there are times when it does work.”

I threw a pillow at his head.

...“Actually man, can I have that back? That was comfy.”

“Pffffff no. This mine now.” He cemented his claims by tucking the pillow behind him and adding it to his collection. 

I sighed. “I really don’t mind hanging with the gang, just next time you bail on me, a day's notice would be nice.”

“I know Eren. I’m so sorry. I swear I’ll never do that again.”

“I know, I'm not actually angry or anything. Besides, everyone fucks up and makes mistakes—it was just a very un-Armin-like mistake. I was worried.”

He gave me a smile. “Thank you, Eren.”

“So how was the party anyway?”

“It was actually really fun. You should’ve seen Isabel. She got quite the treat for having the best costume.”

My head snapped up. “Really?”

He reached into his back pocket, shifting all the pillows that were cluttered around us. Pulling out his phone, he tossed it to my side of the couch with a, “Here. Look.”

Sure enough, he had his pictures pulled up and the most recent ones were of Isabel. She was smiling next to Erwin who was giving her an envelope.

“She won a hundred bucks. It was super funny when she went up to get her prize. At first, she was going to just hold the check in her mouth and then Farlan ran up and grabbed it for her. But Erwin was about to just tuck it behind her head because he didn’t know what to do with it.”

“Oh God, I would’ve paid to see that shit. Wait, they went to Erwin’s party?”

“Yeah, you dummy. Erwin and Levi are besties. And Hanji. Erwin was pretty excited to introduce me to them. I talked to Levi for a bit, he didn’t say much, but he was nice to me,” he said with a shrug.

I scoffed. “Figures.”Armin had nothing to do with our spit spats. Of course Armin could get Satan to be nice to him. He could also get super rich dudes to date him and invite him to their parties. Dammit.

“When Isabel got voted best costume, she gave you a shoutout. It was pretty cute.”

“Awwwww.” It was actually really sweet that she remembered me in her moment of glory and fame. 

Needless to say, I was pretty damn proud of her for winning. Well, I was proud of myself, too; that costume was like a fucking walking masterpiece. Isabel had the vision and I helped her with the execution. It was a fucking masterpiece for both of us.

“And I guess you and Levi got to spend a lot of time together too.” He gave me a sideways look. “I saw his makeup. It was very….Eren.”

I smirked. Armin knew me well.

“Yes, as a matter of fact, I did do his makeup. You of all people would recognize my vampire style, considering I perfected it on you.”

When Armin dressed up as a vampire one year, I had thrown a fit yelling that if he didn’t put makeup on to complete the look, I would disown him.

“Levi Ackerman let you do his makeup?”

“Damn right. I did Farlan’s too. And I did a fine job if I may say so.”

“You did. He looked like a really sexy vampire.”

“Kicked [Alucard](https://www.google.com/search?q=alucard&biw=1280&bih=611&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&sqi=2&ved=0CAYQ_AUoAWoVChMI7NLHnr-xxwIVRhs-Ch3HkAFu#imgrc=q-fmrMWYXBnVyM%3A)’s ass to the curb.”([x](http://myanimelist.net/anime/270/Hellsing))

Armin laughed.“I should hope so. Speaking of an ass getting kicked to the curb, do you think Thomas will ever recover?”

“Pffff, he got it rough. I knew some dumbass would hit on Mika.”I sighed. “You shoulda seen her in person, though, she looked amazing. Pictures really don’t do her costume justice.”

“You did, too, from what I saw. It’s a shame you had to dye your hair, though. You look better with brown.”

“Hey, if I had picked [Natsu](https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRwtxIzCK_8hFK_yV8xQ-5U14OCANZDAAhwZwBVouPcBbDaYsakMA) instead of Gray, my hair would've been Flamingo pink.”

“You know Eren, there are these amazing things that people invented called wigs. You should really try them out sometime.”

I waved him off. “I’d rather just dye my hair than buy a fucking pink wig and then never wear it again.”

“Point taken.”

We lay there in silence for a little while.

“Wanna get some coffee later?” I asked lazily.

“Yeah sure, but later, my head is still throbbing.”

I couldn't help but smirk, “Kay.”

  

**Levi POV**

“Leeevvviiii.” I held up my hand to stop her before she could come any closer.

“You know the drill.”

She flounced over to the side of the office and pulled out a bottle of scotch and a glass. She brought it to the desk.

I glanced up.

“No, not that drill, you shithead! God, it’s not even passed noon yet, who the hell do you take me for?”

“But you’re still going to drink it," she said pointedly and started making herself comfortable on the edge of my desk.

“Oh no, you don’t,” I snapped, “This changes nothing.” I pointed at the door.

She huffed at me but got up and walked back to the door, shut it, and knocked on it.

“Come in, asshat.”

“Hi Levi, long time no see.” She made her way back over.

"You don’t have to be such a grumpy troll all the time. I thought you’d be happy today. It’s after Halloween remember? I don’t have to listen to you whine about Eren being in your house ‘all the fucking time’ anymore.”

“I never whined about Eren. I expressed my strong dislike for the shitty brat.”

Hanji clicked her tongue, “Whatever you say, sugar.”

I threw a death glare at her as she came over and propped herself on the edge of my desk once more. 

“Uh uh, honey, you know that doesn’t work on me,” she said flicking my forehead.

“You should be grateful I haven’t slipped a laxative into your food yet, shitty four-eyes.”

She scoffed, "Though speaking of a certain ‘shitty brat,’ I have to say I was a little surprised when I saw you at the party.”

“And why the fuck would that be? I wore the same fucking costume I always do.”

She wagged her index finger at me. “The costume was the same, but you switched it up. And there’s no way you would’ve done your own makeup just like that. Which means someone else did your makeup. And whoever did yours also did Farlan’s. It was the same touch. And a certain prize winner did do a shout out to one Eren Jaeger, so he was definitely at your house helping at least _one_ person get ready.”

She raised her eyebrows with a slight smirk playing on her lips.

I rolled my eyes at her. “It was Mikasa.”

“Yep, sure it was.”

“Tch. If you’re not willing to accept the fucking answer, don’t ask the fucking question.” 

“Alright fine.” She sang, holding her hands up in surrender.

“So did you come into my fucking office to talk about my beautiful fucking face and some shitty brat?”

She shrugged her shoulders nonchalantly. “Who knows, maybe I just wanted to talk.”

“Like fuck you did. I know you and you always have some kind of fucking scheme planned out. You and Erwin are the same; I don’t know why I’m even friends with you damn bastards.”

“Hey, don’t compare me to him. We all know I’m much more fun to be around,” she pouted. 

“Oi, mope later, let’s fucking hear it.”

She sighed. “It’s always down to business with you. Well,” She [pushed up her glasses](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A0YBZ5CSYLU), “it's actually concerning Mikasa Ackerman. More specifically, it’s concerning the magazines we sent to a certain Eren Jaeger.”

I felt my brows furrow. “I don’t see the connection.”

“Neither did I.”

“They’re definitely friends… So he complained to her about the magazines.”

“Not quite, but close.”

“I heard him complaining to Isabel about them, so I wouldn’t be surprised if he told Mikasa too. It was pretty fucking amusing. He really didn’t like Girls and Corpses in particular; that one was all you.”

Hanji had played her hand picking most of the magazines, but a few of them had been my doing. How she had gotten me aboard this fucking plan was still a mystery. But it had been entertaining...

“Why, thank you.” She took a mock bow. “But the point is Mikasa approached me asking for advice on solving the problem for herself.” She gave me a look. “Levi, she and Eren are definitely living together.”

“As friends or…”

“Now, that much I don’t know.”

“Oh? Now this is surprising. You didn’t pry? When has Hanji Zoë ever refrained from prying?"

She let out a laugh. “You know I don’t pry when I know it’s pointless. Mikasa’s the kind of girl who doesn’t reveal things when you snoop. She’s like you. Except I know you well enough to get you to tell me what I want and you know me well enough to tell me.”

“Tch. Because when you pester me, I know you’re going to just keep at it.”

“And that’s all I have to do for you. If I keep pestering, you eventually get sick of it.”

“Because it’s fucking annoying.”

She shrugged her shoulders as if to say _not my problem._

“Either way, Erwin did also grace me with his presence this morning.”

I let out a smirk. “Did Eyebrows finally get sick of all the emails we’ve been sending him?”

“Yes. Yes he did. He already unsubscribed to most of the magazines so I guess our fun was over regardless, but since it affects Mikasa rather directly, I probably would’ve called it off anyway. We both knew from the beginning that this wouldn’t last long. By putting in Erwin’s email for all those subscriptions it was bound to come crashing down sooner rather than later.”

She shrugged again and got up, making her way towards the door. 

“You might want to ask Eren about it," she threw over her shoulder as she left.

Oh, yeah, sure. Like Fuck.

Sure, Mikasa and Eren always came and went together, but I always figured he was just giving her a ride because they lived close by. But they did act very close for friends. Either they had known each other for a _very_ long time or they were more than friends. 

But why the hell should I even bother spending the fucking time to puzzle it over? It was fucking insignificant. Fuck you Hanji, I don’t need to fucking ‘ask Eren’ anything.

The only fucking reason I was perturbed was because I actually liked Mikasa Ackerman; she seemed like a woman with a good head on her shoulders. It would be a shame if she were dating such an immature brat.

Not like it fucking mattered.

**Eren POV**

“And Happy Fake Birthday Farlan.”

“Why thank you, Eren. I’m so glad you and Mikasa could make it to my fake birthday party. I hope you brought cake,” he said with a grin, offering both of us a beer. I gladly accepted and Mikasa traded the box in her hand for the beer. The box did, in fact, have a small cake inside.  
  
“So Eren, whatchya gonna make tonight?”

“What’s the point of a surprise when I just tell you what it is, dumbass?”

“Hey, who the hell said it had to be a surprise?”

 “You did, genius,” Levi called from the kitchen.

“I believe your exact words were, ‘I don’t give a fuck, surprise me.’ Remember?” Isabel chimed in from the couch where she was sprawled out: a laptop in hand and large headphones situated around her neck. There was a beer on the coffee table next to her.

I rolled up my sleeves and went into the kitchen.

Levi was sitting at the counter sipping a beer. 

“You claiming the best seat in the house for the show?”

“Sure brat. Sure," he said, casting me a sideways glance.

He totally was.

I laughed. “Well, watch this for me, 'kay?” I put my beer next to him. I had only been able to take a few sips, but whatever.

I set to work, bustling around and grabbing the pans I would need.  
  
“So, what is it tonight?”

I threw a smile his way. “It’s a surprise, Levi. You’re not special just because you got front row seats.”

“Tch. Piece of shit.” He mumbled.“And what show am I watching exactly?”

“My ass,  _obviously_.” I threw him a killer grin. I was just in time to see him choke a little. I laughed as he shot me a glare and a “shithead.”

“So what’s the conversation for tonight?”

“I don’t give a shit, brat. You know the drill. You talk. If I’m interested, I’ll respond.”

Fair enough.

I do like to talk.

“Well, I’ve been trying to come up with a nickname for Erwin for a little while now.”

“Oh? Eyebrows?”

“Yeah, see, that’s just the thing! I called him Eyebrows—cuz I mean they’re a feature of his face that really stand out—but then Armin told me that that’s what you call him, which means I need to come up with something else. And it’s kind of tough.”

“That’s quite the dilemma you got there.”

I was quiet for a few seconds before glancing over my shoulder to look at him again. Only this time his eyes were cast down. He was definitely looking at my ass. 

“Bastard.”

“What?”

“You know what!”

“Front row seats to the show, remember?” He said with a smug look.

I swear I didn’t blush. 

“The show wasn’t supposed to _actually be my ass,_ you perv.”

He laughed.

It wasn’t loud or anything and it didn’t last very long, but it was a genuine laugh.

And it…sounded nice…I mean as far as laughs go…

I already said I liked his voice…

“Your face is red, brat.”

“It’s the heat from the stove, dumbass, of course my face is red!”

I huffed. “Anyway. So now I have to think of a name that’s not Eyebrows and it’s hard.”

He didn’t make any noise, but I could tell he was listening. 

I didn’t especially know how to deal with the fact that he had definitely been staring at my ass. I probably would’ve just excused it for being a figment of my imagination, but Levi had actually confirmed it. As far as looks go, I’m not bad, so I’ve had people look at my ass before. No big deal, right?

I didn’t want to be awkward, so I just kind of ignored it and kept talking.

 “I refuse to call him Captain America. That’s fucking stupid.”

I kept my eyes in front of me. And it totally wasn’t to hide the fact that I was still blushing

“Well, I did find one guy that totally fits what I was looking for, but it just seems forced because I had to look it up and didn’t come up with it myself. Have you ever heard of [the Big O](http://myanimelist.net/anime/567/The_Big_O)?”

“What the fuck is that?”

I smiled. “I wasn’t expecting you to know it. It’s a show and I only found out it existed last night.”

“That’s one of the most idiotic names I’ve ever heard in my life. It sounds like a shitty five-year-old referring to a fucking toilet.”

“Well, you see, the show's main character is a guy named [Roger Smith](https://www.google.com/search?q=Homura&biw=1280&bih=611&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0CAYQ_AUoAWoVChMI7oTw6byxxwIVimk-Ch0PxgLs#tbm=isch&q=The+Big+O+Roger+Smith). And he’s also known as ‘The Negotiator,’and I mean Erwin seems like he’d be great at that... He was able to convince you not to deck me that one time.” 

“That’s true. Though I don’t know if I would call that negotiation. More like skills in the art of persuasion.”

“Well a negotiator needs to be persuasive.”

“True.” 

“But here’s the best part. Look up a picture on your phone.” 

I heard him pull his phone out of his pocket and begin typing on it.

“What am I supposed to be seeing here brat?”

“Look at his eyebrows.”

“What the fuck?! What are those? Those aren’t even fucking eyebrows. Who the fuck draws that shit?”

“Even though they aren’t bushy like Erwin’s, they’re so…special.”

Levi snorted. “That’s not special, brat. That’s fucked up.” 

I smiled at him. It was so amusing to see his reaction to things. They were always even better than I thought they would be. The way that he scowled and scrunched his nose in disgust was just too fucking hilarious. And how even when he was glaring or looking at something with distaste he still managed to look attractive.

“But like I said it feels a little forced.” 

I sighed. “I think I’m gonna stick with Commander after all. Isn’t he, like, the head Honcho at Recon?”

“Well yeah. Other than Zackley of course.”

I nodded to myself. “I could call him Danchou. I think that’s the best one.”

He shrugged. “Do whatever the fuck you want. I don’t see the fucking appeal with these cartoons." 

“Hey, they’re not cartoons. They’re anime, it’s different.”

“Mmmhmm loser." 

“Hey! Rude!”

I could feel his mocking look on my back.

“So I’m guessing I have some weird-ass anime nickname, too?”

That got me. I glanced at him surprised, a little unsure what to say. “Well, yeah.” 

“Alrighty, let’s hear it brat.”

“You’re the devil.”

His eyebrows shot up. 

“Well, that’s not very Japanese.” 

“No, I suppose not. But there are anime with the devil in it. Like ‘[The Devil is a Part-Timer](http://myanimelist.net/anime/15809/Hataraku_Maou-sama!).’Although that devil is definitely too nice for you. There’s also Satan in Blue Exorcist. But Rin Okumura is my bae, and Satan is his dad, so you being Satan would be making you his father,” I shuddered, “and that’s just fucking weird.” 

I glanced over my shoulder with a pretty good idea of what to expect..

His face was absolutely blank. He sat there blinking at me before shaking his head and taking a long swig of his beer. 

“You’re a complete fucking loser.” He said with an exasperated sigh. Putting his beer back down on the counter.

Yup there it was.

“Okay fine. I don’t fucking care. Stupid Satan.” I said with a grumble.

“Didn’t we just establish that Satan wasn’t a good nickname?”

“Well, I guess I could always revert back to calling you Feitan.” 

“That sounds like Satan.”

“Well, yeah." I said like it was obvious,  "That’s how I got to Satan in the first place.”

“Then were the fuck did you get Feitan from?”

“Your face.” I deadpanned.

“Well fuck.” 

“Yeah, you got the eyes.”

“Are you insulting me?”

“Well the dude in the anime is a boss, but he’s scary as fuck. Picture a ruthless killer that excels in torture.”

 “Eh, not that bad.” He said, taking another drink.

I rolled my eyes. Fucking ridiculous. 

“He’s short, too.” I coughed.

There was the sound of choking behind me before, “I heard that, you fucking shithole!”

“Hey, whatever man.” 

“Yeah, fuck you, brat. Come up with a new fucking name, you ass.”

“Hai Teichou.”

“What the fuck is ‘hi tea choe,' you shitty brat?”

“I didn’t say ‘Hai-Tay-chou’ I said Hai. Teichou. Which is ‘Yes, Captain,’but technically all you would have to say is 'Hai’and that would also mean ‘Yes sir.’ So I guess it’s a little….Although….Heishichou...but Heichou for short...Heichou...”

“”Well, now you have to tell me what the fuck Heichou means anyway.”

 “It can also mean captain, in a way. Basically, a leader of a group in the military... so a Captain or a Corporal.” 

I looked back at him one last time. “Heichou. I like it.” 

“Don’t go decide this shit on your own, you little bastard!” But he didn’t seem all that upset.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anime:  
> Mahou Shoujo Madoka Magica  
> Hellsing  
> Fairy Tail  
> Log Horizon  
> The Big O  
> Hataraku Maou-sama! (The Devil is a Part-TImer!)  
> Blue Exorcist  
> Hunter X Hunter


	10. Law of Equivalent Exchange

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Humankind cannot gain anything without first giving something in return. To obtain, something of equal value must be lost. That is Alchemy's First Law of Equivalent Exchange. -Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood
> 
> Isabel bribes Levi into doing something that he definitely doesn't want to do. And Levi is no coward.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again for the second time this week. Hooray! ヾ(＠⌒▽⌒＠)ﾉ  
> We get some more Eren-Levi time which i'm sure you all will love.
> 
> Enjoy!

**Levi POV**

 

Dinner had been uncomfortably good.

It had ended up being Chicken Tetrazzini: full of flavor and cooked perfectly.

As we were finishing dinner, Isabel had declared that it was much too early for them to go home... which could only mean one thing. So here we all were, back in the living room sprawled on the couches.

Farlan had claimed the recliner and I let him, choosing instead to lounge next to Isabel on one of the couches while Mikasa and Eren took the other one.

Luckily, Farlan had been the one to pick the films this time so were watching some adventure movie and not some dumbass horror flick.

The only real problem was that from this seat if I turned my head slightly, I had the perfect view of a certain little shit that I didn’t want to look at.

His hair was fucking messy, yet his clothes were free of wrinkles and remained un-rumpled even after lounging on the couch. But I only noticed these things because I was fucking looking at him!

It was so fucking annoying.

I hadn’t even been agitated when I heard that Eren was coming over to cook for Farlan’s ‘fake birthday', or whatever the fuck. As a matter of fact, Hanji had said that I looked happy today at work and I almost punched her in the face for it.

I had no idea what the fuck was going on in the movie, considering that I had been spaced out since the damn thing even started.

I glanced over at Eren and Mikasa. She was lying on his shoulder and he was resting his head on hers. They were both definitely still awake and were contently watching the movie.

Hanji’s words from a few days ago came back and echoed in my head. 

So childhood friends or something more…they were definitely more than just mere friends. 

I’ve been friends with Hanji for four years and it’s possible that I could lean against her shoulder…maybe if I was super exhausted. But definitely not for comfort…

...But it also seems unreasonable to compare other people to me...Especially considering that I hate people in general and Eren is definitely extroverted. So Mikasa could still just be a friend. Not necessarily dating right?

It was possible...Even if they do cuddle on other people’s couches. And Eren is a guy and Mikasa’s a girl. And they’re always together. And they live in the same house. And sometimes, they whisper things to each other. And at the table, they shared knowing looks and Mikasa teased him playfully…

I felt a sharp jab to my side. And the shithead responsible was damn lucky I didn’t karate chop their fucking head off as a reflex.

I found Isabel’s face incredibly close to my own when I turned my head.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?" I whispered through gritted teeth.

“I could ask you the same thing, _mon frère_. You’ve been staring at them for _at least_ fifteen minutes and, even then, I might be a little on the conservative side with that estimation.” [mon frère= my brother]

“There is no way in fuck I was staring at Eren, _es-tu devenu compl_ _è_ _tement dingue_?” I whispered back harshly.

[et es-tu devenu dingue?= Did you go crazy? – _Dingue_ can also mean a nutcase or raving mad]

 

She looked me in the eye. “Levi, je n'ai pas parlé d' _Eren, I_ said _them._ You just confirmed it all on your own. _T_ _ê_ _te de n_ _œ_ _urd._ ”

[I didn's say anything about Eren. Head of knots or knot-head directly, but this is the equivalent of calling someone a dickhead.]

 

“Va te faire foutre.” I sighed.

[Go fuck yourself]

 

And now she was looking at me a little concerned.

She glanced between the boy and me.

“Anything you wanna talk about?”

“Absolument rien.”

[absolutely nothing.]

 

“Uh huh, and that’s exactly why you’ve been staring at Eren with a frown on your face.”

I scowled at her.

“You’re dying to know, so just go fucking ask. Tu es une lavette.”

[You’re being a (dishmop), but also refers to a girl who has no courage or is a coward- like calling someone a wimp.]

  
  
“Who the fuck raised you? You’re such a little shit.”

She smiled sweetly at me. 

Fuck everyone.

I looked at her angrily but took the bait.

“Isabel, Ma cher, what exactly is the relationship between Mikasa Ackerman and Eren fucking Jaeger?”

She let out a small laugh. “Well, I’ll start by saying that they certainly aren’t dating, since I know you’ve been pondering that one.” She stated.

I let out a breath I didn’t realize I had been holding. Why the fuck was I holding my breath?

“But Eren’s had a crush on her since he was five.”

My jaw dropped and Isabel clasped a hand over her mouth. Her entire body shook violently and her face turned beet red.

“You little shit.”

“I’m sorry.”She gasped. “But your face, oh my God.”

“I fucking hate you.”

“No, you love me.”

“Yeah, why don’t you keep testing that and see where you end up living.”I glared at her but she just kept giggling.

“Okay okay. I was lying. But don’t you think you should go ask Eren instead of your little sister?” 

“And why the fuck would I do that?” 

“Because it would make a fuck-ton more sense to just ask Eren directly.” She paused and tapped her chin.“How ‘bout we make a deal.”

“What do you want?”

“If you ask Eren directly, I’ll take the hundred dollars I got from Erwin and put it towards a certain someone’s Christmas present.”

“Tch. You think that’ll get me.”

She grinned. “One word for you big bro. _Dyson._ _”_

“You play dirty.”

She laughed again. “Hell no. I’m playing nice right now.”

___________________

 

Eren had already washed the pots and pans he had made from dinner.

He had avidly shoved me away from the sink when I was about to wash them. I almost shoved his balls up his ass but the brat had absolutely insisted on cleaning up is own fucking mess. Not like I could argue with that.

I had inspected the pans when he was done. And had been pleasantly surprised.  The little shit knew how to cook a meal and how to clean a pan. How refreshing.

It was 9 o'clock and we were clearing all the desert plates and bowls of junk food that had been snacked on during the movie.

I had agreed to that dumbass deal Isabel had proposed. I couldn’t deny it; I really wanted a Dyson vacuum cleaner. The damn brat knew my weakness.

I had claimed doing the dishes. I needed time to think about the best way to approach Eren and ~~interrogate~~ ask him to answer some of my questions.

As I pondered, I donned my rubber gloves and grabbed the scrubbing pad. These dishes were going to get one hell of a cleaning.

“Yo Heichou, why don’t you let me wash and you can dry and put away?” 

Well, look who the fuck decided to show up.

“I’ll wash.”

“Well…I don’t really know where things go that well...and I don’t want to put things away wrong or have to ask you every five seconds where shit goes. But I can wash shit. Hey, I just wanted to help okay?”

He shuffled nervously. After a few seconds he couldn't take it anymore.

“Will you fucking say something and stop just staring at me?”

I sighed.

“Fine, you can wash the fucking dishes.”

But it’s a lot harder to run away when you’re washing dishes, brat. You brought this upon yourself.

Because who am I to waste an opportunity?           
  
  
**Eren POV.**  


He had relented pretty easily.

Either my display of dishwashing skills earlier had persuaded him to let me at it, or something else had happened. Maybe he was getting used to having me around! Had he finally come to terms with my friendship with Farlan and Isabel?

If I were in an anime I would be sparkling right now. 

_Focus Eren! If I break a dish Levi will have my ass!_

I felt my cheeks heat up a little.

Levi will have my head damnit! He’ll have my head!

For any other person I would feel fine thinking ' _he’ll have my hide'_ or ' _he’ll have my ass,'_ but with Levi I couldn’t help but feel a little embarrassed. 

Stupid Chibi Satan! This was entirely his fault! If he hadn’t been staring at my ass earlier, I wouldn’t be feeling like this! 

I huffed indignantly. 

I felt Levi shift next to me to give me a look. I quickly thwarted all thoughts from earlier this afternoon in favor of trying to get my face to return to its normal color. If he caught me blushing right now I would have to kill him in order to secure his silence.

We worked quietly; I washed the dishes and he dried them and then put them away. We worked quickly and efficiently together. And for a while, it was nice.

Except for one thing. 

The blatantly obvious awkwardness that was lying just under the surface of the silence.

Levi seemed tense. Like there was something he wanted to say, but at the same time, he seemed incredibly unwilling to have any kind of conversation at all with me, which was why I had opted to work in silence. Normally I would have been completely aboard the train of conversation, but for right now I was avoiding it.

It didn’t last too long, after all, Levi had never been one to really hesitate.

  
“So brat…”

This really couldn't be good. Levi never initiated the conversation. It was always, ‘talk brat and if I’m interested, I’ll respond.” Which meant that whatever he was about to say next…

I braced myself.

“How long—”

“WAIT!”

He looked at me completely baffled.

“I’ll answer all of your questions if you promise to answer all of mine." 

“Who said I was going to ask a question?” 

“You said ‘how’ that’s pretty obvious.”

“Tch.” He scowled.

“C’mon, just agree it’s only fair. It's the Law of Equivalent Exchange here.” 

“Don’t say that.” 

I paused. That was rude.

“Why not…?”

He waved his hand dismissively. “It sounds nerdy and stupid.”

And ruder yet. This guy, I swear.

“Great. Now that I’m sufficiently wounded, feel free to ask your questions.”

And there it was again.

If I hadn’t spent time around Levi, I wouldn’t have ever noticed it, but there was definitely a bit of nervousness in his stance. Honestly, if I was mildly surprised by his stance, the question that he asked had me absolutely confounded.

“How long have you and Mikasa been together?”

Huh?

I wasn’t completely sure what he meant. Like how long have we known each other? Hmm, just how long had we been together?

“Well Mikasa and I have been together for a super long time.”

He kind of snorted, but nodded like this was an answer he expected.

I kept washing and he turned to put the dry dishes back in the cupboard. The silence was awkward. I definitely thought he was going to ask something more than, ‘How long have you and your sister been together?’ He must have found out from Isabel that Mikasa was adopted into my family.

I wondered if I had really answered his question; I was pretty vague, but it was the truth. I couldn't remember a time when Mikasa wasn’t by my side.

He started this topic so I just went with it.

“Armin too. I really love both of them. The three of us have always had each other. Ever since Armin started dating Erwin, things have changed a little bit because he doesn’t have the time to spend with us like he used to.”

I heard a strange sound behind me followed by a grunt.

Levi stood clutching a dish rather close to the ground.

“Did you just…?”

“Yes. I dropped it, but I caught it.”

“…..um okay…? Are you….okay?”

“I should be asking you that. Are you normal in any way?”

“What the hell kind of question is that?”

“Just how many people are you dating right now?!”

Okay. Officially confused. I’m dating people? Multiple…people? If I am, someone forgot to tell me.

“Umm…excuse me?”

“First, you say that you and Mikasa have been in a relationship for a long time, and then you tell me that you also have some weird love thing with Armin, who is now dating a very good friend of mine and _I swear to God_ if I find out that you’ve dragged Isabel into this shit too, I’m going to take this chef’s knife and—”

“Woah there Heichou! Can we just talk about this for a second? I do not think we are on the same page.”

 I frantically waved my arms in front of me to ward him off. I didn't know what he was planning to do with that chef’s knife, but I _definitely_ didn’t want to find out.

He spoke slowly.

“Are you or are you not dating Mikasa Ackerman?”

Am I dating….Mikasa?

Levi thought I was dating Mikasa?

When he asked if we were together…he meant… _together_ together!

... 

EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!

“I’m gonna hurl.” I clasped a hand over my mouth as an intense wave of nausea passed through me.“You _idiot_! You thought Mikasa and I were dating?!”

“Oi, watch it Brat!” He growled. “I asked if you were together and you not only said yes, but you said ‘for a super long time.’ How does that not translate to other people as _dating_?”

He called me a very long string of insults, but none of them really registered. I was too busy trying to wrap my head around how such a misunderstanding took place.

Sure, I think Mikasa is gorgeous, but this isn’t “[My Little Sister Can’t Be This Cute!](http://myanimelist.net/anime/8769/Ore_no_Imouto_ga_Konnani_Kawaii_Wake_ga_Nai)”

Or “[No Game No Life](http://myanimelist.net/anime/19815/No_Game_No_Life),” where you question the relationship between a brother and sister! Mikasa isn’t even my little sister! She’s older than me. (Well I guess if you’re into [KissxSis](http://myanimelist.net/anime/5042/Kiss_x_Sis), but that shit is…weird…I shudder just thinking about it. Isn't [The irregular at magic high](http://myanimelist.net/anime/20785/Mahouka_Koukou_no_Rettousei) like that too? EEeeeee. Gross!)

And I would never call her ‘cute’; she’d kick my ass.

There is no way in hell Mikasa and I would ever _ever_ _EVER_ be _dating each other_!

...Not to mention we’re both raging homosexuals…

“We don’t even act like we’re dating!”

“Oh yes you do! You fucking whisper to each other and cuddle while you’re on the couch and you two fucking live together!” 

“Wait, so Isabel told you that we were living together, but didn’t bother telling you what our relationship was?”

“That doesn’t fucking matter. You’re the one who started this whole problem, brat!”

“Hey, I’m not the one who went pairing me off  _with my sister_!”

He was about to angrily retort, but stopped and blinked at me.

“Your…sister…”

“Yes! Mikasa and I are _brother and sister._ You know _siblings!”_

“How the fuck are you two siblings?”

I sighed. “Mikasa kept her real last name when we adopted her into our family after her parents died. You, of all people, should understand our relationship. We’re just as much brother and sister as you, Isabel, and Farlan.”

“And what about that Armin kid?”

“He’s my best friend. He’s practically my brother.”

He continued to stare at me and mumbled something along the lines of ‘quite the diverse family.’

“So Heichou, anything else that I can clear up for you right here and now?”

“...Are you dating Isabel?”

“No.”

He seemed to visibly relax at that. We had both calmed down considerably now that we had all of our little misunderstandings out in the air and dealt with.

“Anything else?”

“Nope.”

“Wonderful.”

I put the last of the dishes on the drain board and grabbed a towel to dry my hands.

Levi was still putting away the dishes I had just washed so I propped myself up on one of the three stools tucked under the counter in the kitchen.

Levi glanced at me.

“Why are you still here?”

“Well you promised that you would answer my questions too, remember?”

“Tch. Fine brat. Fire away.”

I took a breath.

“Hi, I’m Eren Jaeger, I live with my older _sister_ Mikasa.”

I extended my hand towards him.

He raised his eyebrows and looked at it like it was a foreign object and he couldn’t understand for the life of him why I was pushing it towards him.

“How the fuck is that a question, brat?" 

I rolled my eyes.

“And you are?”

He sighed.

“C’mon Levi! Just go with it. I’m trying to avoid future misunderstandings here!”

“Oh? And how is you telling me this supposed to help?”

I let out an exasperated sigh.

“You’re killing me here, Heichou. I told you my full name and siblings. You do the same and we’ll just go back and forth.”

He groaned.

“I’ll consider it compensation for staring at my ass earlier,” I said pointedly.

He sighed. “Fine, brat. Whatever. But I’m not shaking your hand. No fucking way.”

I huffed and withdrew my hand. Oh well.

“Levi Ackerman. Isabel Magnolia and Farlan Church.”

Oh, so they do have different last names. I guess they really are similar to Mikasa and me. 

I was pretty curious as to how they all met each other. It was more complicated with three people. I could assume that Levi had taken them in based on what Isabel and already told me. It must be one hell of a story.

“I’m 21, and I’m a junior at the Sina institute of Art and Design." 

He stared at me like _we’re really doing this?_

I gave him a stern look and a nod.

“29. I work at Recon.”

“State your position.”

“What?”

“You have to say your job title since I said that I was a junior.”

I had my head rested on my arms. Levi was leaning over the opposite side of the counter. He threw me a scoff, but humored me.

“Tch. Art Director.”

Oh damn. That’s pretty high up for being 29. He was probably on the list with Erwin and Hanji Zoe.

Levi stood up abruptly and started walking towards the door. My head shot up and a sound of surprise escaped my lips.

“W-w-w—”

“If you wanna continue twenty questions, brat, you can follow me somewhere more comfortable than leaning against the fucking kitchen counter.”

Mikasa, Farlan, and Isabel had started up another movie. I recognized that it was one of Mikasa’s favorites—they probably let her pick. Mikasa was completely enamored by the characters on screen and didn’t so much as blink when Levi and I left the kitchen. I guess Farlan and Isabel were getting used to Levi and I disappearing because they didn’t notice either.

I followed Levi into the room with the piano in it. Fascinatingly, he sat down at one end of the couch and faced the opposite side. Inviting me to sit across from him.

Hey, sure! 

“Blood type O,” I said plopping down on the sofa and grabbing a pillow to hold in my lap.

“I’m A” he responded.

“Oooh, an introvert.”

He gave me his _you’re stupid_ look.

I was really getting well acquainted with that expression.

“You’re getting that from my _blood type_?”

God.

“My favorite color is a deep scarlet.”

He snickered. 

“What?” I asked defensively.

“Nothing,” he said smiling. “You have good taste, I was about to say wine red.”

I couldn’t help but smile too.

“Or blood red. I usually go with scarlet because if you tell people your favorite color is blood red, they give you a funny look and start thinking you’re some kind of serial killer.” I shrugged my shoulders and Levi chuckled.

“It is a nice color though.” 

I couldn’t believe that we actually agreed on something.

“What’s your major?”

“My what?”

“In school, idiot. What are you majoring in?”

“Oh um animation. 3D animation.”

He nodded. “So what do you wanna do when you graduate?”

I grinned.

“I’m gonna make the first gay Disney movie.”

(We really need one. Japan already has a bunch of shounen ai anime. Like [Love Stage](http://myanimelist.net/anime/21105/Love_Stage!!) and [Sekaiichi Hatsukoi](http://myanimelist.net/anime/9926/Sekaiichi_Hatsukoi). Not to mention all those OVA's.)[  
](http://myanimelist.net/anime/10161/No.6)

Levi laughed. Like actually laughed: hunched forward and everything. It made me grin even more. Even when he stopped laughing, he stayed smiling with his arm propped against the back of the couch, and leaning into his hand.

We talked like that for what must have been over an hour. I had gradually slumped further and further into the couch and eventually, I found my eyes drooping a little.

I felt Levi give me a light kick.

“Don’t fall asleep, brat. I’m not hauling your ass to your car so your sister can drive you home.”

I groaned and curled further into the couch, trapping the leg that Levi had just kicked me with.

Once I start entering the world of sleep it’s very difficult to drag me out.

“Oi, get off me.”

“Shhhh. I’m not sleeping. I’m just resting.”

He struggled to free himself by using his other leg. He eventually just left both his legs next to me in order to avoid kicking me in the face, which he had come close to doing a few times while trying to get free.

“You’re such a little shit,” was the last thing I heard before falling asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ore no Imouto ga Konnani Kawaii Wake ga Nai (My little sister can't be this cute!)  
> No Game No Life  
> KissxSis  
> The irregular at Magic High  
> Love Stage  
> Sekaiichi Hatsukoi
> 
> And surprise! I added French crap! Because I can. I figured it would be more convenient to just add the translations right there instead of having anyone who doesn't know bad words in french be forced to scroll down to the bottom. I really like the small banter in french between Isabel and Levi. I too enjoy insulting my siblings in french.  
> 


	11. One Hell of a Fanboy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I'm Simply One Hell of a Butler." -Black Butler
> 
> Everyone gets together to celebrate Thanksgiving at Levi's house. While waiting for the food to cook Isabel and Eren demonstrate their skills at Taboo. And maybe there's some Levi-Eren action in there too! ↁ‿ↁ *wink

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Taboo: Taboo is a word, guessing, and party game. The objective of the game is for a player to have their partner(s) guess the word on the player's card without using the word itself or five additional words listed on the card.
> 
> I absolutely love Taboo, it's so much fun to play with friends and/or family. The only problem is its gotta be the loudest game i've ever been a part of. Within five minutes we're all screaming and swearing and yelling random shit. Its a blast.
> 
> The Ereri ship is sailing and I hope you enjoy!
> 
> FYI (v)=video  
> AND OMG THANK YOU FOR ALL THE KUDOS! AND COMMENTS! (They make me so happy!!! Hell YOU GUYS make me so happy!)

**Levi POV**

“You Fucker.”

I didn’t even knock on her door before going in. Sure enough, there Hanji sat completely relaxed behind her desk like she had been expecting me to come barging in all morning.

“Why hello, Levi dear. How are you on this very fine day?” Hanji said. Chipper as usual.

I placed both my hands on her desk and sneered. “Siblings? _Really?!”_

“Oh! Very good Levi!” She broke into a large grin. Tapping her chin she said, “I think that comes to,” she counted on her fingers. “Three days and approximately 11 hours. Definitely longer than necessary, yet still _very_ impressive.”

“Mais putain, tu me fais chier! Tu as le cervau d’un sandwhich au merde, j’espère que tu meurs dans un trou, pouffiasse.”

[What the fuck, you piss me off! You have the brain of a shit sandwich! I hope you die in a hole, bitch.]

Hanji sat there politely staring at me as I spat at her in French. I was so fucking pissed, I didn’t even register half the shit I was saying. I wanted her to know _exactly_ what I thought and she’d damn well know it right now.

I paused for breath.

“I’ve always thought French was a beautiful language. You sound pretty sexy when you speak, I do so wish I knew what you were saying.” She batted her eyes and continued to smile sweetly.

“That’s fucking bullshit. I know you worked at the Paris branch for a year,” I growled, throwing myself into the chair that was across from her. I pulled it closer so I could keep my elbows on her desk and glare at her.

She chuckled. “I wonder how it is that you do your research so well in certain areas, but not in others?”

My retort died in my mouth. The anger surged up again.

“You…Merde! You played me! You made me think that they were dating so I wouldn’t go digging through Mikasa’s file to see if she had a brother. If I even suspected that she and Eren were family I could have just done a background check!”

She sat up straighter. “You give me too much credit. Most of that you did _all_ on your own, honey.”

I was too busy glaring at her to respond again.

“You knew this entire fucking time.” How had I not realized she was lying to me? Usually I could read Hanji like an open book.

“Actually, I was completely telling the truth. I figured out long ago that lying to you doesn’t work.”

I crossed my arms waiting for her to continue.

“I just made sure that I didn’t know all the information until after I left your office.” She shrugged. “I suspected that they were siblings based on the way that Mikasa talked about him right from the start. I only confirmed it after I let you know that she was living with Eren.”

I sighed. “Sac de merde, je te touerais.”

[Sack of shit, I’m gonna kill you.]

“No, you’re not. You love me.”

“Oh? And how do you figure that?” I cast her a lazy glance.

“Because I bet you got a lot of one-on-one time with Eren.” She wiggled her eyebrows. “And I’d say you definitely learned more about him than just his family.”

I huffed.

“HAHA!” She roared in triumph. “So? What’s his type? Does he like you? You like him right? Are you guys officially dating yet?”

“Will you get your fucking head out of your ass! Who the hell said anything about us hooking up? I don’t give a shit what his type is either.”

Her eyebrows rose.

“You’re not denying that you like him.”

Fuck you Hanji. Fuck you.

“I don’t like him.”

She chuckled mischievously.

“Levi. You’ve been a complete mess ever since you started thinking about Eren with Miksa. Then when you find out that they’re only siblings, you’re incredibly relieved to the point of barging into my office and yelling at me for not telling you sooner.”

I scowled and said the first thing that came to mind. “I told you it’s because—”

“If you try to give me that ‘Mikasa seems like a nice girl’ shit I’m going to spank you. We both know that’s complete bull.”

I frowned and stared off in silence.

“I haven’t seen the kid so I don’t exactly know what he looks like. Tell me,” she leaned in closer, “is he your type?”

“I don’t want to have this conversation with you.”

“Oh c’mon, Levi, you have to have this conversation with _someone_.”

“No. No I don’t.”

It was her turn to huff, “Levi I hate to break to you, but what I’m trying so desperately to make you realize is that we’ve been having ‘this conversation’ all along anyway.” She gave me a pointed look. “Right from the very beginning Eren Jaeger was special and you know it. The number of people who have spilled shit on you can’t be counted on my fingers alone. I myself have been present on more than one occasion where a terrified frazzled intern has accidently dropped your coffee into your lap. And we all know the pants that you wear to work are way more expensive than the ones you wear on your days off. Even if they aren’t your _favorite_ pair of pants.” She paused and waited for affirmation.

When I failed to give her any she leaned back in her chair seemingly losing all of her earlier pep.

“Levi,” She sighed tiredly, “Babe, you need to get ahold of yourself.”

“Hanji, I don’t even know if he’s gay.”

She leaned over her desk and flicked my forehead. “Wasn’t he totally checking you out the first time he went to your house?”

That felt like such a long time ago.

“He’s gay.” She said with a firm nod.

My head hurt. I didn’t want to think about all of this shit.

Was Eren Jaeger special? _Is_ Eren Jaeger special?

Sure, I found the brat easy to talk to—which doesn’t happen very often. But I talk to Hanji and I talk to Erwin. And I will admit that he certainly does have a nice ass…

And something about the way he cooks is out of this world.

Not only the food itself, but also the way that his eyes light up when he’s doing something he obviously loves. And then he becomes so excited he just starts talking about whatever the fuck just pops in his head.

And I just go with it. Before I know it, I’m having a full-on conversation with him.

The worst part is when I realize that I’m enjoying his company.

Or when Isabel prances into my room and announces that Eren’s coming over and my pulse speeds up.

Ugh! Fuck!

Hanji was still staring at me. “So. Which side won the battle? Or is it still raging on?”

I growled at her.

“It’s still going on.” I mumbled after a minute.

“Well let me know when you finally surrender to your feelings.”

_______________

**Eren POV**

“Happy Thanksgiving!” Isabel yelled throwing her arms around me, successfully pushing all of the air out of my lungs.

The chance to breathe only returned when Isabel let go to give Mikasa a hug. Mikasa, of course, didn’t look phased from the bear hug at all.

“Damn, Izzy it smells fucking fantastic!” The entire house was filled with delicious aromas. Walking into the kitchen I saw various dishes already littering the counter top.

There was also a man sitting at the counter drinking beer that I didn’t recognize.

“Eren, Mikasa, this is Mr. Moblit Berner. He and his wife are friends of the family and they’ll be joining us for dinner.”

Mikasa and I both shook his hand and said some pleasantries.

All the food smelled great but as I glanced around something seemed missing.

“Guys…Where’s the turkey?”

Farlan laughed and Levi waved his hand dismissively.

“Eren,” Isabel started with a sigh, slinging her arms around my shoulder, “We’re French! If we celebrate Thanksgiving, we’re doing it our way!”

“And what’s your way?” I asked eyeing the food on the counter. It didn’t all _look_ like French food. So…

Before she could respond another figure entered the room.

“EREN!!!” Was the only warning I got before I was attacked [Elizabeth Midford](https://38.media.tumblr.com/1d49a6d620cf9fe6252ac71aaa5fb19e/tumblr_nm3anxft6s1sji7w0o1_500.gif) style. ([x](http://myanimelist.net/anime/4898/Kuroshitsuji))

“Oh my God you’re so cute! I could just eat you up! I can’t _believe_ that Mikasa _AND_ Levi have been hiding you from me!!!”

The world swirled around me and then I felt strong arms pull me away from the force I could only describe as a hurricane.

“You’re not allowed to kill him, shithead.”  A voice said near my ear.

“What’s that Levi? You want him?”

I finally got a good look at my attacker. She was tall with brown hair pulled back into a ponytail. She had stylish brown glasses that matched with the jumpsuit she was wearing. Long earrings jingled every time she moved her head. Which was a lot.

“Shitty four-eyes. Kill him and I don’t have anyone to make me Bœuf Bourguignon!”

Levi released me and pushed me behind his back so that the woman couldn’t grab me again.

Did Levi just complement me?

Eh close enough.

“Pfff, oh yeah, I bet you want him for _making_ lots of _other_ things too!” She snickered.

…Huh?

Levi and the woman bickered back and forth until the woman noticed Mikasa and pounced on her too.

“Oh Mikasa, it’s so good to see you! I swear I leave the kitchen for _five_ minutes to go to the bathroom and all of these _Wonderful_ people come!”

Levi scoffed, “Maybe you should leave more often.”

The woman let go of Mikasa and dramatically put the back of her hand to her forehead.

“So mean to me!” She sobbed. Levi rolled his eyes in response and crossed his arms leaning onto the island counter. Today he was wearing a plain black V-neck with blue jeans. He was also barefoot as usual.

“Ummm…,” was the only thing I could manage to get out.

Levi sighed. “Eren, this nutcase is Hanji. We’ve been…” He coughed. “ _Friends_ for four years.” He sighed again. “Lord Jesus knows why.”

“That’s right!” She yelled excitedly before suddenly stopping. “Wait…Levi… _Six_ years! We’ve been friends for _Six_ years!”

“Four.” He repeated with a shrug of his shoulders.

“B-but Levi. Levi? Leeevvviiiiiiii???!!!!!”

“Oi shut the fuck up, you’re so loud!”

“We met at the magazine’s Christmas party six years ago. It was friendship at first sight.” She let out a dreamy sigh and clasped her hands together, batting her eyes. “Just think, it’s almost our friendship anniversary!”

Levi was staring at her with a rather appalled expression. “Hanji. No.”

“But you’re discounting _two full years_ of friendship between us!!!” She had latched onto his arm by this point.

  
“You stalking me for two years doesn’t count as us being friends.” He forcefully detached himself from the raving woman's grip.

“I can’t believe it! When Erwin introduced you to Armin he said six years and you didn’t correct him!”

“That’s because I _have_ been friends with Erwin for six years.”

“WOW. I can’t believe you still like that bastard better! He didn’t even bother coming to Thanksgiving! Where is he anyway? He never said why he wasn’t coming!”

“Actually. I can answer that one.” I called. “He brought Armin to meet his family.”

The woman, Hanji, staggered backwards clutching her heart. “I’m going to go drown my sorrows in delicious food. At least you still love me, Moblit!”

Moblit laughed as Hanji made to grab whatever she could from the counter.

“Oi! Touch any of that food before dinner time and I’ll put shit in your dessert.”

“But Levi! You can’t seriously ask me not to touch any of this for the next _three hours_!!!!”

Levi kept smacking her hand away from anything she tried to touch and eventually dragged her out of the kitchen.

He came back alone and sighed. “Isabel, go keep that obnoxious woman company.”

Isabel happily skipped off toward the living room, with Mikasa in tow. Moblit followed them too with a new bottle of beer in hand. They were definitely well aware that Levi had a tendency to get irked at the idea of a crowded kitchen.

“So Eren, what’s in here?” He was pulling open the plastic bag Mikasa had set on the counter. He pulled out the box inside. “And what bakery is this from? The box doesn’t have a label…”

I leaned on the counter. “Actually that’s not from a bakery. Mikasa and I made that ourselves. It’s dessert.”

Farlan started visibly salivating. “We have to hide this. We can’t let this gem be in any kind of danger. If Hanji or Isabel hear about this, it’ll be like a lamb to the slaughter.”

He was turning around in circles trying to figure out what to do with the cake.

“Well a normal human would put this in the fridge.” Levi remarked, plucking the cake from Farlan’s hands and doing just that.

I smiled at Farlan, who was sputtering, “it might not have needed to be refrigerated you know.”

“So, what is it brat?” Levi’s eyes met mine and I smiled. Oh have I been waiting for this moment!

“Schwarzwälder Kirschtorte.”

He gaped at me. Yeah, there you go bastard. Making fun of my French! Let’s see how well you pronounce _that_!!! See how well you do when I bust out German! I only lasted a few more seconds of looking at his face before I burst out laughing.

The dumbfounded look didn’t even fade. Both he and Farlan had their mouths ajar with wide eyes. Oh it was wonderful. Better than I imagined.

“Quick Eren! Say something else!”

I raised my eyebrows. “Something else what? Another dessert name?”

“Anything!” Farlan said flailing is arms. “Just something else in German!” He was practically on top of the island counter staring at me, waiting for my next words. I glanced over at Levi and he nodded. I guess he wanted to hear it to. Okay.

“Ich hoffe, dass Sie den Nachtisch genießen. Es ist einer meiner Lieblinge.”

“Dude, that is so cool! What did you say?”

“I said ‘I hope you enjoy the dessert. It is one of my favorites.’”

“Daaamn,” He whistled.

I glanced over at Levi. I only got a glimpse of his face before it went back to his normal, neutral expression, but I could’ve sworn he was mildly impressed.

“So Eren, say the name of the dessert one more time. I’m gonna try my best!”

I laughed and waved Farlan off. “I was trolling you. It has an English name too. I think you’ll recognize it. It’s Black Forest cake.” I laughed. “It is homemade though. From a recipe my mom used to make.”

Farlan laughed too. “Wow Eren you really had me there for a minute.”

Levi just rolled his eyes at me.

“So.” I clapped my hands together. “If this is some hybrid Thanksgiving, what should I make?”

“Well, you can make whatever you want. We already pretty much have the main dish down, but I think we could do with some more sides. Honestly, if you could bust out some of your own ethnic food that would be super cool.”

Ok. I could do that. Some Lamb Köfte would probably be well recieved.

The last of the food was almost ready. Farlan still had one thing left in the oven cooking.

I walked into the family room to see what the other four were doing.

There was a huge pile of board games next to the table and Hanji, Isabel, and Mikasa sat huddled around the table in front of the couch. Moblit sat on the opposite couch watching.

“Eren! Come help us! MIkasa keeps winning at _everything_.” Isabel cried.

Typical Mikasa. Of course she was winning. The only person who ever beat her in a game to date was Armin. Because _no one_ beats Armin. Not even the amazing Mika.

“Ugh! I give up let’s play something else! You obviously won again Mikasa.” Hanji nodded her head in agreement and reached down to see what other games they had.

Suddenly my brain made a connection that it should have made hours ago. This woman was Hanji. She was also friends with Levi and she knew Mikasa…HOLY FUCK! THIS IS _THE_ HANJI ZOE?!

I didn’t know whether I should be worried or amazed. This woman’s insane! But she also seemed very intelligent. All the words that Mikasa had used to describe the woman all seemed like a vast understatement to the real thing.

“Hey! We can play Taboo! Eren and I will be a team and you two can pair up.” Isabel said excitedly.

I sat down across from her. Hanji pulled out the small hourglass and gave each of us a huge stack of cards.

“We’ll use the blue section first. Who wants to start?”

“Eren can.” Mikasa said with a smile.

“Bring it, Mika. This is the one game that Isabel and I are totally ready for!”

Hanji held up the glass, “and GO!”

I started rambling off as quickly as I could.

First Word: _Leak_

“[Fruits Basket](http://myanimelist.net/anime/120/Fruits_Basket)! [Kyo](http://orig12.deviantart.net/1a1b/f/2012/096/2/2/cooking_leek_soup_by_ceciliabeth-d4v6dvj.jpg) hates these!”

“Leeks!”

It doesn’t matter how it’s spelled. She just has to say the word.

Next word: _Dragon_

“It’s over 9,000!”

“Dragon Ball”

“Naruto! Leaf—”

“Village!”

“Uhhh Fairy Tail! [Zarconis](http://vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/fairytail/images/0/06/Dragon_Zirconis.png/revision/latest?cb=20140726024718) the mmm Dragon!”

“Jade!”

"Markarov is the Guild's—"

"Leader! No, Master!" 

“Clannad! The Drama—”

“Club!”

“The Nine tailed—”

“Fox!”

I was throwing cards left and right. Trying to go as fast as I could. If I couldn’t think of something quick I just skipped the card and moved on. But I knew that as long as I could think of something anime-related, Isabel would get it. Not to mention that I didn’t even have to worry about the Taboo-ed words if I was yelling about anime.

“May all your blank burn!”([x](http://myanimelist.net/anime/431/Howl_no_Ugoku_Shiro))

“Bacon!”

“[Blank Art Online](http://myanimelist.net/anime/11757/Sword_Art_Online).”

“Sword!”

“[Great blank Onizuka](http://myanimelist.net/anime/245/Great_Teacher_Onizuka)”

“Teacher!”

“[High School DXD](http://myanimelist.net/anime/11617/High_School_DxD)! [Issei Hyodo](http://img1.ak.crunchyroll.com/i/spire1/0a92692886155fdccf22820a598e08371362915619_full.jpg) just wants his own—”

“HAREM!”

“Soul Eater! MAAAAAAKKKKAAAAAAA—”

“[CHOP](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TuNQX_RYLrs)!”

“Blank Geass!”

“Code!”

“Black mmmm Shooter!”

“[Black Rock Shooter](http://myanimelist.net/anime/7059/Black%E2%98%85Rock_Shooter_\(OVA\))!”

“mmmm Beats!”

“Angel Beats”

“[Elfen Lied](http://myanimelist.net/anime/226/Elfen_Lied)! [Lucy](http://images5.fanpop.com/image/photos/27600000/Lucy-elfen-lied-27623709-440-332.png) has two of these on her head!”

“Horns!”

“Taiga’s spirit animal”

“Tiger!”

“See you space—”

“[Cowboy](http://myanimelist.net/anime/1/Cowboy_Bebop)!”

“Did you know Shinigami love—”

“Apples!”

“The blank of Haruhi Suzumiya!”([x](http://myanimelist.net/anime/849/Suzumiya_Haruhi_no_Yuuutsu))

“Melan—”

“The other one!”

“Oh umm Disappearance!”

“YES!” next card quick!

I imitated the voice. “Hey mister, I am mad scientist. Its so COOOOL! ...sonofabitch.”([v](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Bf0aYBk0OQ))

She started laughing hysterically. She was barely able to say “Stein’s Gate.” And get the card.

“Deadman—”([x](http://myanimelist.net/anime/6880/Deadman_Wonderland))

“Wonderland!”

We went on and on just like that until time ran out. When Hanji called time we were both out of breath.

“That was insane.” It was Mikasa. She looked at Hanji. “We really have our work cut out for us.”

Hanji nodded in agreement.

We kept playing, but Isabel and I were unstoppable. If there was a card we couldn’t link to anime we would just skip it, but we were completely in sync.

“Oi. What’s with all the screaming? I’m surprised the neighbors haven’t started banging down the fucking door to complain yet.”

Levi came and sat down on the floor next to me.

“Isabel and Eren are kicking our butts, it’s totally unfair. We have to switch up the pairings. You wanna play Levi?”

“Not especially.” He said.

“Well hate to be a party pooper, but I’ve got to go to the bathroom and I think I’m gonna sit this round out.” Mikasa said standing up.

“Awwww.” Hanji whined. “Well fine. Levi you have to play now! And Isabel and Eren can’t be partners so we’ll have Levi and Eren partner up and me and Isabel. That should be fair right?”

Everyone nodded.

We let Isabel and Hanji start. They got through a decent number of cards before they both collapsed on the ground laughing. Something about ‘Underwear’ but I wasn’t sure. Levi was staring at them with an amused expression. They stayed out of commission until time ran out. Every time Hanji had reached to pull another card she would burst out into a new fit of giggles and Isabel would start up again too. Hanji had a rather contagious laugh and before I knew it I was laughing as well. It was ridiculous.

“Okay, your turn.” Hanji said still gasping for breath. Mikasa settled on the couch next to Moblit and got comfortable to watch.

“And GO!”

I started pulling cards and Levi answered. He caught on quickly to the hints I was giving, but it was definitely a lot harder than it was with Isabel because I had to carefully think of clues to give him without saying the 5 taboo ones.

And then we got some lucky cards.

“Moonlight Sonata by”

“Beethoven.”

“Dyson sells”

“Vacuum-cleaners.”

Isabel had told me about that one. Apparently she had used it to bribe him for something. She wouldn’t tell me what she bribed him for, but she complained about how he had done it and now she had to dish out a lot of money for his Christmas present.

“Um. My favorite color.”

“Scarlet.”

“You suffer from this at night.”

“Insomnia.”

Suddenly the conversation we had the last time I was here was coming in handy. We had talked about a lot of different things. I had been surprised when he actually told me about his insomniac tendencies. I don’t even remember how it came up.

“My favorite chocolate thingy.” I couldn’t say bar and I didn’t know if he would get it.

“Milky Way.”

I had to concentrate my gaze on the cards I was flipping over. I knew that if I looked at him I would get distracted. I had been really happy when he had proven that he remembered my favorite color and my favorite chocolate bar.

_Black_

“You like drinking this.”

“Black tea.”

A few more random cards and then, “ _Your_ favorite candy thingy.”

“Snickers.”

_Piano Player_

“Umm… _You_ are this because you blank this specific instrument.”

“Piano…and Play?”

I nodded excitedly. “So you are a piano play…”

“Piano Player.”

“YES!”

Next card.

“You like Classical and Alternative, but you also like…”

“Jazz.”

“I spilled mocha on you at a…”

I heard him snicker. “Café”

“What you call me.”

“Brat.”

“No. The other one. Whenever I mention anime.”

“Loser.”

“Yeah. That one. Ok. Uhhh Beef Burgundy is a French…”

“Dish.”

“The people at the magazine would probably call you this.”

“Rude?”

“Uhhh no. It has to do with your umm ethic.”

“Work ethic…like workaholic?”

“Yeah!”

I flipped over the next card. And Jesus I should have skipped it right away. But it seemed harmless and simple enough.

Kiss. You can’t say: Lip, Lock, Smooch, Suck, or Face.

“The thing you do with the person you love.”

“The _thing?_ ”

“Yeah.”

“Sex?”

Everyone around us burst into a fit of laughter.

“No you idiot. Not sex! Well I mean… yeah...but…No!”

“Well you said the _thing_ you _do_ with someone you _love_!”

“The thing _before_ sex! With your mouth!”

Oh God.

I didn’t even realize what I was saying until it was too late. If everyone was laughing before they were positively _roaring_ now.

“So blow job.”

“No! Goddammit!”

I could feel my face starting to heat up.

“Before sex! Before blow job!!!”

Isabel was rolling around on the floor clutching her sides. And Mikasa had her a hand over her mouth as her entire body shook. Hanji was banging her fist on the table with her head next to it.

“Sooooo not sex and not blow job.” He was smiling and I could tell at this point he was playing with me. “Is it fingering? Grinding? Fondling?”

“I said you use your mouth dumbass! And it’s not licking!”

“Oh damn, I was gonna say that next... You sure it’s not rimming?”

“Get your head out of the gutter and think innocent here! Innocent! Pure! Like ‘True love’s first—’” I was waving my hands around wildly trying to get my point across.

“Oh. Kiss. Why didn’t you reference that sooner Eren?” His voice was all sweetness.

Time had been up for a while, but no one had enough breath to call it.

“Ugh! You are the dirtiest old man I have ever met!”

He was smiling rather broadly. Teeth and everything.

It was beautiful.

I suddenly forgot my own embarrassment long enough to be happy that he seemed to be happy. Even if he was vastly enjoying himself at my expense, it was nice to see him smile like that.

Everyone around us was still cackling.

Hanji was gasping for breath and trying to wheeze out “You forgot tonguing and nipple sucking!”

“Ew, Hanji! That’s gross!” Mikasa yelled.

Isabel was still buried facedown on the floor sobbing.

“Hey guys, dinner is ready—What the fuck happened here?”

“Oh Farlan, baby, you missed it.” Hanji waved.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anime:
> 
> Black Butler  
> Fruits Basket  
> Dragon Ball Z  
> Naruto  
> Fairy Tail  
> Clannad  
> Howl's Moving Castle  
> Sword Art Online  
> Great Teacher Onizuka  
> High School DXD  
> Soul Eater  
> Code Geass  
> Black Rock Shooter  
> Angel Beats  
> Elfen Lied  
> Toradora  
> Cowboy Bebop  
> Death Note  
> The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya/The Disappearance of Haruhi Suzumiya  
> Stein's Gate  
> Deadman Wonderland
> 
> Hohohoho look at how many there are! Damn. Only the ones that haven't been linked to myanimelist.net before are linked. Which is why not all of them had a thingy if you were wondering...


	12. If You Don't Fight, You Can't Win

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "If you don't fight, you can't win!" -Attack on Titan
> 
> Eren and Mikasa go to Levi's to help set up the Christmas tree and decorate. Armin and Erwin are also there. Armin takes the opportunity to ask Eren about his feelings toward Levi and allows Eren some time to get all of his feelings off his chest and get some advice for his concerns.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hola!
> 
> So this is the longest chapter i've written. It's huge. You can actually thank Editor-chan for that because she refused to edit my chapter until I wrote more, which ended up turning into me writing double the length of a normal chapter. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ happens. I hope you enjoy it.
> 
> Once again thank you for all of your comments and kudos! They make me so incredibly happy!

“C’mon Izzy, just accept it! It’s a fucked-up Christmas ornament. It’s special.”

  
She launched at me, trying to grab the red, egg shaped ornament out of my hands.

“Ooh ooh, I got it!” I shouted, dodging her and jumping onto a chair so that my arms were out of reach.

I extended my arms in front of me with the ornament cupped in my palms, “All children hold an egg in their heart.”([x](http://myanimelist.net/anime/2923/Shugo_Chara!))

“You fucker! Stop making fun of me!”

“Isabel, catch!” I heard the voice directly behind me, but had no time to react before strong arms shoved me from behind.

“Wai—No Farlan!!!” I catapulted off the chair.

The egg ornament was a projectile flying through the air and I barreled toward Isabel, incredibly unsteady on my feet. She had two options: catch me or catch the ornament.

She caught the ornament.

Thanks, Izzy. So glad we’re friends.

I was still sprawled out on the floor, face down, when Armin walked in.

“Looking good, Eren.”

My head immediately perked up at the sound of my best friend’s voice. However, at the sight of the smirk on his face, I planted my face back into the floor.

“Why are you so meeaaaannnn?” I moaned, voice muffled.

“Hello again, Eren.”

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

I shot up and rolled over, crossing my legs in front of me so I was in a nice neat pile on the floor instead of spread eagle. Given, I was still on the floor, but I think my body decided that me sitting on my ass was better than me sitting on my face.

“Nice to see you again too, Erwin,” I said with a large smile as I scratched the back of my head, trying to play off the way my hand had instinctively shot forward to shake his. It took a lot of effort to say ‘Erwin’ and not ‘sir,’ so while my brain was distracted my hand had come up all on its own. Damn thing.

“I’m definitely quite pleased at the ironic turn of events. You and Levi are on good terms now, which is great.”

Well I guess we were on good times. We got along surprisingly well… I mean it wasn’t like he didn’t still call me ‘brat’ or ‘loser,’ and he was still kind of an asshole too…but I really liked the rare occasions when he smiled.

I internally punched myself in the face. ‘ _I really like when he smiles’. Really Eren? Did you really just think that?_

God! My life isn’t a Shoujo! This isn’t [Kamisama Hajimemashita](http://myanimelist.net/anime/14713/Kamisama_Hajimemashita); ‘ _Oh Tomoe’s an asshole, but I like when he smiles!’_

But I really do enjoy when he remembers the things that I like. And when he compliments the way that I cook or when he talks to me and tells me about his problems. It makes me really happy.

“See what you did; now he’s just sitting there, dumbfounded, thinking about Levi.” Armin threw at Erwin.

Erwin laughed and my face did a replacement jutsu with a tomato.

“Armin!”

He shrugged. Then added, “You, me, later. We’re gonna have a talk.”

At that, he returned to digging through the boxes that were next to the tree, pulling out misshapen ornaments and weird sock puppets.

“I swear, if you make fun of anything in there like Eren did, I will end you,” Isabel muttered. She was on her tiptoes attaching the egg to the tree.

“Well I’m not that sorry anymore, considering that you and Farlan tried to kill me.”

“Did not. You were fine,” Farlan protested, plopping down on the couch.

“No Farlan, you’re lucky I caught the ornament! What would you have done if it went flying in the other direction?! It would be on the floor in a million pieces right now!”

“But it didn’t,” Farlan said with a wide smile as Isabel huffed.

“Alright, I think we got almost everything,” Mikasa said, making her grand entrance. She was carrying five boxes that were stacked well over her head and I marveled at her ability to even walk. I jumped up and helped her set them down—we had moved the table off to the side so that we had more room to put the boxes on the floor. Thank Buddha that the tree was already in place when we got here. The thing was fucking huge and I’m glad I wasn’t the one who had to get it set up; we were just part of the decorating squad here.

Levi came in behind Mikasa with an equally large load.

“Wait, so ummm, is _all_ of this going on the tree?” I asked as Levi knelt down and started opening up boxes to reveal tinsel, lights, and more ornaments that boasted a variety of odd shapes and colors.

“We’re putting the fucking tinsel on first,” Levi growled.

~

We were all giddy.

Well, everyone with the exception of Levi. Because Levi being giddy…would be…uhhhhh… _weird._

Armin had lights wrapped around his head and a necklace of tinsel.

“No Eren, you can’t put that there, it looks weird!” Farlan yelled.

“Fuck you, I’m an expert!”

“But you can’t put a baby Jesus ornament next to a Santa Claus one! That’s just wrong!” Armin agreed.

“Screw you guys! I have artistic license and this spot on the tree looks bald so I’m trying to add crap!”

“Eren, it’s like giving a [Christmas cake](http://ic.pics.livejournal.com/kurenaitsubasa/37241182/2209/2209_original.png) [to a demon](http://41.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lqbkwpIxT91qi2pyho2_500.jpg),” Isabel said laughing.

“That’s only going to encourage me,” I replied with a smirk.

“I don’t get it.”

“Of course you don’t get it, Farlan,” Mikasa said from somewhere on the other side of the tree.

Farlan moved to help Levi put up an ornament towards the top of the tree. Levi shot him a glare and put the ball lower. Isabel collapsed in a fit of giggles, “H-he tried to, but it was t-too high!” Her words were almost indistinguishable from her laughter.

“You’re one to talk. You’re fucking shorter than I am!”

But nothing he said could make her stop.

“It’s okay Levi, I can handle the things that need to go at the top.”

“Shut the fuck up, Eyebrows.” Levi grouched.

“Leeevvviii, don’t be grumpy!” I whined.

He stared at me horrified. “Holy fuck, _never_ do that again. You sounded like fucking Hanji.”

“Well she couldn’t make it, so someone has to bug the shit out of you.” He rolled his eyes and hit me in the face with a pillow.

Honestly, I had never set up a tree this big. Usually Mikasa and I had a small tree and some lights, but nothing too eccentric.

And this was really fun. Someone had plugged in their iPod to the stereo and pulled up Pandora so random Christmas songs were blaring out while we sang along. Luckily Pandora has this magical thing called a skip button.

Even Levi didn’t complain about it. Because unlike the radio, we weren’t listening to the same damn songs over and _over again!_

“Hey Mikasa now that the tree is set up we should probably go get the presents.” She nodded and we both moved to get our gifts out of the car.

“Wait what?”

We stopped in our tracks at the sound of Isabel’s confused voice.

“Well since we came over today we brought our Christmas presents for you, Farlan, and Levi with us. We’ll just leave them under the tree.”

“Does this mean you’re not coming back for Christmas?!”

Now I was confused.

“Well, I didn’t even realize we were invited…we’ve intruded on you guys a lot already as it is.”

Before I knew it she was standing directly in front of me and my arm was a huge mass of pain.

“Ow! What was that for?”

“You idiot! The whole point of Christmas was spending it with family and friends!”

“That sounds an awful lot like Thanksgiving.”

She punched me again.

“Exactly! And we invited you to spend Thanksgiving with us, so why wouldn’t we want you here for Christmas?! Shithead!!!”

I looked at MIkasa. She had a hand over her mouth meaning that she was laughing right now. Apparently me getting punched by Isabel was highly amusing.

“I guess we’re coming back on Christmas Mika.”

“Yeah.” She was still grinning. “Well I guess we can still leave the presents under the tree anyway since we brought them.”

“Good. I'm glad that's all cleared up.” Isabel said in a stern voice. She turned on her feet and marched to the kitchen.

She didn't come back until after Mikasa and I finished putting all the gifts under the tree. She was carrying a tray full of hot cocoa that she had made for everyone.

“FUCK NO!” Levi fumed. “You savages want hot chocolate, you drink it in the damn kitchen!”

There was a chorus of grumbling as everyone began migrating. More than one person had glitter stuck in their hair... I don’t even know how the fuck that happened.

I didn’t really feel like having hot cocoa at the moment, and with everyone running off to the kitchen I figured I should just wait out the crowd. However, when I turned back to go crash on the couch a certain blonde kid was waiting for me with a grin on his face.

“So…Levi huh?” He was still smirking and I quickly jumped on top of him and covered his mouth before he could say anything else. I glanced around us looking around for the chibi Satan. Nowhere in sight. Good. With any luck he’d be in the kitchen.

“Shhhhhh! What would you have done if he’d heard you?!”

“I don’t know Eren, what would _you_ have done?”

“N-Nothing, shithead.”

The Christmas tree rustled a little and I shot up like a rocket, doing a full 360 around the damn thing to make sure no one was hiding there.

“Uhhh! I can’t take the stress. C’mon.” I pulled his arm and dragged him into the back room I had become all too familiar with. Locking the door, I sat down on the floor by the sewing machine.

Armin sat across from me and leaned back against the wall.

“Hi Eren, how’s life?”

I sighed. “Life is good. Life is…nice. How was Erwin’s family?”

Armin got a little blushy. “Well, they were really sweet. I mean Erwin is really successful, and I thought it would be awkward, but they welcomed me with open arms. I guess it’s easier when you already know your son is gay.”

I laughed, “Well yeah.”

Armin’s first experience meeting his boyfriend’s family hadn’t gone so well.

Apparently the shithead never bothered to tell Armin that he didn’t tell his parents he was gay before bringing him over. So Armin was under the impression that they already knew…and it was awkward for everyone.

“I was kind of nervous when Levi introduced me to Hanji. I didn’t even realize she was Hanji freaking Zoe until after. She attacked me and Levi just introduced her as one of his friends.”

I colored again at the thought of how he’d pulled me away from Hanji and stood in between us so that she couldn’t get to me.

“Eren, you’re doing it again.”

“Doing what?!”

“Staring off into space, smiling, and slightly blushing while thinking about Levi.”

“Who said anything about me thinking about Levi?” I retorted defensively.

“Well, for one,” Armin held up a finger, “your face right now. And two, are you kidding me? Of course you’re thinking about Levi. I caught you staring at him at least three times while we were putting up ornaments, not to mention the two times you stared at his ass when he reached up.”

“Armin!” I whined covering my face with my hands. “That obvious?”

“Eren, your staring was borderline [Hisoka](https://tsukiyonohikari.files.wordpress.com/2014/03/a000_010.png) eye-fucking.”

I groaned. I couldn’t believe I had been so conspicuous. “It’s not like I was staring at him on purpose! It just kind of happened! Well, the ass ones were kind of on purpose…It’s not fair Armin! He has a really nice ass! And well…body in general…and he…ugh, I don’t even know.”

“And I’m here to help you find out.”

“That sounded really cheesy, Armin.”

He kicked me. “I’m helping you and you’re making fun of me. Not smart, Eren.”

I sighed. “So doctor, what’s my problem?”

“Hmph. You’re totally crushing on one of your best friend’s older brother, that’s your problem.”

Well shit.

Suddenly me having a crush on Levi wasn’t just about me anymore. If I hooked up with Levi, wouldn’t that be super awkward for Isabel? And Farlan? Wouldn’t it be weird for someone the same age as your _little_ sister to be dating your  _older_ brother? And then I froze.

“Armin…I’m the same age as Isabel…” He nodded slowly trying to see my point. I couldn’t help, but laugh. “Armin, it totally makes sense. The way he treats me. I wouldn’t be surprised if he just sees me as another little brother. Shit.”

“Eren, that can’t possibly be true. Probably.”

I almost felt like sobbing. “He took in Farlan and Isabel. Hell, the three of them aren’t even related, but they’re just as much siblings as anyone else. I would know, Mikasa and I are the same. You don’t have to be related to be like someone’s brother. And Levi’s probably so used to taking people in that he could easily accept another little brother.” My tone was borderline bitter.

“Eren, you’re overreacting. I know I haven’t ever really seen you two interact, but my gut feeling tells me that he doesn’t have a familial love going for you.”

“Well, you’re a super observant person… Did anything about our interactions hint at him having any kind of romantic feelings for me?” I asked dubiously.

He told me what I already knew. “Well…no. But that doesn’t mean anything! We were only decorating the tree for a few hours! And there are a lot of people here right now. I doubt he’s the type to show a lot of affection in a crowd setting. I was too busy watching you, so I can’t say if he was staring at you as much as you were staring at him anyway.”

I threw myself completely onto the ground with another groan, lying on my back. I turned my head to the side so I could still see Armin.

“Armin,” I suddenly felt tired, “even if he doesn’t like me, it’s not even that big of a deal. Yes, I have a crush on him. I, Eren Jaeger, am crushing very incredibly hard on one Levi Ackerman. I admit it wholeheartedly, but that doesn’t really change anything. I think what I’m trying to say is… I don’t really want it to change either. I just don’t want things to get awkward between us, and if I get myself under control, it won’t.”

“So what? Are you just going to wait for this to blow over?”

“Yeah, pretty much. Levi’s super hot, I’m just lusting after him. I’ve only known the guy for a few months. We didn’t even really talk to each other until October, so yeah I’m right, that’s three months, not even. You can’t really get to know someone in less than three months can you?”

“I don’t know,” Armin said softly.

Something about that tone… Oh shit!

“Armin no! I’m not trying to say anything about you and Erwin! I see the way he looks at you. Even though it’s only been a short amount of time since you met, you guys have spent _a lot_ of that time together. You and Erwin are totally different from Levi and I! Shit, I’m so sorry!”

“Eren, calm down! God. It’s okay. That’s why Erwin and I are _dating._ We want to know more about each other because from what we do know, we really like the other person. You don’t have to be completely in love with Levi for you two to start dating. You could do it just to get to know each other better because you like each other.” He shrugged. “Sure, you might find out that you guys just aren’t meant for one another and that’s okay too.”

I sighed. “His feelings matter too. They may not be familial, but that wouldn’t change him seeing me as just a kid. He’ll probably always see Isabel as his _little_ sister. How could I expect more than that? He’s always calling me ‘brat’ or ‘kid,’ it would make sense if that’s all I am to him. We can’t date each other if I’m just the little kid that hangs with his baby sister.” I crossed my arm over my eyes.

“I don’t think you’ll ever know until you give it a shot.”

“I know. I just need to decide if it’s worth the strain that it could put on my friendship with Isabel and Farlan. Do I want to put my relationship with those two in an awkward position all because I started pining after their brother with some stupid crush?”

“You’re right. That’s something you have to figure out, I’ve never had that problem. But I want you to make sure that it’s just ‘a stupid crush’ before you let Levi slip away. You guys might be good for each other. Even if your relationship ends in ruins, maybe you’ll be able to look back and see that Levi Ackerman actually helped you become a better person.” Armin shrugged.

I nodded. “Thank you Armin. I love you.”

“I love you, too. Even though you’re a drama queen.”

“That’s not very nice, asshat.”

He laughed.

“Relax, I’m only teasing. These are all perfectly legitimate concerns and you have every right to feel them.”

We sat in silence for a few minutes.

“Alright Jaeger bombastic, they’re gonna start wondering where we are.”

We both got up and opened the door to Levi and Erwin sitting on the couch. “We were wondering when you two would come out,” Erwin said when he caught sight of us.

“Yeah,” I grabbed Armin’s shoulders, “Armin finally decided it was time to come on out of the closet. Sure, it took a lot of persuasion, but I think he’s ready.” I clapped him on the back and Armin turned to glare at me as Erwin let out a deep chuckle.

“Well, most of the people I know have been out of the closet for a while.” Erwin joked.

Armin went and sat in Erwin’s lap as Levi eased gracefully to his feet. It seemed like Erwin and Armin could use some time together and I guess Levi agreed. I made my way towards the kitchen only to enter and find a seething Isabel.

“Eren!” She hissed my name.

“Huh? What?”

“I need you to keep Levi distracted!”  She was harshly whispering in my ear while shoving me back towards the door.

“Why? What’s going on?”

“SHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhh! I’m trying to wrap his birthday present, dummy! I thought he and Erwin would talk longer.”

“Doesn’t he already know you got him a Dyson?”

“That’s his _Christmas_ present, I’m wrapping his _birthday_ present.”

Oh.

Oh, shit.

Levi was definitely walking towards the kitchen right now.

“I’m on it, Taichou!”

And with that, she shoved me out of the kitchen straight into Levi.

“Hahaha, hi there Levi!”

“Brat, you have two seconds to get off of me before I clobber you.”

Well, I guess if he was beating me up at least he’d be occupied by something and wouldn’t be in the kitchen.

“One! Tw—”

On second thought! I really don’t want to die today! I quickly let go of his shoulders that I had latched onto when Isabel shoved me. I grabbed his hand instead and pulled him towards the room with the piano in it. Very good, Eren. _Away_ from the Kitchen! There was only one minor problem with the plan.

“Oi brat! What the fuck?!”

Yep, there’s the problem.

“I have more questions,” I said quickly, pulling him onto the couch where I had thrown myself.

“Then maybe you shouldn’t have fallen asleep on me the one time I was willing to let you ask them!”

My face may have heated up a little at that. It was on this couch too, wasn’t it? “W-Well it’s not like I meant to fall asleep, it just kind of happened,” I muttered.

He was still looking at me with crossed arms.

  
“C’mon Levi, you know you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to.”

He huffed, but made himself more comfortable on the couch. I couldn’t help but smile. Victory!

“Well, brat? What are the questions?”

The way he said ‘brat’ sent a small pang through me and I felt my smile slipping a little.

“Uhhh well, I uhh wanted to know when your birthday is.”

“That’s not really a question.”

“Ugh, Levi! Fine. When is your birthday?”

He scowled and looked away. “December 25th.”

My brain did that thing where the gears turn and you process the shit that people say to you.

“Wait, but that’s Christmas!”

He rolled his eyes. “ _Very good, Eren._ ” I could almost touch the sarcasm in the air.

“But why didn’t you tell me?!!! What if I didn’t find out before it was your birthday and then I didn’t even get to wish you a ‘happy birthday’?! And it’s your 30th too! Isn’t that supposed to be a big deal?!”

“Tch. No. It’s not _supposed_ to be anything.”

“B-Bu—”

He cut me off before I could continue. “And aren’t you supposed to go before asking another question?”

“I will, just give me a sec! I’m mad at you!”

“Oh?”

“Yes! I can’t believe you didn’t tell me your birthday was so soon! How could you think that I wouldn’t want to get you a birthday present, shithead?!”

I grabbed a pillow and moved to smack him in the face with it. Only he caught my wrists. But he didn’t stop my momentum, so I ended up with one of my arms braced on the arm of the sofa behind his head while the other was still trapped in his grip. Our faces were unexpectedly close to each other and I suddenly felt embarrassed.

“Well I guess we’re not really that close and it would be awkward to just tell me when your birthday is. It’s a little weird, right?” I gave him a small smile, but I wasn’t able to keep my expression as neutral as I wanted to.

He sighed, “No you idiot. I didn’t refrain from telling you when my birthday is because I don’t _like_ you. I just hate when people make a big deal out of that shit. Honestly, if you just got me a small Christmas card, I would be fine. I don’t need people to shower me with gifts just because I’ve been on this planet for another fucking year.”

“Ok.” I was quiet for a few seconds, just thinking over what he said. I guess Levi didn’t seem like the type who made a big deal out of things like birthdays. “Can I still get you a birthday present?”

He made an exasperated sound. “Yeah, brat, you can get me a fucking birthday present.”

“Thank you.” I smiled.

“Dumbshit. You don’t _thank_ people for telling you that you can buy them a birthday present.”

“Well I said ‘thank you’ because it made me really happy.”

I swear I saw his neutral expression slip and a light coloring appear on his face. But I must have been imagining it because in a second it was gone, only to be replaced by a scowl and a, “Tch, shitty brat. Whatever.” He turned his face to the side and stared off.

“Hey, Levi?” I asked faintly. He looked back at me.

“What, brat?”

“I’m gonna make you the most fucking amazing birthday cake you’ve ever seen in your life.”

His eyes widened. When his face relaxed he had a small smile.

“I’d like that,” he said softly.

It was my turn to blush. I couldn’t stop the wide grin that spread over my face either.

He released my wrist and ran a hand over his face. I took that as a cue to put some distance back between our faces again. I relaxed back onto the side of the couch with my back on the arm. Sure the couch wasn’t that big so our legs were still touching, but I tried to avoid thinking about that so I could get the temperature of my face to calm the fuck down.

“You know, you never answered the damn question yourself.”

Oh. “My Birthday is March 30th.”

He nodded.

If it were anyone else I would have just said it flippantly, knowing that they probably wouldn’t remember it anyway. But Levi’s different. I know that once I tell him something about myself he commits it to memory. And I do the same for him.

“My turn.”

“Ok. Shoot.”

“That necklace around your neck,” He pointed at the golden key, “what’s the significance?”

“Oh ummm. Actually my father gave it to me. I wear it all the time because it’s one of the few things I actually have from him. It reminds me of the times back when we were all together. He’s pretty distant now and our relationship is a bit rocky, but I know he still loves Mikasa and I. And we still love him. Just because someone goes away doesn’t mean you stop loving him or her. We’re still family. We always will be. And this reminds me of that.”

His eyes were boring into mine. I had his full attention. At first, I felt awkward and looked down at my hand, wrapped around the key as I told him about my dad, but I found my eyes aching to look back up to see if he was still watching me. So I did. And he was staring at me like I was the only other person in the world.

“You always refer to your mother in the past tense and now you’re only referencing your relationship with your dad. She’s dead?”

I nodded. “She passed away when I was in middle school. My father was really torn apart. He really threw himself into his work and now he’s back in Europe. I think he wanted to be there because there are so many memories of my mother there. They both lived and got married in Germany, she’s actually originally from Turkey, but...” I shrugged. “Germany has a lot of happy memories for him.”

He nodded again in understanding. “I guess I owe you a back story now, too.”

“Umm, it’s okay if you don’t want to. I’m sure your life was no walk in the park.”

“No, it’s okay.” He inhaled deeply and then began. “I was actually raised by my uncle after my mother passed away. I have no idea who my father is or was. Farlan is my uncle’s stepson from his first wife. She ended up dying a few years after they married, I’m not actually completely sure how. Isabel was the godchild of my uncle’s second wife. Her parents died and we took her in. My uncle’s second wife also passed away. Except she took my uncle with her. Nasty car accident.”

“How did you guys end up in the U.S.?”

“Well, I was actually in my final year of college when my uncle passed away so I was able to get my degree. I met some amazing people, including a woman named Rico Brzenska, who got me involved in a fashion magazine. Then I met Erwin. He offered me a well-paying position that could definitely give me enough money to support Isabel and Farlan. But the catch was that we would have to move. And obviously, we wouldn’t be speaking our primary language anymore. A lot of schools in France teach English from a young age, but it’s nothing like coming to America and knowing that you _have to_ speak English. I’m incredibly lucky that I met Erwin when I did. We eventually became good friends and, a few years later, I became friends with Hanji too, after we hired her at the company. You pretty much know the rest.”

“Wow. I guess we’re no strangers to death or drama huh? I’m secretly the main character of an anime, I hope you know.”

“Hah. And how do you figure that brat?”

“Well, like I said, I lost my mom and I have a distant father. I’m like the real life version of Edward Elric here!”

“Loser,” he grumbled, though his tone didn’t have any bite to it. “And just because you can list off _one dude_ who doesn’t have parents around doesn’t prove that all main characters are like you.”

“Oh ho ho. Just one you say? Well how ‘bout this! Tomoya from Clannad: deceased mother and he has a rough relationship with his dad. Lucy from Fairy Tail: deceased mother, rough relationship with her dad. Rin from Blue Exorcist: dead mom and, uhhh wow, _really_ rough relationship with his dad. Lelouch from Code Geass: dead mom and definitely a rough daddy bond there. See?”

“Impressive.” He said with a rather big roll of his eyes.

“Yep. Gotta know my competition before I make my debut.”

“Hmmm, yeah. But are you sure you’re main character material? Isn’t it just as probable that I would be the main character? I mean, no offense, but I lost two sets of guardians, not to mention Isabel and Farlan’s parents. I feel like my life is the more tragic one here.”

“Main character traits do not revolve around who has the most tragic story,” I huffed, “besides, I’m funnier. People would like me more.”

He grinned. “Yeah Eren, you could be that incredibly minor, unimportant character who provides comic relief. After all, you’re the dude that ripped off his shirt and ran around in October half naked.”

“Fuck you. I refuse to be demoted from main character to fan service! At least let me be the love interest!” Shit shit shit. I didn’t mean to say that out loud. “I don’t know who it would be for yet, but we could find someone I’m sure.” I laughed and did my best to play off my fuck up. “I would totally be ‘the best friend,’ but I feel like Erwin beat me to that position. Not to mention Hanji. Uhhh, I’m a lowly minor character!”

Levi laughed, “You can be the cook.”

“Ugh. Fuck you, I deserve better than that. I’m gonna make my own spin off series.”

I was really glad that Levi seemed to have missed the little screw up I had.

“Eren?”

“Yeah?”

“Are you gay?”

I felt my eyes widen. Fuck. He totally noticed. He knows. He knows. He knows!

Shit. What if he’s homophobic?

Pfff, he works at a fashion mag. There’s no way he’s homophobic. Right?

Well, he’s always answered my dumbass questions honestly.

“Yeah.” I said it confidently, but as soon as the word came out, my confidence went with it. His face remained neutral, giving me nothing.

“Sorry, if that makes you uncomfortable. I mean I’ve met a lot of people who feel kind of awkward after they find out I’m gay. I understand and it’s fine.” I can back off if you want me to. It was unsaid, but implied.

Suddenly, I was playing with a pillow that had magically appeared in my lap and it was a very interesting pillow indeed.

“I’m bisexual.”

My head shot up.

“You...uhhh…wow…I’m glad you felt comfortable telling me that.” I smiled sincerely.

“Well duh, dipshit. I have to answer the question too, so if I ask you, I better as hell be prepared to tell you about me.”

My cheeks were red. Well at least he’s not homophobic. And he does date guys so I guess I have a shot with him after all. I shook my head. Stupid Eren, what are you thinking? I thought we agreed to move past the crush?!

But with this in my head, I knew there was no way I was going to let Levi go that easily. After all, if you don’t fight, you can’t win.

“Oi, brat. What the fuck are you smiling about? It’s creepy.”

“I was just thinking about how much I like talking to you.”

“Fucking brat.” He turned his head away to hide his face.

I whipped out my phone and took a picture.

“Hey! What the fuck?!”

He sprang across the couch and went for my phone.

“No! I won’t let you take this from me! You’re face was so cute!”

He jabbed me harshly in the side and began fuming. “Oh, you’ll be so lucky if I let you live now. I swear I’m going to make you bl—”

“Wait! No, you can’t delete that, I need it for reference!”

He calmed down a little and briefly stopped stabbing my pressure points with his fingers. “Reference for what?” His face was a mixture of disgust and curiosity.

“I got an idea while I was sitting there for something I can do as a present.”

“Well feel free to tell me.”

“What? No, you moron! I’m not telling you what your present is!”

He moved his finger next to the trash button. “Last chance.”

“How the fuck did you even figure out my password?”

“Please. You’re so fucking obvious.” He scoffed at me. “Now you’ve got three seconds to tell me what exactly needs a picture of my face.”

I grumbled, “A drawing, stupid. What else?”

“A drawing?”

“Yes, I was going to draw you. Now will you please give that back?!”

“This is a terrible picture. Your phone doesn’t even take good quality shots.”

“Well, would you actually sit still long enough for me to draw you?!!” I yelled frustrated.

He crossed his arms across his chest and looked towards the doorway of the room. He was still pretty much on top of me, pinning me down. I was still yelling at him for being completely ridiculous and unfair when he spoke.

“If you just asked, I probably would.”

I froze.

“You would?”

“Don’t make me repeat myself, brat.” He snapped.

Holy fuck. He just agreed to sit still and let me draw him. Shit. Uhhh, if I don’t do it now he might change his mind and I can’t bug him about it because if he gets mad it’s all over, and shit what if I draw him and he doesn’t like it?

“Oi.” He flicked my forehead.

“Owwww.” I whined and started rubbing it.

“Stop freaking out. I can see the panic written across your face like an open book. I won’t go back on something I said I would do and if it’s to sit still while you draw me, then fine.”

“And no matter what you draw, I’ll probably like it.” He added.

 Shit, I was happy. I needed my art supplies.

“Hey Eren, Mikas— Hohoho!”

So. Levi was still kind of on top of me. And I could see how that would be cause for [misunderstanding](http://img.addfunny.com/files/uploads/pic/10/10/84583_v0_600x887.jpg). And apparently so did Levi.([p](http://31.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lq4oi4NPC31qmgw6lo1_400.gif))

Before I could even blink, Levi was behind Isabel and she was in a headlock.

“Breath a word of this to _anyone,_ ” he began in a silky smooth voice that sent shivers down my spine, and I wasn’t even the one in a headlock right now, “and I’ll know. Which means what?”

“I’m dead where I stand,” Isabel wheezed.

“Correct. So, do we have an understanding here?”

“Yes. Yes, we do.” She rasped.

“Wonderful. Just what I like to hear.”

With that, he released her and she stuck her tongue out at him when he turned his back to leave the room.

I guess party time was over.

“So, like I was saying, Mikasa is looking for you. She wants to get going soon. Was that uhhh anything _interesting_?”

“Hgn. Yeah, you could call it interesting. I took a picture of him and he was on me like lightening. Deleted the damn thing and all.”

“Oh. Sucks. Sorry man.”

“Yeah. Hey Isabel! Do you mind if I borrow your kitchen to bake Levi a birthday cake?”

Her mouth dropped open. “Did the idea of me ever saying ‘no’ actually cross your mind?”

“Uhhh, not really, no.”

“Yeah good, cuz that would be absurd. Come over whenever the hell you want. And you can leave the presents you brought today under the tree, but I will have you know that if you don’t come on Christmas, I will drive to your house and drag you here with my bare hands.”

“Okay, geez, crazy lady. God, you’re as scary as your brother.”

I didn’t see Levi again before Mikasa and I left, but I did get Isabel to tell me what days he would be home so I could come over to draw him. And what days he wouldn’t be home, so I could come over and bake his cake.

Funny how that works.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anime:
> 
> Shugo Chara  
> Kamisama Hajimemashita (or kamisama kiss)  
> Naruto  
> Ao no Exorcist (Blue exorcist)  
> Hunter X Hunter
> 
> A little bit of 'Every anime ever' too.  
> (there are two pics of awkward moments. One is from The familiar of Zero and the there is from Ouran High School Host Club)


	13. Do You Have Any Idea How Stupid I Am?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Do you have any idea how stupid we are? Don't underestimate us!" -Gintama
> 
> Eren draws Levi, bakes him a cake, and then comes back for christmas.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooooooooo I'll be straight with you guys. Eren gets drunk. No, not right away...He's totally okay though because he has Levi to take care of him. *winks dramatically. I mean sure it's a little sad that Eren can't handle his liquor too well, but at least he's adorable.
> 
> Also like the previous chapter this one is also on the long side.
> 
> Enjoy ヽ(´▽｀)ノ

I had Levi sitting on one of the kitchen stools facing me. I was sitting on a normal chair I had pulled out from the kitchen table and had a drawing board propped up against the back of another chair that was positioned in front of me.

For the third time, Levi leaned forward. I glared at him. He was either still trying to get a look at the paper or he was just trying to piss me off.

He crossed his arms in defeat. “You can’t seriously blame me for wanting to see it.”

Well, yeah, I could understand the urge, but dear God it was still annoying.

“I’ve never seen you have problems sitting still before.”

He scowled at me.

“You know Levi, if you keep making that face that’s what I’m going to draw.” His face immediately returned to a neutral expression and I burst into a wide grin.

“So,” I started letting my mind wander as my hand recreated Levi on a piece of drawing paper, “I hope you don’t mind if I take certain liberties with this. I’m planning on killing two birds with one stone here.”

“I’m going to take a random guess and say that you’re not going to tell me what you’re talking about.”

“Correct.”

My ultimate plan was to make an anime version of Levi. It was going to be the most beautiful thing I’d ever created too.

It was also part of my agenda to get him to be a little more accepting of anime. See? Two birds with one stone.

I still hadn’t decided if I wanted to draw a large picture and then color it in with my markers, or make it digital art. Either way, I needed a realistic sketch of his face to work with, so that’s what I was working on now. So far, I had drawn him from three different angles.

 I also want to do a group picture. Something with him, Isabel, and Farlan. Something where they were all happy and together.

“Levi, do you prefer night or day?”

“What?”

“Daytime or nighttime. Which one do you like better?”

“Is this for the drawing?”

“What? No. Why?”

“Because that’s a weird-ass question, that’s why. Who the hell asks that?”

“I do!” I went back to drawing. So much for making conversation!

He sighed. “I don’t get along with sleep very well so a lot of times I end going for a walk or some shit. Or sitting outside and just watching the stars.” I looked up at his face. He stared back at me unflinchingly. You could always count on Levi for that.

“So, is that a vote for night time?”

“Yeah. I guess.”

“Okay.”

I guess for the group picture I could use that. Have the three of them sitting outside. Maybe on a roof or some shit.

“Oi brat, you’re supposed to answer the question, too.”

We fell into a comfortable banter. I had some trouble deciding how to answer some of the questions so we spent some time debating the pros and cons of different choices.

He asked more questions too.

“Where do you work? You know I work at Recon so I don’t have to answer this one.”

“Well, we have a friend of the family who owns a restaurant. Normally someone my age wouldn’t be hired as a cook, but since Hannes knows me personally he let me have the job. He keeps telling me that I could become a chef in a high-class restaurant if I wanted to.”

“Your turn to ask a question.”

“Hnnnn, but I can’t think of one right now...”

“Then just say something about yourself and I’ll respond or replicate it.”

“Like what?”

“God kid, you’re slow. What’s something you’ve always wanted?”

“Well, there are a lot of things I want,” I said softly.

He rolled his eyes.

“Fine. Something feasible. Like you could go to a store on Saturday and get it, but you just don’t have the time or money right now.”

I tapped my chin thinking. It was hard to think of something I wanted that I could get right now if possible.

“Well, I’ve always thought getting a tattoo or some piercings would be cool. Like maybe something on my ear right here.” I gestured with my fingers. “You’d probably look cool with piercings, Levi. Like a total badass.”

“You want me to wear earrings?” he mocked.

“Hey, tons of dudes in anime wear earrings! Like [Ciel](https://www.google.com/search?q=ciel+phantomhive&biw=1280&bih=605&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0CAYQ_AUoAWoVChMIqPu92p_hxwIVBJyACh3vRQjh#imgrc=lbQ-lmNYxdIMqM%3A)! And [Kurapika](http://www.cosplayhouse.com/images/D/Hunter-X-Hunter-Cosplay-Kurapika-Cosplay-Prop-Version-01-Earrings-003.jpg) has one I’m pretty sure. A bunch of people in “[Magi](http://myanimelist.net/anime/14513/Magi:_The_Labyrinth_of_Magic)” have earrings and [Kise](https://em.wattpad.com/08ab2fa062913157ebfa7c31331ef3dabbe3cb1e/687474703a2f2f6469656c696c62616b656d6f6e6f2e66696c65732e776f726470726573732e636f6d2f323031332f30382f6b75726f6b6f2d6e6f2d626173756b652d32342d373230702d6d6b765f736e617073686f745f31302d33345f323031332d30362d30385f30302d34332d3035322e6a7067) ([x](http://myanimelist.net/anime/11771/Kuroko_no_Basket)) has ‘em and so does [Shikamaru](http://static.comicvine.com/uploads/original/13/132016/2637466-shikamaru.jpg) and ummmm [Zero](http://images4.fanpop.com/image/photos/20200000/-Vampire-Knight-Guilty-Episode-1-Sinners-Of-Fate-zero-kiryuu-fanclub-20257661-1920-1080.jpg)! There! If you want to be a sexy vampire again next year, you could add an earring to be even sexier!”

“Hah. Who said anything about being a vampire again next year? I fucking hate those parties. I only go because of Farlan and Isabel.” He ended softly.

“Oh c’mon, you’re gonna give up your only chance to say ‘[I’ll bite you to death](http://33.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mf66h8XutO1rupdzu.jpg)’ and actually have it be somewhat applicable?”([x](http://myanimelist.net/anime/1604/Katekyo_Hitman_Reborn!))([v](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P2LyWYDMq8k))

He looked at me appalled. “That’s just disgusting.”

I rolled my eyes at him. Such a clean freak.

                                                                                            

“Fine. Earrings are whatever. So if you could only have one _tattoo,_ what would it be?”

“Well, _one more_ or one total? ‘Cause if it’s one total then I guess I’ve already maxed out.”

“But how would yo—wait! You have a tattoo? Shit, that’s so cool! Where is it? What is it? Is it one of those ‘symbolizes a deeper meaning’ tattoos?”

“Holy fuck! One question at a time, brat.”

“Okay, okay. So, what is it?”

He sighed. My excitement must have been tangible and I’m pretty sure I was grinning like a madman.

“It’s the Wings of Freedom. It’s a symbol to show that I’m not caged. I make my own choices.”

“That’s…Wow.” I had never thought of Levi having a tattoo, but if he did have one, I thought that suited him well. “Ummm…where is it?”

“It’s on my back.”

“Can I see?” He raised his eyebrows. “Uhhh, I mean, it is kind of personal and if you don’t want to I won’t be offended or anything…”

He just stared at me as I rambled off reasons.

“Oi brat. It’s fine. I just wanted you to realize that you just asked me to take my shirt off.”

Oh…uhhh…fuck… It’s not like I had originally intended to ask him to take his shirt off! God. Stupid Levi. He was intentionally trying to make me feel embarrassed.  And it was maybe working a little. I couldn’t deny that the idea of a shirtless Levi definitely held some appeal to it. But Levi didn’t need to know that.

 “I’m an artist.” I let my tone sound a bit offended and then added, “Nudity means nothing to me,” in a firm voice.

He chuckled, “yeah, guess so.” With that, he slid off the stool and took off his shirt.

And DAMN.

Like DAMN!!! I figured I had nice abs, but seeing Levi shirtless made me feel like those two hours I had spent at the gym yesterday were a complete and utter waste of time.

Then he was smirking at me.

“You sure you want me to turn around?” He asked in a smug voice.

I huffed at him and he chuckled again. He turned around to reveal the large tattoo on his back. Before I knew what I was doing, I had set my drawing down on the table and I was standing behind him to get a closer look. It extended from his mid-back to his shoulders. A black wing crossed under another wing, which was colored white. I lifted my hand and brushed my fingers over the white wing.

He shivered under my touch. “Oi, brat, I never said you could touch!”

I pulled my hand away like I had just made contact with fire. “Oh sorry…I didn’t mean to do that.”

He was warm under my fingers. And I really liked that tattoo. Levi was just so interesting; right when I thought I knew him I would learn something else.

“Tch. Whatever. It’s fine.” He glanced over at the table. “I’m two seconds away from looking at it.” He warned.

That brought me back to the present.

It didn’t really matter if he saw the sketch since the final animated version would look really different.

“I’ll kick your ass!” I yelled grabbing the board and my sketch.

He just laughed at me.  Especially after seeing him with his shirt off, we both knew that couldn’t possibly be true.

“By the way, Mikasa is graduating next week if you guys want to come. She finished a semester early.”

“You know, I think we might.”

I smiled. “Okay, I’ll save you seats.”

~~~

“Isabel!!!”

She stopped with her hand still in midair.

“I swear to Jesus, Buddha, and Vishnu, if you don’t stop trying to eat the fucking ingredients I need to finish the cake, I’m going to send you to a world of pain and misery ruled by man-eating giants WITH MY FOOT!!!”

“Wow…Don’t you think that’s a little extreme?”

“Not at this point! If I see you take one more finger full of icing before I’m done, I’m going to lose my mind. And I can’t guarantee your safety if I do.”

She pouted but sat back down at the counter. “But Eren, I’m bored and the food smells soooooo yuuuummmyy!”

I sighed. “Go get your computer.”

“What? Why?”

“Because I’ll show you something that’ll keep you occupied and won’t require me to stop what I’m doing.”

She promptly obliged and followed my instructions.

“What are these?”

“Ever heard of AMVs?”

She shook her head. “No.”

“Wonderful. You’re gonna love these. Basically they’re animated music videos, they’re really entertaining. Sometimes it’s the song or the story idea behind the video, and other times it’s just the editing that’s absolutely amazing. A great AMV has all three.”

“Oooohhh”

“Now watch the damn [videos](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3xZ3bZiIl-Y&list=PLCyUbTo4zZ9ok-bMeEWTA3o0yQYeHtZ_t&index=9) and stop touching my fucking cake!”

Luckily, she was kept fully occupied by the videos.

“Hey Eren, I really like the[ Food Fight one](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_XqIoecofgw&index=20&list=PLCyUbTo4zZ9ok-bMeEWTA3o0yQYeHtZ_t).”

“The one where they all try to get the boxed lunches?”

“Yeah. It was cool.”

“Keep going. My favorites are towards the bottom. I like Anime’s Got Talent, and not gonna lie, the Pony Note gets me every time.”

When I finally finished the cake, she was still watching AMVs.

“Hey Izzy, one last thing I wanna show you before I leave. Open up a new page and type in the URL ‘[dollars-bbs.org](http://dollars-bbs.org)’.”

“Okay.” She did it and I saw the Dollar’s page pop up.

“Wait Eren, what’s the password?”

“You know, they show it in the anime so you should know the password.”

“I don’t remember! Errrrrreeeeennnnnn teeeeelllll meeeeee!!!!”

“OK! Geez! The password is Baccano.”

“What? Why Baccano?”

“There are [a lot of crossovers](http://durarara.wikia.com/wiki/Naritaverse) between the two shows. It’s actually really cool.”

I left shortly thereafter with one last threat to Isabel about what would happen if I found any fingerprints on the cake.

~~~

“I hope you guys didn’t start the party without us,” I said with a broad smile as Levi pulled open the door.

“Well, it’s not like we need you here anyway.” He tried to say it callously, but I could see the smile tugging at his lips.

“Yeah, yeah, Merry Christmas to you too.”

He threw the door open for Mikasa and me to come in. Mikasa quickly hung up her coat and went to go put the rest of the presents we brought under the tree. There were a lot since we brought the ones we would be giving to each other, plus Armin and Erwin’s, and my birthday present for Levi. I stayed back and waited for Levi to close the door. As soon as he did, I pulled him into a hug. He had no time to protest.

“Happy birthday, Levi.”

I said it directly next to his ear and then let go of him to bolt towards the kitchen before he could register what was happening and punch me in the face.

“Hey Farlan, are we the only ones here so far?”

“Nope.” He pointed behind me.

“EREN!!!”

Oh. Hanji’s here.([g](http://38.media.tumblr.com/6e5bfc78a4277f3430869c0427f8d2e7/tumblr_n587y0Hzcb1rh9rfqo7_250.gif))

“Eren! It’s so good to see you again! You’re even cuter than I remembered you being. I swear I’m going to get a picture of you and Levi and put it on my desk! You look all adorable with those lovely eyes! And your cheeks are all rosy from the cold! Oh, it’s enough to make someone swoon!”

“Hi Miss Hanji. How are you?”

“Oh, I am doing very well! But dear, don’t call me Miss Hanji, it makes me feel old.”

With that, she finally released me.

The doorbell rang again and I heard Levi yell, “FARLAN,” from somewhere. Farlan bolted up and grabbed the door. I heard Erwin and Armin’s voices as they shuffled into the house and exchanged greetings with Farlan. The two of them walked into the house and placed their presents next to the tree; there wasn’t any room left underneath it. Armin smiled at me and pulled me into a hug while Erwin brought the bottle of wine he was holding to the kitchen.

“GUYS, DINNER!!!” Isabel yelled as loudly as she could. Everyone rushed to go sit at the table, which was adorned with various red and green embellishments and piled with food that looked delicious. God, I love these people.

~~~

The cake was brought out and we all sang ‘Happy Birthday’ to Levi. Then we stuffed our faces with dessert until we felt sick. I caught Levi looking at me and I smiled at him happily. He ducked his head but returned a small smile of his own.

Everyone migrated to the family room after putting their dishes on the counter to be washed. We were all really excited to open presents, after all.

I sat next to the tree and pulled out presents at random for people to open in front of everyone. Levi’s Dyson was probably the biggest box and Isabel had to help me give it to him.

“Izzy, this is to you from me.” I handed her the present I had gotten for her and waited excitedly for her to open it. She pulled it out and I saw her face fill with awe.

“Eren, [it’s](https://www.google.com/search?q=Starfish+lamp&client=safari&rls=en&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0CAgQ_AUoAmoVChMIipPa4eDZxwIVCYUNCh0SJQN4&biw=1280&bih=607#imgrc=FD4HiK-Rg-U-wM%3A) beautiful! And it’s so cool!” She read the note, “'Izzy, [please accept this startfish.](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/a3/42/ed/a342ed26bff3e91f2a14c7f923066610.jpg)’ OH MY GOD, I LOVE YOU!!! You’re such a loser, but you’re perfect!” She set the starfish lamp down before tackling me with a hug.

Mikasa opened my present with a smile. Her smile got even broader after pulling out the beautiful blue silk scarf I had bought for her. It had become a tradition for me to buy her a scarf every year on Christmas.

Isabel had gotten me a huge poster of Rin Okumura and I promised to love her for forever.

We had decided to leave Levi’s presents for last.

“Alright, I have a feeling I’m gonna need a glass of wine before this.”

With that said, the coffee table became littered with glasses and a bottle of wine that somehow kept refilling itself. Or more like Hanji kept getting more to replace the finished one.

Isabel and Farlan grabbed some beer to bring out. Erwin politely declined alcohol, while Hanji grabbed herself a glass of wine and Moblit grabbed a beer. After receiving a look from Mikasa for finishing her glass of wine, I grabbed one too.

Before I could dish out the next box under the tree, Hanji leaned forward and presented Mikasa with an envelope. 

“What’s this?”

“Why don’t you open it and find out?” Hanji said sweetly.

She pulled out a letter and her eyes raptly scanned the page.

“I-I don’t understand.”

“My assistant is leaving after New Years. I want you to take the position.”

“Holy shit,” she said softly.

“Well, we’re gonna miss you at the store, but we think you should take it if it helps any.”

“But I’m fresh out of college, is it really okay to let me be your assistant?”

“Yep! More than okay. I’ve seen the way you work and if you’re not top-notch stuff, then I don’t know what is. So, do you want it?”

Mikasa looked over at me for support. I smiled at her and shrugged.

“I want it!”

“WHOOOO!” Hanji yelled. We all raised our glasses and cheered.

“Welcome to the company.” Erwin added.

Levi nodded in agreement.

“Okay Levi, have at it,” Izzy directed, handing him a box. He opened it and pulled out a plain white [T-shirt](http://ih1.redbubble.net/image.36452279.5288/fig,white,mens,ffffff.u3.jpg). As he pulled it open, he found the box that I had wrapped in the shirt. He read the words on the t-shirt and simply shook his head.

“Cute, brat. I guess you’ll always be a loser, huh?” He did smirk though.

He then opened the small box and I suddenly felt self-conscious. The shirt had just kind of been a joke, and something to wrap the box in so he wouldn’t be able to guess what it was when he saw the package.

What if he didn’t like it?

Please like it. Please, please, please. I grabbed Mikasa’s glass off the table and downed it. She shot me a look and then an amused smile before refilling the glass so she could continue sipping it.

His eyes went wide as he pulled out the [tie](https://www.google.com/search?q=burgundy+tie&biw=1280&bih=605&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0CAcQ_AUoAmoVChMIvKHp-d7bxwIVw5INCh1YigaD#imgrc=4KAH4cWj6onJaM%3A) I had bought for him. It didn’t have any pattern on it. It was just a solid burgundy color. A beautiful wine red.

He stared at it for a while. Running his thumb over the fabric.

“I thought you would like the color. I’m sorry that it’s no Dolce&Gabanna.” I couldn’t see his face and it was killing me.

“Tch. Don’t apologize, you idiot. I don’t need a Dolce&Gabanna tie. This one is perfect.”

“So you like it?” I could feel my entire body fill with a buzz.

“Yes, I like it, moron.”

I couldn’t hold back the smile on my face.

It stayed there as he moved on to open his other presents.

Watching him was making me giddy. Kind of like how I was when we were decorating the tree, but different. Like more bubbly.

I had permanently stolen Mikasa’s glass and was happily sipping on the contents.

“So Eren, what happened to my drawings?” Was that anticipation in his voice? I giggled at the thought.

He eyed me with a slightly concerned look.

“Oi, brat, you know this is Port right?”

 I waved my hand at him. “Yeah, yeah, don’t worry about it. I’m only a little wine-happy right now.”

“Okay.” He said taking the bag I had pulled out from under the tree. It was just a simple plastic bag because it was the only thing I could find that was big enough.

The first one he took out was the [portrait of him](http://orig02.deviantart.net/b4c8/f/2014/262/0/3/levi_r___a_choice_with_no_regrets_oad_trailer__by_lurkingintheshadows2-d7zsqtc.png) alone. He was slightly scowling, but even as an anime character he retained that special Levi look.

“You may not like anime, but hey, I’m a 3D animation major so I used my special skills for this one. And yeah, I could’ve made it more realistic, but I like you like this.”

“Wow, it really does look like you,” Farlan mused, looking over Levi’s shoulder.

“It’s a shame that you’re scowling though,” Isabel chirped.

“Shhhh! It’s fine. That was the face he was wearing when I sketched him. It’s his most common expression, guys, you can’t make fun of his natural face.”

“Well, I guess you do have a point.”

“Mmhmm.”

Levi pulled out the original drawing I had made of him by hand. It was just graphite. Nothing fancy, but far better than the sketch I had started with.

The last thing in the bag was the biggest drawing. It had all three of them in it. Isabel and Farlan sat on either side of Levi on a roof. The stars were shining around them and all three of them were smiling. This drawing was also anime-style, but I had used charcoal.([p](http://33.media.tumblr.com/30d18be17afc5b5d3d524d54831e6cfe/tumblr_inline_nep8s4SZBT1rqqyk4.png))

“This is really…wow.”

“Levi, we’re framing this!”

He hadn’t stopped staring at it. We actually had to give him a few minutes to just sit in silence and admire it.

Then it was Hanji’s turn—a few hours ago, she had put an array of boxes under the tree that were all addressed to Levi. Upon opening them, Levi discovered that one of them contained a box of condoms and some lube. He rolled his eyes and reached for another.

“This better be something good, shitty four-eyes.”

He ripped open this box only to reveal a rather… _oddly_ shaped sex toy.

The look on his face was hilarious. I found myself getting cramps from laughing. 

“What in the living fuck…?”

I was having a blast. I filled up my glass again because at some point I had finished it again.

“I know you haven’t had a partner any time recently, so I got you these so you can release all that pent up sexual frustration you have.”

“I am going to kill you. It will be slow and painful and I swear to God I will find a way to do it with this _thing_.”

“You know, I think I might just be okay with ‘death by amazing orgasm’. Based on the reviews that baby got, it hits all the right spots and feels _super intense_.”

For some reason, the only thing my brain could really process was, “I know you haven’t had a partner anytime recently.”

He doesn’t have a partner. He hasn’t had a partner recently.

I want to be his partner…

Suddenly Mikasa’s phone went off.

She stepped out of the room to take the call and returned with a worried look. Any buzz I had from the alcohol disintegrated.

“Mika, what’s wrong?”

“Annie got pretty drunk…she definitely needs a ride home. She’s with Reiner and Berthold right now, but Bert is pretty drunk too and Reiner is trying to take care of both of them himself. I’m going to go get her, are you okay here?”

“I’m fine. Don’t worry about me.”

She was about to head out the door.

“Wait…so I’ll swing by and pick you up, or maybe I should take you home now so I don’t leave you stranded…”

She seemed really conflicted.

“Izzy?” I asked.

Mika raised her eyebrows at me as Isabel made her way over to us.

“What’s up?”

“Think you could gimme a ride later?”

“Yeah, sure. What’s going on?”

“Mikasa’s girlfriend got into some trouble. If she brings me home now, it means that she’s leaving Annie longer at her friend’s house and he already has to take care of another drunk guy. If she comes back and gets me later, it means that she’s leaving Annie at home all alone.”

“She’s not my girlfriend,” Mikasa muttered, face completely flushed.

“Oh, damn. Yeah I can give you a ride or you can just stay here. It's no problem either way.”

I nodded. “See, Mikasa. No problem.” I draped one of my arms around Isabel’s shoulders.

Mikasa sighed in relief, seemingly convinced. “You’ll call me if something happens?”

“Of course, don’t worry.”

She gave one last nod before making her way out the door.

Isabel and I moved back to the couch. I squished next to her and Levi. I was surprised when he didn’t protest. He actually turned and gave me a small nod instead, to indicate that he had heard the conversation that had just happened and was okay with it.

Looking at the coffee table, I noticed that Hanji had gotten Levi more than one sex toy. Each of them was very…uhhh…unique.

I grabbed my wine glass and rejoined the conversation.

After some time, Erwin stood up and announced that he and Armin should get going. A rather bubbly Armin agreed and Isabel helped them carry everything to their car.

She came back and settled into the couch with her back to the armrest and her legs crossed in front of her.

At some point, we had started talking about Moblit’s drinking habits.

“That bad?” I asked.

Moblit held his hands up in surrender.

“You should see Levi! He even has a stash of brandy in his office!” Hanji burst out.

I rounded on Levi.  “YOU!” I didn’t even know what to say. “So it wasn’t a joke huh?!”

“Hanji, you fuckface,” was all he said, dragging a hand down his face.

I poked him in the side, “That’s so unprofessional, Levi! I can’t believe you.”  I frowned at him, but couldn’t stop myself from laughing at how absolutely ridiculous he was.

I finished my glass again. Hanji was sitting closest to the bottle so I got her attention and held my glass towards her. She refilled it without giving a second thought.

“It’s not like I get smashed drinking brandy alone in my office, shithead.”

“Yeah, sure. I bet you go and lock your door and down a glass every time an intern runs away from you. Drowning your sorrows with brandy because they’re all scared of you.”

“Hey, watch it!” He returned my poke to the side, but his was more like a stab. My body instantly reared up and I let out a yelp. Slumping back down, my head rolled against his shoulder as I laughed again.

“That really hurt, Levi! You almost spilled the wine! Why would you do that?” In order to avoid a future spill I decided it would be best to finish the glass and put it on the table.

He poked me in the forehead when I leaned back again. “I’ll let you answer that on your own.”

“Not fair.” I pouted, snuggling closer.

“Eren…” His voice was laced with something I didn’t recognize. “Are you drunk?”

I waved my hand. “Only, like, a little.”

Okay, maybe like a lot.

I took a deep breath. “Levi you smell really nice. Has anyone ever told you that? Because it’s true.”

“And you smell drunk.”

I huffed. “Well I’m allowed to smell drunk if I happen to be drunk!”

“How many glasses did you even drink?”

Suddenly, the alcohol seemed to hit me all at once.

“Idonknow.”

“Oh God, you’re totally a lightweight, aren’t you?”

“What did you say, asshole?! You’re smaller than I am! I bet you’re drunk!” I turned my face to look at him the eye.

“I don’t get drunk, brat.”

I huffed again. “Of course you don’t get drunk. Stupid Frenchman. Oh well, sucks for you. You’ll just never get to experience the wonderful joy of messy drunk sex and waking up in the morning all sore.”

Hanji laughed, “Sorry Eren, I bet you were looking forward to that.”

I felt my cheeks flush and I was about to deny her claims when Levi did it for me.

“Get your head out of your ass, you piece of shit.”

“Well you don’t _both_ have to be drunk. Obviously even if you can’t, Eren sure as hell can.”

“I don’t jump drunk people.”

“But drunk people might jump you, Levi.” I cautioned with a laugh.

He looked at me with raised eyebrows. “I doubt you can even stand, let alone _jump_.”

“Oh, I’m gonna prove you so wrong.”

I attempted to get to my feet to do just that. Only to fail miserably and fall back onto the couch with an, ‘oof’…Landing pretty much in Levi’s lap.

Despite my failure, I was rewarded with a laugh from Levi. And it was right next to my ear. And it made me shudder. And I think I wanted to kiss him.

He put his hands on my hips and pulled me off his lap, scooting over so that now I was in between him and the arm of the couch. His arm was still around my waist and I couldn’t tell if I was dizzy from the alcohol or just him. Everywhere he touched was tingling. I curled up next to him content.

“Eren, I need you to tell me if you feel like puking okay?”

“Wow, happy moment gone, Levi.”

“Happy moment?”

“You were being nice to me. Happy moment. And you smell like happy, too.”

Isabel burst into laughter. “Oh this is precious.”

“Farlan, can you get a bag or bucket? That way, if he does decide to hurl, he doesn’t do it on the fucking couch. Isabel. Water.”

“Aye, Aye, Captain.”

And then they were both off.

I laughed. “Captain Levi commanding his troops. Together, you shall slay the mighty giants!”

“What on earth are you saying?”

“Ooh, Ooh, can I be a squad leader, too?” Hanji asked excitedly.

“Sure! But Levi’s the best. You’re the best too, but Levi’s the best. The Bestest of the best… Levi… I want to build a [sand castle](https://www.google.com/search?q=nisekoi+sand+castle&biw=1280&bih=611&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0CAYQ_AUoAWoVChMIlvmN-pu2xwIVS1Y-Ch39KARX#imgrc=v8hsV89WlHyJtM%3A). And make giants. Like in [Nisekoi](http://myanimelist.net/anime/18897/Nisekoi).”

“Oh my god, Eren, you are so drunk.”

 “I know.” I sighed. “I’m definitely drunk. But I just feel warm and happy. Because I really like all of you guys. I like Izzy. And Farlan’s really cool, and you, Hanji. You’re funny. And Levi. I like Levi, too. Because he seems all mean and scary, but I just think that he’s really great.”

I stopped to take a breath. Normally my filter was already pretty shitty, but under the influence of alcohol, it was completely nonexistent.  “I just want to stay like this. Because Levi is really warm and he’s really nice. Levi, you’re so pretty.”

“Don’t call me pretty.” I felt a flick to my forehead.

“Ow. You hit me again.” I rubbed my head on his chest trying to get the spot he just flicked.

“Hey, Levi? Do you ummm have uhhh Doritos?”

“No, but there’s a whole bunch of MilkyWay that I bought.”

“You bought MilkyWay?! I fucking love MilkyWay!!”

“Shhhh, don’t yell. Yeah I bought MilkyWay for you for Christmas. I didn’t wrap them though, so I was just going to give them to you before you left.”

“Levi, that’s so nice. And you got me that other stuff, too. Like the, the ummm the spices from all around the world. There are so many. And you got me that french foods book too because you remembered that I wanted to learn more french dishes. And I want to make food that you like too. And I was already super happy because I love all of it.” I felt my eyes get teary.

“Levi, you’re so great. You’re like the best person ever. You know what, Levi? You’re right. I shouldn’t call you pretty. I mean you are pretty, but the word. It starts with a ‘p,’ and that’s not really a very nice letter. And… pretty ummm pretty sounds silly…they’re like the same. Because they have the double letter at the end. See, it’s like pretty and silly.”

I think Hanji was doubled over laughing.

“It’s like [fooly cooly](http://myanimelist.net/anime/227/FLCL).” I started laughing. “Levi…there are aliens in Japan. They landed and conquered everything. And then…and then Another.”

“Another what?”

“No one knows. It’s just called Another!”

I was laughing and crying all at the same time. I managed to stop crying, but I couldn’t for the life of me stop laughing.

I suddenly got the urge to touch Levi’s face.

“Oi are you trying to poke my eye out?”

“What… no…no I don’t want to poke your face out… because you’re really beautif…beaufital…” I kept trying again, but I couldn’t remember what I wanted to say. “You’re lovely.”

“Oh lord. I didn’t sign up for this.”

I didn’t notice that Hanji and Moblit had left at some point to go home. When had that happened?

“Levi, do you have my phone?”

“It’s in your pocket, isn’t it?”

“Oh.” I started fumbling with my pants to get it out.

“Eren, what are you doing?”

“No, I just want to tell Mikasa that I love her.”

“Oh no, you don’t!” He grabbed my phone and threw it onto the other couch.

“What, Levi…? Why would phone…my phone?”

“If your sister gets a drunk phone call from you, she’s gonna be pissed. I’m not letting you leave a ten minute long, drunk voicemail of you crying and telling her how much you love her either.”

“I never said cry or or mmrngnm…No…she gets worried…and her [psycho pass](http://myanimelist.net/anime/13601/Psycho-Pass) might go up!”

“It’s okay. She’ll be fine. So will you. She’s taking care of Annie right now and I’ll take care of you, okay?"

I sighed loudly and flopped back onto his chest.

“You can just stay here tonight. Farlan and Izzy have work, but I'm off tomorrow, so you can sleep in as long as you like. Eren, we’re gonna go upstairs, okay?”

I moved my head in a nod.

“Okay, c’mon.”

I started laughing. “Levi, you’re smaller than me though.”

He smirked, “I’m made of solid muscle, remember? Just because I’m shorter than you doesn’t mean I’m smaller.” He helped me to my feet and pretty much carried me towards the stairs.

I crashed down head first onto the first bed I saw. Which was the bed inside the bedroom that Levi had opened the door to.

“What’s that?”

“That’s water and Tylenol that I asked Isabel and Farlan to put on the nightstand. You’re gonna need that tomorrow morning.”

“Ok.”

“Hey brat, no sleeping yet.”

“Huh?” He tugged me towards a room adjacent to the bedroom.

“Levi, I feel kind of ummm”

“Don’t!”

I quickly recognized the room as a bathroom and Levi helped me get to the toilet before I puked.

I felt Levi rubbing circles in my back.

“Let it all out Eren, it’s okay.” He kept muttering reassuring words all while rubbing my back.

Once I was done being friends with the toilet, Levi cleaned me up and brought me back to the bed. He told me to sit and started rummaging around in his dresser looking for something.

“Levi, you can’t find a [Mushi](http://myanimelist.net/anime/457/Mushishi) like that.” I joked. I thought it was really funny too.

He stood up holding a T-shirt and threw it onto the bed and then walked towards the door.

“Wait, Levi, where are you going?

He stopped and turned to me. “I’m going to get Farlan. He and Isabel were going to try and find pants for you. There’s no way in fuck I’m letting you sleep in the jeans you’ve been wearing all day.”

When he came back, he was holding large sweatpants.

He instructed me to take my shirt off and he handed me the new one.

“You know Levi, if you wanted me naked you could have just asked.”

“Shithead. I’ve seen you with your shirt off before, you know.”

“Mmhmm, me too. You have a really nice tattoo. I thought it was really sexy. And I wanted to touch it. Levi, can I touch it?”

“You did touch it.”

“Oh… But you pulled away…so can I touch it again?”

He sighed, “Maybe. Can you put these on?” He asked, giving me the pants.

“Okay.” He held me steady as I changed.

“C’mere.” He pulled me up off the bed.

I giggled. “Are we gonna kiss now?”

“What? No! I swear you…” he shook his head.

“But why not? I wanna kiss you.”

“We’re not gonna kiss. I’m going to put you to bed and then you’re going to sleep.”

“But what about you? Are you going to go to bed?”

He scratched his head and sighed again. “Yeah, I’m going to go to bed. Will you be okay?”

“I think so…”

“Good. I have to grab a blanket to put on the couch.”

“Wait, Levi… Sleeping on the couch fucking sucks. Why can’t you stay here?”

“Well you should be okay, and I’d rather sleep on the couch than here on the floor.”

“But why can’t you sleep in the bed?”

“Because you’re in the bed, shithead.”

“But it’s a big bed…” I said confused. “Levi. Can you please stay? I want you to stay.” I laughed. “C’mon Levi, don’t you want to take this golden opportunity to share a bed with a really sexy dude.”

He scoffed at me.

“C’mon, Levi. Stay.”

He wove his hand through his hair. “You’re gonna be the death of me, brat.”

I smiled happily. “Does that mean yes?”

He went over to his dresser and grabbed another set of nightclothes instead of responding.

As he changed, I stared at him with wide eyes and I felt heat rise to my face.

“Oi, brat! You’re drooling.”

“Oh sorry. You’re sexy.”

He rolled his eyes and climbed into the bed. He frowned.

“What?’

“It’s stuffy.”

“Why…?”

“Nothing. I just don’t usually sleep with…”

“Sexy boys?” I wiggled my eyebrows at him.

“No, you dolt. A shirt. Please, like I’m not used to sleeping with hot guys.”

“Whatever!” I wasn’t sure why I was getting so touchy. “You can take your shirt off. We’re both guys here.”

“You realize how that doesn’t validate anything right?”

“….uhhhh No?”

“You’re gay and I’m bi. Us both being guys doesn’t mean anything. Honestly, with you being gay it just makes it worse.”

“Hey! It’s not like I’m gonna tackle you and try to have sex! I mean, I might if you let me, but I wouldn’t do it.”

He just stared at me like I was incredibly stupid.

I huffed. “Plus you promised I could see your tattoo again and touch it.”

“I said maybe.”

“You fucker. Just take your shirt off. God, don’t be an ass.” I grabbed the hem of his Tee and pulled.

He actually laughed and pulled the shirt off, throwing it somewhere on the floor.

“But if you try anything, brat, I’m gonna kick your ass.”

“Yeah, yeah, roll over.”

He obliged me and soon I was running my hands over his back, tracing the outline of the wings and feeling his defined muscles underneath them. I ran my fingers all the way to the base of the black wing, finding where it ended and then I did the same with the white one. I felt him shudder. I chuckled.

“What, does it feel good?” I asked squeezing closer and continuing to run my hands up and down his back.

“Dumbass. Your hands are cold.”

I laughed. “I’m cold. You should warm me up.” I buried my face in his back and wrapped my arms around him.

“Brat.”

“Levi.” I breathed his name against his skin and deeply inhaled his scent. “I really like the way you smell. I really like you.”

Then all of the sudden I was flipping over and Levi had his arms around me.

“Levi...?”

“Shuddup, brat. Go to sleep.”

I smiled again. “I really like this, too." It was so warm.

"Thank you, Levi.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anime
> 
> Black Butler  
> Hunter X Hunter  
> Magi  
> Kuroko no Basketball  
> Naruto  
> Vampire Knight  
> Reborn!  
> Durarara  
> Baccano  
> Clannad  
> Blue Exorcist  
> Nisekoi  
> Fooly Cooly  
> Gintama  
> Another  
> Psycho Pass  
> Mushishi
> 
> Lots of little Attack on Titan references in this one.
> 
> (I inserted a link to a picture of Levi, Farlan, and Isabel that Eren drew in this fic. Yes I realize that in the picture Levi isn't smiling, but in Eren's he is.)


	14. Not-So-Classified Information

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "That's Classified Information." - The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya
> 
> So Eren wakes up the morning after Christmas and recalls what happened the previous night. After spending some time at the trio's house he learns some new things.  
> A week later is he's finally able to spend some time catching up with all of his friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel bad for not updating on the day that I usually do. *coughs. Or you know the fact that it's like a week late.
> 
> Both my editor and I got kinda stuck on school shit. So even when I finished the chapter it took some time to get it edited. *shakes head sadly
> 
> I swear I don't mean to keep making these chapters so loooonnng. It just kind of happens. Oh well. My dear readers, we are steadily approaching the end. Take that as a good thing or a bad thing ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ but I promise more fluff. Which is ALWAYS a good thing ˚‧*♡ॢ˃̶̤̀◡˂̶̤́♡ॢ*‧˚

I woke up with the most incredible need to pee that I have ever felt in my life. I went to get up, still half asleep, only to find myself trapped in bed by Armin’s arms wrapped around me. His grip was as tight as ever. Yeah, he was warm and I totally love snuggling, but Jesus! Untangling from this was such a pain in the ass.  As I wiggled, I heard a very un-Armin-like moan come from the person who was currently holding me in their arms.

This wasn’t my bed.

The thought hit me hard. And was then followed by: Armin’s arms are _not_ this well built. And he definitely doesn’t sleep shirtless.

The events from last night came rushing back and I quickly sat up (immediately regretting it by the way my head spun,) hurrying to the bathroom.

I stayed in there much longer than necessary. My head pressed against the cool mirror. It was still dark out. I’d guess four or five in the morning.

My head was reeling (not to mention throbbing). Levi was out there—shirtless I might add—in a bed that he probably slept in every night. And I had been snuggling with him in that very same bed.

I was suddenly even more grateful for the cold mirror. I said a lot of shit last night too. The kind of shit I would have _definitely not_ said out loud to Levi in my right state of mind. And not that it matters, but the guy I have a crush on totally thinks that I’m a lightweight now. Plus the fact that I had literally _begged_ him to stay and sleep with me. Like a fucking two-year-old. Not to mention all those times I almost kissed him. I had really wanted to kiss him. I sighed heavily.

Now what?

Do I just go back out there, climb under the covers and fall back asleep?

He was really warm. And comfortable. And he smells ni—EREN!

Ugh. I am so messed up in the head.

“Eren?” The voice was groggy and it was the damn sexiest thing I had ever heard. “Oi, brat, you okay?”

He sounded concerned and it made me wanna die from happiness. I pulled open the door before really thinking it through.

I was so incredibly unprepared for the sight that greeted me.

Levi had pulled himself up and was sitting against the headboard. He had his fingers tangled in his hair as he rubbed his eyes with his palm. He was gorgeous. Absolutely breath-taking.

He threw me a grin. “I was getting worried that you fell asleep while you were constipated and fell in.”

“Stupid.” I scoffed.

The lazy smile was still there and I wasn’t sure what I should do. Do I get back in bed or go downstairs and wait for Farlan and Isabel to get up and drive me home? I mean I could just wait it out on the couch. Levi would probably feel better with that arrangement too…

Well, my body was happy that I had peed, but right now my throat was screaming for water. So I did the best thing I could think of. I walked over to the nightstand, popped a Tylenol and chugged the large glass of water.

“You should sleep some more. Your head will feel better.” Levi was watching me intently.

“What time do Farlan and Izzy head off?”

“They’ll be gone by six forty, but don’t worry about it. I’ll drive you home so sleep as long as you want.”

“Ok.” My voice was softer than I meant it to be.

“Did I wake you up?”

“Not really, no.” He shook his head. “Isabel gets up soon. I usually wake up earlier. If I fall asleep at all… I’m actually surprised that I slept for this long. I guess you’re a nice pillow.”

“Rude.” I said, but I didn’t mean it at all. I was actually really pleased that he had slept well.

“Tch. Are you coming back to bed or not?”

His question startled me. I had been standing awkwardly next to the bed unsure what to do. It looked really warm and inviting, but I wasn’t sure if getting back in was such a good idea. But Levi’s offer was way too good to pass up.

As soon as I shuffled under the covers he pulled me closer. He was still sitting against the headboard. He wove his fingers into my hair and it felt _wonderful_.

“You said some pretty crazy shit last night.”

I groaned loudly. “Don’t remind me. I already feel terrible.”

“And why’s that?”

“Well first off, I was spouting out every fucking thought that passed through my distorted brain without a moment’s hesitation. Not to mention, I got completely drunk after my sister rushed off to go help her drunk girlfriend! She’s gonna kill me.”

He snickered. “It’s quite likely. I guess you owe me one ‘cause I stopped you from sending her any drunk messages.”

“Oh God. Yeah, thanks for that. That would’ve been a _disaster_.” I went quiet and just listened to the sound of him breathing next to me. I definitely owed him more than just _one_ for last night.

“Levi?”

“What brat?”

“Thank you.” I curled up further into the blankets. At that moment I knew that there was absolutely no way in hell that I would be able to get over my crush on him now.  If anything, it had grown to a million times its original size. Sure, him seeing me drunk was super embarrassing, but…

I hid my face in the pillows.

Well, at least I didn’t pop any awkward boners last night. That’s definitely something to be proud of. At least I don’t think I did. And I was sooo not about to ask Levi for confirmation on that one.

“Go to sleep, Eren.”

~

The second time I woke up the bed was empty.

I decided that I should probably make my way downstairs.

And was greeted with…ummm… _a surprise_ ….

Levi was in the family room with his brand new Dyson, a bunch of bottles, and different dusting tools. He had a white handkerchief covering half his face and another one on his hair.

I couldn’t help it. I burst into laughter as soon as I saw him.

He pulled down the handkerchief to scowl at me.

“Anything to say, brat?”

“Holy shit. You look just like [Yato](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/a8/71/f8/a871f84151d8589b61ed3cfc8ee807e4.jpg)! Oh my God, I’m dying.”

Of course, Levi likes to clean—I already knew that he was a clean freak—but the handkerchief was just too much.

I was still doubled over laughing when a rag smacked me in the face.

“Tch. Loser. ”

He returned to cleaning, but then paused and added, “Go eat breakfast.”

Sure enough, I found breakfast waiting for me when I walked into the kitchen. A part of me was kind of hoping it would be French toast so I could make fun of Levi more. Instead, I found fresh strawberries and pancakes. But hey, Levi made me breakfast, I wasn’t complaining.

As I sat down to eat I pulled out my phone to give Mikasa a call. Hopefully she wasn’t worried about me.

Strangely, she didn’t pick up. Confused, I dialed her number again and waited. This time I was greeted with a groggy, “Hello.”

It sounded like Mikasa…

I glanced at the time. It was a little past noon. Why the hell did Mikasa sound groggy?

“Hey Mika, it’s Eren. You okay?”

“Oh shit yeah.” I heard some fumbling on the other side followed by some whispering. I couldn’t make out what was being said, but there was someone right next to Mikasa.

“Sorry, I’m not home yet. You must have been surprised to find the house empty.”

“Actually, I was calling to say that I’m not home either…”

“Oh… so you’re still with Levi?”

“Uhhhh yeah…and you’re with Annie?” It wasn’t really a question. 

I wondered if she and Annie had made any progress. At least we both knew that Annie seeing her as a brat wasn’t part of the problem.

I almost laughed at the idea of anyone seeing Mikasa as a kid. Even though she was only a year older than me, comparing the two of us was a waste of time.

Would Levi like someone like Mikasa more than me?

Aaannnd the emotional shit was back. I shook my head. Well duh! Of course he would. Anyone would. But I can’t change who I am so that shit doesn’t matter. I’ll never try to be someone I’m not.

I sighed inwardly. I’m a homosexual college student that loves anime, cooking and all things art related. I may be a loser, but at least I’m a creative one.

“I guess I’ll see you later then?” Mikasa asked after the rather long silence.

“Not really sure yet. I kind of owe him for last night and he seems to be cleaning right now so I might give him a hand.”

She let out a small laugh. “Alright, Eren. Just don’t break anything.”

“I’m offended! I do not _break_ things!!!”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. The idea of you trying to clean shit while your hands are all shaky and sweaty from the nerves is cute.”

"Mika! That shit's [classified](http://images5.fanpop.com/image/polls/1078000/1078339_1342591055734_full.png)!"

We bantered back and forth for a little bit.

Then there was an awkward pause where I asked Mikasa about the car for tomorrow and she took a little too long to respond.

“Mika…?” I listened carefully. It wasn’t necessarily quiet. At first, I just thought that it was static or some shit. I was trying to figure out if she was still there when it clicked.

“MIKASA! DON’T KISS PEOPLE WHEN YOU’RE ON THE PHONE!”

She made a startled noise like she hadn’t expected me to still be here.

“Anniegrabbeddmeit’snotmyfault.”

“That’s not an excuse.”

“Whatever Ere-”

“Okay bye.” I hung up before she could say anything else. I would probably get an angry text about that later.

With my question about the current relationship status between Mikasa and Annie answered, I returned to my breakfast.

When I finished, Levi was still cleaning.

I slumped against the wall with a grin… And did what anyone else would do. I took a picture and sent it to Isabel.

[Eren]: Izzy, u definitely failed to mention that ur brother is a God of Calamity.

She responded almost immediately even though she was at work.

[Izzy]: Lol. I guess you saw huh?(^Ｏ^)

[Eren]: Yeah I did. (¬‿¬) And it will never be unseen that’s for sure!

[Izzy]: Hahaha I guess you get to be [Yukine](http://www.behindthevoiceactors.com/tv-shows/Noragami/Yukine/) then.

[Eren]: Why thank you. I’m flattered. I personally think that I could be a very badass sword.

[Eren]: Though watching Soul Eater I always figured I would be a miser…¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ …we can all make adjustments though.

[Izzy]: Glad to hear it! ;)

Levi turned off the vacuum cleaner suddenly and walked swiftly out of the room while I stared after him in confusion.

[Eren]: gtg. You should probably get back to work too ;)

[Izzy]: you ass :p

Levi returned promptly holding my clothes from yesterday folded in his arms.

“Here. You can take a shower if you want.”

“Oh. Umm thanks!” Wow. He had even washed my clothes for me…

“Wait, Levi!”

“What brat?”

“Well ummm, if you need any help cleaning… I uhh could help you and I could shower after we’re done.”

“It’s noon and I should probably get you the fuck home before Mikasa goes bat shit crazy.”

“I already talked to her. She stayed the night at Annie’s and I think she’s gonna hang there for the rest of the day.”

“Well aren’t you two similar.”

“Uhhh not quite… it’s not like Mikasa got drunk…and for her, umm, her and Annie are super uhhh  _close_.”

He cocked an eyebrow.

“Sooooo cleaning! How ‘bout it?”

“I don’t think you can meet my standards for cleaning, brat.”

That really got me.

“Oh yeah?!” I yelled rolling up my sleeves. “Gimme a room and it’ll be sparkling the next time you walk in!”

He snorted. “Sure brat. Sure. Can you even handle the sound of a vacuum cleaner right now?”

“Are you kidding? I could even handle Hanji right now.”

“God, you don’t have to go that far.” He grimaced.

Still, this seemed to convince him that I was, in fact, okay and in perfect working condition. I headed into the room with the piano in it; any dust in this room was going to feel my wrath.

And so began a lovely afternoon of cleaning. After I had finished the music room I helped Levi finish up the kitchen and then we moved upstairs to clean the bedroom.

“Oi, help me make the bed.”

“Your wish has been heard loud and clear!”

He rolled his eyes.  “Stop that.”

“What?”

“You know exactly what. I may not know what you’re quoting, but I still know it’s some kind of anime joke.”

“Aww, you know me so well.” I grinned. “I guess senpai really has noticed me!”

He rolled his eyes at me again before glancing at the clock instead of responding.

“It’s a little after three, so Isabel and Farlan will be home soon. Why don’t you shower now?”

“Are we done?”

He nodded.

“So uhhh, I know this is your room and we just cleaned the shower, so should I use the other on—”

“Here is fine.”

“Oh uhh okay.”

I grabbed my clothes and headed for the bathroom and Levi walked out of the room.

Unfortunately, I don’t really think ahead that much so, when I realized that this shampoo and body wash was the same stuff that Levi uses on himself every day, I almost fainted. I may have spent a few minutes just inhaling the smell of his body wash because it was just so…Levi.

Okay Eren, stop being a creep and thinking about Levi in the shower.

No, I wasn’t actually thinking about Levi showering! I was just…Levi…showering…

NO!!! DON’T THINK ABOUT IT! DON’T THINK ABOUT IT!

QUICK!

Uhhhhh Old ladies! _Ugly_ Old Ladies! Mikasa as an old lady! Uhhhh JEAN as an old lady!

That did it. The image of Jean as an ugly old lady with froofy white hair and gross red lipstick had me banging my fist against the shower wall laughing. And incredibly turned off.

I finished up as quickly as I could and then noticed that I didn’t set aside a towel for myself. Great.

So here I was awkwardly looking for a towel while getting water _all_ over the floor.

It’s no wonder that I didn’t hear the yelling until I was fully dressed and making my way downstairs.

I had instinctively started searching for Levi as soon as I reached the bottom. Unfortunately, he was very easy to find because of the raised voices. He and Isabel stood in the family room sharing what sounded like some very pointed words. See, they only _sounded_ like pointed words because I had _no_ _fucking clue_ what in the name of Stein’s Gate they were saying. Like seriously. That shit was definitely _not_ English.

And whatever it was, things were getting heated up really fast. Levi looked like he was about to take down a wall by sheer intimidation and Isabel looked like she was ready to set both of them on fire with her face.

.

I had no idea what to do.

Normally if I walked in on a fight I’d pick a side and defend them ‘til the death…but…I couldn’t really do that here. I really wanted to defend Isabel because she’s my friend, but at the same time, I couldn’t wholeheartedly say that she was in the right. And I hadn’t ever seen Levi this upset. Sure, I’d seen him pissed off and about to deck me in the face, but this was someone that he loved, not some bratty-ass kid that he had bumped into once before. There’s no way that Levi would be this enraged for just anything.

The fact that I couldn’t understand a word they were saying didn’t help any either. Actually, I did notice a few ‘fuck’s here and there and some other English swear words, but it didn’t really help much.

So I stood there.

Rooted to the spot because I couldn’t figure out what to do.

I was still standing there when Farlan walked in.

His voice was calm but firm as it cut through the yelling. Both Isabel and Levi turned to look at him. Levi began to say something and gestured to Isabel, who immediately started defending herself, voice rising once again. Farlan cut them both off and spoke quickly. His tone held a surprising amount of authority and I wondered if he was used to breaking up fights between Isabel and Levi.

When Farlan was done speaking there was an eerie silence.

Isabel spoke in a shaky quiet voice, but it still held a measure of venom. “So you think it’s stupid too huh?” With that, she turned and walked out of the room.

I doubt that she even saw me there as she stormed past, heading towards the stairs.

As Levi and Farlan watched her go they both saw me. Levi’s eyes locked with mine and I held his gaze. When the sound of a door slamming above us sounded our gaze broke and he turned on his heel and left the room as well.

Farlan exhaled slowly and ran a hand over his face, which now looked absolutely exhausted.

“Sorry you had to see that, Eren.”

I waved him off. “Don’t be. You guys are family; it’s normal to fight. Mikasa and I have arguments all the time.”

He nodded.

“I don’t want to pry, but can I ask what that was about?” I shuffled nervously. “I couldn’t really understand what you guys were saying…”

“Basically Levi got overprotective and he yelled at Isabel for being stupid, but Isabel got really upset because she doesn’t think he’s valuing her desire to be independent and pursue what she wants to do. He refuses to acknowledge her actions as anything other than irresponsible.”

 The gears in my head were spinning wildly. “So what did you tell them?”

He sighed again. “I told Levi to stop being too overprotective and I told Isabel to stop being stupid and deciding things rashly.”

“Oh… so now they’re mad at you too?”

“Yeah.”

“Okay.” I turned and made my way towards the stairs.

“Wait Eren, where are you going?”

“To comfort Isabel.”

When I got to her room, I knocked and waited for an answer.

I didn’t get one so I knocked again only louder.

She yelled something in French that sounded like cass twah (trois? Like the number three? Isn’t it like un, deux, trois in French?) and then Farlan’s name. I assumed that she said something along the lines of “fuck off Farlan.”

“Izzy, it’s me. Eren. Open the door.”

I heard her make a surprised sound and then a soft, “it’s open,” followed.

I opened the door without hesitation and found her sitting on her bed, clutching a pillow in her lap, with a very large bag of M&Ms next to her. I shut the door behind me and went and sat down next to her.

“So why are you here?”

“Well, Levi let me sleep in and then I helped him clean. I was about to ask Levi to drive me home when I heard you guys yelling. I didn’t realize you guys were arguing sooner ‘cause I was in the shower.”

“Oh. That makes sense.”

“So what happened? Farlan gave me an overview, but no details.”

Her eyes were red and still watery. “Levi’s mad at me because I want to leave. Actually, I think he’s being so overprotective because he doesn’t know what to do if Faran and I both leave.”

“Wait you’re leaving? You’re _both_ leaving?”

“Yeah…Farlan got into med school and I got into a program in New York City for interior design.”

“Damn.”

“Yeah. It’s really competitive and I was so happy that I got in. I mean, this is what I’ve been working towards since I don’t even fucking know when. I’ve always wanted to be an interior designer. Even in grade school.”

I nodded. “I get it, but now I can see why Levi’s upset too. We’re talking New York City here. Not exactly the safest place for a twenty-year-old to be living alone.”

“I know. But it’s not like I don’t know how to be responsible. I’m more independent than he gives me credit for. Plus he should know better than anyone that when I have a goal to achieve, I’m the most determined person in the world. I would never waste this kind of opportunity.”

“I get it. But both of your brothers are right, even if you don’t want to hear it. Go to New York City, become the best fucking interior designer the world has ever seen, but don’t you dare do any of that without thinking it through first. New York isn’t your only option. There are a lot of different places that you can choose from.”

She nodded again. “I know. I know that, but I just... I just wanted him to hug me and tell me…” The tears starting rolling down her face and I pulled her into a hug as she continued to sob. “I just wanted him to tell me that he was proud of me and that he was happy for me because he knows this has been a dream of mine for so long. And then he just started getting mad at me and I never wanted him to be angry and it hurts so much that he wasn’t happy for me. Is that selfish? I’m being selfish, right?”

“That’s not selfish. You just wanted your brother to support you. That’s perfectly normal.”

We sat like that for a while. I rubbed circles on her back as she cried until she couldn’t anymore.

“Hey Eren?” She asked abruptly.

“What?”

“I wanna watch yaoi now.”

I couldn’t stop laughing, but sure enough, we pulled out her computer and watched ,[Kirepapa](http://myanimelist.net/anime/3375/Kirepapa) together while snacking on M&Ms.

When I left her room, she was pulling up more yaoi to watch again for probably the 5th time.

Alright. Now it was Levi’s turn.

As I scoured the house looking for the stupid guy, I thought about what Isabel had told me—specifically the part about her and Farlan both leaving. After taking care of them for so long and always being together, the idea of being left alone must be incredibly difficult.

I found him sitting at the piano, staring at the keys.

“Were you playing?” I hadn’t heard anything…

He shook his head. “I couldn’t decide what to play.” His voice sounded tired. “I’ll drive you home now.”

He stood up, but I shook my head.

“I’m not driving with you in this state. You’re not going to be thinking rationally because there’s a lot of things on your mind.”

He didn’t respond.

“Come talk to me.”

He didn’t move.

I groaned, but grabbed him and dragged him towards the couch like I always do. I sat down on the end and pulled him down right next to me instead of letting him sit on the other end.

“I’m angry brat. I don’t especially feel like talking.”

“You’re not angry. You’re sad.”

He looked at me, at a loss for words. I had caught him completely off guard.

“C’mon Heichou. Talk to me. You took care of me, consider this returning the favor if it helps.”

“You’re a dumbass. Who the fuck said I was sad? Shitty brat.” He muttered leaning on my shoulder. I smiled. I guess he was too emotionally drained to give a shit anymore.

But he pulled away abruptly, “Oi, why the fuck is your shoulder all wet?”

“Sorry, I guess shoulder’s a no-go.” I turned and held my arms out, indicating that he could lie on my chest instead. He was still staring at me in disgust though.

“Dear God! It’s wet because I let your sister cry on my shoulder. You made her really sad. Now shut up and tell me your feelings so I can make you feel better too!”

With that, I tugged him down and he crashed into my chest rather hard, which hurt, but I couldn’t bring myself to care. I wrapped my arms around him.

“Two-timer.”

“Nuh-uh! I watched [School Days](http://myanimelist.net/anime/2476/School_Days). That shit gets fucked up real fast.”

“Loser.” He said.

“Now talk, you idiot.”

He readjusted himself so that his back was against my chest as he sat in between my legs.

“I don’t even know what to say.”

“Just tell me why you were mad at Isabel.”

“Tch. You already know why.”

“But I want to hear it from you.”

He groaned. “I was fucking upset because she isn’t thinking through the decisions that she’s making.”

“And…”

“What the fuck do you mean “ _and”_! There is no “and”! That’s it.”

“Levi. You’re going to be lonely if her and Farlan both leave. Even if you’re not doing it on purpose, you don’t want her to leave yet.”

“That’s not tr-”

“You’ve always known that Farlan and Isabel wouldn’t be here forever, but you haven’t had time to mentally prepare yourself for Isabel to leave and you want her to be safe more than anything so you’re anxious about the idea of New York City.”

“…You’re a dumbass.”

“But I’m right?”

“…Somewhat…”

“So get it all out now.”

“I hate talking about my feelings.” I laughed.

“Oh well.”

And he talked.

~

“Turn right at the stop sign.”

He grunted in response.

“You know Levi, I was thinking.”

“Oh God.”

“Wow, that’s rude.”

He chuckled. “I know. I like making fun of you though.”

“Fine. Whatever. I was just going to say that you’ve gotten nicer, too.”

I was really glad that he had cheered up.

“Have not.” He said jokingly defensive.

I smiled and almost missed the next turn to give him.

“You used to be so mean to me. I wonder what happened to the Mr. Grumpy pants that threatened to shove a chef’s knife up my ass.”

He let a small smile stay on his face. “Yeah, I wonder.”

But then he scoffed. “And just so you know, I might still do it.”

“Would not.” I laughed.

“Yeah, keep telling yourself that brat. You might wake up with a surprise one morning.”

“Lately my mornings seem to be full of surprises,” I smiled broadly.

“Hmm. I bet.”

“I’m sure Levi Ackerman doesn’t make breakfast for everyone.”

“You’re damn right, you shitty brat. Get drunk on my couch again and I can’t promise I’ll be so nice.” He said sternly.

“Levi. Even if you were half as nice as you were last night and this morning, I would still call you a saint.”

“I’m definitely not a saint.” He said it softly. His eyes glued to the road.

“Levi, we all have flaws. Nobody’s perfect.”

I swear I heard him mutter something under his breath. It sounded like, “Coulda fooled me.” But I wasn’t sure what he would’ve meant by that.

~

“So Jaeger-bombastic decided to grace us with his presence.”

“Yeah, nice to see you too, horseface.”

“Yo man! It’s been a while.” Connie yelled from the couch.

Everyone was here. Sasha was squished next to Connie eating all the food, and Christa was next to them.

“Yeah it has. I’ve missed getting free food, that’s for sure.”

“You shoulda seen Christmas! Sure, a lot of you guys were missing, but we still had an awesome party.”

Mikasa and I usually went to Jean’s Christmas party. It was typically a lot smaller than most of his parties because a lot of people went home for the holidays, or at least spent Christmas with family. But for a lot of us, our friends really were our family. We all had different family situations and not all of them were good.

Annie arrived with Reiner and Berthold shortly after Mikasa and me.

They were soon cuddling on an armchair together. After the fiasco at Christmas, Annie had actually confessed to Mikasa. It was adorable. And Mikasa was probably the happiest girl in the whole wide world. See? [Girls can love girls](http://i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/facebook/000/678/979/667.jpg)! It’s not [Forbidden love](https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/H1ZA3s1YEX0SXCjJRBQWnZAcZMEko_nbnXorC9A6suz41Y1igLhQt4VJnyGtST540Rdgua3GtufKbvm2vMVbSndPMUEaoZfdz25Z1qzELloGyt50UearSNYazEHLLlxRZSe7lhRj)! (I crack myself up.)

We all gathered into the small living room, but no one cared that it was crowded. Ymir came back in from the kitchen and reclaimed her seat next to Christa.

“Hey Eren, didn’t you bring a date?” Jean joked.

I laughed. “I wasn’t aware I needed one.”

“Don’t listen to him, Eren! Everyone is just jealous of the single life.” Connie yelled.

Sasha cheered next to him.

“Although someone needs to drag Armin to one of these parties again. He’s been skipping all of them recently!”

“Well, in his defense, he and Erwin are really adorable,” I responded.

Connie scoffed. “Of course they are. What’s with all of you people anyway! First Christa gets a girlfriend, and then all of a sudden it’s an epidemic! Even _Jean_ got a boyfriend!”

“Hey, RUDE!” Jean yelled.

“Yeah, I’ve got to say, I really didn’t expect you to finally grow a pair and actually ask Marco out. It’s amazing that you didn’t stay single for the rest of your life.” I teased.

“Yeah, whatever Jaeger. You’re just jealous because I have someone to kiss at midnight!” He proved his point by grabbing Marco and kissing him right on the mouth.

“EW GROSS!” Connie and Sasha both yelled while Christa cheered.

“You’re so immature,” Ymir scoffed.

It was nice to be hanging out with my friends again.

“Wow Jean, that was totally a low blow,” Reiner said joining the conversation. “Not all of us can be lucky enough to have someone to kiss on New Years.”

I couldn’t stop myself from thinking of Levi. What would it be like to just grab him and kiss him? Or if it was midnight and he kissed me…it would be magical. And it sounds corny as fuck, but the idea still made my face heat up.

“I don’t know Reiner, it looks like there’s someone that Eren wishes he was kissin’.”

Sasha and Connie began making a series of “ooh” sounds and catcalls as I blushed even harder at Ymir’s comment.

“Ymir. I thought we were friends, God.”

She laughed.

“Hey, I only tease people if I like them, consider it a compliment.”

“Didn’t you guys just meet?” Jean asked confused.

“Nah. Friend of a friend,” Ymir explained.

Sasha and Connie were still cooing and yelling “Eren’s got a Cru-ush!”

“So Eren…who’s the lucky girl? Guy?”Ymir asked.

“It’s a guy.”

“Mikasa!!!”

“Ooh is he hot?”

She smirked, “Yeah, he’s not bad. Depends on your type, though, I guess. He’s a little short.”

I hid my face in my hands. This was so embarrassing.

“Oh. Hmmm short… Eh, there can be hot dudes that are still short.” Connie said.

“Oh Connie. Don’t you wish!”

“Hey, I’m sure that one day Connie’s gonna find someone great!” Marco interjected.

Everyone laughed. And Connie sputtered defensively.

“I hope it isn’t unrequited love! That would be so sad. Is it Eren?” Christa asked.

Mikasa shrugged, and then her smirk grew coy, “Well they did sleep together.”

“YOU’RE DEAD MIKASA!!!” And with that I tackled her. Everyone around us was still buzzing with the new information that they had just received.

Unfortunately for me, two against one wasn’t exactly a fair fight, so I only managed a few solid hits to the head with a pillow before Annie pulled it out of my hands and slapped me across the face with it.

As I sputtered back to my spot, the interrogation began.

“So? Is he good in bed or what? How are you two not together yet?”

I sighed. “We didn’t actually have sex, guys.”

“So… just some mild shit? We talkin’ blowjob? Hand job?”

I repeatedly shook my head. Mikasa still didn’t know that I was completely drunk that night and, at the moment, I still didn’t really feel like disclosing that information either.

“No. We literally just slept in the same bed. Like two tweens having a fucking sleepover, okay? Nothing happened.”

“How did you not pop a boner like that?”

“UGH! I don’t know! And I really don’t want to talk about it!”

At that, everyone laughed.

Suddenly Christa gasped. “So it IS unrequited!”

“Whaddayou mean, Christa?” Sasha asked around a mouth full of food.

“Well, his crush wouldn’t have willingly slept in the same bed as him without doing anything if he had romantic feelings for Eren, would he?”

She was answered by silence.

“Maybe the guy didn’t know that Eren’s gay. Or maybe he isn’t gay.”

I cleared my throat. “He’s bi. And he definitely knows I’m gay.”

“Oh well…at least you guys seem…close.”

“Uh…yeah.”

“So what? You got friend-zoned?” Reiner asked.

I snorted and crossed my arms. “More like little-brother-zoned, but I guess they’re both pretty bad.”

“Damn! I didn’t know you were into older guys Eren.” Jean yelled.

“He’s not _that_ old!”

“How big is the age gap?” Marco inquired.

I scratched my head. “Nine years…” I supplied softly.

Jean burst out laughing. “Not that old he said! Not _that_ old! Dude, you’re crushin’ on a thirty-year-old dude who thinks of you as his little brother, to the point where he’s okay sharing a bed with you! Your heart’s going to get smashed to pieces, my friend.”

“I know! Okay?!” I snapped. The room fell quiet. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to get upset.”

“No, I’m sorry man. I went too far. But you know what I mean.”

I nodded, my eyes glued to the floor in front of me. Kinda felt like shit, not gonna lie.

“So…how did you get little-brother-zoned, if you don’t mind us prying?” It was Marco again.

“You guys already know all the embarrassing shit at this point, so why the fuck not… He has a younger sister who’s our age. We’re friends. That’s how I met him. Well…kind of.”

At that, Ymir perked up.

“Eren…it wouldn’t happen to be…” She raised her eyebrows.

“Yeah, it is.”

“Oh.” She raised her hands in surrender. “You know what? I don’t even blame you. He’s a pretty cool dude. He is short, though.”

“You know him?” Mikasa asked.

“Yeah. I’m friends with his little sister too. That’s how I met Eren…actually you’re Mikasa right? It’s my first time meeting you, but I’m starting to connect all the dots. Yeah, she’s mentioned both of you a lot.”

Mikasa smiled happily at that.

“Wait, why does Ymir get to be the only one in on this?”

Ymir shrugged nonchalantly and ignored Sasha’s complaints.

Jean was the one who broke the silence. “Well it’s New Years, so why don’t we put the past behind us and start moving forward. We’re gonna make you forget all about your crush even if it’s only for tonight, Eren!”

Everyone cheered.

It really was a great time.

At some point, someone had busted out Karaoke and we all picked songs off YouTube and put them up on the TV through shit that Jean had hooked up. The winner of the Karaoke battle was definitely Ymir, though. Her winning number had been Melt by that blue haired chick from Vocaloid. Miku I think. ([***](http://didyouknoanime.tumblr.com/image/58633065056))

We all screamed ‘HAPPY NEW YEAR’ at the top of our lungs as soon as the ball dropped and there was more than one couple in the room that shared a kiss for the start of the year.

Before leaving, though, Jean pulled me aside.

“Hey man, I don’t want to jump down your throat or anything, but I wanted to apologize for being a dick earlier. I could tell right away that what I said really hurt you and I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for you to take it that badly.”

“It’s okay. No hard feelings.”

"You know, if you like this guy that much, maybe you should just ask him out.” He shrugged nonchalantly.

“Jean…I…” I didn’t know what to say.

“Eren, I’m not calling myself an expert or anything, but I know that I should have asked Marco out ages ago. And I don’t regret it because we’re together now, but if he had slipped away from me I don’t think I would have ever been able to forgive myself.”

“You really like Marco, huh?”

“Yeah, I do. And I think you should ask your crush out.”

“It’s just complicated because he’s my friend’s older brother…”

“Eren… just go for it man. If they’re your friend, I think that once you talked to them and get everything out, they’d be chill about it. Plus you’ll never know whether or not the guy likes you if you don’t try.”

“You think so?”

I couldn’t stop myself from getting hopeful.

“Yeah, I really do. I know you. You’ll regret it so much if you don’t try. And hey, if worse comes to worst and he tells you that he can’t see you romantically, call me up, and we can go get smashed. It’s on me.”

I smiled. “Thanks man. You really do know me well.”

He grinned too. “Just go for it.”

“I will.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anime
> 
> Noragami  
> The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya  
> Soul Eater  
> Stein's Gate  
> Kirepapa  
> School Days  
> Mahou shoujo Madoka Magica
> 
> -also a Vocaloid reference
> 
> (I added in a link to Yuki Kaji for Yukine, cuz he's the voice actor. Can you guess who else he voices? ;) *wiggles eyebrows)


	15. You Rich Bastards

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You Rich Bastards"-Haruhi (Ouran High School Host Club)
> 
> So Eren is completely prepared to confess to Levi. Not necessarily prepared for the outcome, but he knows that he has to try or he'll never forgive himself. The only problem is...when? Luckily for him, some events at Recon can help him out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello wonderful people. It's amazing that we've reached this point so soon. I think you all will be delighted with this chapter and I hope you have enjoyed how far Levi and Eren have come. Their story isn't quite done yet, but...¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ we'll see what happens.

 So there’s a saying that goes something like: “Easier said than done.”

Yeah, that summed up how I felt right now pretty nicely.

I had been completely full of determination—and for the most part I still was—but sadly, saying that I was going to confess to Levi was a hell of a lot easier than actually doing it. For one, we hadn’t seen each other in forever. Not since Christmas. (You know, that one time that I got super drunk at his house and he patted me on the back as I threw up in his toilet. Yep. Good times.)

It felt like forever, but to be honest it was barely a month—as Armin so kindly reminded me when I made an off-handed comment about it.

I had kept myself busy with school and work, as did Isabel and Farlan, so we didn’t really hang out that much. Which meant that I hadn't been going over to their house, which meant…I had no excuse to see Levi and talk to him. It wasn’t like I was gonna head over to Izzy’s house to celebrate Martin Luther King Jr. day with everyone.

I had just happened to meet Levi in the golden window of time that was surrounded by holidays and happy spirits. It had been a stroke of luck, but now that it was over I wasn’t really sure what to do.

I could always wait for Isabel to invite Mikasa and me over for a movie night, but [who the hell do you think I am?](https://38.media.tumblr.com/d41cdb429f4547ec0db5e49a63592f81/tumblr_mijq9lX1001s5pa4to1_500.gif) I didn’t want to wait that long dammit! I was wasting time here!

If Levi was okay with dating me then I was _definitely_ wasting time. And if he wasn’t, then I needed all the time I could get to either try and earn his affections or move the fuck on.

The worst part was that I would just tell Levi that I wanted to meet up with him somewhere or something, but I didn’t even have his phone number. That simple fact really nailed me like a punch to the gut. If we were close at all, I would have his number, right? I felt pathetic.

This was so frustrating and I didn’t know what to do. I was just about to call Armin and ask him for advice when Mikasa came to me with the solution.

“Hey, Eren…I know this is kind of sudden and I feel bad for springing this on you so suddenly, but would you be able to do me a huge favor?”

“Yeah sure, Mika. Shoot.”

“Would you be willing to go to a party next week as my date?”

“Wait, what?”

“Next week is Recon’s 40th Anniversary, so they’re throwing this huge-ass party. Everyone from the company is going to be there and we’re supposed to bring dates. Armin is going with Erwin, so I figured you wouldn’t mind going.” She cocked her head. “So, can you come?”

Wait…Levi was going to be there…

Holy Fuck! THIS WAS IT!!!

“Oh my god! yes Yes YES!!! Thank you Mikasa, you’re the best!!!”

I was practically jumping up and down grabbing her hands in-between mine.

“Somehow I don’t think you’re this excited to see Armin…”

I stopped and scratched my head. “Well actually…I really wanted to see Levi, but I couldn’t come up with a way how…”

She cuffed me on the back of the head. “You could’ve asked and I would have brought up movie night to Isabel and gotten it all planned. We don’t see each other too much anymore since I don’t work at the store, but humans made this magical device a few decades ago called a cell phone.”

I just smiled broadly at her as she lectured me.

But there was something off…

“As excited as I am to go…shouldn’t you be bringing your actual significant other? Why isn’t Annie going with you?”

“Well, I did actually bring the idea up to Annie, but I didn’twant to pressure her into going. She can be really shy about going to these kinds of parties, especially with her girlfriend. I know that she would come with me if I asked her too, but I also know that she wouldn’t enjoy herself at all.”

“Oh…that makes sense.”

She nodded. “Well, I’m glad that you can come with me!”

“Yeah. Thank you, Mika. I love you.”

“Yeah, yeah. Just make sure you don’t embarrass me,” she quipped mockingly, ruffling my hair.

“Wouldn’t dream of it.”

I couldn’t stop smiling

[Operation Start](http://s867.photobucket.com/user/BrinkofDelusion/media/Angel%20Beats/AngelBeats-3.png.html)!!!

~

I had lost Mikasa somewhere in the crowd. Hanji had whisked her off so that she could be introduced to a bunch of these rich important people. Hanji wanted everyone to meet her 'new beautiful assistant.’

It was the most stereotypical party I had ever been to.

Everyone was dressed sharply, the women in expensive dresses that swished around their feet as they sashayed through the crowd all the while holding onto the arm of a handsome business man in an equally attractive suit. People mingled and smiled at each other, almost all of them holding a glass of champagne or whatever the fuck in their hands. There was a dance floor and music playing. Like ballroom style shit…I couldn’t even dance…Fuck. So much for being skilled in the arts Eren.

At least I looked good.

Mika had helped me pick out what I wanted to wear and I did the same for her. She ended up choosing an elegant deep purple dress for the night, which I was able to catch glimpses of here and there at random intervals. But I didn’t bother going over to stand with her; I knew that it would probably be a better idea for her to finish meeting people with Hanji.

I was still trying to find Armin, though.

For some reason the idea of Erwin and his date being swarmed by people hadn’t crossed my mind until after I had stepped foot into the party. And then I realized how stupid I was.

I sighed.

At least I had found a good vantage point to scope out people from the crowd.

My original plan of confessing to Levi as soon as possible seemed to be deteriorating as well. Being the Art Director, I’d be shocked if he didn’t have people waiting to talk to him just like Hanji and Erwin.

 _Aw Fuck. I_ _’m never gonna get to him_.

Resorting to a movie night might be my only option at this rate.

All of a sudden, two girls who were standing relatively close to me caught my attention. They were staring at me and whispering back and forth to each other, smiling.

I groaned internally. Now I had to deal with these two girls. _What a drag_.

My mistake of acknowledging their presence seemed to give them the courage to approach me.

“Hi, I’m Hannah and this is Mina.” Mina giggled as Hannah gestured to her.

Dear Lord.

“We noticed that you weren’t with anyone and you were glancing at the dance floor,” I wasn’t, “so we thought that you might want some company.” Hannah raised her eyebrows at me.

But before I could even respond Mina quickly asked, "What's your name?”

I debated giving them a fake name, but I doubted that they would ever see me again anyway.

“It’s Eren. And I was actually looking for someone, so I decided to step out from the crowd. I haven’t had much luck, unfortunately.”

“Ooh! Maybe we can help you find them! Who is it?”

“Oh, umm Levi Ackerman.” Maybe I should have given them Armin’s name, but Levi’s had just slipped out. Mostly because I really wanted to see him.

The two girls gave me pitying look. For a second I was terrified that they were going to say that Levi hadn’t come. I felt my heart plummet. “Yeah, you and everyone else. We always try to talk to him, but he hardly talks to anyone. He’s nice if you do get the chance to and he’s really attractive, but he always gets hogged.” Mina had her arms crossed over her chest.

“He’s right over there, but you can see he’s got his little squad around him.” She pointed, and I saw Levi standing towards the back of the room with four people circled around him, listening to what he was saying.

“The weird looking one is Olou. Next to him is Gunther and the hunky blonde one is Eld.”

“So who’s the girl?” I kept my tone light and curious. She was the closest to Levi of the group. She had her arm wound through his and was smiling.

Could Levi have a girlfriend? Had I seriously fucked up?

But wait, wouldn’t he have brought her to spend Christmas or Thanksgiving with him? _C_ _’_ _mon Eren! Don_ _’t lose your way!_ (Hey, don’t judge me. Anime quotes can be both inspiring and reassuring at times.)

Hannah didn’t bother masking her bitterness. “Petra Ral. They both claim that they’re just friends, but she’s always doing that. The worst part is that everyone thinks she’s so nice and perfect. She really seems like that, but,” she dropped her voice to a whisper, “she has a dark side. If you cross her, it’ll be the last thing you ever do. She also doesn’t trust a lot of people. She’ll be nice to you, but it doesn’t mean that she actually likes you.”

Oh. Wow. That totally sounds like someone Levi would be friends with. I wonder why he had never mentioned her. I kinda like the idea of a pretty girl that’s nice, but is secretly a boss or you know, has standards for trust. I respect that. A lot. Cliché, but cool.

Well at least these two girls had helped me locate Levi. Now all I needed was to get rid of them and find a way to get Levi’s attention.

Hannah was still babbling things about Petra’s personality and people that she had screwed over because she didn’t like them. Honestly from the stories, it sounded like those people had every right to be fired. If they couldn’t do their work for shit, then why would they even be hired in the first place?

“Sorry, but I don’t think you’re going to get the chance to talk to Mr. Ackerman. You should dance instead!”

“Actually I apologize, but I’ll have to decline your offer. I really don’t dance and I’d like to see if I could have a word with Levi at some point.”

Luckily, these girls seemed to be able to identify a lost cause when they heard it. They settled for giving me a sad smile and shaking their heads before walking off.

I made my way through the crowd so that I was a little closer to Levi. Just so that I could see him and catch him if he was ever free of conversation, but not close enough that I would draw attention to myself. There was also a chance that Levi might notice me standing here.

Yep. That’s what this boiled down to. PLEASE NOTICE ME SENPAI!

Nope. Nothing.

My luck must have been absolutely horrible because not five minutes passed before another girl came up to me. This one was named Lauda and it took a little more persuasion to get her off my back.

As soon as I got her to go away, I sighed heavily, but stopped short when I felt someone staring at me. Expecting to see another random girl, I was surprised when my gaze met Levi’s. I couldn’t help but smile. Hah bitches, Senapi noticed me waaay faster then any of you.

I expected the small smile and head nod that he sent my way as acknowledgement. What I didn’t expect was for Levi to actually excuse himself from the group and start making his way over to where I stood, stunned. The people that he had left behind turned to follow his path, and four sets of eyes soon found me. I gave a small smile and a nod back to the group and did my best to convey my silent apology for taking Levi away. Petra gave me what I could only describe as an appraising look. She seemed satisfied after a few seconds and when Levi reached me and put an arm on my back to guide me away from prying eyes I caught her smile at me.

“That’s Petra. She’s going to have a field day with this.”

“With what?” I asked confused.

Levi looked at me and chuckled.

“You.”

“…oh…um…why?”

He scoffed but didn’t respond.

He stopped walking and gestured for me to stand next to him.

Our backs were to the wall and even though we were a little hidden, we still got strange looks from anyone who did notice us. Well, they gave _me_ strange looks.

Levi looked bored. He sighed and then looked at me.

“So Mikasa brought you along huh.”

It wasn’t a question. Just an observation.

“Who’d you bring?”

He laughed. “I wouldn’t resign anyone to this fate. These parties fucking suck. The only reason I’m here is because Erwin threatens me every fucking year.” With that, he cast a lazy glance at me. “You’re one unfortunate brat.”

I raised my hands up in surrender. “I don’t really mind these kinds of things that much. What I do hate is all the girls that try to come up to me and ask me to dance with them or talk about stupid shit.”

“Yeah, you and me both.” He scoffed and then paused. “Actually, I saw you talking to that one girl just before I came over. It looked like you were having trouble trying to get her to fuck off.”

“You saw that?”

He nodded “You’re too nice. You’d get eaten alive by these rich bastards.”

I couldn’t hold back my chuckle. He raised an eyebrow at me before sighing. “So brat, what did I remind you of this time?”

“There’s a girl in a show that gets a scholarship to this rich school. She joins a club and the guys there make fun of her because she’s a ‘commoner’. One of the things that she says repeatedly throughout the show is, ‘You rich bastards.’”

“Ah. I see.”

There was silence.

“Levi?”

“Hmm?”

“Don’t take this the wrong way, but why did you come talk to me? Doesn’t it look bad?”

“I can talk to whoever I damn well please. And right now I want to talk to you.”

My heart sped up. Actually, fuck speeding up, my heart _missed_ a beat.

“You’re smiling like an idiot.”

“Well duh. There’s this reflex where you smile when you’re happy.”

“You should probably get that checked out. I don’t think it’s normal.”

I turned to give him a grin and a roll of my eyes and noticed that he had a small smile on his face. This was the first time tonight that I had gotten a chance to really look at him. When I was watching him before I could tell he looked hot, but up close was a completely different story. It was definitely unfair how attractive he was.

And that’s when I noticed it.

His suit was complete with a burgundy tie and a matching pocket tissue.

“You’re wearing it,” I breathed.

  
He turned sharply to look at me. With a completely straight face, he met my eyes and asked, “What’s wrong with me wearing my favorite tie to a party?”

Everything stopped. My brain especially. The only thought I could muster was: Holy SHIT! He just said that the tie I had bought for him was his favorite one! My face was probably glowing from how elated I was.

“You look like you need to pass gas.” He smirked.

“You idiot. I’m really glad you like the tie. I can’t even use words to express how happy I am right now.”

“Good,” he said with a nod.

Had he wanted me to be happy? I smiled even more broadly at the thought. This guy was going to be the death of me.

“I’m a little surprised that you didn’t wear it with the shirt. I thought that they looked so good together. I’m a tiny bit disappointed,” I joked.

“You’re a dumbshit. That thing is my sleepwear.”

He was still smiling and I hadn’t noticed, but at some point, we had gotten closer.

I glanced at him coyly and raised an eyebrow, “I thought you didn’t wear shirts to bed?”

“That one’s an exception.”

Well, that was definitely not the answer I had been expecting from him.

“Unless you prefer me shirtless when we sleep together?” He purposely said it so that the woman walking past us at that moment turned rather abruptly to stare at us.

“Shhhhh!” I shoved my hands over his mouth. “Why would you say something like that?!” He clasped my hands in his and pulled them off of his mouth to reveal that he was laughing. Why was he so beautiful?

“You’re face is red. Is that a reflex for something too? I hope it doesn’t mean that you’re drunk again.”

“Shuddup, you tease me too much!” but he was definitely right. My face was probably the color of Erza’s hair right now… It wasn’t helping that he was still holding my hands in his.

I turned on my heel and started walking towards the door still holding one of his hands.

“Oi, weren’t you embarrassed about people giving us looks before? ‘Cause with you holding my hand they’re definitely giving us weird looks now.”

He was right, and it was embarrassing, but I couldn’t bring myself to care. His voice was right next to my ear and if anything it just made me walk faster. We used a side exit of the ballroom. Basically the closest one I could find. It opened up into a hallway that had a water fountain at one end and a sign for a bathroom around the corner. Random pictures littered the white walls. Other than that, the hall was empty. 

No people.

The door shut behind us. I walked a few paces down the hall away from said door and pulled him next to me.

“So, care to share what possessed you and made you want to leave the party? I’m not complaining, but I’m going to laugh at you if I think it's something stupid.”

Instead of responding I pulled him closer to me.

His voice was dramatically softer, “Eren?”

Before he could ask anything else, I framed his face with my hand and pulled him by that stupid tie that made me so happy. Without any other warning, I pressed my lips to his.

His lips were soft and warm and it felt like I might be caught in a dream.

Those were the only things that crossed my mind as I kissed him and then gently pulled away.

His eyes were wide and his mouth dropped.

My heart tightened as I silently prayed that he wasn’t mad at me. It wasn’t exactly how I had planned to confess to him, but I guess it gets the same point across, and now if he rejects my ass, at least I got to kiss him once.

I took it as a good sign that he hadn’t shoved me away. He hadn’t returned the kiss either, but whether that was from surprise or the lack of interest in kissing me, I didn’t know. Only he would be able to say.

I was staring at him waiting for a response as he lifted a hand to his head and rested the other on his hip. He looked confused.

“I don’t give a single fuck about why you wanted to leave the ballroom, but there had better be a good-ass reason for why you just kissed me.”

“I like you.”

It was simple, to the point…And the reason. He didn’t need some long superfluous reason for why I felt attracted to him and that he was more important to me than oxygen or whatever the fuck people say. I always liked the simple confessions better anyway.

“Wait, what?”

“I like you, Levi.” I want to kiss you and go on dates with you and cuddle on the sofa watching random movies. It was unsaid but definitely conveyed.

He was looking at me shell-shocked.

Oh joy.

His expression made me want to rip my heart out and throw it in a trash bin. Why had I ever thought that he would like me? I had been expecting some cheesy-ass scene where the girl confesses and then the guy tells her that he likes her too and everything is flowers and butterflies. Wake up Eren.

“I’m sorry. Please don’t feel bad about this, I understand. I knew there was a good chance that you didn’t see me romantically, but I still wanted to convey my feelings just so I could try. I don’t want anything to be awkward between us so if you’d like to forget that this ever happened, I’ll understand that too.”

I moved to walk around him and go back into the ballroom. I’d find Mikasa and tell her that I would be waiting in the car for her to finish. It had already been two hours and I doubted that she wanted to stay longer anyway. I needed to really spend some time by myself trying to figure out what to do next, but for right now, I jut wanted to get out of here.

I hadn’t even taken two steps when I felt a harsh grip on my arm that pulled me backward.

I was thrown against the wall as Levi grabbed both sides of my face and kissed me. It was my turn to be surprised, but I quickly wrapped my arms around him and pulled him closer to me.

He had complete control over the kiss and I couldn’t have been more happy to give it to him. As our mouths clashed together I could feel my entire body filling with heat. The feel of him against me was perfect, I loved being in his arms. Even though the kiss was much longer than our first, it still ended too soon. I sighed as Levi pulled away with a light bite to my lower lip.

He wove his fingers into my hair and pulled my face next to his so that his lips were now next to my ear.

“Don’t you dare say that,” he growled quietly.

It took my brain a second to even remember what the hell I had said. All I could think about was the lingering feeling of his lips on mine and the heat that had spread throughout my entire being like wildfire.

He pulled back and touched our foreheads together. “And don’t you dare go making that awful face. I never want to see you look so sad again. It rips me to pieces.”

“Levi.” I breathed his name. I could feel everywhere that we were touching. Our foreheads, my hand fisted into his shirt, the other arm wrapped around him, and his hands in my hair and caressing my face.

“You shithead.” His voice was soft and gentle, “How could you think that I didn’t like you?”

“I still don’t really believe that all of this is real. I keep thinking that I’ll wake up at some point and realize it was all just an amazing dream.” I held him tighter. “I really don’t want to wake up.” Because every dream has an end…no matter how nice the dream might be.([x](http://myanimelist.net/anime/1530/Kanon_\(2006\))) So please don’t let this be a dream.

He sighed, “Eren. I dare you to tell me that _this_ is fake.”

With that, he captured my lips again. But this time there was even more passion behind it. I greedily kissed him back, unable to get enough. His tongue flicked across my lips and I gasped happily. And then our tongues were dancing together. He had the faint taste of alcohol.

I couldn’t stop the small noises that rose up in the back of my throat.

All of my senses were on overload. I couldn’t stop kissing him. He tasted so good. I was surrounded by his scent too and it was driving me insane. Every time I gasped for air or inhaled through my nose, I was completely filled with the sensation of Levi surrounding me.

“Eren.” He murmured my name against my lips and then returned to kissing them. “I’m crazy for you.”

“Mmmm say it again.” I couldn’t pull him close enough.

He was trailing kisses down my jaw towards my neck and his breath ghosted across my skin every time he spoke. It made me tremble.

“I like you.”

“Again.”

He chuckled but continued to humor me.

“I like you Eren. I really like you. You make me crazy.” The last part came out in that throaty growl that I love so much. It was so sexy.

“Do you believe me now, you shitty brat?” He said biting and pulling on my earlobe.

“Yes. Definitely yes.” I was panting and my lips were probably swollen.

(What I didn’t realize until the next morning was that even if I thought this had all been a dream when I woke up, Levi had left some rather visible proof. Having your older sister point out the fact that you have hickeys on your neck is just as awkward as it sounds.)

“Eren—I think this is pretty obvious now—but God knowing you if I don’t say it straight, you’re going to freak out on me.” He gave me a look that said, ‘I dare you to deny it’. I raised my hands up defensively. He grabbed them with his own and kissed each of them.

“Eren, go out with me.”

“Wait, Levi! None of this was about going out! When I said I liked you, I meant as a friend.” I made my voice sound panicked, but ruined the effect when I laughed.

“Not funny brat. Not funny.” He muttered pecking my lips.

I smiled at him.

“Actually, I was more afraid that you saw me as a little kid than you seeing me only as a friend.”

He delivered a flick to my forehead.

“Ouchie! Leeevviiii.”

“Idiot.” He hugged me.

I felt so content right now. Wrapped in his arms. Even though this suit was kinda awkward for hugging… it would probably feel better in a T-shirt.

“It’s a perfectly valid concern.”

“Yeah, I guess. There is an age gap, but I don’t care about that. You’re perfect Eren.”

If my face wasn’t already flushed from everything else, it would definitely be red now.

“Are you sure?” I asked incredulously.

He nodded with a small grin.

“But…but…I’m always quoting anime…”

He only responded by kissing my cheek.

“And I’m kind of a loser.” He kissed my temple.

“And… I act really dumb when I get drunk.” He kissed my forehead.

“…I get really carried away with things.” He kissed the tip of my nose.

He paused hovering in front of my lips. “Anything else?”

I searched my brain desperately trying to find another flaw. It didn’t help that my mind was shorting out and it was very difficult to think about myself when the only thing in my head was: Levi Levi Levi Levi.

“I read fanfiction.” He laughed and then kissed me on the lips.

“But seriously, Levi,” I held his face with both of my hands. “I’m going to quote anime shit and probably make you watch stuff with me and constantly call you to talk about my favorite shows. And I’m going to make you cuddle with me all the time too.”

He smiled at me. A brilliant, sincere smile.

“That sounds amazing.”

My face exploded into a mass of color and there was definitely steam coming out of my ears too.

“B-but I thought you hated anime!”

“I never said I hate it, I just said that you were a loser.”

“I distinctly remember you saying that anime was crap,” I huffed.

“Well, maybe you can change my mind.”

He knew just what to say to get me to shut up. And to blush, but that much I’d known for a while.

“Levi, I want your phone number.”

“I bet.” We exchanged phones and I finally got ahold of his contact info. But before pressing the save button when he handed it back to me, I switched his name to ‘Sexy Heichou’. I smiled at my phone and turned it off before he could see it.

“You just did something fucking stupid didn’t you?”

“Believe it.”

He rolled his eyes.

~

**Hanji POV**

“Hey Mikasa, have you seen Levi?”

The short little bastard had disappeared on me. If he left the party just like that I wouldn’t be surprised, but it was kind of uncalled for. He almost always stuck around for at least two hours before calling it quits. Yet he had disappeared. At first, I thought that it was just to the bathroom or something, but unless he had cleaned the whole damn thing before using it, the time span that he had been gone didn’t make any sense. Unless…

“Um…actually I think he’ll be back soon, but if I could, I’d ask you to not go looking for him.”

I looked her over carefully. She had a glint in her eyes that told me she had a very good idea of where Levi had gone and I was beginning to grasp the situation as well.

Everything clicked into place. She had mentioned having a girlfriend and I had told her to bring her date to the party. I had assured her that everyone brought a date with the usual exception of a certain short grump with black hair and a few others.

Yet instead of showing up with her girlfriend, she brought her little brother.

I smiled at her.

Eren. You have a sister who loves you very much. I think this puts Levi in Mikasa’s debt as well. That is if everything went according to plan.

“Well then,” I clapped my hands together. “I think I want some alcohol to celebrate.”

“Celebrate…? Hanji, we’ve been celebrating all night,” Moblit pondered, confused.

“[La vie est drôle.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KBBtetiLZXE)”

I’d fill him in later, but for now—with all these people eavesdropping at the mention of Levi’s name—I waved it off and gave him a look. He nodded in response to show his understanding.

“That’s something Eren likes to say,” Mikasa said, happily walking alongside me as I moved through the crowd.

“Is it? How interesting.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anime!
> 
> Gurren Lagann  
> Soul Eater  
> Angel Beats  
> Naruto  
> Kill La Kill  
> Ouran High School Host Club  
> Fairy Tale  
> Kanon  
> (Naruto)  
> (Kill la kill)
> 
> Every anime ever/ Every Shoujo Anime ever


	16. A Sweet Dream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I'll Also Show You a Sweet Dream Next Night" -Vampire Night
> 
> Levi and Eren officially get together, dating and fluff ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *sigh FINALLY thank the good lord. My internet has been absolute shit for days. And no internet means no AO3 (ू˃̣̣̣̣̣̣o˂̣̣̣̣̣̣ ू)⁼³₌₃  
> Okay at this point we really are finishing this up so I'm going all out with the references.(And the cuddles ˚‧*♡ॢ˃̶̤̀◡˂̶̤́♡ॢ*‧˚ )
> 
> Enjoy!

“And who the fuck names a train, ‘The Flying Pussyfoot’?” ([v](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MYTbmdLmZZg)) Levi asked, marching into the room holding a bowl of popcorn.

I shrugged with a smile. “That’s just what it’s called. Don't ask me what it means, though....Actually my computer’s right there. Just look it up.”

He grumbled, but sat down next to me on the couch and grabbed my laptop, booting it up.

“What’s your password?”

“It’s El Psy Congroo. No spaces.”

I expected the scoff that Levi gave me.

“Hey, you know what it is. What does that say about you?” I wiggled my eyebrows at him.

“I do not. I just went along with it.”

“Uh huh. Then how did you know how to spell it?”

“Shithead. It’s Latin; I guessed.” He replied briskly.

I held up two fingers. “One, it’s actually a mixture of Latin and Greek. And two, even though ‘Congroo’ is spelled with a ‘C’ in the anime, it’s spelled with a ‘K’ in the official English translation of the visual novel, so you couldn’t have known that I would spell it with a ‘C’ unless you’d watched Stein’s Gate.”

He was staring at me flabbergasted. He suddenly split into a wide grin and pulled me closer.

“You are such a loser. Who even knows that kinda shit?” He pecked me lightly on the lips.

“I looked up what it meant.” I smirked.

“And what does it mean?” He hummed, his forehead against mine.

“Something along the lines of ‘To Harden the Mind.’”

“Interesting.”

Slowly pulling away, he returned to the task at hand and pulled up a Google page.

“Etymology:” He read out loud, “ _Flying_ is a slang term that could mean majestic or successful. Being a new transcontinental locomotive, this is fitting. _Pussyfoot_ is another slang term that means, ‘to walk or go on carefully’. Since the train was new, it is also fitting that the name is faring the passengers and crew well and telling them to have a safe trip…” He turned to me with raised eyebrows. “Flying is slang for majestic? And what the fuck is with pussyfoot meaning to be careful?”

“Hey, I’m _always_ careful around pussy.”

“Not funny, shithead,” he said punching me playfully in the arm.

“In all seriousness though, is this actually a thing? English is so weird!”

“Don’t look at me, English is my second language too.”

We both looked at each other completely stumped.

“Well you’ve been living in America way longer than I have…have you ever heard someone use the word ‘pussyfoot’?”

“Uhhh…No…” I scratched my head “We could ask Armin...?”

He shrugged.

I pulled out my phone and held down the speed dial for Armin.

“Hey Eren, what’s up?”

“Hi Armin. I have a question about an English expression.”

“Okay. Go for it.”

“What does ‘pussyfoot’ mean?”

I heard [choking and gagging](https://24.media.tumblr.com/55d113255b47bea0bedcacd3322a0d1b/tumblr_my70h9YPhW1sivapqo1_500.gif) on the other end of the phone followed by incoherent sputtering.([x](http://myanimelist.net/anime/10721/Mawaru_Penguindrum))

I covered the speaker of the phone and looked at Levi, “you know Levi, I don’t think he knows.”

Levi was shaking his head and laughing. God, he had a really contagious smile.

“Eren! What on Earth is wrong with you?!? How could you say that?”

“Well the name of the train in ‘Baccano’ is the ‘Flying Pussyfoot,’ and according to the website, ‘pussyfoot’ is a slang turn for being cautious. Levi and I have never heard of it and we weren’t sure if it was bogus or if it was because we just weren’t familiar with the expression.”

I heard him let out a long sigh, “You just made me spill coffee al over myself. Why couldn’t you just look it up on Urban dictionary?”

“Well, I’d rather ask a real person… Plus Urban Dictionary isn’t always applicable…Oops…”

“Eren. I’m going to hang up now and pretend like this conversation never happened.”

“Okay, bye.”

“Bye.”

With that, the line went dead. I ended the call and slipped my phone back into my pocket.

Levi leaned over and kissed me on the cheek.

“You’re wonderful.”

I beamed back at him as I pulled my computer towards me.

“Actually I wanted to show this to you before you started watching anime, but I think you’ll like it better since you know some of the characters now.”

The [AMV](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kH8qIKgg6tU&list=PLCyUbTo4zZ9ok-bMeEWTA3o0yQYeHtZ_t&index=37) started playing and I rested my head on his shoulder as he followed along with the text in the video.

“So who’s the guy playing chess with Light Yagami?”

“That’s Lelouch.”

“That sounds like a stupid name.”

I groaned, “Why does everyone say that?”

“Because his name literally means, ‘The Shady.’ It’s French. Well it means shady in one sense. If you say La Louche then it sounds like you’re talking about a ladle. Or the verb loucher could be conjugated to be louche, which is the verb to squint. It really depends on context.”

“Oh.” I was silent for a moment. “Usually people just laugh because Lelouch sounds like douche.”

He shook his head. “Sorry for the mini French lesson.”

“Don’t be. It’s really cool. So basically it depends if you mean the word as an adjective, noun or a verb?”

“Exactly.”

I nodded in understanding.

“Oh…hey Levi, I’m actually going to stop the video here ‘cause there’s a spoiler that I don’t want you to see.”

“Okay. But question.”

“What?”

“Is Lelouch just as crazy as Light Yagami was?”

“Eh. Kinda. They’re all crazy in their own way, though I like Lelouch way better if it helps.”

“What the fuck is up with all these crazy people?”

“Oh Levi. I can’t wait until you watch [Mirai Nikki](http://myanimelist.net/anime/10620/Mirai_Nikki_\(TV\)) and see [Yuno Gasai](http://f.ptcdn.info/383/025/000/1415529580-500pxYunoY-o.jpg). Although speaking of Yuno, I should have done this ages ago.” I snatched the laptop back and pulled up a Dere quiz.

“Here. You have to answer all of these questions honestly.”

“What is it?” he asked skeptically.

“A Dere test.”

“A what?”

“It categorizes your personality.”

He read one of the questions warily and then looked at me like I was insane. “What the fuck?”

“I’m trying to make sure you’re not a Yandere!!!”

“And what does that mean?”

I edged closer to him and whispered, “It means that you’re craaaazzzzzyyyy.”

“You think I might be a crazy bitch?” He raised an eyebrow.

“Well you’re super hot so it’s totally possible.”

He stared at me. With a sigh he took the computer, “The things I have to do.”

Surprisingly, he turned to the screen and filled out all the questions.

“Here. Done.”

I looked at the results. “Kuudere…” I read out loud. “’You’re cynical and you don’t express yourself well’… wow. I didn’t think that these things could be so accurate.” I smiled at him.

(The website kept going with: _Some examples are:[Kanade](http://www.animemay.com/thumbnails/detail/20121111/angel%20beats%20tachibana%20kanade%201680x1050%20wallpaper_www.animemay.com_23.jpg)\- Angel Beats, [Rei](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/5/53/Rei_Ayanami.jpg)\- [Neon Genisis Evengelion](http://myanimelist.net/anime/30/Neon_Genesis_Evangelion), [Sesshomaru](https://secure.static.tumblr.com/7e45949c38d93761897172a879fb793b/jiiotuk/lVjn5hk65/tumblr_static_2oqx6bhx3484gcgkwg8c44k0_640_v2.jpg) \- [Inuyasha](http://myanimelist.net/anime/249/InuYasha), [Origami Tobbiichi](http://vignette1.wikia.nocookie.net/p__/images/8/89/Origami-_School_Uniform.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20150416194654&path-prefix=protagonist) \- [Date a Live](http://myanimelist.net/anime/15583/Date_A_Live), and [Carla](http://www.nautiljon.com/images/perso/00/15/charles_7451.jpg) \- Fairy Tale. _ But I didn’t bother reading them out loud since I doubted that Levi would know any of them yet. And wow. Why the hell do so many kuuderes have white hair?)

“Shitty brat.”

“Mmhm. Deny it.”

He was silent.

“Yep, thought so.” This time it was my turn to place a kiss happily on his cheek. He tried to hide the smile that formed on his face as a result, but was having more trouble with it than usual.

“I think I’m starting to break you out of your shell though,” I whispered in his ear.

“I think you might be right,” he sighed, putting the computer to sleep and setting it on the coffee table.

            

He tossed me the remote so I could pull up ‘Noragami’ on Netflix.

“Snuggle time!” I yelled, pulling up the first episode. He chuckled softly but opened his arms for me. We found a comfortable position and watched the show.

Levi was silent for the most part. That is until we got to one of Yato’s cleaning scenes and all the puzzle pieces clicked into place.

“Holy fuck. You little shit, THAT’S what I reminded you of?”

“Not _What,_ Levi. Who.”

“That?” He yelled pointing at the screen just as Yato did his [signature troll face](http://img00.deviantart.net/3078/i/2014/089/f/f/yato_cat_face_by_jayin1999-d7c9v7h.png).

Not helping Yato. Not helping.

“Don’t worry. I was talking about his serious side. And the way he cleans. He’s a total badass too. Plus he’s hot… See the parallels?”

“Yes. Fantastic. I feel much better now,” he deadpanned.

“Oh c'mon, Levi. Besides. Look at that dopey grin. You two are practically twins.”

His jaw dropped and he glowered at me betrayed. “My grin is _not_ DOPEY!”

He began poking me in the sides and tickling me ruthlessly.

“No stop. Mercy. Mercy!”

“You know, in French that just means ‘thank you,’ brat,” he said laughing next to my ear.

“Ah stop, please! I’m begging you here!” He finally relented, still laughing and I sagged against him.

“Asshole.”

“That was deserved.” He smiled. “ And now all those times that you called me ‘hot’ all feel so meaningless”, he teased.

I groaned. “But Leevi! I never call you ‘hot,’ I always call you ‘sexy.’ It’s like you don’t pay attention when I talk,” I whined at him.

He chuckled and our eyes met.

“Hmm. I guess now you just have to be careful not to call any anime guys ‘sexy’. I don’t wanna feel like I’m competing with a two-dimensional character for my boyfriend’s affections.”

“And now I have to show you ‘[The World Only God Knows](http://myanimelist.net/anime/8525/Kami_nomi_zo_Shiru_Sekai)’ or that ‘[Pet Girl of Sakura-thing](http://myanimelist.net/anime/13759/Sakurasou_no_Pet_na_Kanojo)’ just for those dudes that love 2D girls.”

“Oh God.” He said with a worried expression.

“Yep. You’re gonna hate it.”

He buried his face into the base of my neck and groaned loudly as I laughed.

“I can’t wait to show you ‘Hunter X Hunter’ so that you can see Feitan.”

“Shitty brat.”

We passed the rest of the evening just like that: lying on each other on the couch, occasionally shifting when our legs fell asleep.

“Alright, I’m gonna head out,” Levi stated, standing up and stretching as the ending theme for the last episode played.

I followed behind him as he walked towards the door. I slumped against the wall as he paused to put on his boots.

“You could just stay,” I said softly, internally cursing myself for being _that_ person. _Why am I so whiny? Stop being so clingy Eren!_

He stopped in his tracks and looked back up at me. “Eren. You know I can’t.”

“I know,” I whispered staring at the floor. He probably had work in the morning and I was lucky that he came over today at all. But every time we were together I never wanted to leave. Or for him to. No matter how many hours we spent in each other’s company, I never grew tired of talking to Levi. Or even if we didn’t talk, just leaning against him quietly as we watched random anime.  He had actually liked Death Note and some of the others.

 He walked over to me and lifted my chin slightly so he could meet my eyes.

“You can still give me a goodnight kiss, though,” he said with a cocky smirked.

“You’re an ass.” 

His arms tightened around me as I slid mine around his neck and he pulled me into a deep kiss.

~

“I got a call from Dad last night,” Mikasa said, walking into the room.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, he seems to be doing pretty well. I think he’s happy where he is.”

“I’m glad.”

Mikasa nodded in agreement.

“He’s pretty impressive though. Hasn’t missed a birthday to date.”

She smiled. “He even remembered how old I was turning, unlike someone.” She cast her eyes accusingly at me.

“Hey, I forget how old _I_ am sometimes, I’m sorry.”

She laughed. Because it’s absolutely true.

We sat in silence for a little bit.

“Are you going out on Valentine’s Day?”

She rolled her eyes. “Don’t worry. You and Levi can have the apartment to yourselves, I’m going to Annie’s. Just try not to disturb the neighbors too much.”

“I think I’m more concerned about Annie’s neighbors.”

She scoffed. “Whatever. At least I’m getting some.” She stuck her tongue out at me and darted from the room.

“In the name of the moon, I shall punish you!!!” I yelled running after her, brandishing a fake flower I had snatched from a vase.

Unfortunately, there isn’t much that a flower can do against a door, so I was forced to admit defeat when she ran into her room.

I grabbed the TV remote and sprawled on the couch instead. Switching on the television I aimlessly flipped through channels without any real interest in what was flashing across the screen.

What Mikasa had said was true. Levi and I hadn’t had sex yet and there was a very slim chance that we were going to on Valentine’s Day. It wasn’t because we weren’t attracted to each other; we just both wanted to take things a little slower. We didn’t want to mess things up by going to fast and getting in over our heads.

But nonetheless, it was frightening how rapidly I was falling for him.

Sure I’d _liked_ him in a romantic way for some time now, but even in my past relationships, it just hadn’t felt like this.

I was falling in love with Levi more and more every time we saw each other and I wasn’t sure how I felt about it. I didn’t want to cross the border between ‘dating’ and ‘I love you’ just yet.

~

“[Kirito](http://static.comicvine.com/uploads/original/11111/111111435/3271669-0556558219-Kirit.png) is too overpowered. And he needs to stop wearing black because he thinks it makes him look like a badass.” Levi scowled.

“I feel like there’s something personal in that statement,” I smirked resting my elbows on the counter in front of me as Levi leaned on the other side frowning.

“Don’t worry Levi. I think that you look much sexier in black than Kirito ever will.”

“Suuuuuuck up!” Isabel yelled with her hands cupped around her mouth.

I turned and spat my tongue out at her, “Isabel stop ruining this for me. I could have totally gotten some action for that and now it’s gone.”

She laughed and then looked at me with a mischievous glint in her eyes. “Oh trust me Eren, I’m sure all you’ll have to do is give Levi a sultry look and he’ll be on you all ‘[meelloorine!!!](http://i3.ytimg.com/vi/JmndcSPEqjg/mqdefault.jpg)’”

I swatted my hand at her, but she spun away going around the other side of the counter so that I couldn’t reach her.

Leaning back, she turned her gaze towards Levi this time. “Don’t worry Eren, you aren’t the only one all worked up. From what I’ve heard via Hanji, Levi’s been really happy at work lately.”

“You!” Levi jumped towards her and she squealed loudly. The two ran in circles around the island with Isabel yelling, “’Would you like to see my boyfriend? I have some pictures right here!’”

He caught her quickly and immediately began poking her in the sides.

“No. Stop.” She shrieked laughing hysterically. “Stop. No. It’s not fair. Ow.” But the laughter continued to bubble out as he continued jabbing and tickling her.

I curled my arms around him and tugged. “C’mon Levi. This land is made of Love and Peace. So let her live.”

Isabel didn’t need any more opportunity and yanked herself away from Levi’s grasp. “I’m in so much pain, Leeevvviiii.” She whined clutching her sides. “What if I had died?!” She exclaimed dramatically.

“You’re fine.”

She humphed.

The pity party she was about to throw herself was interrupted by the sound of the doorbell.

Rushing to get it, she left Levi and me alone in the kitchen.

“I’m glad you guys made up.”

He shrugged.

“Yeah, we sorted things out. She’s actually taking her time planning everything and I’m trying to loosen up a bit.” He cast his eyes to the floor.

“Levi.” I wrapped my arms around him. “You never have to pretend in front of me.”

He wordlessly returned the embrace and that was all I wanted.

“Oooh. Cute.” I heard behind me.

Ymir stood there with a hand cocked on her hip. “Fancy seeing you here,” I smirked at her. She shrugged nonchalantly.

“I figured since I was here, it would be good to wish you a ‘Happy Birthday’.”

“Thank you.” I beamed.

Isabel ran in, purse in hand. “Hey Levi, I’m leaving.”

“Yeah, yeah, drive carefully.”

“Of course. Be sure to make Eren’s special day…uhh… _special_.” She winked. He rolled his eyes. “Your wish has been heard loud and clear.”

Isabel and I both stared at him stunned. “Levi, did you just…”

“What?” He growled. Daring us.

“Oh my God…Eren.” Our eyes met and she nodded, “he’s ready.” We turned and looked at Levi, quietly assessing how far he had come.

As Isabel and Ymir headed off to girls’ night, I grabbed Levi and pulled him towards the family room.

“Ready for what? What was that about?”

I didn’t answer.

He stood in front of the couch with his arms crossed as I grabbed the remotes.

“Oi brat, ready for what?!”

I looked at him and smirked.

“You, my dear Levi, are ready for FullMetal Alchemist Brotherhood.”

~

“Hey Eren?”

“Nnn?” I turned my head so I could see his face.

“Let’s stop here for tonight.”

“Mmm okay.” He shifted out from behind and got to his feet, graceful as always.

He extended his hands toward me and I gratefully accepted them. Pulling me to my feet he took my hands and raised them to his lips. He raised his eyes up to meet mine as he kissed each one and then whispered, “Close your eyes.”

“Okay.” I smiled doing as he had instructed.

[Kimi no Todoke](http://myanimelist.net/anime/6045/Kimi_ni_Todoke)?

But aren’t I supposed to grab the back of his shirt and then close my eyes or some shit? ([x](https://40.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ltij0jcJXE1r1h6bko2_500.jpg))

Then again we’re not exactly blushy virgins sharing their first kiss so…I think that idea’s null and void.

Taking my hands in his, he began slowly leading me forward.

Oh. Disney style.

I was almost positive that we were headed to the kitchen. Almost. When we stopped moving I heard Levi shuffling around and moving things.

My entire world suddenly lurched forward and I yelped loudly, my eyes flying open. “Levi!” THEY DON’T DO THIS IN DISNEY!

Luckily warmth, and not the cold hard floor, enveloped me. Levi was sitting at the counter and I was now sprawled across his lap. Everything was dark except for two candles on opposite sides of the counter and a single one protruding out of a small cake right in front of me. It was the perfect size for two people.

He was smiling at me with an arm around my waist, holding me close.

 “You know, you could have told me to open my eyes first like a normal person,” I said, but I couldn’t muster anything more than a slight displeasure in my tone.

“But then I wouldn’t have gotten to hear you scream my name,” he smirked.

“Ass.” I shoved his shoulder playfully.

He laughed. “Exactly. Very good.”

I rolled my eyes. “Sooo… What is all of this anyway?” I asked innocently, my eyebrows knit together in confusion.

“Idiot.” He breathed, leaning in closer. I kissed him back sweetly as our lips met.

“Eren. Happy Birthday.”

I sighed, absolutely content.

This was perfect.

“Thank you.”

“You’re not supposed to thank me, brat.”

“Oh? Then what should I say?”

“You should tell me that you’re happy. And then you should blow out the candle before your cake is completely covered with a layer of wax.”

I laughed.

“Actually, maybe you should blow out the candle first and then you can tell me all about how happy you are while we’re eating.”

I turned toward the cake and watched the small flame as I thought of what I wanted most in the world. Leaning forward I inhaled deeply and let out my breath as I whispered my request in my mind.

I sat back against Levi and smiled. He held me tighter and then shifted me onto one of his knees so that he could position the cake in between us.

“So before I devour this, can I at least know what it is?” I asked as he handed me a fork.

“Supposedly it’s MilkyWay, but there’s a good chance that it tastes like absolute shit so I have a backup in the fridge that’s normal chocolate.”

My entire body shook as I laughed. My cheeks were beginning to hurt from smiling so much.

“I’m happy Levi. I’m so incredibly happy.”

We spent the rest of the evening talking quietly while eating cake. More than a few kisses were exchanged and they did surprisingly taste like MilkyWay. Well, MilkyWay and Levi combined into one, so basically pure heaven.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Baccano  
> Stein's Gate  
> Mawaru Penguindrum  
> Death Note  
> Code Geass  
> Mirai Nikki  
> Angel Beats  
> Neon Genisis Evengelion  
> Inuyasha  
> Date A Live  
> Fairy Tail  
> Noragami  
> The World Only God Knows  
> Sakurasou no Pet na Kanojo  
> Hunter X Hunter  
> Sailor Moon  
> Sword Art Online  
> One Piece  
> Full Metal Alchemist  
> Trigun  
> Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei  
> Kimi ni Todoke


	17. Whatever Happens, Happens

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Whatever Happens, Happens"- Cowboy Bebop
> 
> Isabel and Farlan are getting ready to say goodbye to Levi and their friends, but decide that they want to give Levi one last parting gift, while Eren does his best to be there for Levi and help him through it all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So small little warning for this chapter: There is some smut at the end.
> 
> I really wanted it to be like a SURPRISE THERE'S SMUT!!! But at the same time I know that there are some people who may not especially like smut, solo...i gave you all fair warning. I'm still pretty excited tho cuz I really wasn't gong to have any smut until next chapter, but hey shit happens and Levi and Eren were just ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ they were just goin for it man. And yes. There will be more smut next chapter. ヾ(＠⌒ー⌒＠)ノ 
> 
> Also in the last chapter all the time skips were about a month, these ones are shorter. Some are meant to be read as a few days, but everything is largely left to interpretation.

“Okay Levi, I need you to do us a favor and not freak out.”

“Oh my God, I’m going to kill you two. What the fuck did you guys do and how much money is it going to cost me?”

“Oh wow, I’m hurt. This is what he thinks of us Isabel,” Farlan shook his head sadly.

“I don’t know Farlan, it might cost him a little bit of money if you know what I mean.”

Farlan shrugged in response but didn’t acknowledge the comment any more than that.

“Close your eyes,” Isabel hummed happily.

“No way in fuck am I closing my eyes.”

Isabel pouted. “You’re no fun big bro.”

He raised his eyebrows. “You two have about five more seconds before I beat whatever this thing is out of you.”

“Okay, okay.” Farlan rushed out of the room, which I wasn’t really expecting. He came back in seconds later holding a large open cardboard box and placing it down gently on the coffee table in front of Levi. I edged closer to try and see what was in the box.

Farlan stepped back and stood next to Isabel with his hands clasped in front of him like he was awaiting the impending doom that was coming but didn’t feel any remorse for his actions.

“We got it for you because we feel bad about leaving you all alone to be honest.” She bounced up and down on her feet and then seemed to see me and quickly added, “I mean we know you have Eren and all, but he doesn’t annoy you nearly enough to make up for the two of us!”

My curiosity was killing me.

Levi seemed to be feeling the same way. He pulled the box closer and peered into it warily.

“ _Holy Fuck_ ,” He breathed.

Just then a small mewl was heard from the box and I almost lost my shit. A cat? They bought Levi a fucking cat?

I sighed. I hate cats.

Well…I don’t know if I _really_ hate them, but I’ve sure as hell never had a reason to like them. The “I Love Cats” magazine that I had been spammed with definitely didn’t help.

“Is this thing fucking sanitary?”

“Relax chief we gave him his shots and we bathed him this morning so chill the fuck out and your welcome.”

Levi did in fact visibly relax. It was long before he reached down and pulled the creature out of the box to reveal that it was in fact a cat. Or kitten to be precise.

  
Actually, maybe little fluff ball would be more accurate.

Its fur was completely black and it was pretty small.

“Eren…come here.” He beckoned.

“Uhhhh I don’t know if that’s a good idea.” His gaze briefly flicked to mine. “Are you allergic?” He asked with wide eyes. His voice sounded disappointed.

Aw Fuck. Fuck you Eren, don’t you dare take this away from him.

“No, I’m not allergic. It’s fine.”

I slowly made my way over to the couch and sat down next to him. I hesitantly looked at the little fluff ball, half expecting red eyes and a creepy expression.

And Oh. My. God.

Large round blue eyes stared back at me and I felt my jaw go slack.

Levi was stroking the cat gently with one hand as it softly pawed his other arm.

“Do you want to hold him?”

My eyebrows shot up and I looked at him unsure.

He smiled gently at me, “Here.” He placed the kitten into my hands and I held it against my chest stroking its fur. It was so soft and it was gazing up at me with these big blue eyes that no mortal being with a soul could possibly resist. It’s two front paws pressed against my chest and it yawned sleepily.

“Levi. I’m melting. It’s too adorable.” I heard Isabel chuckle.

The kitty was pawing gently at my chest and then shivered.

“Awww baby, are you cold?” I wrapped my hands around its small fuzzy body and held it close to me. It meowed and burrowed its small head into my shirt.

I looked at Levi who was staring back at me with an expression of pure adoration on his face. He was wearing the most beautiful smile.

I handed him his new pet back, unable to keep the little fuzz ball away from his new owner despite how much I wanted to keep him for myself.

“We bought some cat toys and basic supplies too.”

“Wasn’t that expensive?”

The two of them shrugged. “Don’t worry Levi you’re worth it. And Uncle Kenny used to have a cat so we just figured.” Farlan shrugged.

“I was too young to remember if you loved or hated it though. Farlan was convinced that you loved it so I was prepared to blame this whole thing on him if it got shot to hell.”

Levi chuckled. “Both. I hated and loved the damn thing.”

“So…do you like him?”

  
All three of us stared at him. Waiting. The next word that he spoke would determine a lot of things.

“Yes. I like him.”

“YA-HOO!!!” Isabel screamed at the top of her lungs, fist pumping the air in a perfect Black Star imitation. She turned and gave Farlan a double high five.

I felt a nudge on my shoulder and turned.

“What do you want to name him?”

“Me?!” I pointed to myself confused.

“Yes you, dumbass.”

“B-but Levi! It’s your cat and if you let me name it it’s going to be something anime!”

He shrugged his shoulders. “I know.”

I was fucking speechless. He was giving me control of his cat’s name? Why would he do that?

“So? Any names that come to mind for a cat?”

“Uhhhh Kuro?”

“I like it, what does it mean?”

“…Blackie…”

“Fuck no!” Well, can’t say I wasn’t expecting that.

“The only cat I can think of right now that’s not named Kuroh is Shamisen and if you name it that, I’m calling it Shami.” Okay, so maybe I had spent yesterday re-watching the melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya and now that was the only cat that I could think of, but whatever.

He shrugged again. “That’s fine. Shami it is.”

I’m pretty sure my jaw went slack. Why was he being so agreeable?

“Stop giving me that face brat. It’s our cat. I wanted you to at least name it.”

I blushed deeply as my heart pretty much exploded.

Everything was so perfect right now and the smile on Levi’s face as he looked at Shami and me was so beautiful.

Even though he had been so stressed about Farlan leaving and Izzy following suite for the past few days, he looked so happy right in this moment, surrounded by his family. Including the new furry addition, of course.

~

“See ya man!” Farlan yelled with a backbreaking hug. “I’ll try to drive up in a few weeks, so come make me dinner okay?”

“Yeah of course! Anytime!”

Levi cuffed him on the back of his head. “Focus on your school work, you dumbass. If I find out that you’ve been slacking on anything I’ll beat your ass.”

“Heard loud and clear sir,” Farlan yelled doing a salute in Levi’s direction.

Levi nodded his approval and looked over at the car, “You sure you have everything you need?”

“Yeah. This is just the last of the shit that needs to go down; everything’s pretty much all there.”

Farlan was taking the car that he used to share with Isabel to med school, since Levi had his own car and Isabel didn’t exactly need it anymore…

Luckily Farlan was attending a school that was only about five hours away. It really wasn’t a bad drive, so he could come visit every so often as long as he planned a little in advance. Or we could go visit him. Whichever.

Izzy, on the other hand, we’d only be able to see during holidays.

I sighed. We’d be seeing her off later. Farlan was a little bummed that he couldn’t go to the airport, but at the same time he said that he was a little glad because he probably would’ve shed a few tears.

Manly tears. They would have been very manly tears.

The idea of everyone leaving was getting kind of depressing—so much for a happy and relaxing summer. Levi was still holding up pretty well, though. I made a mental note to start taking him on more dates and drown him in affection. Because he damn well deserved it. And maybe needed it a little bit.

~

“A medium dark roast and,” he threw a glance over at me, “a café mocha?” I nodded smiling.

“Same size,” Levi finished turning back to the barista.

As we stepped aside to wait for our orders, I beamed at Levi. “You know my coffee order! That’s so cute!”

“Of course I know your coffee order, brat.” He quipped flicking my head, “I lost my favorite pair of pants to it after all.”

“Right~…” I thought back to that afternoon, back when the sight of Levi had me cowering in fear and seething with rage all at the same time.  “Well I could buy you a pair of red wine pants to make up for it.” I grinned at him. “What size skinny jeans do you wear, Levi?”

“Hgn. Like I would say.”

“Well, if you won’t tell me I could always measure myself,” I whispered in his ear slithering my arms around his waist. I moved closer to him and gently rolled my hips as I grabbed his perfect ass with both my hands.

“Shitty brat.” He murmured with a smirk, lips ghosting against mine.

“EHEM!” Jean was standing there with a scowl on his face as he shoved our drinks towards us.

“Just because I’m happy you got your crush to reciprocate your feelings, Jaeger, doesn’t mean I’m okay with you two making out and dry humping in front of me and my costumers.”

Levi cocked an eyebrow at him and then made a show of scanning the practically vacant café only to look at Jean again with a shrug of his shoulders.  Jean’s face darkened.

“Just because there aren’t any costumers right now doesn’t mean that some homophobic asshole might not walk in at any second and start a fight. Then I’ll have to punch him in the face and clean up all the blood before I go home to live a life of unemployment all because of you two.”

“Wow, Jeany-boy. Impressive.”

“Yeah, whatever-the-fuck Jaeger Bombastic. Grab your drinks and go do whatever you damn unicorns have planned before—”

“Jean!” Marco called as the door chimed and four costumers walked in. More cars were entering the parking lot.

Jean sighed. “That.”

“Well good luck with the lunch time rush,” I threw over my shoulder as I grabbed my drink with one hand, lacing my fingers through Levi’s with my other.

As we walked towards Levi’s car, he shot a warning look at me.

“As cute as your ass is, one drop of that sugary shit gets spilled and I’ll blast a hole in you.” ([x](http://myanimelist.net/anime/8630/Hidan_no_Aria))

“[Fuyukai-desu](http://data.whicdn.com/images/87244059/large.jpg)” ([x](http://myanimelist.net/anime/18153/Kyoukai_no_Kanata))

“Excuse me?”

“Beyond the Boundary,” I responded, climbing into the car. “It means ‘how unpleasant’. A personal favorite, really.”

He smirked. “So ‘[fuck you kai-des](https://www.google.com/search?q=fuyukai+desu&client=safari&rls=en&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0CAcQ_AUoAWoVChMI3qSo5oq8yAIVwnUeCh0tjAGM&biw=1207&bih=633#imgrc=7lGkULRdDJfzyM%3A)’ means ‘how unpleasant’ in Japanese?”

I beamed, “Yep that’s pretty much it.”

He narrowed his eyes at me, though the smile was still there.

“You’re so fucking random.” He leaned over as I tugged my seatbelt across my lap and pressed a kiss to my cheek.

“You started it with Hidan no Aria you know,” I mumbled blushing at his display of affection.

It was so fucking adorable when he made anime references, even if he didn’t realize he was doing it. And the way he leaned over and kissed me like it was the most natural thing in the fucking world had my insides doing summersaults.

I fucking loved it.

Levi and I were heading out to do a few errands and then… we were going on a casual date.

Levi had freaking offered to take me shopping. Okay, so maybe it had taken the embarrassment of Levi pointing out that I had hole in my pants…but it was so unbelievably worth it. Just the thought of Levi trying on different pairs of pants and asking me how he looked had my mouth salivating.

And I was so not kidding about the red skinny jeans.

Levi eased his car into the parking lot and pulled into the first spot that he saw.

“Why did you park so far away?” I asked as I climbed out of the vehicle.

“So we have to walk longer to get there and I can do this,” he replied, walking around the car and taking my hand in his. He gave it a squeeze and then started walking towards the storefront. Even after all these months, he never failed to make me happy with the smallest things.

I practically skipped into the store with a gleeful expression glued to my face.

It wasn’t long before I had amassed an armful of different clothes that I wanted to try on. I found Levi to tell him that I was headed to the changing room and would leave my jacket over the door so that he could find me if he needed to.

Entering the changing room, I was struck by the strange desire to start trying on different swim suits. I bet I could look hot in a [onesie with butterflies](http://fe867b.medialib.glogster.com/lusiw123/media/13/13537ad238d28f42ab79833f6bf53028223cfe05/rei-butterfly-swimsuit.jpg). Levi would love that.

I was almost to the end of the pile when I got stuck on one pair of jeans.

They were hugging me in all the right places and, even though they were a little on the tight side, I had a feeling that I looked good in them. I was staring in the mirror, twisting and turning in different directions trying to look at myself from different angles to figure out if my ass looked as good as I thought it did.

I yelped as a loud knock sounded on the door.

“Oi, you in there, brat?”

 “Yeah, gimme a sec!”

I unlocked the door so that he could open it as I continued assessing myself in the mirror. I watched his reflection as he opened the thin door and met my eyes in the mirror quickly before lowering his gaze to scan what I was wearing. His eyes narrowed and an expression I hadn’t seen before flashed across the features of his face.

“We’re buying those.” There was no question in the statement.

“Are you s—”

“Yes.” He affirmed and there was no room to argue.

I smiled at him… because how could I not? He sucked in a breath before swiftly turning on his heel and marching out of the room, shutting the door behind him.

Thank you Mama for giving me this booty passed down the Jaeger family line for generations.

~

“Awwwwww,” Isabel squealed. “You guys are way too good to me!”

“Tch.” Levi groaned next to my ear for the nth time. “More shit that she doesn’t need,” he muttered, leaning further back into the couch.

“Shhhh. Let her enjoy her time with her friends, you bully. It doesn’t matter if they give her stupid shit, they’re just trying to show that they love her and look,” I gestured at the group of people crowded into the living room, “half them are trying their best not to break out into tears.”

The only people in the room that I recognized were Christa and Ymir, so it felt a little like I was imposing on Isabel’s time with her friends, but she had insisted that Mikasa and I be there for her going away party. Even though we would be going with her and her family to the airport; she wanted us all to be there to say one last goodbye.

Hell. Forget all her friends, _I_ was trying my best not to cry and I wasn’t even saying goodbye yet.

I felt a poke. “She’s not dying you know. You don’t have to get all sniffle-y.”

“And when did you become so good at reading thoughts?” I turned my head and stuck my tongue out at Levi.

“There’s this magical thing called Skype, along with all these new weird inventions like Instagram and SnapChat. Hell, you can even use Facebook. It’ll be like she never left,” he said, returning my frown and sticking his tongue out to complete the look.

I wondered if Levi had been telling himself the exact same thing during the weeks leading up to Isabel’s departure to make it easier. I felt a small jab of pain at the thought.

The least I could do was be with him and try to keep him happy. Or at least keep his mind off of it.

“Ngn. Don’t do that. I _will_ lick you.”

“Tch. Gross.”

I leaned my head back against his shoulder with a laugh, “You say gross, but I know you love it.”

“Stupid brat.” But I could hear the smile in his words.

“Hey Eren, move your fucking feet. My ass is getting flat from sitting on the floor.”

Ymir didn’t even wait for me to move my feet before throwing herself onto the sofa.

“It wasn’t that nice of an ass to begin with,” I retorted with a snobbish face.

“Wow, you little bitch.” She laughed, kicking me lightly. “Baby, come keep me company. Jaeger fuck-face is verbally attacking me.”

Christa readily complied and moved from the floor to Ymir’s lap in a similar position to Levi and me.

“Well, I was going to let someone else take the couch. The floor’s not bad. I think the rug was kinda comfy; it was soft.”

Ymir smirked and rubbed her head and wove her arms around Christa’s abdomen. “If they’re too chicken to sit on the couch with the cuddly couple that isn’t actually doing anything then I’ll take the couch for myself, thank you very much.”

I knew I liked Ymir.

Christa turned back to me, “Oooh Eren! I really love your cat! He’s so cute and fluffy! What’s his name?”

“It’s Shami.”

“Awww that’s adorable!” She squealed in delight, as the smile on her face grew brighter.

Shami was still on the floor casually slinking from one person to the next as they gradually wore out his interest.

“No, kitty come back!”

I watched wide-eyed as one (rather stupid) girl reached out and grabbed Shami, yanking him backwards so that they could keep petting him. As Shami tried to worm away the girl kept grabbing him and all of the girls sitting around her were huddling closer all poking their fingers at him.

“Wait stop! He needs space! Don’t do th—”

My warning was in compete vain and even as I launched myself towards the group I could see everything happening almost in slow motion. Shami reared back and defended himself like any cat would. Luckily I had just enough time to get the senseless girl out of the way before she got her face clawed off, which is exactly where Shami was aiming. However the long scratch down my arm that I had been rewarded dwarfed my incredible success.

I hissed in pain as my brain registered what had just happened.

“Oh my God! I’m so sorry! Are you okay?” At least the girl realized her mistake and was apologizing for it.

 “Don’t worry about it.  I’m just glad that Shami didn’t rip my shirt or anything. Good thing I wore half-sleeves today.” I chuckled halfheartedly.

“Are you sure you’re all right?”

“Yeah I’m fine. It’s just a little scratch; some disinfectant and I’ll be good to go. Just make sure that you’re more careful around cats. They’re not like dogs. If you grab them when they want to be left alone they’ll scratch you.” I smiled brightly at her in the hopes that she wouldn’t feel guilty, but I also wanted her to take my warning seriously.

She blushed. “T-t-thank you, that’s really nice of you. I promise I’ll remember that. I’m just super glad that you’re okay!”

Suddenly Levi was behind me, one hand around my waist the other gently grabbing my arm to assess the damage.

“I could help you dissen…” The girl trailed off.

Either she had noticed the possessive hold he had on my waist or Levi had sent her a glare while I wasn’t paying attention.

Most likely the latter, because even glancing at his face now I was tempted to apologize for my behavior even though I hadn’t done anything wrong. He looked absolutely furious that this girl had been the reason I had gotten hurt.

“Levi. It’s not that bad.” I said, trying to soothe him.

He gave a curt nod before pulling me up with him as he stood. “Let’s go get you cleaned up.”

“Okay.”

I felt a sudden surge of rage at myself for ruining his evening by getting myself hurt, but at the same time, I could help but enjoy the attention I was getting from him.

I sat at the kitchen counter with my arm in front of me as Levi disinfected it.

“All right, brat. You’re good to go.”

“What? Aren’t you going to kiss the boo-boo?” I pouted playfully.

“What are you, three?” He asked flicking my forehead.

I stuck my tongue out. “Maybe.”

He sighed, but to my surprise, he actually leaned down and placed a soft kiss on the scratch mark.

“Levi.”

“Yeah, yeah. Let’s go get Shami settled in for the night before he attacks anyone else.”

~

Mikasa and I had hung back behind everyone as they filtered out of the house. All of her friends had come to her going-away party and it had taken close to an hour just for everyone to get out the door. Everyone kept hugging Isabel and telling her to keep in touch.

The front door was finally closed and Isabel sagged against it, emotionally exhausted.

“Wanna hit the sack? You’ve gotta be up bright and early tomorrow.” Mikasa reminded her.

“Yeah. I know.” She glanced at the stairs and nodded.

“I’m heading up. You coming Mika?”

“Yeah.” Mikasa slid off the wall and followed Isabel upstairs. They’d be sharing the room for the night. I decided to go look for Levi. I found him in the kitchen, sipping a glass of wine.

His face was solemn and his eyes stared unseeingly at the counter as he swirled the liquid in his hand.

It was too depressing to see him like that.

I approached quietly, walking across the room until I was right next to him. He stirred slowly, glancing up as he felt my presence.

“Eren?” It was barely audible, but I still heard him. He leaned against me and closed his eyes saying my name again, louder.

“Yes. I’m right here.” I wrapped my arms around him and held him close to me. The wine glass clanked clumsily on the counter as he desperately clung to me. His arms curling tightly around my waist pulling me closer as he burrowed his head into my chest.

“I’m right here, Levi.”

He was holding me like I was the only thing keeping him grounded and when he looked up at me I almost cried. His emotions were plainly written across his face and his eyes weren’t concealing anything. He let down his guard completely in front of me, letting me see him at his most vulnerable.

“Eren. Please stay.”

“Yes. Yes, I’m staying. I’m not going anywhere, Levi.”

He exhaled.

I cupped his face and stroked my thumbs across his cheeks, staring into his eyes. His eyes were dry, but that didn’t mean shit. He was an emotional wreck on the inside.

“Eren.” His voice was soft and light, but it filled me up to the core. “Eren. Please don’t leave.”

I leaned down and kissed him as sweetly as I could. Trying to convey everything I felt for him.

He sighed when we broke apart. Eyes opening again so he could stare into mine.

“Levi, I love you.” I threaded my fingers into his silky hair, still holding his head firmly. “I love you and I’m not going anywhere. “

His eyes widened a fraction and I smiled, knowing that I had finally gotten through to him.

And then his lips were against mine.

Our lips moved against each other desperately trying to portray what we both felt. Even though he hadn’t said anything in response to my confession, I could tell that this was his reply. He was _showing_ me that he loved me and that was fine. Kissing me passionately with his arms wrapped tightly around me.

The kiss quickly became more hungry and wild and I was desperately trying to pull him even closer. My hands were tangled in those beautiful silky locks and I was making a mess of them.

We split, the two of us panting, trying to catch our breath so we could connect our lips again faster. I opened my eyes to meet his gaze.

He looked so fucking sexy I almost moaned just from staring at him. His pupils were blown wide with lust and his hair was sticking up in different places, courtesy of my attention. His lips were slightly swollen, but they looked so fucking delicious.

“Levi.” I moaned his name seductively and the sound I got in return was so fucking hot.

He pushed me into the nearest wall and hungrily pressed his lips to mine, inserting his tongue again.

“Ngn. Eren. _Shit_. _Eren._ ”His hands crept further down my body and he guided one of my legs up around his waist, grabbing my ass in the process.

I moaned again.

I couldn’t care less if anyone heard us; Levi was mine and I loved him so fucking much. No one was going to stop me from showing him how I felt and him doing the same.

“Eren,” he growled my name into my ear and then proceeded to bite down. I gasped in delight and moved my left hand down, clutching at his shoulder.

He began sucking and licking the skin on my neck and I tilted my head to give him better access, wordlessly begging him not to stop.

I couldn’t help but roll my hips into his, showing him how painfully aroused I was. He moaned at the action and before I knew what was happening, both of his hands were on my ass as he moved against me. We were grinding against each other, panting and moaning, exchanging needy kisses every chance we could get. Levi was just as hard as I was and it was driving me crazy. I wanted him so badly and I could tell how rampant his desire for me was as well.

“Fuck. Bedroom. We should do this in the bedroom,” he muttered between kisses.

I let out a whine as I fisted my hand deeper into his hair and pulled. “I don’t want to. Now Levi. I want you now.”

I was rewarded with a bite on my shoulder.

“I’m not chancing anyone walking in on us and seeing you like this. Only me. Only I can see you like this, Eren.”

“Mmm yes. Levi. Only you.” I was still placing kisses all over his face when he slowly pulled away and grabbed my hand.

Suddenly, we were rushing up the stairs and he was pulling me into his bedroom, slamming the door shut behind us.

We resumed our heated session as he shoved my back against the closed door, hurriedly crashing our lips together again. He lifted me up into the air like I weighed nothing and I wrapped my legs around him instinctively. He began moving us in the direction of the bed and I found myself suddenly thrown backwards. I was sprawled out on the bed as Levi loomed above me.

He placed one of his arms next to my head to support his weight as he leaned down to kiss me again. I busied myself running one of my hands up his arm and cupping his face with the other.

He pressed his knee in-between my legs and moved closer to me, unbuttoning my shirt with his long fingers in a matter of seconds. I quickly did the same to him. When I finished he leaned back and shrugged off the article, throwing it behind him indifferently.

We weren't satisfied until the both of us were devoid of all of our clothing.

“Shit, Eren. You’re so fucking beautiful.”

He covered his body with mine and despite the gnawing fear in the back of our minds that someone would hear, we were too lost in each other to care.

~~~

I lazily reached up and stroked his face. He really was gorgeous. And the sweat that plastered bits of his hair to his forehead was sexy too. I combed my fingers gently though his hair as he nuzzled my neck.

Propping himself up on his elbows, he looked at me smiling.

“We should go wash up. C’mon.”

Pulling me up, he led us both to the shower and we both quickly cleaned ourselves.

I hurriedly brushed my teeth and left the bathroom as Levi finished up.

Pulling my pajama bottoms and undershirt out of the bag that I had brought over, I contently got dressed and curled under the covers. I felt the bed move as Levi joined me. He climbed under the sheets and wrapped his arms around me. I hummed happily and snuggled closer to him.

I was just drifting off to sleep when I heard him murmur, “I love you Eren,” pressing a light kiss on my cheek.

“I love you too, Levi. I love you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soul Eater  
> All anime eve that have a cat name Kuro (Blue exorcist, trigun, Love Hina Again, Little Busters! EX, Say I love You, ...Cyborg Kuro-chan...yeah you get the idea.)  
> The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya  
> Hidan no Aria  
> Beyond the Boundary  
> Free  
> FullMetal Alchemist (shout out to Mooloodoom)


	18. No Regrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "We have to live a life with no regrets"-Portgas D. Ace (One Piece)
> 
>  
> 
> Epilogue  
> (Lots of time skips. They are generally larger jumps than in previous chapters)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All right the last chapter is done! So this marks the completion of my first fanfic and I'm really glad that you stuck around till the end ヾ(＠⌒ー⌒＠)ノ thank you so much! I was also a pop head and took my time on this chapter because I wanted it to be good and I didn't want to feel like I rushed the last chapter and ended it with this huge pile of crap that I threw together. So I took my time. I hope you guys like the result. (This chapter also turned out to be a bit of a monster. So like reeeeeaaaallllyyy long)
> 
> As always and forever: Enjoy!

“Eren.”

“Yeah?”

He stopped playing with my hair and wrapped his arms tightly around me.

Now thoroughly distracted from the television, I gave him my full attention, turning so that I could look at him.

“Are you…” He cleared his throat. “Are you staying tonight?” His voice was clear and confident despite his multiple attempts at getting the question out.

My eyebrows shot up at what he was implying.

I broke out in a delirious grin. “If you really want me to.”

He shook his head. “I wouldn't be asking if I didn't want you too, but I want to know what you want." He smiled up at me and he looked so young and joyful. Full of life.

I beamed at him and pushed our foreheads together before kissing him once again. "I want to stay."

His hands had somehow found their way to my hips, slowly grinding against mine and I chuckled.

“Couch sex?” I asked with a quirk of my eyebrows.

“Oh fuck no. Bedroom.”

I laughed wholeheartedly. His lips had a faint curve to them as well.

I caressed his cheeks with my hands, trailing them down to his chest. "You sure you don't want to bend me over the arm of the couch?"

“Bedroom. Now.”

* * *

I draped my arm over his chest as my head found its usual spot right over his heart. I was really getting too used to spending my nights with Levi. This bed was starting to feel more welcoming than the one I called my own.

I just loved this so much.

Being with Levi.

Curling up next to him in his bed. Whether we were just holding each other for reassurance after a long day, cuddling in a desperate attempt to keep warm or basking in the afterglow of sex, it was all perfect.

Sure, we had fought about who got which side of the bed, but we pretty much ended up sleeping on top of each other anyway so I guess it didn’t really matter.

Levi was also a real stickler about clothes on the floor. It was fine to throw them on the floor before bed, but come morning they better go in the hamper. Or else.

Not to mention that sex was not to be done on the comforter. Bed, yes. Sheets, fine.  Sheets could easily be washed. Hell, we could even spend all night sleeping in them before they got washed, but you fucking better pull off the bedspread before any action went down.

I chuckled at how he had reacted the one time I had been lying naked on top of the comforter waiting for him. Let’s just say it didn’t go so well.

“What’s so funny?”

“Mmm I was thinking about how much I like you.”

“Oh? You like me? That’s good I guess.”

I laughed. “Yeah. And as it turns out, you’re quite a lucky bastard because I not only like you, but” I stopped to lean upwards and press a kiss to his jaw. “ I really love you, Levi.” I murmured against his skin. “I love talking to you and touching you and just being with you. Holding you like this…” my voice trailed off. “I love it all.” I voiced softly in conclusion.

 I burrowed my head back into his chest, feeling his body heat radiating off his skin and hummed contently.

His hand reach down and started stroking my hair. He smoothly ran the strands between his fingers over and over again before moving on to a new section of hair.

“Stay.”

“Hmm?”

“Stay with me.”

I smiled at him. “I am dummy. I always stay afterward and there is no way in hell I’m getting up now.”

He shook his head. “That’s not what I meant.”

I felt confusion set in. I perched myself up, using my hand on his chest for balance.

“Then what did you mean?”

“I want you to live here. With me.”

For the first time in a while, I was rendered speechless.

“A-are you sure?”

He nodded. “Only if you want, though. It’s completely up to you. I won’t force you to do anything you don’t want to. You don’t have to respond right now either. I promise the offer will still stand whenever you make up your mind.”

My lower lip trembled. I couldn’t take it anymore. I launched myself at him and kissed him all over. I nibbled at his lips and then kissed him deeply.

“Yeah. Yes. I want to live with you.”

“Dumbass, think about it first.”

“I have.” I smiled at his face. “Don’t worry, I don’t have expectations or anything. It’s not like I’m playing fantasies over in my head where I’m your cute little wife.” I made a face of distaste.

“So what do you think about?” His hand was back on my face, stroking my cheek.

“I-I think about how much I like your bed. And I wish I could sleep here every night. And I’ve thought about how much I love using your kitchen and I love eating dinner with you.” I turned away slightly embarrassed but continued speaking quietly. “Sometimes when we’re cleaning, I think about how it feels like we’re cleaning _our_ house and it makes me stupidly excited…and I’ve always been careful not to say that in front of you because I didn’t know how you’d react.”

Suddenly, the world was turning upside down and I felt my back hit the bed. Levi was looming over me.

“Le—?”

He crashed his lips into mine. He ran his tongue along my lips asking for entrance and plunged deep into my mouth when I granted it.

It was one hell of a kiss, too.

He made sure to really take his time with it, leaving me an incredibly winded mess when he was done.

“How are you so fucking adorable?”

“Umm…I don’t know?”

“Stupid.” He laughed and wrapped his arms around me. “You know we’re gonna get into fights right?”

“We already do.”

He humphed in agreement, probably remembering the bedspread incident.

“I’m probably going to be on your ass even more,” he said suggestively.

“Ngn. You should watch out. I might be the one on _your_ ass.” I grinned broadly.

* * *

“Hey Levi, you okay?”

  
He was frowning, holding up a bunch of papers as his eyes skimmed over the contents.

“Yeah. I’m fine.” He muttered distractedly.

“Okay. I wanted to let you know that I just finished putting on the last coating of paint in the guest room. I’m gonna go shower.”

I gave him a peck on the cheek before running off to the bathroom we now shared.

He lowered the papers in his hand in favor of giving me a quick peck as well.

“Alright. I’ll have lunch ready when you get out.”

I let my mind wander as I enjoyed the cold spray of the shower.

Levi and I were in the process of remodeling the entire upstairs of the house. After emptying out what little remained in Izzy and Farlan’s old rooms, we decided that some repainting was definitely in order. Isabel’s room was being converted into a guest space since it was bigger.

Moving all of the things that had been left behind was a bit nostalgic, but after leaving everything untouched for so long, it was time for a bit of change. After all, we couldn’t leave their rooms like that forever.

It was obvious that no one was living in either of the rooms.  The best thing to do was to fix them up and put them to use.

True to his word, I could smell lunch as I got dressed and hurriedly descended the stairs, my growling stomach urging me to go faster.

I was smiling as I walked into the kitchen, but my steps faltered when I saw Levi.

He looked murderous.

Isabel’s old laptop was sitting on the counter, receiving the full force of Levi’s rage, and I was a bit surprised that the screen hadn’t exploded from the heat of his glare.

“Whoa there, babe. Wanna step away from the laptop and tell me why you’re trying to shatter it with your eyes?”

Instead of responding, he thrust a few pieces of paper in my direction.

Something in my gut told me that these were the papers he had been reading before.

At the top of the first page in large neat script was, “A Magnolia Yaoi”

My jaw dropped. “Isabel wrote a yaoi?!”

Levi grunted in response as he crossed his arms over his chest. “Read.”

I quickly started skimming over one of the pages. It looked like a planning sheet for some kind of story.  Bits of plot were written in bullet points and arrows decorated the page, linking certain things together and pointing random details back to the main focus of the story. It appeared to be a one-shot of some sort. A smutty one-shot.

There were no character names on the page but based off the plot, it was someone’s birthday and their lover had been unable to make them a cake and had instead decided to give himself as a gift.

A rather cliché outline.

 But definitely a widely used one. I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t read more than my fair share of fanfics that centered on a birthday gone smutty.

Glancing at the other pages, I saw that they contained different sketches. The first page just had some kiss scenes, but the last page made my eyebrows shoot way up.

Well, these certainly weren’t G-rated.

“Wow. Reverse Cowboy. Impressive.”

Levi snorted. “That’s not even the best part.” At this, he turned the computer around so that I could see what he had been looking at.

Pulling the laptop closer, I was greeted with a word document that appeared to be the manifestation of the fanfic that had been drafted out on paper.  My curiosity was piqued and I quickly began reading the document.

_L had a difficult time cooking for much of the same reasons as Germany from ‘Hetalia’. He simply hated getting his appliances dirty. H_ _owever, this time he was sure that if he just tried hard enough and followed the recipe the cake would turn out wonderfully._

L?

So this must be a Death Note fanfic.

I raised an eyebrow at Levi.

“I know you really love Death Note and you don’t approve of [L/Light](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/7c/08/fe/7c08fe69c33e99a6fffc0d2a8da6903f.jpg) shipping, but this is a harmless fanfic.”

“Trust me. Keep reading.”

_L looked at the abomination before him pitifully. His lover was going to be home in 20 minutes and he had nothing even barely edible to present to him. Opening the fridge, L was only met with half a container of strawberries and the bowl of icing that he had made while the cake had been baking. Looking back and forth from what was supposed to be a delicious birthday cake and the icing, L decided not to waste the sugary substance that had actually turned out well._

_He sighed to himself; at least he could clean up this mess in 20 minutes and hopefully think of something else fast._

It didn’t seem to be anything too strange. Maybe Levi had just never read slash before and it was freaking him out.

_L was still in the bathroom changing when he heard the front door open and his boyfriend call his name. Glancing in the mirror one last time he sighed at the dark circles under his eyes. Even though the bags under his eyes had gotten much better after meeting the brunette (that soon became his lover), he still suffered from insomnia from time to time._

_‘Well, nothing to be done about it now’, the raven thought to himself._

_He quickly dashed out into the bedroom and made sure that everything was the way he wanted._

Lingerie. L is definitely wearing lingerie or something. Was Levi upset about that? I mean the idea of L in lingerie was kind of amusing, albeit very weird, but definitely had a touch of humor to it. Maybe Isabel had written this all as a joke.

_E was exhausted._

“Wait. Who’s E?” I asked in confusion.

“I wonder,” Levi practically purred, voice laced with sarcasm and anger.

I began to read the fanfic more quickly, trying to piece together what was going on.

_All he had wanted to do this morning was cuddle with L, but instead, he had been met with an enormous list of errands to do and was kicked out of the house without so much as a ‘happy birthday’ and told to ‘take his time’- whatever that meant._

_Finally back, the brunette sighed as he toed off his shoes and made his way upstairs, shrugging off his jacket as he went. E noted the silence encompassing him. He was met with a closed door as he turned the corner to enter L's room. Quietly E turned the knob and slowly opened the door, not wanting to take any chances in case L was sleeping. However, the sight he was met with was beyond his wildest dreams._

_There L was, in all his glory, lying on the bed in a light pink baby doll set. E's eyes greedily raked up and down L's body, taking in the matching panties that barely held his dick. He subconsciously moved closer to his boyfriend, dropping his jacket on the floor._

I couldn’t hold back the laughter that bubbled out of my throat. The idea of L in a pink baby doll lingerie set from Victoria Secret was just too fucking hilarious.

“I should’ve known you’d think it was funny.”

“I’m sorry Levi. It’s just I can’t picture L in a pink baby doll for my life.”

“Yeah, neither can I,” he practically growled.

“Levi, I know he’s your favorite character in Death Note, but there’s no need to get so upset about it.”

Levi rolled his eyes at me and made a sound of exasperation. “I can’t believe you haven’t gotten it yet.”

“Gotten what?”

“Eren.” He stared directly into my eyes and spoke with a stern voice. “It’s not a Death Note fanfic.

It’s…not? Then what is it?

The confusion must have been evident on my face because Levi just rolled his eyes again and told me to keep reading, saying that I would figure it out soon. Hopefully.

Something about the way Levi was acting made me feel increasingly uneasy as I continued reading.

_All it took was that silky smooth voice saying, “Welcome home, Love. Happy Birthday,” and he was on top of him like a moth to a flame. The pink looked so nice against his alabaster skin in the dimly lit room._

_E watched as the man underneath him bit his lip, “I wanted you to see it. I hope you like your present.”_

_He smirked; 'liked' was an understatement._

_"Mmm, you have no idea." E leaned forward and pressed his lips to L's. Their kiss was chaste; however, when E tried to move back L knotted his hand in his hair and smashed their mouths back together. Moaning, E began grinding against L, his pants far too tight already._

“Okay, can I just ask one thing? Where did he even get the fucking baby doll? Like you open up the closet and SURPRISE!”

“It doesn’t matter brat, just keep reading.”

I pouted at him but continued reading regardless. The story was just getting to the good part after all.

_“You have me all fired up. Such a bad boy.” He brought his hand up to caress L's nipple through the fabric and then pinched it. L gasped under him, and E took the opportunity to slip his tongue his mouth._

_L fumbled as he tried to unbutton E's shirt. He could barely concentrate on the task at hand as E's tongue invaded his wet cavern._

_Without the knowledge of how, E's shirt fell to the ground, forgotten. L's hands were all over E. Ghosting over his nipples down his toned chest and abdomen, moaning at the mere thought of E inside of him._

_"Ah~ hnng ah, W- wait," L gasped out, pulling away from their heated make-out, leaving them both panting messes. "I-I thought you might want a snack so I brought these," L said as he took out the container of strawberries and the unused icing._

_"To be honest," he said with his eyes cast to the side, looking anywhere but E's face. "Your cake turned out horribly so I thought maybe... I could be your cake?" His face was unbelievably red._

_E could hardly contain himself, 'How is he so cute?! And how did I get so lucky?'_

_"Hmm," E said like he was in deep thought. "But I thought you were my present."_

_If possible L's face got even redder. "W-well I mean, can't I be both?" His eyes flicked up to meet the brunet's._

_His eyes were so beautiful. Impossibly bright with hues of green and blue mixed together. It was L’s favorite color._

_He moaned loudly._

_The sound went right down to E's crotch, reminding him that his pants were still on and ridiculously uncomfortable. The sultry look in the raven’s stormy gray eyes was so enticing._

Uhhh…does L even have gray eyes? I thought they were darker than that. Like all black…I guess they could be gray… But who the fuck was E? An OC?

_E did another sweep of L's sweet form, brushing his fingers through the raven’s soft silky hair and feeling his undercut when an idea popped into his head._

…L doesn’t have undercut… stormy gray eyes… I glanced up at Levi who was still staring at me from the other side of the counter; our lunch lay forgotten and cold. I swallowed the lump that was growing in the back of my throat and my mouth suddenly felt incredibly dry as I tried to form words. I looked from Levi to the computer screen and back again, completely aghast.

“She…Izzy…she…”

“Well looks like you figured it out. Was it the undercut?”

I nodded slowly.

“Yeah I figured it out a bit sooner, but now you know. And let me just say she sure as hell doesn’t stop at the playful kissing."

“Well, I mean...I didn’t think that she would, it’s obviously a ‘Porn Without Plot’…I just didn’t realize it was about…us...” My voice trailed off as a thousand different things shot through my head at once. Why the hell would Isabel write a fan-fiction about Levi and I? Isn’t that weird? We’re talking about one of her best friends and her older brother here!

The worst part was that Levi was definitely right. There’s no way this stopped at playful kissing. I hadn’t even finished the first page of the story.

I desperately wanted to erase all traces of the document, but at the same time, the desire to know what else she wrote was quickly overtaking me.

“Should I uhhh keep reading or…?”

Levi shrugged nonchalantly. “Doesn’t matter. I’m going to kill her with a toilet brush the next time I see her, regardless.”

“You read the whole thing.”

He glanced up at me startled before a slight blush crept up his cheeks and he turned away.

That settled it.

I was going to read it. Or at least skim it.

_He smirked, "hmm, well if you’re my present then you’re missing something." He crawled off L, leaving him confused and propped up on his elbows._

_When he returned to the bed, he was holding a matching pink ribbon, which he swiftly tied to the raven's dick before placing it back down to lie against L's stomach._

_"There, now you’re perfect," He mumbled as he pressed one of the strawberries to L's mouth, both of them nibbling opposite ends until the middle was left to drift between them as their mouths clashed together for a second time._

HOLY FUCK! I TIED A FUCKING BOW AROUND HIS PENIS!!! Reading this now that I knew the story was meant to be about Levi and I changed everything. And not in a good way. My body was rapidly shifting from being turned on—by imagining Levi spreading himself in front of me in lingerie—to being incredibly nauseated to the point of throwing up everywhere because Isabel wrote this.

I scrolled a bit further down.

_“You want my cock, don’t you? You want me buried deep inside of you. I bet you’re dying to know what it feels like. Isn’t that right? You want to know what it’s like to have me in your ass, making sweet love to you. Were you curious about it L?”_

_“Yes! I was curious; I couldn’t stop thinking about it! I want you!”_

_E’s smile turned wolfish as he leaned down and peppered kisses all over L’s neck, hand caressing every inch of his skin._

_“Then give me your virginity for my birthday.”_

I was blushing like crazy. This was Levi as a virgin. And I was topping. And this was _really_ awkward. I had my hands over my eyes trying to hide as my eyes continued the page through the cracks in my fingers. I could only bring myself to read bits and pieces at this point.

“ _Yes! Anything! I’ll give you anything you want!”_

_“Very good pet. Now let me see those panties.”_

_“Yes, my master.” L mewled as he rolled over and boldly lifted his ass into the air._

_“A-ah more please more!”_

_“That’s no way to ask is it?”_

_“Please give me more, master!”_

_“Mmmm, very good.”_

_“I’m putting it inside, L.”_

_“YES! A-aah! Please put your large cock inside of me, master!”_

_“Ngn.” E thrust his hips forward. He went slowly to avoid hurting L as he took his virginity. He had stretched him well and used a lot of lube, but it would still hurt._

_“It’s okay E. I’m okay. Now move, please move! I want to feel your cock pounding into me!”_

I flinched at L’s request, thinking back to my first experience and how much it hurt. This Levi didn’t seem to care much about the pain though.

_“YES! HOLY SHIT YES! JUST LIKE THAT,” L was screaming in pleasure as E rhythmically thrust in and out of him at a steady pace, grabbing L’s cock and stroking him._

_“A-AHHH! FEELS SO GOOD!”_

_“I LOVE YOU!”_

_“MORE! HARDER!! PLEASE MORE!!!”_

My face was impossibly hot and red. I could feel the blush reaching to the tips of my ears and the base of my neck. I swear there was probably smoke curling around me.The story continued on in the same painful manner.

L and E fucked like animals. 

 _Levi and I_ fucked like animals.

I mean sure, we’ve had sex plenty of times, hell we’ve started calling it _our_ room (which of course makes me happier than a fucking Shinigami eating an apple) and my clothes take up just as much room in the closet as his. Waking up wrapped in his arms every morning has been fucking amazing.

But this was a _fanfiction_! Written by _Isabel_!!!

“This…This…This isn’t even remotely close to anything that possibly could have happened or could happen in the future or or—”

“Yeah, you’re telling me. She made me a fucking shameless virgin. Nice to know what my dear little sister thinks of me.” He humphed indignantly.

He glared at me when I laughed, quickly slapping a hand over my own mouth to muffle the sound.

He sighed, “Ready for the kicker?”

“You’re kidding right? There’s more?”

“You bet your ass there's more. Literally. There's more. Us making love like porn-dependent blushy virgins on your birthday is just the start.”

He grabbed back the computer and showed me a folder labeled “Ereri/Riren yaoi”

“This” He jabbed the screening, “Is our couple name. Ereri means you’re on top, Riren means that I am.”

I felt my jaw go slack.

“How many are there?!!!”

He scoffed. “A lot. I’ve already gone through three, not including ‘ _E’s Birthday Present’_.”

I just stared at him wide eyed.

“I think right now my personal favorite is _‘The D Will Blow Up a Storm Again’_.” His voice was dripping with sarcasm.

“Oh God.” I groaned and covered my face once again. I really should’ve covered my ears.

“It starts out with you saying something about showing me how great you are and then somehow turns into me telling you that …how did she phrase it?” He tapped his chin thoughtfully. “There really were some great lines in there. Now how did this one go? Ah yes, I remember. ‘I’ll show you a sight that you’ve never seen before.’ Then I rip your clothes off and—”

“And we make love like bunnies.” I finished, voice muffled by my hands.

“Not quite. Close though.”

 I uncovered my face and looked at him expectantly.

“I give you the blowjob of a lifetime and it’s all well and good until you see how big my dick is and totally freak out. I inform you that ‘this isn’t even my final form’ and my huge dick gets even bigger and you practically swoon. I tell you to ‘believe in the me that believes in you’ and then I make a mess of your cute little ass. Luckily you’re not a virgin in that one so I don’t completely break you with my cock.”

My eyes were popping out of my head for sure. “I…I…” I didn’t even know what to say.

“As it stands now there are more Ereri than Rirens so I’m sure you’ll be able to find one where Isabel goes to explicit lengths to describe the huge donkey dick that you wield like a fucking weapon on _my_ ass.”

“Please don’t say that kind of shit, Levi. It’s disturbing.”

“Yeah, no kidding. And you’re not even the one who had a pink bow tied to their penis.”

Hold it in Eren. Hold it in.

I failed.

Laughter erupted out of me like a tidal wave. “You had- You had a freaking bow wrapped around your dick! Because you were a present! Oh my God, could you imagine what you would do to me if I tried to wrap a pink ribbon around your dick? Holy shit, you’d kill me!” I nearly fell off my chair as I laughed my head off, thinking about Levi wearing a pink baby doll and letting me tie a bow around his penis. Holy shit, it was too funny.

If I tried any of that shit he’d have me seeing stars for sure. And not in a good way.

I wiped tears out of my eyes and looked back up to see him still staring at me. He had calmed down quite a bit since when I first walked into the kitchen.

“So what are we gonna do about this?”

“Well first I’m going to check all the dates that these were written and then she is going to receive the most beautiful love letter a big brother could send.”

“Oh boy.”

“Actually Christmas is only a few months away. Maybe I’ll ambush her then so we can have a nice little discussion in person.”

“I’ll let you decide this, Heichou.”

“Yeah, whatever you say, master.”

I grinned at him, “Ooh. I think I just got turned on.”

“Shut the fuck up and eat your lunch.”

I looked down at the dish that he had made while I was in the shower, which was a considerable amount of time ago now, yet despite how delicious it looked…

“…You know…I don’t think I really have that much of an appetite right now.”

“…Yeah me neither.”

* * *

“Hey Levi welcome home.” I managed to call tiredly. Today had been absolutely exhausting in all senses of the word.

He only grunted in response to my greeting.

“Fuck Eren, what is _that_?”

I sighed heavily. Not like this conversation could be avoided.

 _That_ was probably a reference to the pieces of glass I was picking up off the floor and depositing into a wastebasket. What was left of the once large vanilla candle that had been toppled over was scattered between the floor and the bin.

“What the fuck happened?!”

“It just got knocked over Levi, it’s nothing to yell about.”

“That’s why I don’t leave breakable shit out in the open! What was the candle doing there?”

“I put it there!” I snapped.

 “Yeah, well that much is obvious.” He scoffed, “I’m just wondering how you could have expected this to not end in shattered glass. How could you possibly think that was a good idea?”

“Because the house was starting to smell like cat piss from a certain someone’s morning expenditure, so excuse me if I lit a vanilla candle as I cleaned up _that_ fucking mess!” My voice had started rising to match Levi’s and all the frustration and stress had me at breaking point. I really didn’t want to be dealing with this shit right now.

“So why the fuck didn’t you put it away when you were done?”

“Because maybe I forgot about it, okay?! Maybe I was too caught up in trying to iron _your_ fucking shirts as quickly as possible so that _your_ damn cat wouldn’t run off with all the fucking socks. Or God forbid he steals your underwear and puts holes in them! Why are you making such a big deal out of it?”

“He only steals shit because he’s trying to get attention. If you played with him more then he wouldn’t do it.” He huffed in exasperation as if he were reprimanding a child.

“My entire day doesn’t revolve around watching him Levi. I have other shit that needs my attention!”

“Then don’t light a fucking candle and walk away!”

“You’re not the one on _your_ knees cleaning up the damn mess, so chill the fuck out!”

“But I am the one who has to come home with glass all over _my_ fucking living room.”

That got me.

“Well, then why don’t _you_ play with _YOUR_ fucking cat?!!” I nearly screamed. “I wasn’t aware that fucking cat sitter was included in the boyfriend description! Sorry for doing _other_ shit with my time when I was supposed to be properly watching _your_ fucking cat!”

Levi’s eyes widened at my sudden outburst.

I promptly shoved the last of the larger pieces of glass into the bin and marching out of the room. I climbed the stairs hurriedly and slammed the door shut behind me. I just wanted to be left alone in our room for a while. _His_ bedroom, I thought bitterly.

I had torn up the tips of my fingers pretty badly. The arguing had distracted me and I hadn’t been as careful picking up the rest of the glass. I had unconsciously clenched my hand into a fist when I started yelling leaving a few small bits of glass embedded in my hand. Somehow I hadn’t felt the stinging until now.

I heard the distant hum of the vacuum cleaner as I made my way to the bathroom to try and clean up my hands.

I hissed at each scrap of glass that I wrenched from my palm with my tweezers. My left hand wouldn’t do what I wanted and each attempt was clumsy. I silently cussed out all ambidextrous people. There was still glass and a much larger part of my hand was now sore from all the failed jabs I had inflicted upon myself.

I was startled by the sharp rap on the door.

“What?” I called.

“Eren. Open the door.”

Glancing from my fingers to the door nob I softly replied, “No.” I really didn’t want him to see this, but I also knew that I probably couldn’t get all of the glass out by myself.

“Eren. I know you cut your hand. I’m sorry. Please open the door.”

Relenting, I slowly peeled myself away from the sink, gently shutting off the water as the cold shards bit into my skin. I opened the door to the bathroom with my non-dominant and decisively less injured hand, letting Levi into the bathroom.

As soon as the door was open he grasped my wrist to inspect the damage.

“Fuck.” He hissed.

“It’s not that bad,” I muttered looking away.

He smoothly pushed me back into the bathroom and began rummaging around for the first-aid supplies, muttering obscenities all the while.

Neither of us said anything. I can personally attest that I was a little scared to say anything that might accidently instigate a fight. I couldn’t trust my mouth with words right now. They would probably come out all wrong.

He gestured at the bathroom counter and I obliged, propping myself up on the edge.

He set to work washing all of his supplies and didn’t stop scrubbing until he was fully convinced of their cleanliness. With a small nod of approval after closely inspecting the metal tweezers he quickly moved to stand in front of me and pulled my hand towards him.

I flinched as I felt a stab of pain shoot up my arm. He rubbed soothing circles and caressed my hand, helping me calm down. He held my hand steady and efficiently pulled all of the glass out before I could fully rationalize the stinging.

“Shit.” I hissed, staring down at my hand.

Levi linked his arms around me and pulled me off the counter, setting me in front of the sink and turning back on the faucet. He gently rubbed my hand with his thumbs and washed it with soap and cold water. He was so gentle that it was kind of hard to still be mad at him. Kind of.

“Better.” He muttered after inspecting my hand again.

He pulled away and handed me a towel. As I dried my hands he pulled out antibiotic ointment and dressing.

“It’s not that bad,” I repeated again.

“I’ll treat you until I’m satis—” He blatantly flinched at his own outburst. “Sorry.” He muttered turning away.

I was done being a wimp.

“Levi, I’m sorry.” He whipped back to face me. His eyebrows were drawn together in confusion so I kept going. “I was really tired and I really wanted to have everything in order when you got home because I knew you would freak out about the glass on the floor and it would’ve been bad if Shami had walked over it or eaten any and when you said the whole thing about _your_ house I got all, I don’t even know. And I just started acting like a little bitch an—”

“Eren, Stop!”

My eyes snapped up to meet his.

He exhaled deeply. “Eren, I’m just as at fault as you, you idiot. More so, actually. Don’t take the blame for the whole damn argument, brat.” He cupped my face with his hand and peered up at me. “I had a terrible day at work and I freaked the fuck out when you were picking up the glass ‘cause I knew you were going to cut yourself if you did it like that and, instead of getting you to stop, I ended up not only being the reason why you got hurt, but I made it so much worse. And then you didn’t even feel comfortable asking me to get the glass out even though you couldn’t possibly do it yourself.”

There was a pause.

“Eren. I’m so sorry.” With that, he lifted my hand and kissed it lightly.

I threw myself at him and clung there. “I was really pissed about it being your house. I don’t know why I got so emotional.”

“You dumbass, you live here too. Just because I say _my_ house doesn’t mean that it’s not yours too. You can say _my_ house or _our_ house because it’s both. This is _your_ home and _our_ home. Got it?”

I nodded like a bobble head.

He let out a deep chuckle and then brought his lips to mine. His hands were on both sides of my face, bringing me down to him and I couldn’t help but sigh when his fingers pushed back and began massaging my scalp. He pulled me closer. The kiss was deep and long.

We broke apart for breath and let our foreheads rest against each other.

“I’m sorry Eren. Please don’t ever feel like you can’t come to me. Especially when you’re hurt.”

“You always come after me when I need it most. Thank you, Levi.”

I reached down and kissed him once more, desperate to taste his lips again. I kissed him slowly and playfully, letting him explore every inch of my mouth with lazy flicks of his tongue.

He was looking up at me with hooded eyes and the surge of lust that rolled over me wasn’t something that I could calm down with us pressed this close together.

I was leaning towards him with questioning eyes as he placed both hands on my hips. This kiss was faster, more eager than the other two. In the midst of it all he harshly ground his hips against mine, earning a loud moan. I could see where a tent was beginning to form in his pants and it was nice to know that I wasn’t the only one.

He grabbed the back of my head egging me on into the kisses that were becoming sloppier by the second. My mouth was complacently open for him as he allowed his tongue to work wonders inside my mouth. Tongue flicking against mine as his hands began to roam over my body

Then we were grappling for each other, hands tugging as our tongues moved against each other. His body arched against me and he jerked my hair, making me moan.

His hands traveled down my back, caressing me until he reached my ass. He grabbed it with both hands before trailing down to the back of my thighs to lift me up into the air.

I never stopped kissing him even as he kicked aside the bathroom door to move us into the bedroom. 

* * *

I pulled open the door to find a grinning red headed enthusiast on the front porch.

“Sorry I’m late,” She grinned holding a tilted peace sign to her eye. “I got lost on the path of life.”

 I beamed at her. “I guess you did.”

Bags littered her feet, where she had placed them to ring the doorbell.

“Ahhhhhh! I missed you so much!” Isabel sprang onto me wrapping me in a bear hug that vaguely reminded me of Hanji, who had done the exact same thing upon seeing me.

“I can’t wait to see everyone!”

I only continued to smile.

  
“Welcome home Isabel.”  A rather scary Levi appeared with a saccharine smile plastered on his face. “We have quite a lot of _things_ to discuss.”

“Levi, don't you think that should wait?"

“No, this is our fight.”([x](http://myanimelist.net/anime/18277/Strike_the_Blood))([p](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/S9fJswUgnGc/hqdefault.jpg))

With that Isabel was whisked away, sending a pleading look over her shoulder.

“Let’s meet again someday, Eren.” She called melodramatically, knowing full well that her impending doom was unavoidable.

* * *

“See, this is what happens when you take too long to eat your piece of cake, you dumbass.” Levi gestured to the now liquefied ice cream cake as he took it to the counter along with his own dish.

“Well if you hadn’t distracted me so much I would’ve been more focused on eating it.”

Isabel catcalled as Farlan yelled, “Get a room!”

Christmas this year was as rambunctious as ever and it was just the way I liked it. Everyone was able to make it and having a full house again was nice even if it was only for a limited time.

But the best part was that everyone could be here to celebrate Levi’s birthday with him. Even if he didn’t say it, I could tell that he was really happy.

As everyone began filing into the family room I helped Levi clear all the dishes and load them in the dishwasher.

I was in the process of rinsing a particular dish that was covered in ice cream when Levi came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist.

“So why ice cream cake? Wasn’t that hard to make?”

“Yeah it was, but I wanted to.”

“Why?”

I leaned my head backward and shut the sink off.

“Because everything changed when I dumped ice cream on your shirt.” I shot him a joking smile and batted my eyelashes, “It brought us together.”

He grunted and shook his head. “You really are a corny little shit, you know that?”

“Oh course.” I grinned, turning around to grab a towel and dry my hands so I could wrap them around his neck and pull him into a chaste kiss.

“Let’s go open your birthday presents. I’ve been looking forward to the free condoms and lube from Hanji for a while now.” I snickered at the scowl that crossed his face and kissed him again.

As it turned out, Hanji did, in fact, buy Levi another bulk of condoms and lube. The good shit too. I made more than a few jests about how excited I was to use them tonight, which did wonders for getting Annie and Mikasa to finally head home. But it did backfire when Hanji responded with eagerness to stay longer and express her jealousy towards Farlan and Isabel who would be staying in the guest room.

As a result, it was long past midnight by the time we managed to get everyone to go home.

“Eren?”

“Yep?” I responded back in exhaustion.

“C’mere.”

I walked back into the family room to find Levi standing, waiting for me. The Christmas lights cast a golden glow around the darkened room and I couldn’t help but be entranced by the shadows and shapes that they cast on the wall and on Levi. It was beautiful. He was beautiful.

Levi ran a hand through his hair as I approached.

“What’s wrong?”

“You know I’m not romantic and it is after midnight so I guess it’s not that cheesy, but…”

He grabbed my hands and kissed them, peering up into my eyes before leaning up and pulling me into a deep kiss.

“Marry me.” He murmured against my lips.

My brain completely short-circuited and I sputtered senselessly.

Before I could even register what the fuck was happening, he was down on one knee and holding out a ring.

“Eren. Marry me?”

My eyes were bulging out of my head as I tried to take it all in. And my head was a mantra of ‘Oh my God’s and ‘HolyshitHolyshitHolyshitshitshit!’s.

“Eren?”

Somewhere in the back of my mind I realized that in my daze I still hadn’t given him an answer yet.

“Yes! Oh shit yeah, yes. I-Yes!”

His face broke out into a wide smile and he slid the ring onto my finger before rising to his feet and pulling me into his arms.

His lips were against mine and I was desperately trying to figure out a way to kiss him back, laugh, and cry all at the same time.

“I love you. I love you so much.”

“Holy shit. Tell me you got that all! Tell me you got it!”

“Yes I got it, you dumb piece of poop. And it was perfect until you ruined the moment!”

Levi and I reeled around to see Farlan and Isabel crouched by the entrance of the living room.

Farlan was, of course, holding an iPhone in his hands and no doubt recording everything.

“You are both so dead. And why the fuck are you even down here?!”

Farlan lowered the phone from his face and stood up with a smile. “Isabel found the ring while she was snooping through your room. Apparently, your favorite hiding place is still the same as always.” He ruffled Izzy’s hair as she sprang up next to him.

“Anyway! CONGRATULATIONS!!!” She barreled towards us and wrapped her arms around Levi and me.

Farlan laughed and entered the group hug as well.

“Welcome to the family, Eren.”

“I love you guys.” I beamed at all the wonderful faces around me.

Levi groaned. “I hate you all.”

But we could all see that bright smile on his face as he held us all tightly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ANIME:  
> Hetalia  
> Death Note  
> Fairy Tail  
> Hyouka  
> Black Butler  
> One Piece  
> Dragon Ball Z  
> Free  
> Gurren Lagann  
> Naruto  
> Strike the Blood  
> Angel Beats  
> Avatar
> 
> There were a few quotes that I really wanted to use, but it just didn't happen. Oh well! C'est la vie ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯  
> I hope you guys liked it and felt that little bubble of content-ness that comes with happy endings. 
> 
> And if you REALLY liked it then stay tuned for future fanfics because I am just getting started here! I am also pushing Miss Editor to get her fanfic rolling because I love it. I also have plans for two other fanfics and I'll post when I start really getting one going. The tone of voice is going to be different though. A bit more formal, like less use of the fuck word, third person, that kind of thing.
> 
> I did that thing where I got a tumblr, so that's CloudFlowerandherKami, if anyone... I don't even know. Whatever.
> 
> C YA ;)
> 
>  
> 
> [ tumblr](http://http://cloudflowerkami.tumblr.com/)


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